My name is Ivy. That's not my real name, but that's another story. I'm 20 years old and this is my journal. There was an apocalypse and most of the civilization fell victim to this terrible disease. I was one of those who were punished by surviving. For a long time I though I'm the only survivor...

The Beginning
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War is hell, but this was worse even more as it happened on frigging Christmas. They were walking EVERYWHERE and I just couldn't leave my home. When I ran out of food the hunger drew me out. The city was in chaos and the only solution was to hop on my motorbike and ride to downtown mall hoping that it was closed on Christmas and free of the dead.

I barely escaped them and there they are banging on the doors. I managed to break in through one of the service doors. Searching through the whole mall took me most of the day and night but it seemed like I was lucky.

I spent a few days barricading the doors and windows when the depression suddenly hit me. I was sure I was the only survivor as I didn't see anyone living for days. Then I realized I could live my fantasy and nobody will be able to judge me.

The first thing I did was to run to the Internet cafe where I spent the afternoon researching. When I finally broke into the d**gstore finding the right medications were a breeze. Two fuckin' full boxes of them. Maybe I was luck and maybe it was fate that I managed to find it, but that was the moment when I began my own hormone replacement therapy on my way turning into a woman in a world infested with living dead.

The night was full of dreams and my fantasies were back. There was finally a reason to struggle and stay alive...

Day 1 (as a woman)
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I got rid of my clothes first in the morning and ran naked over to a beauty and spa saloon. I took a bath there and shaved all the hair from my legs, crotch, and ass and took a bath.

The next stop was an underwear store. There I have chosen a pair of tiny pink thongs. Then I went to a popular youth fashion store where I selected the rest of my girly outfit. My legs got a pair of white thigh-high socks with two little pink bows on their side. Over that went a short tutu-like skirt and a white t-shirt. It was quite simple but I felt very sexy and pretty. And that turned me on.

This was not my first time in female clothes but I was always hiding and had to be fast. This time I had all the time on the world. I went to the sex-shop that was tucked away in the basement and selected a dildo for myself. I always wanted to try that and never really had the opportunity.

Then I went back to the furniture department where I took residence, laid down on a back, and pulled aside my thongs. My dick was already hard from the mere idea of having anything similar to a cock in my ass. At first I was only sucking on the dildo while my dick was throbbing and about to explode.

Then I put some lube on the dildo and slowly started playing with it around my anus. I couldn't wait for long so I slowly tried to push it in. My first choice might have been a bit rushed as it seemed like it is too big for my ass. But I didn't give up. I pushed the tip a few times in and pulled it out. Slowly I was able to relax my anus and stretch it enough to push the dildo all the way in.

I was lying on my back with my legs in the air. This was my first anal experience and it surprised me that I lost the erection even though I was just about to cum. And I came hard filling the thongs with my warm cum. The feeling was different and exceptional and the orgasm lasted a lot longer.

I was there lying for a couple of minutes with the dildo still in my ass when I started feeling bad. What have I done? Can this be right? I felt strong guilt and did not know what to do. I pulled the dildo out of my ass that was hurting a bit. There was cum smeared all over the inside of my nice pink thongs. I felt awful. Like a slut.

I walked around the mall aimlessly for some time thinking about what should I do. Suddenly I knew I would get some kind of a punishment if anyone else would be still alive. That was right - I needed a punishment.

I quickly went over to the kitchen department and found some large wooden spoons. I wanted to humiliate myself and punish so I don't repeat this mistake again. I stripped all clothes off me and put my cum smeared thongs into my mouth. The mere idea of cum in my mouth, or any other, was disgusting for me. It was quite hard to f***e myself to open my mouth and push the thongs inside but I did it. I can't even imagine the grimace on my face when I felt the disgusting taste of semen on my tongue. But I endured and bent over a table.

I spanked my ass with the wooden spoon until I started crying and even a light touch with the spoon on my ass was too much pain. I stood up and found a mirror to look at my ass. It was all pink with some white areas. I couldn't even think of sitting down on it. That was a punishment I have deserved.

I went to sl**p naked that night and spent the night sl**ping on my tummy. This was the first night that I didn't hear any zombie bastard banging on the barricaded doors. Maybe they died from hunger? Maybe they gave up? It was the first night in two weeks when I finally got some proper sl**p...

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