Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 79

Roaming the City on a glorious summers day I find

The sun filtered in through the window, its golden rays warming my naked flesh as I awoke.

I pushed the thin sheet covering back even further and smiled dreamily as I felt a pulse of sexual energy wash over me.

Lazily, I traced my fingers around the fullest part of my breasts, enjoying how heightened my senses were on this gorgeous sunny day. My skin tingled as fingertip connected to flesh, and I trailed a line down my body becoming more aroused by the moment.

My pelvic region began to pulsate as I teased myself running my fingers up and down my legs, and I felt myself becoming wetter... Continue»
Posted by The_Real_Kaz_B 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 385  |  
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My Girlfriend Told Me She's Gay

Not really a true story...but, it sounds like fun...

My Girlfriend Told Me She's Gay

I had a girlfriend who told me she's gay,
My first reaction was to say "No way."
I gave this situation some heavy thought,
It seemed so against everything I was taught,
I told her she just had to go,
Who it was I didn't want to know,
I told her she could do what she like,
I didn't want to meet this other dyke,
Then in a while instead of being furious,
I found myself becoming a bit curious,
What she told me nearly put me in shock,
She'd been dating the girl down the block,
The on... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 385  |  
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Vibration Platform Fitness Machine Product Review

A few months ago my husband and I looked at all different brands of the vibration platform physical fitness machines displayed at a Zoomer Show. After testing all of the exercise positions shown on the visual guide (particularly the sitting ones), I decided that the Turbovibe Light suited my personal requirements the best. I particularly liked the dual motors concept and the flexibility of the electronic remote programming features. All of the other machines at the show had a complex superstructure that I felt impeded diagonal access to the plate area, thus limiting my inventive routines.

S... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 384  |  
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Babymoons: Holidays when pregnant

Babymoons: Holidays when pregnant

Holidaying when you’re expecting is now so popular there’s even a name for it. Practical Parenting has these must-read tips for going on a ‘babymoon'

Holidays for parents-to-be are a growing trend – so much so that resorts and hotels around the world are marketing special packages specifically aimed at ‘babymooners’.

If you’re healthy and well, holidaying with a bump is a great way to relax and enjoy a bit of alone time with your partner pre-bub. But before you pack your bags and book your flights, it pays to do some homework.

The best time

The ... Continue»
Posted by billstew 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 381  |  
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Leslie Loves Sneaking Sex

Leslie, (from the blowjob story) was a really hot girl I met in high school, dated some much older guy during her first year in college but for the upcoming second year of school had broken up with him. For the second year she was moving into an apartment near me with her long time friend Sue.

The first day we moved in, Leslie called me and I invited her and Sue over to my apartment for a few drinks. Sue hit it off with one of my roommates and Leslie asked me to go back to her apartment. She clearly wanted to finish what started a over a year earlier and when we got back to her apartme... Continue»
Posted by nvision 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 380  |  
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Learning Curve with Jessica

Being with Francesca is always like a tonic and I feel completely at ease with her idiosyncrasies

Like the way she adores opera and ballet but most important of all - with me being a red bl**ded guy and all that means; her deep rooted passion which really moves the earth and everything else for me.

When we first met and started learning about each other, our likes and dislikes and how we connected with those things; how we matched interests and how much we were compatible, we both shared a wonderful new and exciting learning curve.

At the age of thirty I discovered the true woman in m... Continue»
Posted by kap007 7 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 378  |  
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Cute And Sensual School Love

As it turned out I was the highest scorer in my cbse exams of class 10 among that class, so very soon I started getting my response from teachers and friends including girls. A few of them struck me as they were very beautiful, and one of them was she. Even though I am writing this story with our mutual consent, let me not display her name, some things are better kept secret. She was a damn good looking girl, with a cute look, average height of 5.3 and a killing smile. A smile for which half the school will die for. She was among the most beautiful girls of the school. She had small boobs whic... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 379  |  
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Happy days ..

So it was way back when the old mid-summer hippy festival used to happen in the fields adjacent to Stonehenge on Salisbury Plain ( that's in England - for our overseas readers ! ) . The current fairy had persuaded me to go to the festival with her and her ex, strange maybe but he had a car .......
We got there and pitched the tents, grabbed a beer and proceeded to skin-up and get nice and mellow. All was going well and she asked me to go for a wander about the site to see what was happening. I don't know if you ever went there, but it was a bit anarchic and a 'no-go-area' for the police. Y... Continue»
Posted by thakery59 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 377  |  
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Vampires! Final Chapter




It was just after sunset and Danny was relaxing alone on a large four poster bed in the luxurious home of the vampire called Christian.

Danny had come to Christian's elegant home with his neighbor Sylvia, who was also a bl**d sucking vampire. Danny and Sylvia had a neat little, mutually beneficial arrangement going where Danny would let the beautiful vampire drink a small portion of his bl**d, and in return Sylvia would give the eighteen year old mind blowing oral sex.

From what Danny c... Continue»
Posted by pornaholic63 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 377  |  
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Having Friends for Lunch: Strange Relationship &nd

With a Sunday afternoon unexpectedly free – many thanks to Richard’s rabble of students, to a man seemingly unable to cope with the dual pressures of actually doing work and handing it in on time, leaving Richard with piles of marking to do – I decided to hit the bookshops. Sounds sad, I know, but I find little to compare with the simple pleasure afforded by wrapping myself in a good book! Internet sites are all terribly convenient, but for me book shopping should be a tactile, sensual experience. I need to pick up and flick through fifty books before I decide. Thus, opting f... Continue»
Posted by ChrisTracy 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 376  |  
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The Wonderfully Naughty Wizard of Oz (Ch7/P1)

Leandra walked out to the throne room. Looking up at the blacken throne of her father, now her's to rule. "Servant come forth and show yourself." She turned from the throne to a small nome coming out of the shadows. He was of average nome height. Had round thin glasses birched on a long nose. His beard was the color of coal. His long robe dark like fresh spilled bl**d, covering his small frame.

"Yes my Queen, what can I do for you."

"What is your name."

"Looppen, your majesty."

"Well Looppen you are my new right hand. You have heard Kaliko screams. Betray me or disappoint me and yo... Continue»
Posted by teflonsamurai 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 376  |  
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Freewill 504: Part 7 Fun and Games

Freewill 504: Part 7 Fun and Games


Me and my two roommates sat quietly in our room studying. For me this wasn't an unusual way to spend a Friday night, especially so deep in a semester, but for Carol and Jessica, it was a rarity indeed. Usually their idea of studying included the stereo blasting and the television on at full volume so it could be heard over the music. This was doubly strange since it was a Friday night. They never stayed home on a weekend night. I sipped at my Diet Coke and continued to flip through my Chemistry book. It was probably ten minutes later that I heard my firs... Continue»
Posted by tzrlvr 10 months ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  Views: 376  |  
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Platonic Hazard

The resounding crash as feet hit water. Ragged breathing. Hearts pumping a mile a minute. I could still hear them behind me. They were shadows in the night, but still tired just as easily. I ran through another puddle, giving them insight as to how far ahead I was...but also how far behind me they were. Minutes after I had ran through the water, I heard the same puddle being disrupted and allowed myself a little grin. Ahead of me an alley way opened into a dead end. I didn't realize this until I had reached the end of it. Staring around myself for any sign of escape I turned when a harsh chuck... Continue»
Posted by Androidbarbie2068 1 year ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 374  |  
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Not really a story, just random personal feelings

Like I said, not a story.


Now I know this is a place where we all can just be ourselves and enjoy some good fucking but it seems to me there is a lot of interest in videos and stories of simulated and/or actual i****t and shit like that.

Listen, I understand that everybody likes different shit but seriously. Why does having sex with your s****r/b*****r/mother/father interest so many people? I'm a guy like any other and yeah I admit I had fantasy's about my mother a LOOOOOOOONG time ago and I squashed those feelings when I hit puberty.

Second, what's with the criticism of the acting... Continue»
Posted by BigJ0526 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 374  |  
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Idle Jack

An old, old tale of Lady Jane
Of how she lost her honour.
And how the lad called Idle Jack
Inflicted shame upon her.

Young Jane, a pure and simple lass,
Of years just sweet eighteen
With hair of gold and eyes so blue
And skin like golden cream.

Whene're she walked around the town
The local lads would sigh
And all their trouser fronts would bulge
As this fair lass passed by.

But Lady Jane was innocent
And never knew the score
She just assumed the bulge was naught
And knew not what it's for.

No... Continue»
Posted by pictureman645 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 373  |  
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Hardonis Academy P-12

Chapter 12, Third Day


The three new friends met at breakfast the next day, they were all smiling. Even though they had not had sex with each other, they seemed sure of forming a tight bond. The Academy was centered on the Hall building, which included the dining area, library, club rooms, student council and newspaper offices, and the theater. To the East were the two dorm buildings. To the West was the sports complex, which included the medical office. To the north was the administration building, witch included the guidance councilor’s office. To the South was the large square ... Continue»
Posted by VictorL4fun 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 373  |  
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Future Fuckin' - Fiction

January 5, 2113
Today was better than yesterday, at least. I was only f***ed to ejaculate seven times, compared with the 12 times I had to endure yesterday. I'm not sure what they think they're doing to me, but I know that if they keep it up, my balls will run permanently dry. They already feel like a couple of dust bunnies and I'm only halway through the week!

January 6, 2113
I was talking to a new "recruit" today about what's been going on outside these walls since I got here a year ago. Apparently, not much has changed. The Worldwide Overpopulation Mitigation And Neutralization program... Continue»
Posted by femalesonly 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 373  |  
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Dominant Bather

He stands, staring down into the clear pool seeing reflections of others. Others that he has known and some he only wished he had known. His thoughts are not the clear thoughts of a man in true consideration of events gone by, but a cyclone of pictures like the vision one is said to have before dying. He is not dying, he is very much alive and in complete control. His heart beats at a rhythm he is himself imposing. As the rhythm increases so does the cyclone of thought. What is seen doesn’t matter anymore as long as the rhythm is kept. His eyes are now clenched shut; grinding teeth, clear pear... Continue»
Posted by Testdriver 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 372  |  
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First Time Interracial Guy Anal Painfully Short

My asshole is still aching every time I need to take a shit and I hold it, and it feels shamefully good when I go as it slides out my destroyed gaping ass. My cock has been getting rock hard when I notice the pain in my ass as I’m sitting in my meeting trying to re-adjust my position. It’s the perverted disgusting little things that made getting ****d worth it, but I guess you can’t really call it that when you ignore every instinct and put yourself in a situation like that.

I was feeling horny, desperate, working a lot and stressed out… for whatever reason searched and actually found a dec... Continue»
Posted by letsnotell 8 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 374  |  
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Cyber-sex

Introduction: This one's pretty long, but in my opinion its well worth the read once you get to the end.

Online computer users often engage in what is affectionately known as "Cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into keyboards and shared through Internet phone lines get pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see below, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat doesn't seem to quite get the point of Cybersex. Then again, maybe he does....

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?

Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high h... Continue»
Posted by PornApocalypse 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 371  |  
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