Sex Humor Porn Stories
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Check what the tablets you are taking actually do!

I have to admit that I am not exactly loyal to my partner, and have had some hot sex with guys I met in clubs, so when my partner said he had some Penis Improvement Pills I jumped at the chance, just imagine, a massive 12" cut cock to fuck the guys with wowee... Phil, my partner said he had decided to leave me anyway, so if I had a massive member I would get anyone I wanted. I was sorry as Phil had been a good fuck, ahh well all good things come to an end. After he had packed his clothes (the house is mine) and left I made a coffee, sat down and read the instructions on the tablets, th... Continue»
Posted by lycraguy 15 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
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My Neighbour 4

It was a lovely hot Saturday and I was outside washing my car on my drive, when my neighbours door opened and my very hot redheaded neighbour Faith stepped out.
"Hey Joe, you busy?" she asked with a grin.
"Well, i'm washing the car" I replied
"I see" she said stepping towards me in just a black bikini and matching high heel shoes and showing off that stunning fit tanned body of hers.
"So if invited you in to my place for a drink and blow job, you would probably say no then?" she asked mischievously.
"Well, I would certainly have to think about it" I replied smiling.
Then Faith stepped ar... Continue»
Posted by bighornycock123 18 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Unknowingly -Toothbrush Masturbation Revenge

Sarah thinks she can throw a house party and not invite me? Just because I let her boyfriend play with my tits? I flash them all the time to the guys at the park. Mark should have had more control when someone shakes a pair in front of his face, especially if his girlfriend is such a prude. I will make that bitch pay.

Her parents were away for the weekend leaving just Sarah and her brother to look after their big family house. She threw parties often and invited all the popular k**s from college, including my occasional fling Mike. It was easy to convince Mike to sneak me into the party. He... Continue»
Posted by ComfyFace 20 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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A Happy Accident, Milf Adventures 1-3

Volume 1, Story 3


Trying to give a woman road head is a fools errand especially if she has nice full thighs. I tried vigorously to eat her pussy, but my tongue wasn't quite long enough to reach. "Honey, honey, hon, hon?......baby stop, just stop" She said looking down at me with a sad look on my face "Awww, I appreciate it, I do but, this is just nonsense, all you are doing is licking my inner thighs and pussy lips". Sandy was right you cant eat a woman's pussy while she's driving, her legs need to be spread and there just isn't enough room in a Chevrolet Aveo, to really get down inside ... Continue»
Posted by valhan21st 23 days ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Zombies want Sperm

A Halloween special story.

Julie had suggested camping. Frank's breakup had been devastating. They needed to get him out of the house and force him to start living again. Roberto wanted to organize a softball game in the park. Walter thought a horror movie marathon would put him to rights. Angela wanted to take him to that raunchy strip club across the county line, where there was nobody to enforce the decency laws. But Julie would not be deterred. So camping they went.

They chose the forest to the east of town. There were no campsites, no restrooms, and no barbecue grills... Continue»
Posted by mujamacc 23 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Baby maker 5

Out of nowhere I got a message from an old friend to meet up for drinks, so keen to see her again I agreed and the next day we met for a beer in a bar.
Chloe strolled into the bar shortly after I arrived, and she still looked as stunning as she did the last time I had seen a few years ago.
Her short blonde hair, petite body and an ass so round it looked like she was smuggling half a beach ball down there, was still a thing of beauty.
So I quickly paid for the first round, and we got to drinking and catching up, and after a couple more drinks she finally said why she had called me after all ... Continue»
Posted by bighornycock123 24 days ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Committing memories to paper - part 1

After reading so many stories on this website and others over the years, I thought I would take the opportunity to share some of my experiences and memories if for no other reason than for my own Amusement but hopefully it will be of interest to the community at large so I would appreciate any feedback you have to offer. Also I'm using voice recognition so I apologize in advance for any errors.

I am remembering today a relationship that I had that was spawned through the days of an AOL chat room. Who knew that you can actually meet real people back then on aol for sex but it worked in this ... Continue»
Posted by rob_smith 24 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Ends Up Cumming On Their Tits

The story begins on the back porch where two women wait to service me. One is my girlfriend and the other is someone I don't know; they are both without clothes and both heavy breasted. I'm sitting in a chair naked because no one is ever around at this time of night. Nervously, my girlfriend holds my cock and offers it to the other woman. I wonder if they even know each other by they're behavior. Trina holds tight at the base and tugs it erect, then looks at the other naked girl and says "Cindy I told you I wanted to watch you suck my boyfriend's cock. It's all yours". She didn't even ask me i... Continue»
Posted by randydandygene 24 days ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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A Different Kind Of Costume Party...

A friend of mine from work had asked me to go to a masquerade party for Halloween this year. I wish I could say I had better plans, but I didn't; So I thought, What the hell? Might as well give it a shot. I dug out an old Zorro costume I'd worn a few years before; And at 7:30 on Halloween night, I hailed a cab and gave instructions to get to the condominium my friend invited me to. The scene was what one might expect - Mostly well to do types and heavy drinking. I didn't mind the drinking; but I was not exactly the kind of social butterfly that stood out in such circles. I had only been there... Continue»
Posted by Pervton50 25 days ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Baby maker 4

I stepped into the office and closed the door behind me, Mrs Preston had called me in to discuss something important, and so i stood in front of her desk waiting for her to begin.
"Steve" she said looking up at me "I'm going to get right to it, in the last few weeks you've been caught twice on the security cameras screwing other members of staff"
I stood looking very shocked, mainly because I wasn't aware there was security cameras in the offices, and that my boss now knew what I had been doing.
"Now i'm a little annoyed you think fucking married members of staff is more important than your... Continue»
Posted by bighornycock123 25 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Carols Adventure 5

It was Sunday morning at around 11 am that Carol left Rose's house after spending the night there making lesbian love with Rose from yesterday evening until around midnight. Carol had turned up on Rose's doorstep upset and confused and with the love, kindness and understanding of Rose. Carol had being given some good advice as well as good talking to. So this morning she was going to start rebuilding friendships that she had neglected for too long.

Carol went along the road and then turned. A few minutes later she was standing at the garden gate of the Henderson's sisters house and pluckin... Continue»
Posted by Bonanzabay 28 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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O COTA TOMOU O COMPRIMIDO AZUL

Sou proprietária de uma Sex shop e vendo muitos comprimidos potenciadores sexuais. Naquela manhã tinha recebido uns Cialis e uns Vigour azuis que eram muito bons, Passado algumas horas recebi um telefonema de um homem que queria saber se podia passar por lá porque queria comprar umas coisas. Dei-lhe a morada e passado uma hora ele apareceu.
Era um cinquentão com ar de trolha, que me olhou com ar de comilão. - Gostava de saber o que tens aí para ter mais tesão e foder durante mais tempo. - declarou - Tenho Cialis e Vigou azul. - Redargui, exibindo os frascos. - levo os dois. Registei os frasco ... Continue»
Posted by sugadorajulia 28 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Mature  |  
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Licking My Frustrations ... by Bigsoftee 34609

There are times that I am frustrated by becoming a senior. And the most obvious affect is the matter of sex. Since my wife went thru menopause (almost 10 years ago), she no longer has any desires for any sex. Snuggling, kissing and hugging are still okay with her but not the actual consummation of sex. So, I often find myself either going out to get a massage and hope for a “Happy Ending” or watch a porn movie on the TV and jerk off. Well, that is until I met a friend in the similar situation.

As a DJ/KJ and website designer, I find myself in contact with a lot of different types of men and... Continue»
Posted by Bigsoftee34609 28 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Carols Adventure 3

It was on a Tuesday afternoon that Carol had made one of her secret plans for having the house completely to herself. She was now just waiting for her special guest to arrive. She had nervous butterflies in her stomach and her head was spinning with, what if's, maybe's and should she's, Carol was in a very personal turmoil. The more she thought about it, the more uncertain and confused she became about it. Then the door bell rang.

Carol answered the door and there he was standing there with a tool box and a big grin all over his handsome young face.
'Service Madam?' He said 'I believe you... Continue»
Posted by Bonanzabay 28 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Carols Adventure 4

Saturday afternoon and Linda and Billy were upstairs in bed together having quiet moment between their love making. Downstairs Carol Campbell her mother slipped on her coat and walked down the street and arrived at an old friend and neighbours house. She went in the gate and up to the house, pressed the doorbell and waited.

A few moments later the door was opened by Rose.
'Surprise!' Said Carol.
'Carol dear it is a surprise, how are you dear?' Rose asked Carol.
'Oh you know! Up and down' Carol said and then a tear ran down one cheek of her face and she lowered her head as she burst in... Continue»
Posted by Bonanzabay 28 days ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Carols Adventure 2

Linda Campbell was getting ready for a bath after a long days work at the supermarket stacking shelves and serving customers. She dropped her uniform and other clothes onto the bedroom floor and pulled on her dressing gown and went across the hallway to the bathroom and turned on the taps. Water both hot and cold mixed and filled the bath.

Downstairs her mother, Carol, was cooking dinner. The TV was on and talking to no one in particular in the living room and the clock on the wall was telling the time at a little after 8 PM. On a Tuesday. Neighbours up and down the street were doing the s... Continue»
Posted by Bonanzabay 28 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Carols Adventures

They say that every story that you ever hear or read about at one time or another actually happened. With that in mind it is well worth remembering that sometimes the story gets told so many times that the original story gets lost in the many telling and re-telling's. However always there is a core of truth at the centre of it all...

So it was a Saturday afternoon about 3 o'clock when Carol went quietly up the stairs and listened to the sounds of sex coming from her daughter's Linda's bedroom and when she carefully reach the door peeked inside to see what was happening on the bed. There wa... Continue»
Posted by Bonanzabay 28 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Der Lottogewinn

Der Lottogewinn

Marina hat schon so einiges in ihrem Leben erlebt. Sie hat als Callcenteragent gearbeitet, war Dessousverkäuferin, Sekretärin.. aber all das hat ihr Leben nicht wirklich erfüllt. Jetzt, mit 39 Jahren meint es das Glück aber mal so richtig gut mit ihr! In einer Klassenlotterie hat sie 5 Millionen Euro gewonnen! Man stelle sich vor… das ist eine 5 mit 6 Nullen dahinter vor dem Komma! Selbst bei 2% Verzinsung ergibt das, nach Steuern, immerhin noch etwa 60.000 Euro. Pro Jahr! Mehr, als sie jemals verdient hat bisher. Und dann ist das Geld ja immer noch da!!

Sicher, wenn man so v... Continue»
Posted by smgb 1 month ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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Der Tag, an dem ich ein neues Glück fand

Der Tag, an dem ich ein neues Glück fand

Da muss ich also mit 62 Lenzen auf dem Buckel erfahren, dass Alter nicht vor Geilheit und Glück zugleich schützt! Wie vor 5 Jahren meine Frau das irdische Zu Hause verlassen musste, brach für mich alles zusammen. Wochenlang, nein, Monatelang hab ich nicht mal einen Fuß vor die Tür gesetzt, mit Ausnahme meines Weges zur Arbeit. Aber damit ist seit 1 Jahr nun auch Schluss. Jetzt bin ich also ein „Rentier“ mit unsagbar viel Zeit! Und so langsam wächst in mir der Gedanke, dass es das doch wohl noch nicht gewesen sein kann! Klar, 62 Jahre… da ist in Sachen ... Continue»
Posted by smgb 1 month ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, First Time  |  
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Un amour qui commence

Elle le voyait souvent rentrer chez lui quand elle regardait par la fenêtre de sa chambre. Elle voyait aussi rentrer son épouse. Quel âge pouvait-il avoir ? L’année précédente, elle s’était aperçue qu’il ne s’habillait plus que de couleur sombre et elle en avait déduit que son épouse était morte.
Elle était timide et elle s’ennuyait chez elle et elle pensait souvent qu’elle détestait les gens, que personne ne méritait son attention. Ses parents vivaient côte à côte et elle ne se souvenait pas de les avoir entendus avoir eu entre eux une vraie conversation. Elle avait vu sa mère se masturber et... Continue»
Posted by helene2012 1 month ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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