Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 78
The other night I had such a vivid dream, but it was so surreal. I have to tell you about it.
I was at an afternoon party at my s****r's house. The whole f****y was there. It was like a f****y reunion. My other b*****rs and s****rs, and almost all of their c***dren and grandc***dren were there also.
I must tell you that I am in my mid-forties, married, without any c***dren of my own. I am the youngest of my siblings by several years. Many of my nieces and nephews are my age or just a few years younger than me. As we were sitting and moving around, I was teasing and playing with my grand... Continue»
I had just landed up my first job in Mumbai (immediately after college) and had moved into a one bedroom flat (apartment) in Andheri. It was a f****y friend’s flat and I was in the process of purchasing it from them (with financial help from my parents and Bank) as my parents had moved to native place to spend their old years. My flat was on the fifth floor and there were four flats per floor in our section. I am 5’11”, well built, exercises regularly (daily) and 25 years of age. The excitement of the job, new flat, living independently, were all too much for a young excited ... Continue»
Amsterdam was first in the world with many things. Good and bad.
The first financial bubble: speculation in the tulip market. Tulips aren´t even Dutch, they originate from Turkey. The first banks as well. Happy to finance, speculate and invest in American independance. As the Brits were our favourite enemies.
But also the first "Flower Institute" for transforming classy virgins into full blown women. But that´s a long story. Patient readers: welcome to next paragraphs.
We did the "Golden Revolution" for the Brits, but had to swallow swapping New York for Surinam after we lost the seco... Continue»
I walked along Watauga Avenue, my bare feet chilled by the damp concrete. Tonya was in Virginia, visiting her mother and I had gotten bored sitting at home alone. It was a rainy, foggy Monday night and there was very little traffic, so I had decided to take a long walk, naked. The only time I’d had to be careful of being spotted was at Church Circle as I left Sullivan Street. For safety’s sake, I had walked around Charlemont Avenue so I could pass behind the churches and bright floodlights.
Passing Linville Street, I started really looking at the big houses that lined Watauga. Most of them we... Continue»
The sun was coming in through the room window next to where I sat, making my white shirt stick to the sweat on my torso. I eased open the top button of my shirt and checked that my tie was up hiding this uniform crime from Miss Willims. Daydreaming away the final minutes of double english I let her voice become a meaningless drone. " But low what light.." she read. RRRRRRRRRRRR - the bell went and the whole class raised slightly as i the bell instilled a new energy into us.
Packing my bag I wandered down the stairs and out into the cooling breeze blowing across from the sports fiel... Continue»
She agreed and she had no idea that I was planning to have her milk in return of juice. She was wearing a red tight shirt and black jeans. Her boobs were so big that accidentally her button opened up exposing her white bra and mild cleavage. I told her that the juice is being prepared till then I could show her my home. That was a plan to take her to my bedroom. She agreed and her button was still open.
She came to my bedroom and then I told her to sit on my bed while I bring the juice. I got the juice and purposely I acted to fall and spill her glass of juice on her shirt and my glass o... Continue»
I'm not really sure where the dream ended and the reality began, but at some point, I do know that I woke up. It was 2 am and I was dreaming away, about unicorns or chipmunks or naugahyde, or what the fuck ever it is that people dream about that they can't remember the second they wake up, but tonight my dream took a turn. It started out as a light suggestion in the back of my mind of someone groping my breasts. Pretty quickly, that sensation turned and became more intense as I dreamed of someone tweaking and pulling at my nipples and I could feel my dreamself becoming aroused as the hands ... Continue»
I'm sure this is a true story...for somebody...
Johnny And Mary, A True Story...
Now Johnny knew Mary since they were little tykes,
Running in the field, riding their bikes,
Like other little k**s, they stayed out all day,
Doing their chores, later they'll play,
Johnny and Mary went to school,
Tried real hard, act real cool,
Johnny noticed Mary started to grow real fine,
Nice firm breasts, big behin',
Johnny thought he'd take him a chance,
He asked Mary to the high school dance,
Mary said fine, pick me up at eight,
Dress real sharp, now don't be late,
One day there was a man who was driving down the highway when he got cut off by a careless driver,the man doing his best to avoild a accident couldn't stop.His car flipped over three times and bust into flames,when the firemen and rescue services got there they saw he he was burned very badly.After six months in the hospidtol he made a full recovery,but there was one problem his eyebrows were gone.They couldn't find no human hair to match his hair,so they used the hair from the hind leg of a dog.So the man lived the rest of his life very well untill he passes a fireplug,when he do
We've seen that bedroom fantasies and dirty talk in bed can be a huge turn on, and can also improve your sex life by miles in the introduction article.
But after seeing how dirty talking in bed can actually lead to mistrust if not kept in check, you may want to know if bedroom fantasies are a boon or a bane to couples in love.
Can bedroom fantasies and sexual fantasies go bad?
Firstly, even before we talk about when it can go bad, we have to realise that anything in moderation is great and can be a huge turn on.
But too much of any good thing usually leads to bad results.
So bed... Continue»
Planet of the Gigantic schlongs
By The Iceman
It all began in a place not too long ago but in a faraway
place. There was a planet way out of the galaxy
that no researcher ever discovered and most likely
never will be. The story begins on a planet called
Weenus. Nobody knows how the planet got
its name. Perhaps we’ll never know…..
Although not very much is known about the history of the planet Weenus, there was something very unique about it. There was no war, pollution, crime or poverty that existed in any form. The inhabitants lived peacefully. But what was so unique about t... Continue»
Black characters; dont like it dont read my shit & keep it moving...
Tasha had her learners permit for 2 months now, and her parents couldnt keep her from behind the wheel for practice. Every chance she was in a car she begged to drive. 'Come on practice makes perfect...' she begged. After a while Tasha felt her skills were good enough, and whatever she couldnt do she'd pick up along the way. Tasha decided to take her dad's car for a ride. She picked up her girlfriends Traci & Loni for a ride around town.
Traci said to stop by her boyfriend's house for a min, so Tasha did. Traci went up... Continue»
I look at her as if she were a godess, she has long black hair you no down to the top of here butt, deep blue eyes and a great pair of lips that say kiss me soft or kiss me hard I just wont to be kissed But its my mums best friend what was i gonna do?
One morning as I woke I heard laughter from downstairs I know one was my mum but was not sure of the other laughter so i got dressed and went down to see who else was there as i went into the livingroom there she was the women i always seem to think about when im alone in my bedroom ;-). I could not belive it i'm stud there looking all tired a... Continue»
They hadn't been married long. Still in the newlywed stage of things. They had, however, settled into a happy routine. Joe's only wish for Jamie - that she be a little more demanding in the bedroom. Jamie was shy, almost timid, not sure of herself when it came to asking for what she wanted. While making love, Joe would try to bring Jamie out of her shell, get her move vocal and involved. Did she like to be touched here? What position felt best? Jamie would try but it was still difficult for her. Joe loved her and accepted that he would always be the more dominant in their relationship. Or n... Continue»
It was 7pm and I just got home from another overnight shift. I flop down on my couch and then in walks my beautiful gf Robyn. Shes in her black 6' heels and she looks sooo busty with her 32E tits. She tells me she wants make me relax. We then go to the basement where she has the bed frame with ropes and handcuffs laying on a pillow. She tells me to lay down and relax. I lay down and then hear the sound of handcuffs closing around my writsts. Then feel ropes being tied around my wrists and ankles. Last the takes a belt and ties it around my torso so I can only move my head. She then takes a kni... Continue»
Hi I am back after a long absence. Here is a dirty story about me getting fucked at my s****rs’ mates’ birthday party.
So we got there and I was wearing this sexy black dress that barely covered my tits and arse (Emma was in a nice dress too). Anyway the house was packed Id say 75 % of people there were lads. This Tracy girl knew what she was doing for her birthday. I tried to dance but I am not very good and I didn’t like the weird mix of chav and westlife music.
After I knocked back a vodka martini I went after a lad called Craig who was 19. He snogged my face off and his tongue felt... Continue»
(Reading "All-You-Can-Eat Buffet" and "Back For More" is helpful, but not required. Comments welcome.)
I woke to a mass of red hair in my face. I kissed the head it belonged to, and pulled the attached body closer. Something was amiss, however. It didn't feel like my wife's body. This one was a little bit thinner. Then it turned over, and all the previous night returned to me.
“Good morning,” Sally said.
“I'm not so sure. It was morning when we went to sl**p.” I looked at my phone on the nightstand. 12:01 p.m., as if to prove a point. I rolled onto my back, and pulled her head ont... Continue»
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub.
She gestures alluringly to the barman, who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals for him to bring his face
close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard,
which is full and bushy.
"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both
"Actually, no" he replies.
"Can you get him for me -- I need to speak to him." She is running her
hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.
"I'm afraid that I can't," breathes the barman, clearly aroused. ... Continue»
This very hot pic posted today by eyesonu, stirred up an old memory.
The girl in the pic reminds me of a young local student ecsort I once fucked at the Atlanta Sheraton, about 15 years ago. Nice memories of the encounter and events surrouding it.
I was at a trade show as part of a group of about 12 people from various businesses. I had some free time after lunch and arranged for this girl to come to my room. We had a fun time even though the girl was new to the work, and quite nervous. She was a great kis... Continue»
She had agreed to allow him to restrain her as part of their foreplay…it wasn’t the first time that they’d tried some ‘vanilla’ bondage but tonight she knew that it wasn’t going to be quite so ‘vanilla’. He’d been hinting all week that he was going to make her beg…and he fully intended to make this a night that she’d never forget. She was a stirring sight, tied with her hands overhead and crossed, her tits pulled up tightly by her body’s position. Her breasts were full, beautiful and perfectly shaped with her nipples defiantly high in their attitude. Her legs were placed wid... Continue»