KarlVonWillebrand's Blog

Jim

Jim is a new character I just thought of today, but I warn you – don't get too used to him. Don't try to get to know him, don't try to like him, because I'm gonna kill him. That is what I do. I invent people, and then I kill them.

Jim walks with a limp, but don't worry about it. It doesn't matter that he does, and it doesn't matter why, because he's going to die.

Okay, he was bit by a dog last week, that's why he limps. Okay? And it wasn't his fault at all. Nor is it his fault that he will die. He will die because he had the poor sense to be invented by me. He doesn't deserve to die.
... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 3 years ago  |  3

Dating Profile: Bert



Name: Bert

Location: Sesame Street

Sex: M?

Favorite Fruit:
Limes

Occupation:
Teaching k**s how to clean up after themselves and being angry.

Favorite Movies:
Reservoir Dogs, A Fist Full of Dollars and Thelma & Louise

Hobbies:
Discussions about Minorities, Amateur Aviation and depression.

What I do for fun:
I like to stand under the shower when you turn it off. As the water pressure lessens the remaining water dribbles out like your being pissed on by a giant or a horse.

About Me: Greetings,... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 3 years ago  |  4

A Good Attitude Towards Menstruation



Hi, my name's Karl, and something you might not know about me is that... I have a good attitude towards menstruation. That's right, I'm the guy! The guy with a good attitude towards menstruation!
Oh, I know a lot of men are made uncomfortable by this monthly miracle. But not me. No, I embrace it. Embrace it the way the way some men embrace the weekend! Why, I anticipate it the way a c***d anticipates Christmas!

Did you know that, uh, in alot of native Indian cultures, m... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 3 years ago  |  12

T'ain't no sin

When you hear sweet syncopation
And the music softly moans
T'ain't no sin to take off your skin
And dance around in your bones



When it gets too hot for comfort
And you can't get an ice cream cone
T'ain't no sin to take off your skin
And dance around your bones

[image]http://mle... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  3

Revolution!

Come on everybody now you got to understand,
In these times of revolution now you gotta be a revolutionary man,
Wait a second, people, now, you got to get a plan,
We're gonna have a revolution and we don't even need to know why,
b*****rs, s****rs too,
Revolution...don't know what to do, yeah!

Come on everybody now, you got to get a life, ya,
In these times of revolution, and you must be prepared to die,
But wait a second people, don't you think its got a little out of hand,
In these times of counter-revolution you're gonna encounter
a counter-revolutionary ... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  3

Happy the Golden Prince

Twenty-five hours of love in the life of "Happy the Golden Prince Rides Again"

His sluggish purple crest flopping over his dotty eyes as he casts a revolting shadow over the courtyard.For many years he had played by himself in the vaults and turrets of his father's castle, occasionally drawing back the musty curtains of burgundy red that masked him from the challenging sun or the ovulating moon. He would lurch past the flies on the windowsill like a figurehead through a bag of dust, tip over the battlements and cough himself rigid until white tears tumbled sluggishly from th... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  4

[Story] Be My Girl

I was blue and lonely,
I couldn’t sl**p a wink
And I could only get u*********s
If I’d had to much to drink

There was somehow, something wrong somewhere,
And each day seemed grey and dead
The seeds of desperation
Were growing in my head

I needed inspiration,
A brand new start in life,
Somewhere to place affection,
But I didn’t want a wife

And then by lucky chance I saw
In a special magazine
An ad that was unusual,
The like I’d never seen,

’experience something different
With our new imported toy,
She’s loving, warm, inflatible
And... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  4

Futanari Gifs




[image]http://hentai-wa... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  28

Make friends with the badger.


Out in the woods
Up to no good
I wanna make friends with the badger

The woodchuck likes me
We smoke PCP
I wanna make friends with the badger
I mean it!
I wanna make friends with the badger
For real!
I wanna make friends with the
Wanna make friends with the
Wanna make friends with the badger

Get d***k with owls
Drop acid with cows
I wanna make friends with the badger

I'll stand on my head ti... Continue»
Posted by KarlVonWillebrand 4 years ago  |  15
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