This is a print version of story The Homebrew by Kinnie from xHamster.com
On the Friday of Faye's third week of absence from the lab, our boss sent me round to check on her. There's only so long you can play the "bit of a bug" card before it becomes taking the piss.
When I rang her bell and waited, I didn't think she was going to answer. It even crossed my mind that she might have bagged a sneaky last-minute flight to somewhere decidedly warmer than dreary old Scotland and had been phoning in her "still not better, I'm afraids" from a poolside somewhere gloriously hot. If I hadn't already been pissed off at her for making me cover her workload, that thought pushed me over the edge, and I was on the verge of heading back to the lab and voicing my suspicions when the door opened a crack and Faye peered out at me.
She looked terrible. Her hair was lank, her skin flushed and feverish, and she was dressed in a grubby towelling robe that she clutched at the neck when she saw it was me. Too late. I'd already seen the curve of her breast, slick with sweat.
"Jesus, are you okay?"
Faye peered at me in a strange way, as if weighing up something important. Eventually she came to a decision and opened the door properly. "Come in." Her voice was scratchy, as if from under use.
"It's not contagious," she said, understanding my reluctance, but she receded down the hallway as if she hardly cared whether I followed or not.
"How can you be sure? Have you even seen a doctor?"
Her voice floated through from the room she'd vanished into. "Just come in, and close the door behind you."
My concern for her overrode my better judgement. I followed her inside, allowing the door to swing to behind me.
I found Faye in her living room. It was an unqualified tip. She'd clearly been living in a duvet nest on her couch and the floor around it was littered with empty Irn Bru cans and discarded bags of Doritos and Haribo. A musty smell pervaded the room.
"Jesus, Faye. If you're this sick you have to be looking after yourself."
"What are you, my mum now?" She bent over the armchair next to the sofa, her wide hips and round bum framed nicely by her robe as she cleared the seat of detritus. "Sit down, eh?"
I did as I was asked, trying to ignore the fact that among the newspapers and magazines she dumped on the floor was a dildo of considerable size. Even from here I could see a long pube stuck to it. Faye disappeared for a moment then returned. She placed an unmarked bottle and two glasses on the side table between the sofa and chair.
"I'm not really sick." She uncapped the bottle and poured into the tumblers. She handed one to me.
"What's this?" The liquid was colourless and odourless.
"Homebrew." She flopped onto the couch, her robe falling away and exposing a chunky but shapely thigh. She didn't seem to notice. "I've been making homebrew." I opened my mouth but she shushed me. "I'll explain in a minute, I promise, but first we need to drink. Together, ready? One, two, three..."
My thought was to humour her. We'd been the two left standing at the end of plenty office nights out and I knew we could match each other most of the way down a tequila bottle. One shot of spirit wasn't going to kill me even at lunchtime. Together we knocked the drinks back and slammed our glasses down on the table. Faye flopped back on the couch, a smile on her lips. She watched me through slitted eyes.
I waited for the burn of the spirit to ease off so I could ask her what we were drinking, but it didn't. It grew hotter, became a pulsing heat in my chest and belly that momentarily took my breath away.
I managed to say: "Oh, that's strong stuff," then the pulsing heat exploded, rushed through me like a riptide of not just heat but unbelievable arousal. My back arched, my limbs stiffened as my body was flooded with the incredible pleasure of a colossal and instantaneous orgasm. Without even the time to gain an erection I came explosively in my pants, spurt after uncontrollable spurt of hot spunk soaking my underwear and trousers. Someone was groaning. I realised it was me.
When the onslaught began to ease off I looked across and saw that Faye was in a similar throe of ecstasy on the couch, her face beet-red and her mouth contorted in an orgasmic grimace, one hand gripping a boob that had come free of her robe, the other digging frantically between her thighs. She came down in stages, a series of mini-quakes that had to subside before she was able to talk to me.
"I can't go back to work like this." My trousers were a mess.
"Then take them off." Her hand was still cupping her cunt. I could see gentle tremors of pleasure still rippling through her.
I did so, and peeled my gluey underpants off too. "So, you're not sick."
Faye smiled dreamily and shook her head.
"You've just been..."
She nodded her head. "Getting off."
"For three weeks?"
She slipped her finger inside herself then, pulled it out and tasted it. "Can you blame me?"
"The boss is going to be mad." My confused cock had belated decided to become erect.
She shook her head. "Not when I present the company with the opportunity to licence my aphrodisiac alcohol. In a much more diluted form of course. Commercially, I think we're looking for a gentle arousal, not people cumming after only one drink."
I laughed. "So how close are you?"
"Just got a few kinks to iron out. Could use the help of a good chemist though. You in?"
I nodded, grinning. "Let's celebrate with a toast."
When Faye got up she let her bathrobe slip off. I took a moment to admire how sexy her body was. The flush still showing pink across her full boobs and belly and thighs. The rigid stiffness of her pink nipples, the matted gooeyness of her pubes. "Let's make it a large one this time." She poured two more glasses, all the way to the brim this time. Nudging one towards me she returned to her seat, picking up the dildo from the floor on the way. Spreading her legs as she eased back on the couch, she slid it deep inside herself.
"Hold on to your balls," Faye said. "Slainte." Then she knocked her drink back.
I did exactly as instructed, and got a decent grip of my erection too. Then, toasting her back, did the same.
My orgasm that time was so intense that I completely blacked out. When I awoke some indeterminable time later there was cum in my hair and up my nose. Faye was curled up on the floor, panting and spasming like a beached dolphin.
"This is going to be absolutely explosive," I said.
That was two weeks ago. I smoothed out Faye's story with our boss and then claimed to have gone down with the bug myself. We spent the next ten days working, and of course testing Faye's Aphrocol (although we hoped the marketing guys would come up with a better name than that), and now we're sitting in the work canteen at the beginning of lunch hour. It's time for a field trial.
We watch our colleagues traipse in, chatting and choosing their lunches, selecting a drink to go with them and then settling at a table. The ones we're most interested in are the ones who used the water cooler instead of canned soft drinks. Quite a few do so in the belief that it'ss good for them. They're just about to find out how good it is.
We grin at each other like naughty school k**s.
As the water drinkers start knocking the stuff back. I lean close and whisper. "So how dilute did you make it in the end?"
Faye's mouth forms an 'O' of mock surprise. "Oops," she says.
We both settle back to enjoy the show.
Story URL: http://xhamster.com/user/Kinnie/posts/120817.html