Well after I looked at it for awhile I decided that this series really needed a rewrite. So here yah go :)
Lyrics to Magnet
The lights go dark and as you walk off stage you are immediately engulfed in praises and congratulations from your co-workers. Though some are strange you love these people, they are like your f****y and one of them will forever mean more to you than that.
As if on cue that one person comes out of the back dressed in a familiar costume and already your heart clenches in fear. She is clad in an elegant black dress that reaches her knees with white fringe at the bottom and black fingerless gloves that reach to her elbows. Pink thigh high stockings accompany one side of a butterfly colored in your signature pink as well. The teal girl' figure is petite – delicate even – but highly toned due to her dancing. The black dress hugs her slim waist and brings out the curves of her hips and small, perky breasts. Her face is just as delicate and a smile always seems to grace those beautiful pale lips. However you have caught the times that pain clouds the usually bright teal eyes behind a false face.
You start to hear the chanting voices of the crowd and for that one song, it feels almost like they are chanting for your death. You look desperately to Haku a silver haired woman that is the only one to know your perverted feelings; because she is in love with a person she may never have as well. A blonde woman named Neru who seemed far more interested in her cell phone than Haku. The silver haired Vocaloid just gives you a sad shake of her head and turns away, knowing what agony you will be in.
You sigh, giving up, and head to your dressing room where the couch will soon become your best friend. With each part of clothing you put on, your mind fires off ten questions and they are all the same. 'Why am I doing this?' And for the sanity of you, which you feel you lost quite awhile ago, you can't answer this simple question. Why are you doing this? You could simply refuse or say that you are sick or make some kind of excuse.
But you don't, and you hate yourself for it. You know why you sing this tortuous song, you know why you gladly sing an encore which only doubles your pain.
Because it will be the closest thing you ever hear to the teal haired girl returning your sinful feelings.
You exit the room and join your love just behind the stage. You are dressed much like she is only your side of the butterfly and stockings are her teal. She turns to you and gives a smile that both warms your heart and tears at your conscious. You try to smile back and succeed but only barely. Another singer approaches behind you; a purple haired man by the name of Gakupo. He wraps an arm around your waist and wishes you good luck on stage. You could have sworn that you saw jealousy in the teal' eyes for a sliver of a second. You escape his touch and step closer to the teal girl, u*********sly reaching to grasp her hand seeking some form of comfort. The feeling of your intertwined fingers feels so right. Your hand doesn't overshadow but simply cradles her slightly smaller hand, and hers do the same for your own. You don't like that man because he does not know the word no and always tries to flirt with you. Your heart tells you, you would far rather feel the touch of your teal haired love; only to be reprimanded by your mind and telling you 'that's wrong.'
As the lights go dark again anxiety starts to make a pit in your stomach, the pain when singing this song had grown tremendously the last few times and now it hurt so much you can barely breath after you're done. The teal gives your hand a reassuring squeeze. You wonder for a moment if she sensed your fear, but can't dwell on it long as you are pushed on stage and you pull your hands apart, setting yourselves in the starting positions.
As the quiet, gentle notes leading into the explosive intro begin to flow through the air, again your stomach tightens and fear grabs your heart. 'How much is it going to hurt? Can I make it through the whole song? Yes, I must if only to hear the false words of love leave her lips, I can endure.' You move through the dance as if it were second nature and then she began her unknowing torture.
Deep within my heart, I felt the spark to start a fire inside.
Soon before I knew it burned and left me with no place to hide.
Wandering wings so tired, gentle, calm, and yet so beautiful,
Are consumed in flames but its still, so wonderful.
Her voice is melodic, angelic, and calm. Yet there is an underlying tone of sadness and; regret? Why would your little tealette be feeling regret? Her movements are graceful almost as if she were floating, moving to the words in a way that expressed great sadness. Much like you do, 'could she . . .?' A pain shoots directly in the center of your heart and you almost lose your breath. 'Damn, I hate being right' The pain is more intense then any other time before, and this is just the beginning.
As the teal finishes her part, your voice joins hers and the most perfect harmony is created.
Wrapped around your finger from the lips to tongue.
And I know they still think we're too young.
Tangled up inside these beautiful chains,
I know myself, but I feel barely sane.
The pain increases even more as those words of love fall from the cyan haired girl' lips, you know they will never be true. You will never be able to hold her at night while sharing a goodnight kiss. You will never be able to hug her from behind and proclaim the only words that could ever describe how much she means to you. You must resist the urge to clutch at your crying heart and join it in releasing your pain.
I want to drown in your embrace,
I want to live to see your face,
Gazing back at me, with those loving eyes, and I want you to
Softy call my name, I can tolerate the pain
Please just know that you are what I want,
And I know that's not a mistake.
A mistake. You have been questioned why you chose that word instead of any other to describe being wrong. It's because the word “mistake” means more than just being wrong or a wrong doing. The word “mistake” entails that the action should never have happened. Not being a mistake means that weather or not it is deemed wrong by society, f****y, friends, or anyone; it is still right in the eyes of the person. To you, loving her is not a mistake even if the whole world disagrees.
Every moment I find it gets harder to restrain desire
This is love so look upon it, watch as my small flame grows higher.
Soon that feeling so unknown, has spread without and grown and grown
It becomes a burning longing, sweet belonging.
You remember the first time you admitted to being in love with Miku out loud. It was the time when Haku told you she loved Neru. It had come as an enormous shock that someone else had these feelings. So much so that at first you didn't say anything but when Haku started to cry and apologize, joy and relief filled your heart and you proclaimed your forbidden feelings as well. You both had become good friends due to the mutual understanding and anytime the other needed a place to talk or cry, the other' door was always open. After that something terrible happened to you.
You gained the slightest amount of hope, but when Miku went right back to Kaito your growing desires and hope went right with her. Ripped away from you. You cried yourself to sl**p in Haku's arms that night and many others to come.
If even if I say I want to stray, I don't mean it.
I am always drawn like a magnet.
Right back to you, I will run and start to cry
I don't know why, but I will till I die.
You feel something akin to a sob almost tear itself from your throat at the implications of Miku' line. Still moving through the motions of your tragic ballet with the teal haired Diva you have to remind yourself you're still on stage, there are still people watching. Despite the constant times of your hope being taken and the continuous reassurances that Miku feels nothing for you, you can't help but cry at the unfairness of it all. Even if Miku loved you, she could never show it due to her status as a role model. Even if she loved you, she couldn't show it due to her f****y' religious views. It's not fair.
You allow your anger to seep into your voice and you sing a bit louder, a bit more passionate. This world and its' rules may have caused you to contain your unbearable feelings but it can never make them go away. It can never make them change, never take away the happiness you feel when you are able to cradle Miku' hand in your own, your fingers intertwined.
There is no happiness but this,
Hanging on a very kiss,
Dreaming of a day, we will never see,
And reality pulls us back again.
Even if I'm just a friend,
I will follow you till the very end,
To the end of eternity!
During the bridge is when you are able to glance at Miku for a bit longer. Though she is not looking at you and she is a distance away, you can still see that her eyes have darkened. They are now a deep blue and a sort of stormy anger mixed with sadness. Though you are the only one to know the tealette well enough to see this change, you wounder why it happened. Miku seems to be almost glaring forward and you immediately don't like that expression on your teal love' face.
You are broken out of your love sick thoughts when she closes her eyes and continues singing. Her voice seemed to have gained a tinge of anger as well.
Anxiety arrives with dawn to find my tears,
When you whispered to me its okay dear.
Did I hear a quiver when I heard you say
Just don't look back, cause this was no mistake?
You decide to take your own advice to Miku in the song and just act. Do without thinking and don't regret. Turning off your constant thoughts of Miku and rather focus on your constant feelings for the teal haired girl. Releasing all the pain, all the sorrow, and all of the pure feeling from within your heart and simply letting them go; all that you have left to sing with is love. It didn't matter what would happen after when the people would surely figure out your true desires. For now all you could do is allow the pure untainted feeling to permeate your voice and spill your soul out to the one you love.
I want to drown in your embrace,
I want to live to see your face,
Gazing back at me, with those loving eyes, and I want you to
Softy call my name, I can tolerate the pain.
Please just know that you are what I want,
And I know there's
No happiness but this,
Hanging on a very kiss
Dreaming of a day,
I can almost see.
But I know that we
We cant go back again,
And it may be a sin, but loving you, touching you,
Is all I could ever want!
Once again the gentle notes ring through out the stage and the lights darken signaling the end of the song. But there is no applause, the audience is left stunned until cheers vibrate the walls. You hope Miku now understands. Understands that the attraction described in Magnet is real, that you do love her with all of your heart.
But as you both exit the stage and you see Kaito giving Miku a congratulatory kiss something inside of you breaks. Your heart stops, your vision blurs, there is an unbearable weight on your chest and you can barely breathe. You half stumble, half sprint to your dressing room, throw on clothes and make your way to the parking lot. Miku stops you on the way and asks if you want to go celebrate. You are glad your face doesn't show the breakdown currently happening and choke out “I'm not feeling well” before breaking free of her grasp and continuing home.
Once there you throw yourself onto the couch. You bury your head into the pillow and scream. You scream out your breaking heart, your disappearing mind, and your dying soul. You scream until your voice is gone and because you know of nothing else to do. You curl into the fetal position and you silently sob, hoping that maybe being curled into ball with stop your heart from shattering. Hot tears flow down your flushed cheeks, giving a physical form for the aching, grasping, crushing, sorrow in your chest. The tears don't stop for awhile and even some of your pink hair is wet.
Now you are numb. You released every emotion you ever contained and now you are left with nothing. Uncurling yourself from your position and grabbing a pen and paper, you begin to write out your last goodbyes . . .
If loving her is a sin, then . . .
I will bath in it.
I will reject Heaven.
I will fight God alone at the gates of hell to my very last breath to protect her.
If loving her is an abomination then . . .
I am the most vile creature to live.
I deserve all the disgust, especially from her.
If loving her is a mistake then . . .
I will be forever wrong.
I can no longer fight this desire.
I can no longer handle the wanting glances you never notice.
I can no longer understand how I can say I love you, yet I hide it like I don't.
I love you Hatsune Miku.
I love you my tealette.
I love you Koishii.
I am going to my Tower.
I am going to the only place as beautiful as you.
I love you, Miku.
I'm sorry I never said it.
Tears stained the pink haired woman's flushed cheeks as she finished her good bye note. 'It's what's best,' she thought. 'I would only complicate her life if she were to know my feelings and I were to stay.' Walking slowly to the only place that could barely compare to her secret love, she thought of the memory of when her unexpected torture began.
Luka walked apprehensively to her manager's office. She had a good reason to be. This would be the first time she would get to meet the most popular of all Vocaloids.
The very name made Luka's heart race. She knew the girl's personality, she knew her looks, she knew her voice. Yet there was something still missing. When she opened the door and twin-tails of teal hair swirled around to meet her gaze, she knew nothing of the princess standing in front of her.
The princess smiled at her and Luka's heart went from thundering in her chest to having gone still. The radiance of the being in front of the older woman, the energy, the brilliance of her smile, left Luka stunned, absolutely sure she was dreaming.
Then she spoke. "Hi, I'm Hatsune Miku. Nice to finally meet you," she said, giving a small bow.
Luka smiled sadly at the memory. She had been left dumbfounded by Miku's very presence and, to this day, the effect had never faded. Miku's presence always managed to make her mood brighter, no matter what happened before. There was a time when Luka had thought Miku returned her feelings. During the Magnet project Miku would sing with such passion that it seemed the feelings were real, but after the recording and mixing were done she went right back to Kaito. Now, when they sang it on stage, it took everything Luka had to wait until she got home to cry, because every word was true. Though it hurt immensely to sing it, every time the crowd would call for an encore of Magnet, she would ask Miku to sing it one more time. It was the only time she could openly express her feelings to Miku and she could hear the younger woman return them.
The older Diva arrived at the Tower. Looking up and smiling sadly, she made her way to the top. Luka had figured love was difficult to handle, but crying herself to sl**p every night as she clutched at her aching heart was more than she ever thought it would be . . .
A young, s*******n-year-old teal-haired idol made her way to her older pink-haired friend's apartment. Miku had noticed Luka's mood change lately, and it made the young woman sad that no one else noticed or that they simply ignored it. Luka had been avoiding the teal-haired girl and even refusing to sing Magnet with her lately when usually the tall Diva would jump at the chance. Though Luka had sung Magnet tonight, it hurt Miku when she would turn down the crowds cheers for the only song the teal woman could use to express her true feelings.
She loved Luka.
Completely, fully, unconditionally.
Everything Miku loved about Luka had nothing to do with her looks, though if she were being truthful, she would be the first to admit that Luka was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. She was tall – at least half a head taller than Miku – with wavy pink hair that hung down to her very toned waist. Wide hips, long legs, bright blue eyes that held only care but never malice, and a very well graced chest made Luka gorgeous beyond any goddess. However it was not just the physical that attracted Miku to Luka. The pink-haired woman was kind, smart, and the best singer of their make-shift f****y. Everything the teal woman could say was expressed in Magnet. Even the title was true. Luka was just magnetic to Miku. She always wanted to be near her, always wanted to just be with her.
Miku's thoughts were interrupted when she knocked at Luka's door, but she received no answer. 'I thought she was home? Didn't Luka say she wasn't feeling well? That's why she didn't come karaoke singing with us.'
Trying the knob, Miku was surprised to find that the door was open. Letting herself in, Miku scanned the living room – lit only by the light of the moon. Her eyes landed on a single sheet of paper, neatly folded and addressed to her. Cautiously she moved to the paper and opened it . . .
Once again, tears silently stained Luka's cheeks as she turned away right after seeing a happy couple kiss on top of the tower. She had decided to wait until the deck was empty of on lookers to perform her sinful deed. The cold wind chilled her face and she shivered, though that coldness could never compare to what was in heart. The pink haired woman looked out over the city, though it was late the beautifully lit city was still very alive.
So many happy people, so many happy couples giving their lover a kiss goodnight. Her heart beat painfully in her chest at that thought. As she saw the couple begin to leave, the pink haired woman steeled herself and approached the railing . . .
Miku dropped to her knees as her heart cried out in agony but not a sound escaped her lips.
Luka . . .
Luka was going to . . .
A sob escaped her throat as she started to tremble and feel sick.
Luka loved her too. Loved her as much as she loved Luka. But it was too late.
A ray of hope shone in her heart as a thought occurred. 'How come no one has been notified? Surely the police would tell us first. Surely they would find her body right away.' But she hadn't yet heard from anyone.
Miku jumped up, her heart thundering in her chest and adrenaline roaring in her veins, and she tore off to the Tower. 'Please, please God let me be in time,' Tears streamed down her face, her lungs burning for the oxygen that the woman didn't have time to capture, legs screaming in pain, telling her body to stop. The thought of stopping only made her mind push forward even more. Her body complied, but her muscles burned in agony, one thought running in her head:
'I can't let this happen. No, No NO!'
Pushing her body even harder and refusing to stop for even a second, she arrived at the bottom of the Tower just in time to see a couple getting off the elevator. Though it killed Miku to stand and wait, she couldn't deny that it was the fastest option. The whole ride up her body trembled. Tears continued to run down her flushed cheeks, and she panted, ready to throw up, from both her run and the fear of being too late.
Luka stepped over the railing, and looked down at the passing people. Steeling herself one last time, she closed her eyes and said her sin one last time.
Good-Bye, Miku. I love you.
After an eternity of waiting, Miku arrived at the top and saw her pink goddess murmuring her last good-bye. With the remaining oxygen in her burning lungs the teal girl cried out to her love, "Luka, STOP!"
The pink haired woman didn't have time to register anything before a teal blur wrapped its' arms around her waist and yanked her over the rail and to the floor of the deck. Covering Luka's body with her own as if to protect her from anything more. Miku captured Luka' lips in an embrace, the two years of pent up love Miku poured into the kiss had shocked the poor pink haired woman even more.
The shock wore off as soon as it had come, though, quickly wrapping her arms around the younger woman's shoulders, clutching her tightly she kissed back with as much love as the teal girl. The kiss was chaste but fierce and passionate, their bodies molding into one as their hearts merged as well. The feeling of Miku' lips against hers didn't feel like a sin. Not anywhere near wrong but rather oh so very, very right. The teal girl' lips were impossibly soft and warm. Neither of their lips overlapped the other but rather molded together to hold the contact that should have happened two years ago.
When they did break apart, Miku saw Luka's face was stained with tears. "I'm sorry," she choked out. Miku lay her chin on Luka's shoulder, drained from the ordeal, and gazed into the teal eyes – much like her own – that held both love and regret. The younger woman reached down and clasped Luka's hand in her own, entwining their fingers, while the other reached up and stroked her love's cheek, wiping the tears away. "I love you, Luka."
The pink woman sobbed again and used her remaining arm to clutch Miku tighter around her waist. She leaned forward and rested her forehead against the teal woman's and returned the sentiment the best way she knew. She placed a gentle yet firm kiss to the teal's lips, saying everything that couldn't be expressed in words. Her love was conveyed in her burning eyes and searing kiss.
Luka d****d her head back down and happily ran her hands through the teal locks. A contented sigh escaped her lips. Miku listened to Luka's heart; both hers and Luka's were singing the same song.
They had found their savior.
A/N I do have ideas for an epilogue but I haven't even started on it.