Joke for today

Signs That You Might Need A New Lawyer

* During the trial, you catch him playing his Gameboy.

* Every couple of minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniel's to the stand!" and proceeds to drink a shot.

* He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.

* He begins closing arguments with, "As Ally McBeal once said ..."

* Just before trial starts he whispers, "The judge is the one with the little hammer, right?"

* Just before he says "Your Honor," he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.

* The sign in front of his law office reads "Practicing Law Since 2:25 PM."

* Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever."

* He giggles every time he hears the word "briefs."

* Giggles hysterically at the mere mention of the Penal Code.

* Constantly raising objections to the "vibes" he's getting from the jury.

* Every time the judge sustains one of his objections, he screams, "Yahtzee!"

* Offers to waive his usual fees in exchange for your panties.

* You met him in prison.

* He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.

* When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

* He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

* He asks a hostile witness to "pull my finger."

* A prison guard is shaving your head.
100% (8/0)
 
Categories: Celebrities
Posted by cocoabutter
4 years ago    Views: 925
Comments (7)
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4 years ago
if hes from the law firm of: Dewey, Fookyou and Howe. or Loveum, Burnem and Ruyn.
4 years ago
Law firm name: Dewey Cheatum & Howe
4 years ago
Meeting your lawyer in prison AFTER a trial would be cool... ( shanky mcShank shank...)
4 years ago
The prosecutors high fiving each other.... thats a real bad sign indeed.
4 years ago
great stuff:0
4 years ago
any of those you know your screwed
4 years ago
thats hilarious