My Death (The Prequel)
I never heard the round that day that slammed into my chest.
I felt the icy pain take hold as it totally missed my vest.
Slapped right down upon the rocks as I rolled up off my side.
I couldn't get up off that field no matter how hard I tried.
I feel the bl**d loss draining me, seconds before I die.
The scent of cordite lingered about as I looked up in the sky.
Lazy clouds dot my perception, drifting in a cobalt blue,
my armor and gear weighed me down as I appreciated the view.
Knowing that it would happen this way but I never knew just when.
I'm just glad I have the moments to enjoy this perfect Zen.
I think back about my deeds and ask God to forgive my soul.
I've done good and bad and pray that I'm judged as a whole.
Now I struggle against my gear and I start to feel the chill.
Living a life of uniformed service but always seeking the thrill.
I knew one day this would happen and this day would eventually come.
Now I'm fucking freezing here while I bake in the Afghan Sun.
I hear the ringing in my ears but not from the explosions nearby.
This must be the Sound of Death and I know that I'm going to die.
My head lay back within my Kevlar while I’m helpless on the ground.
I lost my strength to lift it up for it feels like fifty pounds.
My body grows numb; my heart slows down the beats easing with time.
I sense the release is right at hand and I’ll hear the Reaper’s chime.
With so much guilt and so much remorse, I never did apologize.
I never really took the time to tell all my friends goodbye.
My breathing became shallower and I know; it’s happening now.
I'm so scared but still serene as sweat trickled on my brow.
My vision starts to blur real bad and my eyelids are heavy to lift.
I sense the feeling like I'm flying; up high and adrift.
I can feel the cold gripping my soul as I thought in my head.
I imagine my body laying there pumping a pool of red.
This is it; I'm right here, take me along this track.
Then I slip into the Void and my world goes finally black.
I heard old friends calling me and loved ones whispered my name.
I was held in a soothing light but it exposed my shame.
I heard those voices changing to screams and then I suddenly fell,
Then I heard crying ahead and knew I was falling to Hell.
I saw faces from my past and the people I’ve robbed of life,
with all the drama, and all my sins laced with hate and strife.
I screamed aloud into the dark that I’d do it all again.
I did what I did with few regrets from the present to way back then.
I did what I had to do and succeeded with a little luck.
“So go ahead and do what you want because I don’t give a fuck!”
A booming voice laughed at that and told me to stand with pride.
I got up from off my knees for I had nothing left to hide.
I could smell the sulfur burning about as a voice boomed back at me.
“You are unholy and impure and you are of the Demon Seed.”
“You’ve been selected from the few to lead the Army of the Damned.”
“You will collect the souls that I desire throughout this barren land.”
I didn’t feel the pain no more, nor did I feel the heat.
I began to feel stronger again and I didn’t feel as weak.
My armored clothing began to morph, from tan to a crimson red.
I had visions of my role in life with no confusion in my head.
I felt a strength course through my veins as my skin grew cold as ice.
I felt His hand within my heart as he explained his terrible price.
“You will be denied all known happiness as you walk among good Men.”
“You have one mission on this Earth and that’s to collect the souls I pen.”
“In good time, you will heal, and you’ll work as a Dog of War.”
“Men grow impatient everyday and you’ll fight again once more.”
“During that time, you’ll grow strong and gain invaluable skill.”
“Mankind’s destiny will grow black again once I impose my will.”
“I can see your blackened soul; I already picked you apart.”
“I can see what you have done and know your soulless heart.”
“I know that you’ve enjoyed the hunt to kill your fellow man.”
“So it isn’t asking much of you and you will serve my plan.”
I just stood there mesmerized as I began to nod my head.
I felt His power over me and there was nothing to be said.
Now I felt weak and dizzy with the bullet still in my side.
The pain was searing once again as I screamed out and cried.
I can’t say what happened next, it blurred by so fast.
All I know is that it was real and the evil die was cast.
I heard someone screaming again as I felt cold inside.
I woke up to a horrible pain and a medic by my side.
Years has passed since that day but when I close my eyes,
I remember that day with clarity when I was about to die.
He was right that I’d have no joy or happiness in my days,
I know one thing and know it well and know when I’ve been played.
I’ve gone back so many times and did my job for Him.
I went back as a Dog of War and The Earth has started to dim.
I know well that I’ll grow old but he’ll never set me free.
I have no joy within my life as I complete His destiny.
When you listen to the news and hear the stories of strife.
Remember this poem and its tale and ponder the meaning of life.
Think you know the price of things when you’ve never paid the bill?
All your comforts were previously paid by those with strength of will.
Cherish the ones you love today, hold them to your heart.
Tell them you love them very much and never drift apart.
Here’s the moral to this poem in case you were wondering why?
Cherish the time with the ones you love and avoid a fate like mine.