endowedgoddess's Blog
​"You're Not Really Very Dominant"

"You're not really very dominant," said a white male crossdresser I hooked up with several months ago. He was the first of only two I've ever been in bed with, the first time didn't go anywhere, and our clothes never came off, except he got down to his sexy red satin spandex thongs and kept bra on.
I'd always been very sexually attracted to crossdressers, but I learned later I was attracted to the heterosexual ones who still identified very much as male.
There's something highly erotic to me about about a man with typically masculine physical features, such as hairy chest and relentless 5 o'clock shadow, who keeps these visible while wearing feminine clothes.
Anyway, the only 2 crossdressers I've ever fooled around with (and this didn't even happen until a year ago, and then a few month ago), had actually very strong feminine sides and identification. This meant I couldn't enjoy their masculinity.
The second one was exceedingly successful at softening his features and being feminine. One of the reasons I was drawn to him was that he was of a mature age, and also because his face still looked very masculine to me.
When we met, he was dressed in men's clothes, and remained that way even into our sexual encounter (he performed oral on me, as is my thing!) because that was my preference. I wasn't ready to have sex with someone who strongly wanted to be a woman in that moment, which is ironic because I am actually bisexual, love sex with wimmin, and lived for 8 years as a borderline separatist Lesbian.
Anyway, he went down on me twice, and the 2nd time was particularly exquisite as I facesat him (NOT my favorite position) and his very light tongue stroke brought me to full-on rollicking big fuckin' O. Yowza was it good!
Afterwards, as I ate the g****s and mango he prepared for me, we spoke more about his encounters with men (he's bisexual), whom he said really enjoyed crossdressers because they are often more feminine than women, I found myself getting quite aroused by his accounts. Especially when his answer to my question, "Did you swallow?" was "Yes."
As xhamster viewers can see from "My Favorite Videos" I am a ha-YOOGE fan of male-to-male oral, especially gloryholes and bears, who never fake and always swallow. Sooo hot.
Anyway, then he said, "You don't really seem very dominant."
I didn't answer that, but when I left the question still bugged me.
Dominant is NOT wielding a whip and being all physical with your partner and ordering him around. Being dominant to me is one thing and one thing only: Running the show.
I say what I want, and my partners are very accommodating.
It just so happens that what I want is:

1) To be pleasured orally.
2) To be fed.
3) And to be hosted overnight, in part because multi-orgasmic squirting over a couple or few hours takes a lot out of a gal, and the last thing I want to do after that is get up and out into the cold, cruel world. Nope! I just want stay horizontal, where it's nice and warm and commence to snorin' as quickly as possible.

My late partner told me once that I like to be pampered. I think that's true.
I never considered myself a dominant for the longest time, because I didn't fit the mold or play the role of what I mostly saw.
Now, after 25+ years in the BDSM/kink world, know titles are whatever you want them to be, and while I still aware that I'm naturally dominant outside of the bedroom, I now see that I am also dominant in it, because I have very strict rules about what I want, and I don't waver in getting it.

I am a pillow queen with strict rules.
I don't fuck.
I don't want any penetration.
I don't want to see your fucking cock.
I want a man who writes and writes a lot and writes well.
I want a man who shows a lot of attention and erotic admiration to me.
I want a man whose pleasure is my pleasure.
I'm into sensual D/s.
I'm a switch.
I want to be fed.
And I loves my sl**p.

That's who I am!
And if that's not your idea of dominant, that's just fine with me, as titles don't go nearly as far as natural chemistry anyway.

There are submissive tops, and there are dominant bottoms. I'm a lazy ass dominant bottom who prefers to spend all of her physical energy OUTside of the bedroom. Capice?

:)

With Pleasure,
Endowed Goddess
aka Amrita Waterfalls
Blog: http://amritawaterfalls.blogspot.com
Music on Spotify: http://bit.ly/1VeaieF

(c) Copyright 2016 by Amrita Waterfalls. All rights reserved.
Posted by endowedgoddess 5 months ago
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3 months ago
*sigh* not sure if am more turned on by your intellect or your lust :D
3 months ago
fabulous post! so refreshing to read a post from someone who understands that dominance is so much more than whips and chains. Goddess, you are one of the few who know that the brain is the largest sex organ and I appreciate your taking the time to share this.
4 months ago
Well said. Knowing what you want is really very freeing.
4 months ago
Thanks. You are very kind. I checked my PMs on the site and my Yahoo e-mail but did not see your message :-(
I do look forward to talking more.
endowedgo...
retired
4 months ago
Fantastic reply, Will, thank you :) I just emailed you a personal message about how Maryland is not so far away. Look forward to hearing from you.
4 months ago
That was a really informative and insightful post. And you are a fascinating woman. You are refreshingly clear about what you like and expect. And what you wrote about the varied expressions of dominance and submission was really interesting. It's too easy to create mental boxes to help navigate life's experiences but then get stuck inside them.
I am very tempted to apply for a visit to Philly. If I was restricted to only one type of sexual activity for the foreseeable future it would, without doubt, be giving oral pleasure to a woman. And I have had some intense and memorable experiences with non-penetrative sex. For now, let me just say thanks for stirring my mental juices.
endowedgo...
retired
5 months ago
Please comment - thanks!