Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 66

a knock at the door

Jeremy, having had another lonely dinner, sat down to watch the evening news on the television. Just as the weather report had started, his attention was interrupted by a barrage of very light tapping on his front door.
Wondering who could be visiting him at this late hour, he stood up and moved towards the entry way. As the door creaked open, he noticed a a beautiful brunette, (about in her early twenties or late teens) was standing before the threshold, shaking and nervous in appearance.
Before he could ask what she needed, this tiny half whimpering voice, uttered light... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Water Masturbation

One great thing about my tiny apartment is my big soaker bath tub. I spend lots of time there relaxing and washing away the day's worries. Tonight was one of those nights when I needed to soak with bubbles surrounding my aching body. Work wasn't overly difficult today but I've been stressed out a lot lately.

As I laid in the tub, I started to think about my One. He loves to bath me, wash me, caress me in the tub. He treats me like his "little girl" and I love that. But it had been a while since I had masturbated and came. I haven't been in the "mood" which is also very unusual for me. I lai... Continue»
Posted by Kinkster-Gal 5 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Saturday Night Domination

I woke up last Saturday morning to find my beautiful girl Chrissy lying naked asl**p next to me, I kissed her sweet lips tenderly and cuddled up to her whilst thinking how lucky I am to have her... Little did I know, later that day she was going to show exactly how much she owns me!

After half an hour of watching my sl**ping beauty, she began to wake, smiling at me as she opened her heavy eyes and kissing me 'good morning'.
We spent the next hour or so doing as we normally do every Saturday morning, just laying there talking softly to eachother about anything, usually about what we have pl... Continue»
Posted by azid619 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Stranger on a Plane

It was 7 months after the birth of my second c***d and 3 weeks after my tubal ligation. I was mildly anxious because this was my first business trip away from my husband and two k**s in over two years. The trip was important, our company was evaluating a water reclamation project and I was asked to lead the engineering team. I was nervous and my usual self-surety was shaky from the 12 week absence I had taken earlier in the year and the gravity of the current project. Don't get me wrong, I've always been confident in my abilities and I command respect of even the most senior colleagues. My ... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Fun with Cucumbers at the Grocery Store

Prelude: Hot sexy woman describes her sexual escape with a cucumber in the produce section.

I get up this morning and take a quick shower, then put on my favorite short denim jean skirt and a matching color tube top.

I check out myself in the mirror one last time, then say to myself, "Honey, for being a middle aged woman, you look hot!"

After I put on my dark blue high heel shoes, I am off the to store!

The first shopping cart that I choose has a front wheel that clicks, so I decide to turn around and get another one. Suddenly, one of the the guys that work in the produce section t... Continue»
Posted by TonyClinton 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Morning Wood

Stretching with a groan, my hands reach for the warm body I can feel under the covers beside me. The early morning light pours in from the window just above the bed, and as my hands run over your chest -tangling in the thick hair that covers it- I can feel you reaching up to close the blinds. A smile erupts on my suddenly warm face, there can only be one reason for closing the blinds at this time of the morning. I reach above us to the windowsill to grab my glasses, making sure to lean as far over you as possible, my breasts raking over your chest causing my sensitive nipples to harden suddenl... Continue»
Posted by experiencedvirgin 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Slave School - a story i'm working on

update- chapter 8 added

Warning - the following story has BDSM, submission, humiliation and various other humiliating and painful things, if this isn't what your looking for don't read it.

More chapters will be posted on completion of them.

The slave school

Chapter 1 – Arrival

The driver got out and made her way around the long black stretch limousine, fearing what will happen to her if she kept her master waiting for too long, she sped up, her short black mini skirt creeping up an inch, revealing her clean-shaven cunt beneath it. Arriving at the back of the limo, she took ... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Special Stuffing-Happy Thanksgiving

" I can't beleive I'm doing this"
A thick wet slap resounds from the steel sink. It is followed by a moist gurgle and then the sound of wet suction followed by another wet slap.
"Don't throw out the gizzards, they're for the gravy."
A trilling giggle hits my ear next, then something heavy and slimy.I turn my head to be met with a slick fleshy column of skin bending towards me.
"That's the neck.Rinse it off and put it in the skilllhehehet." I laugh, pushing her arm towards the sink.
Giggling, she emerses her long fingers beneath the shooting water faucet and rubs them up and down the di... Continue»
Posted by lookyloo 4 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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The New Sexual Awakening

Most guys lose their Virginity in High School, Trevor Smalls wasn't most guys.

A meek and reserved young man, Trevor had a tendency to fade into the background wherever he was, the one exception being the Chemistry Lab that was where he burned hotter than his Bunsen Burner.

Being from a modest background made socializing at Pinkerton University especially difficult, as many of the affluent students didn't take to kindly to mere Scholarship students attending their school.

But Trevor saw an in, a way of making his financial and socially difficulties vanish, the Janice Prize.

The ... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Actual CFNM from college days

I was friends with two roommates, Katie and Laura, who had an apartment in a building I lived in my sophomore year. I'll be honest, neither of them were very attractive. So I never made a play for either of them, but in frank conversations as college students often have I revealed that I had a large penis. (They didn't believe me (or claimed not to) because I was then, as I am now, a skinny guy.) We all know it's not the case, but they insisted that a guy as thin as me could not have as thick and long of a penis as I was describing.

I resisted the temptation to whip it out, hoping instead t... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Jail Bait Part 1

You see, I work with criminals at a half way house. On their way out but not quite free yet. Like clock work at 7pm is curfew, i work with one other guy at this location. It's in The Bronx, a lot of people who live in the neighborhood doesn't know what kind of house this is. For the most part it's extremely quiet and neat. Most of the time I'm left alone in the house I work the midnight to 8 am shift.
This one night around 3:30am. I was reading a romance novel, a inmate walked up to the desk, he talked about his case. Like I wanted to hear it at all. Then suddenly the convers... Continue»
Posted by virginblood 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Many years ago when I was about five or six years of age I experimented anally in the bath with a bit of soap; it felt good apart from the soap stinging a little bit.

When I was about ten years of age I got fucked for the first time by a friend of the same age. I don't know where he got the idea from but it felt very nice although there were minor complications.

In my teens a male friend and I used to have wanking races in his bedroom. We used to suck each other but not to orgasm so I never knowingly swallowed his cum.

Around about that time I lost my anal virginity in total to a Ga... Continue»
Posted by AussieJonno 4 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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That one time in the bushes next to school

This, like all the stories I post on here, is a true story.

I studied arts in high school, which basically meant my school was a melting pot of stoners, hot alternative chicks, emo k**s and a bunch of teacher’s still thinking they’re 16 years old. The school was one giant orgy: over the four years I attended it, I must’ve fucked about 30 to 35 girls, including all of my female classmates but one. I have so many stories to tell about my time there, but I’ll start with just one.

That time in the bushes.

At one of our school parties, I’d made up with this girl who was a year younger than... Continue»
Posted by Mercutio85 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo, Voyeur  |  
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cum over for a drink (short but sweet)

I have this story to share, never actually told it to anyone before but it’s kind of fun so enjoy.
I live outside of town a couple of miles and therefore the parties always ended up at my place. Far enough from town that we can have a big fire and make some noise and no one cares but close enough to still get a taxi home or whatever. So, this was a typical small party. About 25 people gathered around the fire pit which was in my back yard. The house was always open so people could use the fridge or washroom etc. It was about midnight or so when I accidentally spilled a drink onto my pant leg... Continue»
Posted by mr_pearson12 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Babysitter (Matt and

I had been babysitting off and on for my neighbor (a single dad with two little boys) off and on for the last six years. I’d since moved from the neighborhood, but I was on my way back for an evening of babysitting.
I knew the older boy (Jarrett) would remember me, I wasn’t sure if the younger one (Jon) would. I smiled to myself remembering how sweet both boys were and I knew we’d have fun regardless of whether they remembered me or not.
I’d barely pulled into the driveway when the front door flung open and both boys tore out the front door racing to get to me first.
I noticed that Jarret... Continue»
Posted by Irishqt1980 14 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Blondie/Dennis The Menace: The New Babysitter

Blondie/Dennis The Menace: The New Babysitter (Or When Dennis Meets Blondie)
by Sniper32

One Friday night Dennis was introduced to his new babysitter, a nice young
lady named Blondie Bumsted. She was a 35 years old friend of his mother, she
was a stunning 5'9, slimmed hipped, long legs, a nice ass and a perfect set
of 38c breasts.

Denise's parents Henry and Alice were going out for dinner and dancing for
their anniversary and would be gone most of the night.

Now as everybody knows Dennis is a handful to say the least, and as boys tend to be when there parents are way, get into th... Continue»
Posted by sniper32 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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ICarly Sex Story; IAm Not A Virgin

ICarly Sex Story
Iam Not a Virgin

"I'm sexy Carly"
"and I'm slutty Sam"
"And this is ICarly"
Carly and Sam are doing a normal ICarly rehearsal in their studio with Freddie. As they get half way through Sam gets a text message.
"I gotta go" Sam says
"we're in the middle of rehearsal" Fredie exclaims
"I've got people to see" Sam responds
"Oooo a date?" Carly asked
"You could call it that" Sam says as she leaves with a dirty grin on her face.
"So now what?" Carly asks Freddie
"Oh I've got some tech stuff I need to fix"
"Alright i'll be in my room thinking of ideas for our next show... Continue»
Posted by sexybabe132 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Caught Shaving

Caught Shaving

True Story

My Norwegian wife, Karoline is the stereotypical Scandinavian blond bomb shell, great body, sense of humour, just pure sex on legs. Her 18 year old daughter, Astrid is an absolute stunner. With long shapely legs, an unblemished firm body, she is a mirror image of my wife 20 years ago. No guys, I was never been tempted to touch. Look yes, touch no. Sex with my wife is so great I wouldn’t jeopardise our relationship for an attempt that is sure to fail. I’m twice Astrid’s age and she is fighting off younger more hansom guys, richer and probably with bigger equipm... Continue»
Posted by CanoePirate 29 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo, Voyeur  |  
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My girlfriends boss.

I had been seeing Stacy a while now and popped over to the place where she worked for a lunch date.
When I arrived at her office she wasn't there and after a few minutes of waiting I decided to leave, then a door opened and Stacy's boss walked in.
"Oh hi there, you came to see Stacy?" she asked seeing me sat at Stacy's desk.
"Yeah" I replied politely.
Stacy's boss Lynne was kind of a Milf, a hot mature woman that seem to have a hell of a body and a large cleavage under the business suit she wore.
"Oh well I had to send her out to do a couple of errands" she then said.
"But you can wait i... Continue»
Posted by bighornycock123 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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In the Toolshed - Short Story

Edward Caine, 42, electrician, divorced, lives without a partner since five years. He likes to sit on his front porch and to watch the school girls on their way home. It fascinates him, just to think about their blossoming youth and the trials and disappointment they are growing into. So it's no real wonder where most of his erotic fantasies are coming from:

I walk into the back yard as I hear faint voices coming from my garden shed. But as I approach it to find out who is playing in there the doors suddenly opens. I manage just in time to hide away around the corner: it is a young bloke ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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