Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 67

Dumb? but I am not blond

During my freshmen year in High School I was new to this country. I didn't much about it. My f****y had just moved from Mexico to California and we had no clue how different things worked here, and how similiar were other things. When I was living in Mexico we had no money, but every month my mom managed to pay the rent. A man would come in every first of the month and ask for the money. My mom would ask me to go to my room. Then she would walk to the guy to her room and after two hours he would leave the house. So happy that he would forget to ask for the money. Back then I had no idea what r... Continue»
Posted by latintetas 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Dogging Mistress from out of space !

I'd never held with all that conspiracy theory; sure I'd watched star trek, sure I could do the Vulcan sign, and if Captain kirk pyjamas make me a geek, then I'm a geek. But I'd never really believed it was true; all the flying saucer and alien a*****ion brigade, screwballs and fruitcakes..... or that's what I thought, but not now, not after what happened last night, not anymore, now I'm a believer b*****rs and s****rs. Because last night my girlfriend fucked and an alien, and I think I may have sucked its cock.

Picture the scene if you will; it's an overcast muggy, sweaty night at our loca... Continue»
Posted by FannyandNobby 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Karma is a Bitch

Over a span of a couple of years, Dave had a few more flings and he came to the realization that, for the most part, pussy is all the same. It really comes down to one’s presentation and enthusiasm. His wife, Cindi, was a good woman. With a weight loss plan and some weekly exercise, she got thin, fit and feeling pretty good about herself. She really became the most beautiful mother of 3 you could ever have laid eyes on. Dave was feeling guilty for some of the things he had done and he hoped to live a better life. He got the f****y going to a small church in town. That church had an ... Continue»
Posted by morelead 6 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Top Clues that your Woman Is Cheating On You

Short of walking in on your wife or girlfriend doing unspeakable things with another dude, there's no foolproof way to know if she's cheating on you. But there are clues — thing is, you probably don't notice any of them.

But we know two guys who do — in fact, it's their job. Between them, Christopher Paoletti, president of Infidelity Investigations LLC, and Tony DeLorenzo, co-author of The 28 Tell-Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse, they have about 45 years of experience hunting down cheaters. So we asked them to tell us what sort of behavior is a tip of that a woman might be cheating on you.
... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Does Your Girl Clean Your Cock?

Standing in the doorway to my apartment with Becs, I think back to meeting her for the first time. I'd been playing pool with Brian, my at-the-time and current roommate, in our dorm's community room, which looked like a huge living room furnished with the same aqua blue tables and chairs we had in our rooms, a flat screen TV, couches everywhere, and a ratty old pool table. I'd gotten a game in pretty much every day that year, our freshman year, and was getting to be okay. Becs, or Rebecca as she called herself then, came by with some girl she was rushing with, I forget her name, and started ta... Continue»
Posted by PureCoffee 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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forbidden

I came home from school today to find the house empty, where was mum, I went to the back door and saw her in the garden. sunbathing, I stepped out towards her and noticed she was naked so I stopped. As I gazed at her I saw she was lying on her back on the lawn with her legs spread wide and held in the air, her hand reached between her legs and was moving up and down. Then I heard her talking to herself. " Fuck me, Fuck me, fuck me johnny. thats it fuck my ass, fuck your mummy." I stepped forward and spoke, "mummy" "yes Johnny" your a bit noisy today remember the n... Continue»
Posted by celcus 6 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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What the Hell

Well Came home from work early the other day and caught my bitch cheating for the second time.. And this time with her Uncle.. No shit well he was married to her aunt at one time no bl**d there but still nasty as fuck if you ask me.. But thru it all I kept a level head cause we have a 1yr girl together...and Was not about to ruin me being in her life because her mother is a stupid whore.. My first thought was to snap and kill them to be honest.. But That would serve no purpose.. I instead did the right thing and was very polite and killed them with kindness.. They did me a favoe if tyou ask me... Continue»
Posted by steven6977 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Excited wet dream.

I went to see my male physiologist to talk about the wet dream I were having. Here, how I had explained the dream: 'I was playing a role as a sexy housewife to my husband, wearing nothing underneath my bathrobe. I’ve just finish taking a hot bubble bath, my pussy was still soaking and wet, and, my husband is lying on the bed watching TV with his dick stand out of his underpants. I took off my bathrobe, walk over to my husband, begin to suck on his hard rock dick, I suck his dick like a lollipop; I can feel his dickhead going toward my deep throat. Slurping, and licking on his dick nice and fas... Continue»
Posted by Darkpussy 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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atlantic city sex show

i was born in new jersey, grown up in new jersey and never ever ever left new jersey. why you ask. don't drive and no one drive me. trenton is where i am and will be always. at 67 old i want go to atlantic city. my landlord say's dudley, you want to go for ride to casinos and i want. so it happened. he drive and i so happy and tell him i got no money. he know because he get my disability check for rent. he say dudley, no worry, i help you but you have to pay back. i say i no want gamble, i want pussy. after long drive in middle i got go pp. we stop and i go pee. then i hungry and want burger a... Continue»
Posted by Dudley_Flem_Fartner 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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THE STRANGEST JIGSAW PUZZLE

THE STRANGEST JIGSAW PUZZLE
It was on the top shelf on an old bookcase, covered with dust and barely visible. Lisa decided she had to find out what it was. Of all the things in the old junk shop, it aroused her curiosity most. She had looked through old books, prints, and postcards for hours. Nothing had caught her interest. Now the old box, high and out of reach, intrigued her. She looked around for the old man who ran the store. But he had gone into the back room. She saw a stepladder across the room and brought it over to the bookcase. It shook on the uneven floorboards as she climbed to t... Continue»
Posted by JASON4VOORHEES2 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Supersex with co- worker

One Friday after work, we were all from the office and had a single beer. As people disappeared, only Suzanne and me back.

My name is Torben and late thirties and Susan are a couple of years younger. We are both married and have c***dren, but there has always been a little electricity between us.

It has never translated into anything, but as we got a few beers, I could see that Suzanne became more and more unrestrained.

At one point she comes little dancing over to me and lose completely random balance, so she has to sit on my lap. I put my arms around her waist and hold on tight so s... Continue»
Posted by Rumleskaft1984 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Camp Dsvid

Camp David


I met him on a train. I was working on my laptop, and he walked past. He was incredibly fashionable and everything he had on looked like it had come out of the pack moments before. He had rather a sharp nose which was the only masculine thing that stood out. stood out through his hair. He wore very tight narrow legged black trousers, very highly polished pointy shoes, and a short tweed coat with sleeves so narrow you would have to have pipe cleaner arms to get it on. The coat was open at the neck, exposing a bright green/blue jumper, and beneath that a bare and hairless ... Continue»
Posted by lyn_hornygirl 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy

Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy
Written by irish4skin
Starring
Mandy Muffin as herself
Josephine James as herself T-Girl Candy Surprise as herself
MILF Delilah as Linda Herrin T-Girl Carla Novaes as herself
Corina Curves as Dr. Carolyn Dick T-Girl Elisangel as herself
Donita Dunes as herself Sasha Grey as herself
T-Girl Adriana Rodriguez as Salina T-Girl Mariana Cordoba as Sama... Continue»
Posted by icemanrisen 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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Temp Job (You'll like it...it's the best

Temp job as limo driver has definite benefits...a celebrity story...

Temp Job (You'll like it...it's the best)

I have a confession to make. They say confession is good for the soul, so here I am. Now that I am this hot sex fantasy writer on this sex fantasy website, people have been expecting me to keep coming up with hot stories. But the truth of the matter is, my sex life has not really been all that exciting. If I had to write the Kama Sutra it would only be one page. In 48 years on the planet, I really have not had that many exciting sexual experiences. I already told y... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  
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College seems GREAT!

So it goes like this, I was in my gf's s****rs house. Shes a college student and so shares it with three other girls. Well it was one night upon which we decided to vist her and go out with them all. We were told to use her s****rs room to change and so we did, my gf showered first and as she did, I started being nosey and looking through her s****rs things, but guess what, I found nothing worth noting (was looking to see if she had a dildo etc....) This was shocking as I presumed she would have had one, suddenly I heard my gf coming across the landing floor so i jumped onto the bed and lay do... Continue»
Posted by aaronlikesit 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Anniversary

Nicole stared out the window, her smiling reflection staring back. The Sun had just gone behind the buildings, but had not yet set. That wouldn't be for another hour. The anticipation for the evening had been growing in her for almost a week, when she found out that the bistro would be hosting a very private party, and that she had been specifically requested to serve the party. The guests would be arriving soon.

The table that had been requested was a small two-top near the centre of the small 15 table room. Nicole wondered why one of the more private booths near the rear of the bistro had... Continue»
Posted by mustbtuesday 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The Layover

Stephen Brooks, a rather average sort of fella on the wrong side of 30 slowly opened the door of his Towncar and ducked out into the muggy afternoon air of Dallas Texas. Before him was the Airport and annoyingly beyond that a five hour plane flight back to New York.

As he grabbed his bags from the trunk it dawned on him that he had in all likelihood spent more time in the air in the past month then birds do in their entire lives.
Stephen was in Dallas overseeing the construction of a new Distribution hub for his Company and at the end of the week would fly back home to New York to give in... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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A YOUNG SOLACE

b*****r of my late grandfather had a house at the seaside. I’ve bee spending free summer vacations there since I was k**. He and his wife were retired and had a nice house in a quiet neighborhood of the town. I would spend whole day at he beach, hanging with local k**s and exploring the nature and landscapes.
I was having another beautiful month of a summer holydays there. Unfortunately, my grandmother (wife of my grandfather’s b*****r; I called them ’grandpa’ and ’grandma’) started to have a hard time with her rheumatism and arthritis, so her daughter found her a parlormaid. The maid was ki... Continue»
Posted by JohnDough11111 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Lady Luck - A Somewhat True Story

Couldn't believe my luck tonight....after a long day of masturbating, and flirting or sexting with random women on either Facebook, xHamster, or Yahoo, I went to my local liquor store to pick up some rum and Coke at 10 o'clock tonight....it's in a strip mall, and as I was winding my way through the convoluted parking lot to get to the liquor store at the end of the complex, I passed a petite white girl, looked to be in her mid-20's. It's cold here this time of year, so I couldn't see a whole lot of her figure, but I could tell she had some curves under her peacoat and faded jeans. I only caugh... Continue»
Posted by femalesonly 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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I bet he won't do this again







lilbigal 2 minutes ago.

Delete

She is a 22 years old single, bisexual female

I was at this club the other night and I noticed this guy staring at me. He was very cute but with another girl. Everytime she wasn't looking at him he would look over at me and give me the lets fuck look. I was sitting at a table where he could see me spreading and then closing my legs wide for him. I love teasing guys and girls. When his gf got up to go do something he looked over and I spread my legs and ran my middle finger up and down a few times on my blue jeaned slit, and then licked my f... Continue»
Posted by lilbigal 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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