Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 67

Disgraceful soft sex with my cousin

This is not exaggeration, this is based on my story of 1993. I feel
ashamed, cause she my cousin s****r. I shouldn't have done this to
her. I am from South Tamil Nadu.
It was in my semester vacation of my first year, and she was studying
Ninth Std. It all started from this point, in the night before my
s****r's marriage, she looked as if an angel. She is a medium
complexion, but...but really beautiful mean it. She was wearing silk
blow and the bottom (pattu pavadai). I was instructed to look after
the k**s who were playing on the Marriage's hall terrace. I saw my
cousin s****r playing... Continue»
Posted by Zz611 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Daily Commute

This is my first story and not much of a writer but had an interesting incident this morning so I thought I'd share with you all.

I commute daily from home to work by train like most people living in Japan.
As you all may know, the trains are crammed during rush hour and your touching someone's back or shoulder.

It's like being in a can of sardines.

Anyway, so I get on the train this morning and like always it is crammed.

It is filled with sweaty men and I have been living in Japan for about 6 years now but still can't get used to having a sweaty guys back rubbing against my back.... Continue»
Posted by drpepper23 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Getting Caught

I was chatting with a fellow xhamster member, sharing experiences, and when I told about this one, she said I had to post it for everyone to read. Hope you like it as much as she did!

I met this guy on a gay site, and we chatted for a bit before setting up a meeting at his place. We both had a panty fetish and he told me he loved to sniff his 19yr old duaghter's and his wife's, and said it would be hot to watch me sniff them as he blew me. I agreed and we met the next day. His wife was at work, and his daughter, who was home for the summer from college, was meetining friends at t... Continue»
Posted by panteeluvr 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
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Carrots

Carrots
by jjcole©

A lost art, whittling. Passed on from father to son, though in my f****y it had skipped a generation. I learned it from my grandfather. My father thought of it as a waste of time. Granddad taught me to use it as a thinking tool.

I had been doing this it seemed all my life. I would go to the backyard with a block of soft wood and my sharpened pocketknife and work problems through my head. Sometimes I would just daydream. The thinking and daydreams would end when the block of wood had become a discernible object. Over the years I had become good enough that some of my w... Continue»
Posted by colejj 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Dennis The Menace: - Alice, The Mardi Gras Gang-b

Dennis The Menace: - Alice, The Mardi Gras Gang-bang Whore
by Sniper32

At a collage in California, three sorority s****rs were sitting around in
there bedroom talking. "Finals are done, so where are we going to go for
Spring Break this year?" Blondie asked.

"Well there's Tijuana or Cancun" Rita said.

"How about skiing in Aspen, that would be fun, or we could go to Ft.
Lauderdale, but that's a pretty wild place" Alice said shyly.

"We've been to Tijuana dozens of times, Cancun was fun until we drank the
water and all got sick, and Ft. Lauderdale was a blast last year, but ... Continue»
Posted by sniper32 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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you can learn a lot from a tutor

It was my third year of university, in the field of immunology, and i was sitting in my tutorial. It was my only class for the friday, so i was relatively awake.the course itself wasnt overly difficult, it was merely a lot to remember. I was sitting in my tutorial, looking at my fellow classmates, nothing over the top, just average people, more guys than anything. there was however a rather cute asian girl sitting to my left. with long flowing black hair, framing a slightly tanned face. her tits were small, as most asian girls are, her legs however were heaven, long, slender and completely hai... Continue»
Posted by jpvk123 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Top 10 porn myths.

10 - High Heels.
Women wear high heels to bed.

9 - Going Down
When going down on a woman, 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.

8 - Ugly Middle-Aged Men
Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men.

7 - Suck It
When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to "suck it".

6 - Busted
When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking the both of you.

5 - Oh Yeah
Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum.

4 - Enjoyable Sexual Practice
A common and enjoyable sexual practice ... Continue»
Posted by diriculous 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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THE ITALIAN.....

When reading this it must be read with a ITALIAN ACCENT....



One day I go to Toronto and stay in a bigga hotel.
I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I wanna two
pissa toast. She bring me only one piss.
I tella her I wanna two piss; she say, go to toilet - I say, you no
understand, I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you betta no piss on
plate, you sonna ma b*tch! I don't even know lady, she calla me somma
ma b*tch.
Then I go to pharmacia with a cougha. The man he give me candy ana
tell me fa cough! - I don't even know man ana he tella me FA COUGH!
Lat... Continue»
Posted by papa61 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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hot white woman gets five black cocks!!!!!

This is the third story on Lynette, the hot white woman from the gym. Guess you can say this is a trilogy. ha ha (first was Giving a Hot White Woman Her First Black Cock" and second was "Motel Rendevous."

This past weekend was real interesting, really interesting. Friday I met a damn hot lady something might be, yea, just might be about to happen there. Saturday night I sat in some real good seats at the Braves game as they beat the Giants and made a new friend for sure. Somebody familiar might end up on my football team.
Sunday, yea baby! Sunday!!!! I got my boys together for Lynette’s al... Continue»
Posted by adam2010 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Rachael - The Babysitter

"Mais maman!" Je plaidé. "Je ne ai pas besoin d'une baby-sitter! Je ne peux pas simplement rester moi-même cette fois? »Mais elle ne bougeait pas. Pour l'amour de Pete, je avais quatorze ans. Tout simplement parce que mes parents ont dû sortir de la ville pour le week-end, pourquoi ai-je avoir quelqu'un rester avec moi comme si je étais un petit enfant!

«Regardez Jeff, je ai entendu tout ce que je vais vous entendre. Je reçois la fille de Mme Walker, Rachel de rester avec vous, et ce est tout ce qu'il ya à faire. »Puis sa voix se adoucit un peu. "Ecoute chérie, ce ne est pas que nous ne vou... Continue»
Posted by kristak 11 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  
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Two’s Company

She lies on her belly. Her legs are long, like two-thirds the length of the couch. Jesus, what legs. They start perfectly at her white anklets and then rise and rise and just artfullyassemble themselves into a perfectfucking ass. She has the kind of ass that’s bulbous without being a bulb. It’s a half-an-apple ass, a narrow-but-squeezable, humpty-buttock, soft and girly ass. She crosses her ankles and bends her knees so her feet drop almost down to the scallop, the cut-off in the faded frazzle-legged denim that rides up higher than her panty lines….

“Gloria,” I sa... Continue»
Posted by Julian_LoveYou 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy

Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy
Written by irish4skin
Starring
Mandy Muffin as herself
Josephine James as herself T-Girl Candy Surprise as herself
MILF Delilah as Linda Herrin T-Girl Carla Novaes as herself
Corina Curves as Dr. Carolyn Dick T-Girl Elisangel as herself
Donita Dunes as herself Sasha Grey as herself
T-Girl Adriana Rodriguez as Salina T-Girl Mariana Cordoba as Sama... Continue»
Posted by icemanrisen 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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The maid of the mannor

Ann worked as a scullery maid; all of her memories involve working in kitchens, cleaning pots, scrubbing floors and preparing a****ls, her mother had become ill and was bed ridden. Ann stood scrubbing the pots from Lord Thompson’s dinner; she heard his deep voice as he spoke to the doctor watching over Ann’s mother. Ann began to hear them both walking down the stairs and the front door open and close as the doctor left, she was deeply worried about her mother and started to scrub the post as hard as she could to take her mind off it. Ann scrubbed harder but her elbow smacked into the clean po... Continue»
Posted by Red555 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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SUCKING DICK & SWALLOWING JIZZ

I read this profile online one day and it quoted an article about sucking dick and swallowing jizz. I wish that I had seen it many many years ago. I could have shown it to my wife as an inducement for her to give me head, like when we were single and she was trying to persuade me to marry her!
The author is unknown to me, however, I think it's worth sharing, so here it is:
Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND among people suffering from depression, many felt much better after sucking a Dick. This is because Dick juice contains a protein that the body converts into se... Continue»
Posted by bobapple 4 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Becoming my bosses

My name is jess I'm a account ex. at a good frim I have been here about 5yrs. at 28 yrs. old I would say that being 5'8" and only 108lbs. 34c and not what most people would say stuning I've done pretty good this job a loving hubby and my little 4yr. old son.

So here is how it happen Tony (my boss) and myself were working on an account very hard late nites and long hard days this account could be the begining of something great to the frim so it was a must do sort of thing, after three weeks of this we findly came up with the right campain for the client and it felt great, The frim was... Continue»
Posted by shotguner 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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1night

going out to the bar was something i didnt do often. I usually was a more reserved type of guy .So on this night i dont know what lead me to a strip bar but there i was with a facefull of tittys and ass and throwing back shots of henny when suddenly i was approached by this beatiful woman by the name of red you see this woman was not any ordainary woman this woman knew what she wanted and knew what she liked she was a freak im talking the true def.....of nasty, sheliked objects in her ass she liked to be slapped and called a stank nasty cunt she was really into shit like that and it turned me ... Continue»
Posted by dblac2 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Massage with a Happy Ending.

It’s been a rough couple weeks as being new parents the stress is really getting to us. With no time for fun times and me generally feeling down so getting a break is a rare thing.

Arriving late afternoon tension is high having had a harsh discussion earlier on in the week and just not feeling the love seeing bappy was something that I wasn’t overly excited about, that was until our wee one was babysat by his mammy that evening.

Now for the readers who know us better through our past stories passion is usually big between us because I don’t “diy” and I wait until I’m with him before pl... Continue»
Posted by maaao 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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The teacher and the student - Part 3 (A loving tri

I had an appointment with Nanci scheduled for late Tuesday afternoon.
She was stressed-out and there was no reason to prolong her agony over her grades, and I was going to let her off the hook.
Even knowing that my coed selection had already been made for the year and she was no longer a possibility, Nanci still made me silently gasp as she walked through the door, and I could see the truly radiant beauty that she was. Even with her eyes downcast and a frown on her face, she was gorgeous.

After she was seated, I explained that I had been watching her progress in class and on the essays... Continue»
Posted by elausente 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Booty Inspector of the Old West (part 1)

[Tune in tomorrow evening for Part 2 of THE BOOTY INSPECTOR]


Intro:
The man walked into the room with a shotgun raised over his head and shouted "Now, ah'm only goanna repeat myself one Mo' time! I want all you men ta' lay down yous'n weapons and all you Womanfolk to drop down yours'n panties and pull on up dem skirts, because I here am the Booty Inpsector and I've come to inspect yours'n booties!"

And so the rise of Fame and Legend was given to the Old West's first and only "Booty Inspector" who hijacked trains and banks only to inspect womenfolk’s' Booties, at gunpoin... Continue»
Posted by markfayer 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The Affairs

Introduction: not so sexy


> The 1st Affair
>
> A married man was having an affair
> with his secretary.
> One day they went to her place
> and made love all afternoon.
> Exhausted, they fell asl**p
> and woke up at 8 PM ..
> The man hurriedly dressed
> and told his lover to take his shoes
> outside and rub! them in the grass and dirt.
> He put on his shoes and drove home.
> "Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
> "I can't lie to you," he replied,
> "I'm having an affair with my secretary.
> We had sex all afternoon."
> She looked down at his shoes and said:
> ... Continue»
Posted by PornApocalypse 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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