Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 70
REASONS WHY YOU MUST GET TOGETHER WITH A HORSE RIDERS
1) We have four speeds and can be many different positions ...
2) We have on our tight pants
3) We like getting dirty
4) We know how to ride really
5) We always do our best in the drawing
6) We love having control
7) We can ride for hours
8) We know how to deal with big things
9) We are going off and on easily
10) We are always ready
11) We like it hard
12) We have leg and back muscles that help us manage all the different positions
13) We love using whips
14) legs apart is our natural position
15) We do... Continue»
January 30. 2012
This is my first Journal entry. Why do people write a journal? Probably because they’re lonely. But I, the great Takuri, or at least that’s what I’m calling myself these days, am never lonely. No I’m writing this journal so that other people can see, can read what great things I’ve done and where I’ve erred. It feels like I’m writing the truth. As a magician I spent my whole life living in illusions, bending the truth both to the audience but also to my humble self, now it feels like I can finally tell the whole story, you can’t go to somebody who you are manipulating and tel... Continue»
Time: 2030. Place: The northern side to the entrance of Ryde Harbour on the Isle of Wight.
From where I am, facing west, the most significant feature is Ryde Pier. The pier constructed in 1815 is the oldest pier in Britain. It is the fourth longest behind: Southend, Southport and Walton-on-Naze. It actually consists of three piers: one for the railway, another for a tramway - disused since 1969 and the busiest section which is utilised by pedestrians, cyclists and light traffic.
As I hold this in my minds eye a train rumbles down the tracks. The train has two coaches and is of ex London Unde... Continue»
4 Laughing eyes
4 Well-shaped legs
4 Loving arms
2 Firm milk containers
1 soft, warm mixing bowl
1 Firm banana
1. Look into laughing eyes.
2. Spread well-shaped legs with loving arms.
3. Squeeze and massage milk containers very gently.
4. Gently add firm banana to mixing bowl, working in and out until well creamed. For best results. Continue to knead milk containers.
5. As heat rises, plunge banana deep into mixing bowl and cover with nuts, leave to soak (preferably NOT overnight).
6. The cake is done when banana is... Continue»
Such situations are definitely not uncommon. Many people who are in long-term relationships do encounter this phase. So why don't you plan some exotic surprises for your partner? Such that he's taken off guard and left asking for more.
Surprises need not necessarily be really pricey. What matters the most is your attitude, the way you show your concern and express your love towards your mate. Here are some innovative ideas...
Men love it when their ladylove makes an extra effort to seduce their senses. All you need to do is to think out of the box!
Sangeeta Ahlawat, a HR... Continue»
Here is my story to answer a curious person on my blog at ifounddaddy.tumblr.com:
asked: yeah i think u should let your friend your worship your pussy and how is your friend going to worship your pussy? did the guy fuck u really good? [He is referencing another guy I fucked earlier that day in the second question.]
Me: Thanks for keeping my tumblr fresh with some stories I might not have told, and drawing all the details out. You are in for some loooong answers.
Well, turns out that I did see my friend. How does he worship it, well, he starts by letting... Continue»
'Come on, what's so terrible about a young woman love of a man's Penis?'
I personally love the feel of one, especially when it lies in my hand.
The potential it bears as it lies on my hand, drooping gently over my hand's length, watching the purplish glans become exposed as the foreskin miraculously peels back, an involuntary action, due to it's owner contemplating my excitement' and as it hardens, it's an example of positive feedback.
Soon fully erect and it rises from my hand and assumes an incredible angle, I note a single dew-drop of seminal fluid leaks from its tiny slit, I look up a... Continue»
This story is similar to other one You can see and is set like the cinema of the saga of "Star Trek" - so imagine in practice the same customs and the same atmosphere - and it's the story of an interplanetary voyage, with a few differences ... . that this will never find the movie or the text of it.
Chapter 1) THE DEPARTURE
It describes the journey of the "USS INTERPRIK" - starship ship in the same class as the best known "USS ENTERPRISE", but this is more modern and spacecraft that made a mysterious journey, a secret mission which for various reasons never ended for be described elsewhe... Continue»
1. When we talk 'listen', it shows us that you care about our feelings.
2. Men should be smart enough and understand that not all our bad moods are connected to PMS-ing.
3. Guys, developing an EQ (Emotional quotient) would help. That however, does not mean that they need to cry at the drop of a hat, it just means you need to be more sensitive towards us.
4. With women communication is the key, so try and talk to us often.
5. Here are some traits we wish men would display – chivalry, making an extra effort with our friends and f****y, because we do the same!
6. Cook for us o... Continue»
Warning: This story is not greatly sexual in nature. you been warned
As I walked gracefully up the steps towards the grand manor. I looked at katherine a moment. she smiled walking along side me. The nervousness swelled as we came closer and closer to the mansion. I felt butterflys pulling katana's and slashing away at my insides. but then again, as I touched my tummy I remembered the corset redesigning my lungs. I pinched at my blue belled dress with designs of the ocean and seashells imprinted in its laces. Katherine wore a pink dress with cherry blossom flowers imprinted ... Continue»
man that was one hellava night the sex was priceless ,the sl**p extra well rested lol.I expected sex what i did not expect was a good fucking like that she was a pro when she bent over thats all she wrote.Recovering i decided to take a shower when i heard a lil laugh , see i was in the bed contenplaton when that laugh that i keep hearing became louder "HOLY SHIT" she was in the bed laying with me the whole time reminising i had not got up to piss or any thing i simply opened my eyes and started to think she popped her head up from the covers and said great sex hun? I replied yes ver... Continue»
If you want a repeat performance from your lady friend, it might be a good idea to tap into your sensitive side and step your cuddle game up. Psychologist Susan Hughes said:
“Females placed an overall great importance than did males on all five items measured: intimate talking, kissing, cuddling and caressing, professing their love for their partner and talking about the relationship after sex. In contrast, men placed more importance on gaining extrinsic rewards after sex.”
And these extrinsic rewards include cigarettes, booze, etc.
So what is to be gained from this study (that survey... Continue»
Im Hausflur begegnete mir mal meine Nachbarin, sie ist schon etwas reifer, deshalb aber keineswegs unattraktiv, sie strahlt einfach dieses Frauliche aus, kein Mädchen mehr. Wie ich anhand ihrer Einkaustüten sah, war sie auf dem Weg zum Supermarkt, da mein Auto derzeit etwas fahruntüchtig ist, fragte ich frecher Weise, mit einem sympathischen Lächeln, ob sie mich mitnehmen würde. Sie freute sich, da das Einkaufen an sich, ja eher langweiliger Natur ist, halt ein notgedrungenes Unterfangen. Ich brauchte nicht viel, so waren wir mehr mit ihren Sachen beschäftigt, als mit meinen. Wir alb
I try balancing the laptop on my knees as my left hand fumbles through my underwear, fumbling to get a hold of my hard cock to free him from the tighter and tighter confines of my boxer-briefs. All the while, my right hand clicks furiously on the left button of the mouse -- trying to find a pornographic scene that I am satisfied will put me over the top. A scene that is not too long but not too short. A scene that will not only keep my dick hard but also make me so hot, that I will cum like I have never cum before. After clicking through several porn scenes of various genres of perversions, I ... Continue»
This is not a story, but hopefully a fun way to determine Who you really are and Why?
Wife who sucks dick or slut that swallows it?
Wife who loves to be eaten or slut who masturbates while being bitten
Wife who wants to be held or slut that likes to be spanked
Wife who complains about the size of her ass or slut that squeals in delight while willingly being taken from behind...
Who are you? Wife, Slut or Slut-Wife... Continue»
Mona Lindley, 29, single, international sales manager, travels a lot. She doesn't like men too much, despises kissing, is disgusted by touching dicks and hates warm sperm trickling down her thighs. But she uses men for her sexual satisfaction, and should there be none around her at the moment, she endulges always in her own erotic fantasies!
The golden sun sinks tired into the soft bed of clouds and the veil of the night draws over it to keep him warm. The contant vibration and the numbing hum of the heavy jet engines are lulling my senses. I made a bit of small talk with the guy next to ... Continue»
FUCKING: two or more people engaging in sex, without having any meaning
Fuck in its literal meaning refers to the act of sexual intercourse. It is an English word that is almost universally considered vulgar. It is often used as a profanity, either to denote disdain or as an intensifier
SLUT: Something I like to be....a term applied to an individual who is considered to have loose sexual morals
WHORE: Something I'm not, but to some people I am...a prostitute or promiscuous woman
I do not take money for sex, but sometimes I wonder if I should...I'd love to have my own place, so t... Continue»
She was so warm, wet and willing as I eased into her after some serious stroking and arousal. I was standing tall and stiff, dribbling my juices as I got ready to dive in...
Then I awakened from my wet dream to find my appendage slowly waking up. I was still stiff and ready but I was just morning wood - too bad Big Head didn't score a warm fuzzy snatch for me to perform with, but that's not unusual. Me, I can make a woman moan but Big Head keeps blowing it so I spend too many nights just flopping around.
Now the big appendage that carries me around is up and headed for the bathroom. ... Continue»
None of my friends liked Dibs, I don't even
think they knew his real name, just the stupid
nickname some sarcastic teacher gave him.
Dibs was very quiet, never spoke much, seemed to
have no friends. None except me that is. My friends
made fun of him, teased him or ignored him. Well
everyone did really. But I liked him. I liked his
resilience, never seeming to care that he wasn't
part of the social scene. I liked the way that he
was so much clever than everyone, including the teachers
but he was never arrogant. In fact he tried to hide
his intelligence sensing that it ... Continue»
I want to give out a little information before I write this story! My name is Kirk Parmer and I moved to Texas 6 years ago in April and I came from Alaska. I was born and raised in Alaska for 15 years and that is why I have the username Alaska. The xxx is because I like porn! Now this story is titled Kirk & Erin because this is like a parody of the biblical story of Adam & Eve. This story is going to be better though because its going to have sex in it! I hope you will enjoy this and please comment!