Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 77

CAUGHT AND PUNISHED !!!!!!

Right i thought, ill get this last job sorted then race home and have the house to myself for an hour or so before the wife gets in. Both the k**s are away so i thought ill enjoy some sexy time alone. I rushed home and swung the van into the first space i could find. When i jumped out my freshly shaven cock was already starting to pulsate as i thought about my beautiful wives sexy panties in the wash basket just waiting to be explored.

I kicked of my shoes and dropped my trousers releasing my massive hard throbbing cock, and went upstairs. I reached into the wash basket and found 3 pairs o... Continue»
Posted by himNher 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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in mywildest dreams

now this is some shit thats hrd to belive
never could i ever imagined what was going to happen to me
as i lay therelost in a dream filled with differentwoman in front of me
somewere black somewere whitethe majority looked like white but as i stared getting to know each one it was clearthat race didnt really appear wellat least 2 me it didnt becausetheonlything i saw were nice shaped bodys notthe way u would think...but niced shaped in a way that appealed...to me...
the roundest of tits the thickness in there assess and legs u see i like that shit it turns me on callme different call mewron... Continue»
Posted by dblac2 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Emma’s Joy Stick

She sucked on his cock with relish across the gear stick separating the two front seats. Knowing the more danger they were both in the harder he would cum, Emma sucked him harder with gusto and worked the throbbing rock-hard ‘stick’ in her mouth, her tongue slithered and pressed every which way inside. His hands were busy changing gears and steering the wheel, concentrated hard on keeping the car on the road and not the ditch on the side. Every pothole Andrew couldn’t avoid jolted his cock deep into Emma’s mouth, hit the back of the throat every so often.

Now that the blow job keeps both oc... Continue»
Posted by MinxGirl 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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WHEN LUST AND WIT COLLIDE.(Final Edition).

Continuation of part 1

Isabel finally made it to her relative's place .her face was completely haggard and worn out still panting from her little escapade.Every now and then she was able to stop,took a deep breath and took some rest.Knocking on the door, still panting, waited for the door to open ,for her unexpected arrival.Not long enough , the door opens , and greeted her cousin Belinda still panting."Hello Belinda!! she smiled faintly. Hey!!! What a surprise !!! What happened to you?Belinda snapped. How come you are panting like someone chased you? Belinda pointed out. Yes ... Continue»
Posted by constantienab73 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Pussy Types

1. Expensive Pussy
Most pussy falls into this definition. Expensive Pussy can be recognized by the following – fur coats, $500 dresses, spandex, bright colored shorts, and shirts with greek letters on them. 98% of good pussy falls into this category.
Advantages: If you can afford it, it will be great.
Disadvantages: Many, mostly in the form of checking account depletion. Often not worth it.
2. Cheap Pussy
Very rare. Usually comes in the form of a girlfriend of yours who will not go away no matter what you do. Cheap Pussy can be recognized by the following – she will often pa... Continue»
Posted by sexy_boy1985 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Husband watches

Jools was quite simply beautiful. She sat astride him and he could not believe he was so fortunate. She was like a naughty angel. Albeit an angel with flawless makeup and one wearing a black and red leather corset, fishnet stockings and high heels.
"I'm going to fuck you hard," she whispered, leaning closer to him. "You're going to cum so much and I want it all."
"Oh my god," he managed to gasp as she leant forwards to nuzzle his ear, running her tongue up his neck. His cock was a hard pain between his legs. It twitched as she brushed his legs with her fishnets. Her nipples were visib... Continue»
Posted by bumfelt 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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hiding at the football game

so it was the begining of my senior year
my ex and i were staying after school to walk around until the homecoming game started. so we were walking around the campus just trying to be alone together to sort through some troubles we were having, and of course when we FINALLY got comfortable enough to tlk everyone started to show up so we decide to sneak into the school through the auditorium window to get some quiet. so we were sitting in the back row of seats in the huge echoing auditorium tlking, when i put my arm over her shoulder and pull her closer to me so i can rest my head on hers. she... Continue»
Posted by c-mon96 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Letters to Mario

This story is a bit of a fanfic, if you want to call it that, telling Princess Peach's misadventures while being in Bowser's grasp. It's told from her perspective through a series of letters wrote to Mario in which she discovers that maybe she isn't as pure as she was raised to think. I wrote that on an other website some time ago and it was pretty well received there, so here it is! It's still a work in progress.

---

Dear Mario, I hope you'll get this letter. In my heart I know you are coming to free me from Bowser, but please come as quickly as you possibly can! As soon as he threw me ... Continue»
Posted by masterfg42 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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I Treated the Slut Like Shit...

She's a minger and she knows it: forty with a wonky eye, overweight and with an abundance of moles on her arms with a large one on her stomach. Her personal hygiene leaves a little to be desired too but she has big tits and nipples though.

She absolutely adores me but the thing is I just don't give a damn about her: she is just a sexual object to me like the majority of my women. And I have had loads,fucking loads.

On the plus side, however, she is a tad kinky – I guess it’s the only thing the ugly bitch has going for her.

Anyway, it's Wednesday and my day off – I know s... Continue»
Posted by Kinky_Mushroom 1 year ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Poetry of the Genitals

Her

I cannot help it I love your dick,
Upon its head I like to lick.
I love the hardness of your shaft,
It’s no game but a well skilled craft.
I love to linger around its head,
And make you cum all over the bed.
And oh we can’t forget the balls,
Cause their my favorite part of all.
I’ll finish the task by jacking you off,
And swallow real well so you don’t make me cough.

I LOVE THE COCK!

Him

I love to eat your creamy pie,
About this fact I could not lie.
To take my time and eat you well,
To taste your love and feel you swell.
It is the greatest thought of all,
... Continue»
Posted by Testdriver 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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A Book to Remember

A Book to Remember
by Just4kinks


J4K’s heart raced as the elegant young man entered the library. She blushed as his penetrating eyes met hers, she remembered last night’s hot steamy sex and she was pleasantly surprised he came back for more. It has been such a long time since her life has been filled with passion. Heck, it was six months since her husband touched her and at 40, she was at the peak of her sexuality. She was ready to put on her sexy boots and rock and roll, not spend hours on end watching senseless television shows on the couch.

She tried her best to k... Continue»
Posted by just4kinks 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The State Cop

Last year, around Christmas time, I was back on the East
Coast for Christmas break. I had borrowed my b*****r's new
Corvette, (b*****r is a newly licensed physician) and headed out
to a Christmas party in the Highlands. This was the first time I
had been separated from my SO in a year, so I guess I was feeling
a little unattached.
I got to the party and it was wonderful. I had a couple of
champagnes and danced away most of the night. At 1 am my ex-
boyfriend from high school came in with his newly acquired
fiance. I hadn't seen Danny in 3 years, and I was a little taken
aba... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Going Dogging

(Mature lady takes on two)

As I went to get us a nightcap I saw the barman glance across to Eileen and smile. I followed his gaze to see that Eileen had apparently carelessly allowed her skirt to ride up over her stocking tops and as she uncrossed her legs was giving him and I a good stretch of creamy thigh and a flash of her newly shaven pussy. She smiled when she saw us glancing across and slowly crossed her legs to leave her short tight black skirt still a good few inches short of her lace top hold-ups.

As he gave me our drinks he smiled and said" you are a lucky man". I realised this... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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How To Have Sex With a Friend

Seriously, who hasn’t met a friend who’s sexy and all that?

And how many of us haven’t wondered how to have sex with a friend?

It feels so good to be bad. It feels even better to cross that boundary and play dirty, doesn’t it?

Life in the fast lane couldn’t get any faster in these days of fast love and raging hormones. It’s hard to get over the blues of being single especially when everyone around is either madly in love, or physically in love.

If lovers can do it, why not friends? After all, friends do share everything lovers share, other than physical intimacy.

Sex with a frie... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Sandals Honeymoon

A new wife goes black.

Chapter 1

We were on our honeymoon in Montego Bay .. I was doing lots of drinking with new friends the night before .. playing drinking games for points .. the wife was real horny when we got home at around 4am .. started me off by giving a hot fingering show .. she laid back on the four-poster bed in our ocean-front suite with only the white terry cloth robe that they give you for the vacation ...

She was teasing me as I got ready for bed .. I undressed as she was rubbing that juicy pussy .. telling me to watch her get herself off .. she laid back... Continue»
Posted by magas911 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Hardcore, Shemales  |  
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Dating tips for guys

1. Wear the right kind of after-shave lotion or perfume. But remember, not too much, not too less!

2. Though you would like her to think of you as a toughie so she feels protected in your presence. This particular attitude puts off a lot of girls. Most of the times guys are so consumed with acting macho that makes girls think you are not sensitive enough! So, take it easy!

3. Most of the men don't think they have to pay attention to the way they dress. Well...you may not want to apply make-up though some guys do but that doesn't mean you land up on your date just like that! Remember to s... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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One Night in April: Part 2

It had always been a fantasy of mine to have sex in the shower. To have a hot chick caress my naked body while hot soapy water cascaded over us. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my Best Friends s****r would be that woman. It didn't even occur to me that she'd be staring up at me with her emerald eyes as she absolutely devoured my hard cock.

"Stop that tickles!" April giggled as I gently ran my fingers through her hair.

"I'm not doing anything." I said.
"It's your cock, it's poking my butt cheek."

I looked down at my lap and sure enough my erect dick was poking April's cheek... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 16

Dear Dirty Diary,

Thanksgiving weekend all the Huntingdon stores started pushing their winter fashions, so Louise and I went shopping. Even with all the closet space in our new apartment, I had to do some fall-cleaning to make room. I dumped out my pantyhose and tights drawer on the bed beside my relaxing husband.

Each pair I got rid of, Doug would pick up, carefully examine, then like an old fart would ask, “What’s wrong with these?”

I’d point out the runs in the expensive ones and the starchy feet and sags of the cheap ones. I hesitated for too long before tossing out one ... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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When I became a sex maniac a few years ago

When I became a sex maniac a few years ago, I immediately worried that the Caveman might not be able to handle me - satisfy me. I didn't see that it would take time for us to really learn how to have sex together (duh!). But over these weeks of having a lot of love making and writing stories about it, we've really come along way (couldn't resist the pun).


Every time we have sex it's a little different, a little saucier, a little sexier: sometimes because it's naughtier, sometimes because it's gentler, and always because it's starting to feel completely unscripted. By writing these sex sto... Continue»
Posted by alexandra17xx 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The Italian Job 16

The Italian Job 16
Italian weddings are very special things with lots of singing and dancing and eating and drinking, I know English weddings are meant to be the same but they do not seem to have the flair of the Mediterranean countries and especially a village wedding where everyone knows everyone including all their relatives both dead and alive, so when Sonia’s daughter decided to get married to one of the village lads the village started to make preparations in a big way, the bunting came out as well as the balloons and the flags and of course the preparations for a street party, mention ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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