I'm gonna be 30! D:
(1 month ago)
Signed up:1406 days ago
Last Activity:4 hours ago
Profile Viewed:6,104 times
Rank:Kama Sutra Guru
From:United States
Personal Information
Kids:No, but may be want some
Education:Some college
Star sign:Sagittarius
Physical Information
Body type:Average
Height:6 ft 2 in (188 cm)
Hair length:Short
Hair color:Brown
Eye color:Blue
About Me
UPDATE 11/2014

Not very much has changed, but my profile felt old.

I guess it's never too late to discover things about yourself, huh. Yeah, I have a lot of incesty videos in my favorites. I was sort of self-conscious about those, actually. Like, I have no sexual attraction to any of my family members at all. Fucking gross, man. I don't know, it's the taboo, I guess. Sue me.

Seems like people aren't as social on here anymore. I don't know. Depressing.


All right, guys, let's have a little primer. I realize that the anonymity of the internet is a heady, envigorating thing. What do you have to lose, right?

Let's get real.

You can be sexual, even be here strictly FOR sex, and still be relatively non-disgusting. You can still post your reasonably nauseating slimy dick pictures in your own profile, stick dildos and hairbrushes wherever you want, fuck your furniture, whatever.

But let me tell you this: there is not a woman alive who is turned on by an unsolicted picture of your hairy, gaping asshole or you wearing your wife's lingerie, delivered with no warning to their comment box. So for the love of GOD, please spare them - and by proxy, me - from having to see it, by keeping it confined to your own page.

And, contrary to the impression I'm giving, I don't think I'm that smooth or efficient with the ladies, myself. I don't think I'm better than you. But for the love of fuck, if I can come up with a comment more interesting than "Nice tits" or "I want to lick your cunt", you sure as hell can too.

Start thinking with your heads and not your dicks, please, because the amount of sheer, unadultered stupidity I see on a day-to-day basis is starting to make me feel like I'm doing to suffer an aneurysm.

Also, if you actually READ their "About Me", you might successfully fool them into thinking you're not as shockingly typical as you are. IN FACT, maybe you could actually read the whole profile and FIND OUT if you have anything in common, in terms of sexuality, before simply exposing the poor woman to something that is likely to make her want to detach her own retinae with a staple remover. Just a thought.


NOW, on to the stuff about me.

First and foremost, I love to write fiction. Naturally, erotic fiction is right up there on the list. I'll get some stories up here before too long.

Before you ask, no, I don't have any weird fetishes about judging, or about the dead, or anything of the like. I simply find the story of Rhadmanthus to be interesting and... worth a read! I certainly don't have any delusions about godhood, and no, it's not my real name. I can't imagine I'd have made it through middle school alive sporting a name like that.

That said...

I think most people would frown on my methods of meeting people. Heh.

I can't help it, though. People fascinate me, and so I drift around from site to site and see what I can unearth.

I've never been a member of a porn site before, but... well, here's to trying something new! I'm straight, and not extremely curious... just prefer the ladies all around. Sorry, guys.

Ahhh, all right, you want more info? Here goes. I've never really classified myself as "into BDSM". I'm not a huge fan of whips and chains and ball gags. But, as you can see from the stories I write, I am at least somewhat interested in exploring the submission of the (human) female. I don't think it's about control for me, so much as it's about trust and... exploring deeply, shall we say? People put up walls. I like to see what's behind them.

That said, I'm not going to try and "break you down" or make you submit to me, or something crazy like that. It doesn't color my interaction. I love an aggressive or independent female just as much. The only reason I tend to explore on the dominant side of things is that dominant women have a tendency to want to jam things into your ass right away or make you wear leather hoods, and that's just not me. Okay?

That's about it.
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1 month ago
I would say I want what you're on, but gasoline sounds like it comes with a gnarly hangover and I'm too old for that shit. ;)
1 month ago
"likely to make her want to detach her own retinae with a staple remover". lmao. I missed you a ton.
2 months ago
yes hobbits. ok so i promise not to make you wear a leather hood (at first i thought you wrote rubber boots, i thought who the fekk gets a guy to wear rubber boots, then i read your profile with my eyes WORKING the second time round and i realised it said a leather hood). beep beep!
7 months ago
7 months ago
I'm not sure I like you talking about my friend that way.
7 months ago
him, not you
7 months ago
I never lie.
7 months ago
lying sob.
7 months ago
Yeah he mentioned that. Said you were super grossed out by him and made him feel really bad.
7 months ago
a tree frog called me. said he wanted you to take him as your pet. something about it being tough out there in nature for him, hard for him to make friends.
8 months ago
what's up fellllla
8 months ago
1 year ago
Lol thank you. Does this include massages? Because I started working out again and it fucking hurts. :'(
1 year ago
and thank you. :)
1 year ago
1 year ago
Yeah, THEN you'll be old balls. Definitely.

I turn 25 in less than two months. A whole goddamn quarter of a century.
1 year ago
haha sooo dramatic. happy birthday to you!
1 year ago
long timeee. merry early christmas, dear.
1 year ago
Scottie, you are alive!
1 year ago
Thanks, sweet pea. :) I hope you are doing wellll.
2 years ago
haha you're the only one i'd accept such awful jokes from. ;)
2 years ago
Why the sad faaace?
2 years ago
Oh my goddd. I've only ever been to the airport in Denver, on my way to New Orleans for Halloween, but it was ridiculously fucking cold. I am not cut out for that bullshit. ;)
2 years ago
So does the propensity to break a hip!
2 years ago
I don't know if you could handle all of this, old man.
2 years ago
ahaha. Very clever. ;)
2 years ago
Nah, you need a little excitement!!
2 years ago
Bummer!!! :(
2 years ago
Unlikely. I don't think you find cleaning clutter especially thrilling. ;)
2 years ago
Successfully escaped groping.. not so much the getting too intoxicated part though. WHOMP WHOMP.

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