Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 78

Milking the Love


In the morning the sun was shining right through our front room windows as I walked in wearing nothing but my gown. The carpet is very soft and the whole room was warm. Jenny was in her gown as she reached for a sheet, a large bed sheet that she folded neatly and placed on the floor as she did so she undone my gown and I got down on my hands and knees on the blanket.


As I undone Richards gown his penis jumped out to meet me. I completely removed the gown and as Richard got in position I gently moved his legs apart to allow the air to circulate nicely ... Continue»
Posted by Torqy 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  



It was supposed to be a weak RNA strand that
disabled the enemy then withered.
The vector virus had other ideas.
It found a single, mutated Ecoli bacterium
and mated with it.
Military “Intelligence” had finally fucked us all.

“M0m will be furious with me,” I thought, lying in bed,
trying to figure how I'd refuse the “corrective” surgery
and not get kicked out of the house.
The alarm clock beeped.

“I'm 18, why NOW?? I grew up this way! NO, mom, NO!”

Fifty rehearsals in my head.
I waited.

Then voices in the street.
I looked out the w
... Continue»
Posted by yutubeslut 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
  |  12

Teens 2

Story 2

Crazy hippie junky love, that was all about the relationship between Marry and Alex. They would take every toilet in every bar, every party we went, and every scene with them ended up with them fucking like crazy. Unfortunately she was really a junky in those days so, of course she was slowly changing him too.
One day I was in the kitchen, drinking some beer, when they came to me laughing. Marry sat down, took some beer and light a cigarette. She was dressed in one of those colorful dresses, and a leather jacket that I guess it was her guys’. She looked damn hot. “You know what ... Continue»
Posted by HerbaAlice 11 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
  |  4

Sexy Studying Sessions!

Honor looked at me from across the bed and caught my eyes staring at her fiery red hair.

"Are you ok Tommy," She asked, "I really need you to help me with these Maths problems and then we can concentrate on Physics"

We were both 16 and in Year 11 at our school. We had been good friends for ages and as our exams were fast approaching she had asked me to help her with her Maths, and in return i asked her to help me with my Physics. I had fancied her like mad for years but had never had the courage to ask her out.

"Yeah, i'm fine, just distracted a little." I replied, never taking my eye... Continue»
Posted by tomtheaussie 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
  |  1

Chapter V Lesbian Love & sodomy

Great Lesbian Love and sodomy
Chapter V --- ---

Other stories to read:

After this meeting with Michelle and Mark, we often spent evenings together. Sometimes I came alone or with the elected if it accepted the moment. Throughout this period I confess I papillonnais a girl to another. Finally, rather than admit I had in reserve several lovers, and that depending on the mood I was choosing one or the other. Each may not know the existence of others .. Not necessarily, with some it does not pose a problem while others are more exclusive I had to juggle... Continue»
Posted by CinquantNERF 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  

Quality Not Quan-titty

(A short poem written in praise of my lovers' boobies, all of them regardless of size - and I include my own rather large ones in that category because nobody loves mine more than I do, with the possible exception of my lovely husband! Don't be fooled by the fact that it appears to be written from the male perspective - disregard gender as well as size. It's all about the love of boobies in general, but through my eyes and my lusts!)

My lover's tits are so tiny,

It's so plain for all to see,

Though my lover's tits are so tiny,

She sure loves them - just like me!

... Continue»
Posted by optanda 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
  |  21

Han Valen Production office stow aways

Another show, another rigging call. The glamorous life of a big rock show usually begins at 6 AM in the morning putting the rigging in place that holds those massive sound and lighting systems in the air.

This day was starting out like any other. I got to the Arena around 5:15 AM so I could let in the caterers and stagehands. I got the guard to open to door and he went back on his cart to his office. I grabbed my briefcase and headed to the production office. When I got there I opened the door and there was a young girl sitting the desk. She kind of startled me. I asked if I could h... Continue»
Posted by kdrummer 2 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  

Pussy Types

1. Expensive Pussy
Most pussy falls into this definition. Expensive Pussy can be recognized by the following – fur coats, $500 dresses, spandex, bright colored shorts, and shirts with greek letters on them. 98% of good pussy falls into this category.
Advantages: If you can afford it, it will be great.
Disadvantages: Many, mostly in the form of checking account depletion. Often not worth it.
2. Cheap Pussy
Very rare. Usually comes in the form of a girlfriend of yours who will not go away no matter what you do. Cheap Pussy can be recognized by the following – she will often pa... Continue»
Posted by sexy_boy1985 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
  |  15

Asian Cum Slut

The night I met Mei in a London club, she was dressed the way you see in
Japanese anime. I told her, and she got all offended since she was Chinese,
and anyway she could not understand what I meant, or so she claimed.

She had on high heeled boots, knee high socks the kind you'll see matched
with schoolgirl uniforms, a chequered plaid skirt that barely covered her
ass, and a white shirt that could barely contain her immense 38E bust.
She looked obscene - breasts that size on a chink, especially one not more
than 5'1 or 5'2 that couldn't be a day over 18 just accentuated the
anime-girl... Continue»
Posted by pornofiend 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
  |  12

Flaunting It At the Frat Party

Flaunting It At the Frat Party

The name is Tolden. James Tolden. There are three things you need to know about me.....
I am tall. My towering height of 6’9” made me a natural for basketball, and my talent made me a star.
I am hung like a Bull Elephant. The same early growth spurts which gave me height, also added copious inches to my manhood, which was well-sized to begin with.
I am not above humiliating a lesser man. I’ve done it lots of times. This was the first.
I had been invited to my first Frat party my freshman year of ... Continue»
Posted by jkd1111 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
  |  1

The Gamer

I laid across the bed on my stomach holding myself up by my elbows wearing just a T-shirt and my boxers looking up at the computer screen with the controller in my hands as my Guild and I marched boldly into the Forsaken Fortress to finally take down the Necromancer King. “This is it you guys” I said over the team channel knowing that this was going to be a long and tough fight, “I need a Defense boost” Shadow_Heart said over the comm. It didn’t take long for Elfkiller1 to start boosting everyone’s STATS, “first one to die has to put 500 gold into the guild bank” The-Bone-Eater said with a gig... Continue»
Posted by Rust1 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  

A visit to the vets

Three dogs were sitting in the waiting room at the vet's when they started a conversation. The Black Labrador turned to the yellow Labrador and
asked " So why are you here today? "

The yellow Lab replied, " I'm a serial pisser. I piss on everything, I piss on the couch, the carpet, the curtains, the cat, the k**s. But last night was the final straw when I pissed on my owner's."

The black Lab said, " So what's the vet going to do? "

"Well, he's going to cut my balls off," answered the yellow Labrador. "Supposedly it'll calm me down and stop me pissing everywhere."

The Yellow Lab t... Continue»
Posted by sjroche1509 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
  |  1

Make Yourself Cum

Let me start by saying I have an over active sex drive. I could be doing anything, and suddenly I become unexpectedly aroused. Sometimes even the littlest things can set me off anything from putting clothes in the washer to an erotic glance from an interesting stranger. The smell of fresh cut grass, and the feel of it on my bare feet can bring back a flow of memories of previous outdoor sexual experiences.

Anyway when the urge hits me unexpectedly, I choose to masturbate and after the last time I decided to share my personal experience with everyone..

I ran to my bedroom and sla... Continue»
Posted by rime923091 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
  |  1


Right i thought, ill get this last job sorted then race home and have the house to myself for an hour or so before the wife gets in. Both the k**s are away so i thought ill enjoy some sexy time alone. I rushed home and swung the van into the first space i could find. When i jumped out my freshly shaven cock was already starting to pulsate as i thought about my beautiful wives sexy panties in the wash basket just waiting to be explored.

I kicked of my shoes and dropped my trousers releasing my massive hard throbbing cock, and went upstairs. I reached into the wash basket and found 3 pairs o... Continue»
Posted by himNher 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
  |  3

Going Dogging

(Mature lady takes on two)

As I went to get us a nightcap I saw the barman glance across to Eileen and smile. I followed his gaze to see that Eileen had apparently carelessly allowed her skirt to ride up over her stocking tops and as she uncrossed her legs was giving him and I a good stretch of creamy thigh and a flash of her newly shaven pussy. She smiled when she saw us glancing across and slowly crossed her legs to leave her short tight black skirt still a good few inches short of her lace top hold-ups.

As he gave me our drinks he smiled and said" you are a lucky man". I realised this... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
  |  1

in mywildest dreams

now this is some shit thats hrd to belive
never could i ever imagined what was going to happen to me
as i lay therelost in a dream filled with differentwoman in front of me
somewere black somewere whitethe majority looked like white but as i stared getting to know each one it was clearthat race didnt really appear wellat least 2 me it didnt becausetheonlything i saw were nice shaped bodys notthe way u would think...but niced shaped in a way that me...
the roundest of tits the thickness in there assess and legs u see i like that shit it turns me on callme different call mewron... Continue»
Posted by dblac2 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
  |  3


Continuation of part 1

Isabel finally made it to her relative's place .her face was completely haggard and worn out still panting from her little escapade.Every now and then she was able to stop,took a deep breath and took some rest.Knocking on the door, still panting, waited for the door to open ,for her unexpected arrival.Not long enough , the door opens , and greeted her cousin Belinda still panting."Hello Belinda!! she smiled faintly. Hey!!! What a surprise !!! What happened to you?Belinda snapped. How come you are panting like someone chased you? Belinda pointed out. Yes ... Continue»
Posted by constantienab73 8 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
  |  2

The State Cop

Last year, around Christmas time, I was back on the East
Coast for Christmas break. I had borrowed my b*****r's new
Corvette, (b*****r is a newly licensed physician) and headed out
to a Christmas party in the Highlands. This was the first time I
had been separated from my SO in a year, so I guess I was feeling
a little unattached.
I got to the party and it was wonderful. I had a couple of
champagnes and danced away most of the night. At 1 am my ex-
boyfriend from high school came in with his newly acquired
fiance. I hadn't seen Danny in 3 years, and I was a little taken
aba... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
  |  2

Emma’s Joy Stick

She sucked on his cock with relish across the gear stick separating the two front seats. Knowing the more danger they were both in the harder he would cum, Emma sucked him harder with gusto and worked the throbbing rock-hard ‘stick’ in her mouth, her tongue slithered and pressed every which way inside. His hands were busy changing gears and steering the wheel, concentrated hard on keeping the car on the road and not the ditch on the side. Every pothole Andrew couldn’t avoid jolted his cock deep into Emma’s mouth, hit the back of the throat every so often.

Now that the blow job keeps both oc... Continue»
Posted by MinxGirl 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
  |  8

I Treated the Slut Like Shit...

She's a minger and she knows it: forty with a wonky eye, overweight and with an abundance of moles on her arms with a large one on her stomach. Her personal hygiene leaves a little to be desired too but she has big tits and nipples though.

She absolutely adores me but the thing is I just don't give a damn about her: she is just a sexual object to me like the majority of my women. And I have had loads,fucking loads.

On the plus side, however, she is a tad kinky – I guess it’s the only thing the ugly bitch has going for her.

Anyway, it's Wednesday and my day off – I know s... Continue»
Posted by Kinky_Mushroom 2 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Taboo  |