Dear Dirty Diary - part 5

Dear Dirty Diary,

The next Monday, after Doug went to work, I went over to Louise's to water her plants and check for the e-mails she promised to send to her own computer so Doug couldn't pry into our affairs. There was nothing yet but when I accidentally clicked her address bar down, I saw all the web sites she'd been browsing. Many of them had sexy-sounding names and I noticed she visited some of them several times so I clicked on one of them. It showed all kinds of nude women's pictures on the web page so I just kept clicking whenever it said to. All of a sudden, a close-up photo of a woman's pussy with a lit candle inserted, dripped hot wax down her clitoris in front of me. "Sorta been there!" I chuckled to myself.

I clicked on and on, browsing through scores of pictures of women being tied up, having their nipples tortured, pussies filled with everything imaginable. In spite of their predicaments, I thought it inspiring that they were all still managing carnal smiles for the camera. In awe of these images, I shut down the computer and let my mind imagine how many more perversions we could experiment with.

Like a link in a computer, my mind clicked onto Louise's toy drawer. With trembling hands, I pulled out her drawer and thoroughly examined each naughty little item. It was so arousing to touch each toy, knowing that they all had either been attached to her tender bits or stuffed up her pussy. No matter how objective I tried to remain while examining her collection, my curiosity was continuously drawn to the gold vibrator. In the back of the drawer, I found a pamphlet that explained all of its features. After digesting everything, I realized it had yet another function. If you pulled out on the control switch, not only would it vibrate in timed pulses, it would also automatically swell larger with each pulse.

Unable to contain myself any longer, I lubed it up with KY, pushed it all the way into my vulva and set it for full automatic function after plugging it in. The vibrations were strong and really shook my vulva. Just when it began to drive me crazy, it would click off, swell up a little more then begin to shake again. After about ten minutes of this ever-escalating cycle, my pussy felt rubbery enough to take on a zucchini. I reached down and found that my clitoris stood up just like Louise's each time the vibrator bloated up. I also found that pushing my clit down slightly so it touched against the vibrator, shook my clitoris into three ecstatic orgasms in such rapid succession, I was unable to stand or walk for nearly an hour!

I looked around Louise's empty bedroom, peeked in her clothes drawers and found a heavy little 14 carat gold, heart-shaped locket and chain with her picture inside, tucked away in a corner of her underwear drawer. On a notion, I clipped the locket onto my clit ring and with my legs spread wide apart, gave it a swing. To my clit, it felt simply glorious but it was too much for my poor quivering legs right then. I pulled my panties up tight to keep it still, put away her toys and returned home. Hoping it might be a good luck charm if I combined it with Louise's present, I vowed to wear them both to remind me of her.

After having a shower, the phone rang. As I trotted, still naked, to grab the phone, Louise's locket vigorously swung back and forth from my clit ring, delivering the most delicious of sensations. After I hung up, I must have spent twenty minutes strutting around through the condo, trying different walking styles to find the one that gave the most erotic stimulation. A slow shuffle laced with hip humps like I’d seen Caribbean women do at Caribbana felt really good.


I needed a boogie beat to hump to and just like that it came to me! It took a couple minutes of searching, but I found my old Tractors cassette and cranked up “Boogie Woogie Choo-Choo Train” on my Walkman.

Louise’s locket jerked my clitoris mercilessly to the intoxicating rhythm as I shuffled from our bedroom to the bathroom. I humped my way into the guest bedroom closet where I found and put on my ancient wooden clogs. I clomped, snapped my fingers and jiggled my boobies along that long hall past the staircase. When something brushed my ankle, I looked down and his hand was protruding through the balusters! If this were the old Ally McBeal show, the sound of a needle scratching across a record would have ended the fun. However, this is not a TV show, so a punched a button on my Walkman to stop the music.

“What in hell are you doing?” I heard from down in the stairwell.

With my best aloof expression I replied, “Rewinding!”

I punched the play button then spread my arms wide and grabbed onto railing with both hands. I leaned well over the banister and alternately shrugged each shoulder in time to the music. That sent my breasts into the most undisciplined pattern of jounces. As the Cheshire Cat grinned up, I set my hips into rotating humps, which in turn sent Louise’s locket into motion once more. He peered through the balusters, seemingly engrossed by what he witnessed for a minute then stepped up the stairs toward me. I swung my hips around like a stripper entranced by the lusty pleasures I felt.

He said nothing. He just ambled up behind me and with no forewarning whatsoever I felt his hot knob split my labia. I wiggled and humped and then I felt a very fat penis stretch through my vulva and ram into my vagina! I felt his hairy thighs thump into the backs of my legs. I felt his soft belly splat against my ass as his unusually hot fingers dug into my hips! And then, I felt his nuts whap time after time against my gyrating locket! By the time the second chorus of “Baby likes to rock it!” finished in my headphones I felt his thrusts intensify and then fade quickly so I humped him deep into me and gyrated my hips to the beat of my music. I felt a hot gush flood into my vagina but I just kept on groovin’ to the music. But when he shriveled and fell out that’s when the choo choo slid off its tracks! There’s nothing like the feeling of lukewarm sperm dribbling down one’s inner thighs to sour a train ride!

Doug stopped for a pee then as he brushed past me as if nothing much had happened, I stared with disgust into his pale sad eyes. I wiped off his cold slime with a hot washcloth and got all dressed up in my exercise outfit. With that sweaty fore-headed lump preparing to nap out on me, I decided to work off all that passion on my old exercise bike downstairs!

The seat was loose and its cover was badly cracked so I put the gel seat pad from my mountain bike over it. It still wiggled back and forth a bit but was really comfy. I set its timer for a ten-minute sprint but after a few minutes, the seat began to wobble about. I bounced down hard with all my weight then twisted back and forth, hoping to tighten up the seat so I could continue. It crunched terribly, then suddenly made a cracking noise and abruptly dropped down an inch or so! I felt something push up under me but the seat didn't feel as loose anymore, so I continued pumping.

When the bell rang after the ten minutes was up, I got off, all red-faced and excited and examined the seat. The gel pad was all shiny wet along the newly formed hump. I felt down and found my stretchy bicycle shorts were equally soaked with my vaginal juice from all that rubbing. I peeled off the gel pad to see what had caused the hump. It seemed the seat post had broken right through the brittle old saddle and was sticking up through the middle of it. I pushed on the front of the seat when suddenly it let go. It slid down the post, crashing right down onto the bike's frame. I looked at the shiny chrome post poking at least six or seven inches through the seat and thanked my lucky stars that I hadn't leaned ahead while riding. That hard steel pipe would have been a lot more thrill than I was ready for!

My devious little mind whirred as I ran my fingers up and down the cold hard post. A light bulb lit up in my brain and I was up the stairs to our bedroom as quick as a flash. I skipped back down the stairs, gleefully clutching Doug's evil penis enhancing condom. I slipped it down over the post but it just flopped around loosely on the thin pipe. Reason told me that if it were padded somehow, it would fill out the condom and would feel softer and warmer to the touch. I looked around Doug's workshop and there, covering the pipes coming out the top of the hot water heater were lengths of dark gray foam pipe insulation. The exercise bike's seat post wasn't much thicker than the water pipes so I peeled a chunk off. I trimmed it to the right length with scissors, wrapped it around the post and rolled the condom down it.

Oh my, it was a sight to behold, sticking up out of the seat, so lewd and evil looking. It was spongy and soft when I squeezed it and tight fitting on the seat post. I noticed that the black insulation showed through the latex, giving it a dark tone along its shaft. Other than the pink corona, it looked exactly, like The Devil’s Dick's penis! Memories of that night flooded back into my brain as I studied my creation. It was about the same thickness and nearly as long as The Devil’s Dick's and crazy notions of fulfillment raced through my head. Of course, I immediately named it “The Devil’s Dick” then raced back upstairs to get the KY. After I spread lots of goop all over the monster, I whipped off my bicycle shorts, shoved the mouth of the tube into my pussy and squeezed a big blob of lubricant into my vulva. I feverishly spread more all over my labia. My thighs quivered in anticipation as I stepped up onto the pedals!

Standing straight legged on the pedals, I inched my bottom backwards until I felt the slippery latex corona brush between my bare buttocks. I pumped my hips back and forth slightly so the big fat knob would split me open. When I figured I was ready, I moved my hips back and looked down at it. It looked every bit as disgustingly evil as the last time I saw it. I recalled some of those same insane thoughts I conjured up on our first meeting, combined that with my passion for The Devil’s Dick then let my mind wallow in the mire of my invented lust. I'd rub back and forth against it then stare at it over and over, reveling in my evil notions.

It was my intention just to tease my vulva but my quivering thighs gave out on me and I went into a free fall down on the post. In a split second, it seared right up through my entire vagina and stopped only when my crotch slammed down hard on the seat! Afraid to even breathe, I sat motionless and waited for the pain to rush through me. After four heartbeats, no real pain ripped through me. My crotch and bum tingled from their hard landing but my pussy just felt hot and strangely smug about being split and impaled on my evil Devil Dick post.

I lifted up and off then carefully got off the exercise bike. I wiped my fingers through my slit then checked them for bl**d. No bl**d! I looked up and down the shining wet condom but again, no trace of bl**d. Thank God for KY jelly! Satisfied I hadn't damaged it, my pussy's throbbing immediately told me it was empty and wanted to play again. Carefully I squatted down on the seat again. The second launch was much slower and I felt every inch of Satan's corona plunge up into me. I wiggled my hips a little as I sat and immediately felt the rigidity of its steel core. I wiggled back and forth to loosen myself up. Upon hearing the usual rude slurping noises emanating from my pussy, I carefully began to pump the pedals.

Standing up on the pedals, I pumped hard, as one does while bicycling up steep hills. That produced a rhythmic bobbing action in my hips. That motion resulted in a gloriously smooth, seven inch long thrust up and down the dildo. Between Louise's locket flopping my clit around and my big spongy Devil’s Dick plunging away at my pussy with each and every pump of the pedals, I was sure I'd found heaven.

Following my routine, I went next door to Louise's to water her plants. Sitting at her computer, I smugly contemplated what had assuredly been the most superlative week of depravity and self-indulged sexual gratification in the history of the world! I thought briefly about going to church to seek forgiveness or enrolling in therapy for sexually obsessed sluts like me. Last week, however, had certainly been a new awakening in my sexuality so I'm forgiving myself all my sins by blaming Louise for my addictions. I was a good little wife and mother until I met up with her. I'm wondering if there's a chat room on the Internet for fallen women. Oh lookie here, A Valentine’s Day message pour moi!

With great anticipation I read:

Oh Laura, I need you so badly. I’ve just returned from the funeral parlor after making the arrangements. There’s a terrible winter storm raging outside and my b*****r is unsure if our cousins from Gaspe will be able to get here for Mother’s burial.
It will be a few weeks before everything is settled here so I’ll bring you a pretty little Valentine present you can touch and taste before the end of the month. I love you so much that just the thought of you makes me quiver!
Till then,
Louise xxx


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Posted by AdorableLaura
4 years ago    Views: 419
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4 years ago
Laura biking hard to her happiness! ;-)P
4 years ago
sweet wonderfully naughty lil'lady
4 years ago
A wonderful story. Well told and thought out.
I enjoyed reading your creation.
Well Done.
I'll be keeping my eyes open for your next adventure.
Thx for sharing

Larry