If Men Wrote Problem Pages...

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.
A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day; then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.
A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The Man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.
A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing - your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.
A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sl**p without giving me one.
A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.
23% (8/26)
Categories: Sex Humor
Posted by Jim-Nice-But-Dim
2 years ago    Views: 2,522
Comments (11)
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3 months ago
i think some just dont have a sense of humour
3 months ago
Quite funny! Liked.

I don't understand the low rating. Did those people just skim over it or maybe couldn't read and didn't understand it. Maybe they haven't had experience with a relationship with the opposite sex yet or they just don't have a sense of humor. Either way, I found it quite funny because there was truth in a good portion of it and you would be surprised by how many men actually think and behave that way. it's sad, but true and there are a lot of comedians who make a lot of money doing routines like that; pointing out the truth.
6 months ago
sir i salute you.
1 year ago
Very funny! I love it!
2 years ago
bloody brill you made laugh out loud i thought hubby would hear me
2 years ago
This made me hungry.........................and hard, how about some oral! LOL
2 years ago
Thanks for posting that. Hilarious. Made me laugh out loud.
2 years ago
2 years ago
That is funny!
2 years ago
speaking as a man may i say more so called problem pages should be written by real men after all what problem cant be solved with a good meal and the right amount of oral sex

your story made me lol thanks ;)
2 years ago
god pig porco dio god shit