This is my blog about my time in a sex addiction rehab clinic. My husband finally caught me cheating on him and so that's where he took me. The rehab sessions didn't “cure” me and we ended up getting divorced.
August 9, 2012.
It was early afternoon yesterday and I was feeling extremely horny. Except for my husband, I hadn't been fucked for 2+ days. It was hot outside and I wasn't up to going out hunting for young boys. So I called Troy.
Troy – who is 19 – lives just a couple of blocks away and he's the boy I go to when I need a special delivery. I call him up and he comes right over and screws me good. Nothing too kinky. Just good old fashioned no-holes-barred rough sex.
Troy and I are in my front living room. We're into it for about an hour. Troy has me in the doggy and we're doing anal. Then all of a sudden the front door opens and my husband walks in and catches us red-handed.
My heart sinks and it's the worse feeling I've ever had. Troy immediately pulls out, grabs his shorts and runs naked out the side door about as fast as those Olympic sprinters.
My husband is stunned. I'm stunned too. We've been married for over 12 years and he's never come home early from work without phoning or texting me first. Well, there's a first time for everything. I've always known in the back of my mind that I shouldn't be at home when I'm cheating on my husband and that I was bound to get caught. But that was part of the excitement of it.
My husband isn't mad at me (yet). That might kick in shortly. Right now he's just shocked and disappointed. I'm very sad. Kind of sad that I got caught, but mostly sad that I can't be a faithful wife. My husband is great in bed. And I have no reason to believe that he has ever cheated on me. The only time that I know of him ever having sex with another woman was when we went together to a Nevada brothel and I watched him have kinky sex with a prostitute – and that was my idea.
I didn't tell my husband some lie about it being the first time that I had ever cheated. He has no idea about all the massive cheating I've done. And he doesn't need to know that. All he needs to know is that I've been unfaithful and something needs to be done about it.
What that something is, I don't know. Now my husband is talking about marriage counseling or going off on a vacation to talk things over. Really, I'm not exactly sure why I cheat and I don't know that I can stop it. I'm sure it's more complicated than just wanting young cock. I do know that everything is on hold for awhile until my husband and I can figure all this out and perhaps come to some accommodation.
August 26, 2012.
Tomorrow I'm checking into a southern California care facility that treats people for sexual addiction and compulsive sexual behavior. My husband will be there with me as a “supportive spouse.”
What brought this on was when my husband caught me cheating on him. I write about that in the entry just below this one. My husband tells me that if I don't attend this residential 12-step program then he will divorce me. We've been married over 12 years and I know he's not bluffing. And I hate to let the marriage end just because I'm too stubborn to attend.
But I don't think this program is going to rehabilitate me because I don't have a problem. I love having sex with others besides my husband. But it's not a compulsion. The sex with my husband is great. But it is not enough. He can't accept that.
Eventually, I think we're heading for a divorce due to “irreconcilable differences”. In a way that is too bad because one of the best things about being married to my husband is the thrill of cheating on him.
The rules at this treatment center don't allow any devices into the facility that can be used to communicate with the outside world or that can be used to watch porn. That would include cell phones and laptops. Those are “contraband”. So I'll be away from xHamster for about a month. I'll miss you all and, by all means, have fun and stay away from uptight and possessive people.
September 19, 2012
Well, I'm happy to report that I'm out of the sex addict rehab center. They couldn't “fix” me and now I'm hornier than ever.
I knew it wouldn't work and the whole thing was just a waste of time and money. After less than a week of “encounter sessions”, the leaders asked me to leave because I was a “disruption to the other recovering addicts.”
Actually, I feel quite bad for everyone. It seems that all the other men and women at the rehab center were there because they believed they had a problem. And I respect that and don't want to get in the way of their recovery. It's just that I didn't play the game at the encounter sessions because it's only my husband who thinks I have a problem with sex addiction – I don't think I have a problem.
So, anyway, the leaders told my husband and I that we had to leave the month-long treatment center early. My husband asked for his $30,000 back and they told him there would be no refund. After that, we decided to stay in seclusion at the rehab center because it is quite a nice place – luxurious and right out on the ocean and all of that. But after a couple of weeks, that got old and we decided to return to Phoenix. So that's where we are now.
My husband and I did accomplish one thing during our stay at the center. We have come to the conclusion that there should be a divorce. Now he knows that I can't just be faithful to him and that's not something that he can live with.
Next week my husband will be filing divorce papers. Before the divorce is final (maybe in 4 months) my husband still wants to live with me. Partly, so he can save on rent money. But he also wants my pussy during that time. I'm more than happy to give him my pussy until our divorce is final. But he won't be the only one getting it.
My husband is going to shack up in our guest bedroom and I'll be bringing home boys anytime I feel like it and have sex with them. This will all happen right in front of my husband. What's he going to do? Divorce me and move out? I'm not really into the cock-old thing because I still love my husband. But it will be delicious torture to fool around in front of him.
Oh, one more thing. I'm still fertile and I want a baby. My husband has a medical condition that means a low sperm count. So up until now, getting pregnant hasn't been possible. Now I want to find a sperm stud and copulate with him non-stop for a week so he can knock me up.