Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 69
(This is the first erotic story I ever attempted)
I woke up untangled myself from our embrace and went to quietly have a shower and get all cleaned up while you slumbered on lost into the land of dreams.
I quietly sneak back into bed stretching luxuriously loving the feeling of being all fresh and clean. It must have been some dream you were having as I noticed a tent in the sheet as quietly as I could I wriggled down to the end of the bed and gently pushed you onto your back, waited a few moments for you to settle back into deep sl**p, I gently made room between your legs my hair ... Continue»
Now her new boyfriend is really, really annoyed about this blog about Sarah, my ex-girlfriend, so lets’ keep it going by another story about the horny bitch.
We were on holiday, somewhere on the Canary Islands. Lanzarote, I think. Two things happened on the holiday that her new boyfriend will hate to read about. I got a bit sunburnt one day, so the next day I couldn’t stay out in the sun too much. We were in a hotel room that overlooked some gardens with a lot of grassy areas and a few ponds. We had gone out to sunbath in the area of the gardens we could see from our room and after S... Continue»
I was taking a walk one spring evening in the hills behind my house. When I rounded a bend, a strange sight suddenly confronted me: a man in bright colored clothing was coming towards me. When he saw me, he made an exaggerated stop and promptly walked up to me and pulled a flower from behind my ear. He gave it to me with an elaborate bow, then beckoned me to follow him. By now, this strange clown had caught my interest, so I was more than willing to follow him. I have been fascinated by clowns since I was a k**, and this one wasn’t bad to look at either.
He led me to a wooded, seclude... Continue»
Last year, around Christmas time, I was back on the East
Coast for Christmas break. I had borrowed my b*****r's new
Corvette, (b*****r is a newly licensed physician) and headed out
to a Christmas party in the Highlands. This was the first time I
had been separated from my SO in a year, so I guess I was feeling
a little unattached.
I got to the party and it was wonderful. I had a couple of
champagnes and danced away most of the night. At 1 am my ex-
boyfriend from high school came in with his newly acquired
fiance. I hadn't seen Danny in 3 years, and I was a little taken
Christmas is a time of joy and happiness, OR boredom and loneliness.
Let me back up a bit, Christmas time, three years ago, sometime during the night, my cock was running in and out of Anna's pussy. It was all wet down there, well lubricated and it was fun. I was kissing her shoulder, fiddling her titties and ramming her pussy with my cock. Back, forth, back, forth, ... Anna turns over, she kisses me on the lips and starts sucking them. I am fingering her around her butt hole and spreading her butt cheeks while pushing her lower body to rub her pussy on my body. We didn't do it anally excep... Continue»
An Italian man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a nearby table. ...Alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for the most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her, knowing that if she accepts it, she will be his. The waiter gets the bottle and quickly takes it to her saying who it came from. She looks at the bottle and decides to send a note over to the man. The note said "For me to accept this bottle, you must have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank , and 7 inches in your pants.." ... Continue»
Right hand, left lane
A little poem of love for
a teen driving dangerously
Right hand driving
Fast, hence left lane
On the road again
From West to East
From Left to Right
And back again
High speed, I know
Your little secret
It´s the hole in your pocket.
I know you did it on purpose.
Irish red-head swinging to the East.
Singing a song of love and longing.
Who are you? Old enough to drive?
A sexy hole in your pocket.
So you can drive very fast?
Your button of love
I know your dirty little secret.
You press your special button
All th... Continue»
(Mature lady takes on two)
As I went to get us a nightcap I saw the barman glance across to Eileen and smile. I followed his gaze to see that Eileen had apparently carelessly allowed her skirt to ride up over her stocking tops and as she uncrossed her legs was giving him and I a good stretch of creamy thigh and a flash of her newly shaven pussy. She smiled when she saw us glancing across and slowly crossed her legs to leave her short tight black skirt still a good few inches short of her lace top hold-ups.
As he gave me our drinks he smiled and said" you are a lucky man". I realised this... Continue»
I'll start by saying, I have been in the local BDSM Scene now for some 20 odd years, about 3 years back, at HF, I was to cane a real pain puppy, as this was something she had worked herself up to for 8 weeks, the deal was I would give her 250 strokes, what I didn't know at the time was, she had a gf from another city with her that night.
This gf is now my collared slave, my property. All that happened that night at our first meeting was I gave her a very nice little spanking on the A-Frame.
We hit it off very well after that, some 6 months later I made the offer of giving her my Collar
Okay so I have been thinking about it for a while but today I did it, I went into the premises and up the stairs and waited my turn.
A gorgeous young lady beckoned me in to a room where I took clothes off, not all of them, just some.
Then she sat me in a reclining chair and started to play with my nipples! Now I do not get a hard on nowadays but I definitely got a flicker in the knickers so to speak.
She very carefully massaged one and then the other and did all manner of horny things with her hands.
Then after a moment or two she smiled nicely at me and 'HOLY FUCKING OUCH!!' That... Continue»
The Naughty neighbor affair...
The apartment was all quiet ,I was home all alone for the day.. I was wandering what
I could do to keep my self entertained? Hmmm I thought "Booty call" I decided
to text my neighbor since he was off work and see if he was tied up with the wife
or see if he had some free time for some fun... fingers crossed.. he was was free
and he could stop by ... my body began to tingle with anticipating his reply ,
than my phone buzzed and he said yeah he was free he stop by after lunch
which certainly put a smile on my face, so I went up and ... Continue»
12.00am - I was in the bathroom and I placed the weapons in the holdall of our backpacks. "We have got to get this right!" commanded one girlfriend. Another one of my girlfriends sat in the reclining chair, pondering. "Having second thoughts?" "Me? no way" said another one of my girlfriends. "Its pay back". I stepped out of the bathroom and ushered the girls to the door. There were four of us.
12.30am - It was night and the air was cool. We pulled up outside John Rosh Avenue, near the Olympic Park, in London,. Very quietly, we approached No 41, pulled on our stockings over our head... Continue»
This is only part of a WORK IN PROGRESS
As the singer was exhorting the crowd to take part, she took three steps in my direction and smiled even more. She said the line perfectly in tune "I looked at you" and I answered, "You looked at me" and we both laughed. Another miracle, this was a girl who liked The Doors almost as much as I did. “I smiled at you," she said, and again I answered, "You smiled at me." At the exact moment the band on stage finished their intro to the war song both of us sang together, "And we're on OUR way."
Everyone in the crowd heard it and wonde... Continue»
Hi this is Rishi, age 23 from Mumbai; my height is 6.1 ft. I have a 6 inches long dick and it’s a little broad as said by my earlier gfs. This story is about me and a friend of mine named “Jyoti”.’She was with me in my degree college. She is 24 yrs old.5.3 in height a little on the bulkier side with assets of 38d 32 36 the best part about her is her boobs their shape can be easily seen through her top. I don’t think she might have ever worn a plain bra there were always fancy designs on her cups with different colors and which
I knew it was danny’s last night in town. I wanted to make it special. It was his idea to go see a play at a fancy theater. My dad was a douchebag about some issues. Trust me I still got away with murder. He was old fashioned about making me wait until I was sixteen to have my first real date. I hated him for that shit. I was not your average k**. I had a huge secret. Right after I turned f******n my dad got me a job at the restaurant where he worked. It was all kinds of i*****l and corrupt. People thought I was a slacker in my advanced classes. Nearly every weeknight I worked from... Continue»
There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day.
The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it.
Doctor: What was the problem?
Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mo... Continue»
My hands were shaking at the anticipation, she grabbed the back of my neck and brought me in for another deep kiss, my fingers danced lightly over the mounds of her boobs grazing the hard nipples as my hand got closer to her glistening thighs. I moved my hands over her pussy lips. Wet doesn’t even get close to describing her. This girl was hot and dying for some hard cock to make her scream. Her back arched as I lightly moved her wet lips apart, her panty gusset was soaked through with it as I dragged them off her, her ass raising in the air to help giving me a waft of her pu... Continue»
That was winter days and she came from England after having vacations. Her house was in front row and there was a single street between our homes. In our area houses are quite big and no one knows that what is happening in someone’s home. My f****y has good terms with her f****y and we usually visit each other. This time she was alone and her daughters remained there and she came for selling her home. For this purpose she told my mom that she wants me to do this job as I have sound contacts in area. I readily accepted this assignment and met with her in her home. We were alone and she was tell... Continue»
A long time ago, I had the dubious honor of working as a cook at Sugar’s. The club was billed as a gentlemen's cabaret, although even back when the neighborhood was more prosperous the joint was always a bit seedy. Any building without windows and smoking allowed inside can’t help but turn into a den of ill repute.
The kind of place you’d see a midget cock slapped in the face by a giant lemon horse dick.
I myself was just another face back in the kitchen, where I started as a dishwasher and slowly learned how to cook everything the club had to offer. For the most part we were faceless, ... Continue»
Long time no see! I’ve finally ‘got my arse in gear’ and feel inspired to write. The only problem was, because it has been a while what should I blog about? After some careful consideration I thought it only polite to keep you all up to date with ‘recent events’ so to speak lol.
I suppose the best place to start (as with all stories)is from the beginning. I had been chatting to a chap, lets call him Colin (rhyming slang ‘Colin Firth’ - girth ;-P) for a short while, when the delightful boy suggested we meet. Now a lot of the people I talk to either play around with the ide... Continue»