Sex Humor Porn Stories

Private Parking (Nooph part one)

I'm a conductor on a commuter railroad in North Jersey. You get to meet a lot of people. Some of them young ladies. I met a real winner years ago from Bangladesh. Spoke with a slight, almost English sounding accent. In that brash, English girl who swears a lot way. She went by the name Nooph. Regular rider from out in Hackensack. She was flirty with me. Still I was a little surprised when she slipped me her phone number. It was printed out on register tape. I knew from chatting with her that she was going to collage and helping out at her uncle's f****y store. What I didn't know was that she w... Continue»
Posted by Frank-o 2 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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When no better word than profane language applies

When I was 22 and a senior in college I had the great fortune to go out with an 18 year old named high school senior named Julie. Julie was tall, 5'7', and buxom. She had at least C-cup breasts with a nice, curvy ass in perfect proportion. The most memorable thing about Julie, however, was not her height, age, or Amazonian build, but her labia minora. I have always avoided the use of this term as it is really too profane for polite company, but here on xhamster, I will tell you that these were THE definition of 'cunt flaps.' Of course, I had heard this term before and I always chalked it up to... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 2 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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If Only, If Only

Another night, another wasted load of sperm, I thought to myself. This is bullshit. I shut my laptop off and switched on the television, finding a movie on TV about these two teens who create the perfect woman from scratch. Lucky bastards. The woman was so sexy and had a sultry English accent. I think, at one time too, she was also married to Steven Seagal, who could probably crush my nuts into oblivion if he wanted to and leave no trace of his existence behind. “So what would you little maniacs like to do first?” She seemed to whisper in her English accent.
You, of course, duh. I felt my dic... Continue»
Posted by redbeardsley 4 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Heavenly Hottie

I was 24 when my whole life changed. My name is Frank. I was a happily married man to a gorgeous Latin wife name l****a. My best friend since high school Tyrone was my business partner. He is a 6 foot tall black linebacker. One of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. My Life was great! Hot wife, best friend, and lots of money! That’s what I thought though? Until one night I came home early to surprise my wife for our Anniversary, but the surprise was on me. I caught her and Tyrone fucking! I was angry, upset, heartbroken. The woman I thought who loved me was fucking my best friend. Then I reali... Continue»
Posted by Angel_of_Erotic 5 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Frankenstein"s cock Monster

It’s been six month since I took my complete transformation to Katie Moon. I Left my life as Man behind since I became this hot sexy, tight body and big tits. I set up a trust fund for myself with my company! Lita and Kelly were very sad to see me go but they knew I had to. I’m now in northern Massachusetts. I have taken up work as an assistant to a Doctor Frank Stein. He is the leading researcher in trying to figure out how to reanimate dead tissue. He is also really hot.

Anyways this story isn’t about him. It’s about our sexual encounter. It all started one night after I left the lab an... Continue»
Posted by Angel_of_Erotic 5 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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When no better word than profane language applies

When I was 22 and a senior in college I had the great fortune to go out with an 18 year old named high school senior named Julie. Julie was tall, 5'7', and buxom. She had at least C-cup breasts with a nice, curvy ass in perfect proportion. The most memorable thing about Julie, however, was not her height, age, or Amazonian build, but her labia minora. I have always avoided the use of this term as it is really too profane for polite company, but here on xhamster, I will tell you that these were THE definition of 'cunt flaps.' Of course, I had heard this term before and I always chalked it ... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 5 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Finding a Roommate

The year after I finished college, I took a job as a junior management trainee in a stock market firm. I hated everything about the job, but it paid my share of the rent while I got my screwed up brain together.

One Saturday, a female showed at our door, asking if we would consider a girl for the roommate opening we had posted. She looked presentable, and I invited her in to meet Sean, my one remaining roommate. The lease was in my name, and it wasn't a good time of the year for finding someone, so I was feeling ambivalent. Women roommates were a curse, my friends had told me, running down... Continue»
Posted by sexykamel 6 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Tunisian Dreams

The drizzle was slowly but surely soaking her and making navigating a bicycle over the "kinderkopjes", the granites cobble stones like round c***dren's skulls, of the small streets of the old Dutch university town, a dangerous affair. One too rash move would have her sliding. Nevertheless, Maartje almost willed her bicycle forward and peddled as fast as she could.

"Maartje Sarah de Vries, you have to make it on time you fool!"

Exactly today when the Cathage exhibition in the archaeological museum would be officially opened by professor Selim Hassan and the ambassador of Tunisia, one of ... Continue»
Posted by sexykamel 6 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Slutty Sarah wins a wet t-shirt competition. She w

She’s back, boys, and sluttier than ever. In this true story she tells me how she took part in a wet t-shirt contest, won it and got herself fucked afterwards.

I saw her in a bar a few days ago and we started talking. Her friend had to leave, so Sarah and I sat with a drink or two. I asked her what she had been doing recently. I won’t bore you with the other things, so let’s get down to the wet t-skirt contest she entered.

She’d been on holiday to America, around Spring Break time and seen an advert for a wet t-shirt competition. She told me ‘I’ve always wished I’d had the courag... Continue»
Posted by KevinGraves2 11 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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MILF B and B


MILF B and B

This is a true story and I’ve changed the name and not fixed the location to protect a lady.


I travel throughout Britain and carry out land inspections. It’s very weather dependant. If it rains I can’t work. I travel to this part of Britain many times a year. I’m going further north than usual so I decide to book a hotel as close as possible to my projects. I didn’t like the hotel and so after a couple of days I asked the barmaid if she knew of a B and B she could recommend. She said no but if I could give her 15 minutes she may be able to fix me up with a widow who coul... Continue»
Posted by CanoePirate 12 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Father And Daughter Share A sl**per





“Goddamit”, Naresh murmured, “I asked you this very morning to keep a double sl**per.”

“I am very sorry Sir,” the guy at the ticket counter said, “I thought we had one remaining, but later I checked that there was only a single sl**per left.”

Naresh and Priya were standing at the makeshift ticket counter of the private bus agency. Priya had an exam on Sunday morning. She shifted uneas
... Continue»
Posted by sexyteja212 13 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Survey about porn

I hope you can answer to my questions. I want to know something about your life with PORN.
If you want to answer my questions please send me a private message with your answers.

1) What kind of porn do you watch? (examples: BDSM; Softcore; Fetish)
2) How often do you watch porn?
3) Why do you watch porn?
4) Do you masturbate to porn movies? If yes, how often?
5) What´s your favourite movie? (name or link)
6) What´s your favourite pornstar?
7) What´s your favourite porn-website?
8) Do you watch it alone or with someone?
9) What do you like the most? Movies or Clips?
10) Would you e... Continue»
Posted by Lance_0815 13 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Lovely Shy Wife To High End e****t



I am software engineer and my husband is a sales director in a reputed mnc. Before marriage I use to work in pune and I got many proposals from the boys but I turned them off….. I mostly use wear a salwar and rarely jeans. Girls around me says that I have very shinning skin and good body shape, even they use to encourage to make friends with the boys and enjoy the life… I turned them all as I believed that any advances (even a kiss) before marriage is sin.

I was v
... Continue»
Posted by bargavi21 13 days ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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From A Married Woman To A Sexy Whore




Hi

My name is Malvika Joshi age 25 years married to Manish 01 year back an NRI who works on a ship, his age is 27 years energetic and active in sex, my stats are 36-30-36 fair and short just like Vidya Balan. I am working as a college teacher, many students, and my colleagues get crazy with my looks and figure. Normally, I wear sarees and salwars but during Saturdays some times jeans with tight tops and kurtas.

So coming to story, this is my real incident whi
... Continue»
Posted by bargavi21 16 days ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Fucking my girlfriend's mother Sanjana

Hi.. i am from bangalore. this is a story a year ago. my friend who is also my neighbuor lives with his mom and his father who is a railway engineer. my friend sachin is fond of movies. and his father is always busy on his work..sachin’s mother name is sanjana.she is almost 37.. i am 18.my mom who used to go to work and comes back only at 6.i used to go to sachin’s house everyday.
when sachin had gone out. i used to sit and chat with sanjana for sometime. she was a good friend of my mother.Our f****y was very close and we used to visit each other for social gathering. I think she was in her l... Continue»
Posted by Sherthi 17 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Sybian and Venus Racing –4 Couples and The Bet.

Sybian and Venus Racing –4 Couples and The Bet.

I fancy a chance of fucking any of my mate’s wives. All six are sexy in different ways. So after a d***ken night out we boys all agreed to find a way to swap partners for a night…….. but how?

I told my wife about our d***ken agreement while I was in the bath the following day. Not to my surprise she said that she was up for it. She moves close to the bath and places my hand on her pussy and as I slip a finger in its obvious that she’s highly aroused. She smiles innocently, steps back, turns and bends over. As her pussy comes into view she s... Continue»
Posted by CanoePirate 17 days ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Collecting my Prescription from the Pharmacist

Collecting my Prescription from the Pharmacist

I’m a fit 55 year old man and I have a few ailments that require a visit to the Pharmacist every month. A couple of months ago they had employed a new Pharmacist. Catching an occasional glance, she has a pretty face behind a pair of black rimmed glasses. If she stands I only get to see her shoulders above the high counter. She’s about 40 -45 with mousey blonde hair and can only be 5ft 2in may be 5ft 4 and a light frame. I’ve never even spoken to her until today.

“I’m sorry to keep you but as you see everyone else has gone. Can I help you?” s... Continue»
Posted by CanoePirate 19 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Bay Area One Night Stand



my name is Deepa and I live in San Francisco bay area.My husband casually introduced my to an Indian porn video website about 7 years back when we were newly married and I found Indian sex stories link in that. He never knows I still follow porn and read these romantic stories here.

As many of you may not know, the life in the bay area for women does not go as smooth as one would think, as we are f***ed to stay home due to visa restrictions. Indian men here do just fine as they go to the office and get a chance to meet and
... Continue»
Posted by sexyteja212 20 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Our last stranger quickie

story shared by a friend.

This is a true story about a one off encounter I had with a man (let's call him Phil) hubby and I met at a hotel the other week.

We'd been in the bar enjoying pre dinner drinks when we got chatting with Phil. He was early 30s over 6ft with jet black hair. He really was tall dark and handsome and I took to him straight away especially as he had such a lovely smile.

He was a business man and on his own and hubby soon got the talk around to how sad it was for him to be away from home. After a few more drinks he jokingly confided that he was missing his wife and... Continue»
Posted by qudduse 20 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Robbie & Eve - I’m right here if you want me

Traffic on I-95 wasn’t too bad as I headed north through New Jersey toward New York. Three days of meetings and property tours around Trenton had been very productive and I had just one last client to visit outside of Boston before I could head back north to Montreal. I could have flown rather than spending time on the road, but I love driving and it allows me to drop in unannounced on properties owned by the REIT (real estate investment trust) that I work for. My surprise visits help to keep our property managers on their toes.

It was an exceptionally cold Friday morning in January and the... Continue»
Posted by qudduse 20 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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