Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 66

Story Circle: Catching Someone Else

I posted about being caught "in the act" a while back and got some great stories but some people were asking about catching other people while doing the deed. I have also done this and would love to share stories about how you have caught someone else masturbating. My first story is one that I shared a while back but removed because it had been posted for a long time and I wanted to start the blog section fresh but its a good story and deserves to be here. It happened when I was in high school.
I was dating a girl named Sarah who lived just out of town and the trips out there were costing a s... Continue»
Posted by robyngoodfello 15 days ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Unique Tattooing

(Ann gets inked in an intimate area)

"Unique tattooing, can I help you?" David answered the ringing phone. "Hi David, this is Ann. Do you have any time to squeeze me in today?" she asked, cheerfully.

A huge smile flashed across David's already darkly handsome face when he heard her voice. Ann.... Her golden hair, long legs and chubby body just made his senses soar, not to mention his heart race every time she smiled at him. She had a smile that would melt the polar ice caps, and bring blinding light to darkened catacombs. He loved tattooing her as well, she never complained of the pain a... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Working Holiday

Just back for a works tip to Spain, 11 days in a place i wont name as I dont want to give the game away, but I had a great time.

Last time I was there was a lads holiday 9 years ago, this time I ended up with a house to myself because the guy who was supposed to cover the job was planning on bringing his wife and k** so the house was booked, when he dropped out I said I would do it.

Ended up in a nice house with a little pool, was not too busy around there so no neighbors to complain. Good stuff.

Like I said I was there on a lds holiday years ago and had a bit of cunt (english & scott... Continue»
Posted by happy_wanking 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Road Trip

We had just left Savannah, Georgia, and were heading back north to Ft. Bragg, N.C. We were in my 68 Convertible Corvette, and Anya was always a horny b---h, when I started to play with her pussy, and she reached over and pulled my shorts down to my feet, and started to suck me. I was passing a panel van, when I looked over and saw this young driver looking at us and grinning, and giving me the thumbs up. I pulled her mini-skirt up around her waist, exposing her beautiful ass in a thong. Next thing I knew there were 2 more heads looking out the same window, with sh-t eating grins on their faces... Continue»
Posted by vince68 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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joke... about a qay parrot


A guy decides that maybe he'd like to have a pet and goes to a pet shop.

After looking around he spots a parrot sitting on a little perch; it doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says out loud, "Geez, I wonder what happened to this parrot?"

"I was born this way," says the parrot. "I'm a defective parrot."

"Ha, ha," the guy laughs. "It sounded like this parrot actually understood what I said and answered me."

"I understand every word," says the parrot. "I am a highly intelligent and thoroughly educated bird."

"Yeah?" the guy asks. "Then answer this: how do you hang onto ... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Shower Her With Something

Recently I made an unexpected big splash in our new neighborhood. We just moved to a new home the end of this past week. The home was a former model home and it was the largest of the three model homes in a model center that was sold off and the previous office. So, naturally the home has all the bells and whistles. Well, that is except one thing... they disarmed the alarm system when we closed on the house. I noticed this when we were opening and closing the door constantly moving furniture in the front door. I wasn’t hearing the high pitched “beep” I used to hear when we first viewed the hou... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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"A Day In A Life"

Bill had left for work an hour earlier. His last action before shutting the door was a perfunctory kiss on her cheek as he hurried out the door, his mind already occupied on the day's events. Again, he had missed the significance of her squeeze on his upper arm; again he missed entirely, the questioning look she gave his retreating back.

"Jay; get up, you're going to be late." Jean shouted at the top of her voice over the edge of the banister. Jamie was a typical angst ridden teenage young man, lazy and disinclined to venture out of bed before the last minute, or he had ... Continue»
Posted by fotoplace 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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My second one.. This was with my social..mam

I already shared with u guys my expirience with my science..mam and this s with my social mam.. I liked her..very much...
She s in her 40s .married but din have a c***d :( :)... but truth s that she s dam sexy...i always daydream at her..and result is fail in my exams.. So i get a chance to attend her remedials..around 10 students accompany me in her..class.. Oh i forget to say her character ,she s very strict ..she use to debate for all the topic.. So i know if i could get her in a sexy argument then i can win her.. .. I was waitin for a rite day..i said all my friends that lets bunk the re... Continue»
Posted by Michaelzoron 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Some might think...

Guys always say that it's easy for a woman to get some dick. Maybe that's true but then, what kind of dick is she gonna get ? Tonight, alone, k**s gone to their dad's, making some calls to some guys, but no one is answering their cell. Call up my Jamaican friend, n/a, call up my African friend, n/a, call up my American friend who's in S.A. and he says he'll call me back, but then, no news.

Oh ! almost forgot, I called up two different Haitian guys, but N/A !! lol

So, I figure, I'm gonna smoke some weed, watch a porn and play with myself but realize, after I start watching this vid that ... Continue»
Posted by BCBYATCH 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Russian Shemales 3: The Revenge

I am asking the translator what that means: The Revenge. There is no revenge in my story! And she says it is a kind of joke. Like the Electric Boogaloo. I do not understand why that is funny, but she is telling me to trust her, and continue with my story.

When we grew awake in the morning, Svetlana wanted more sexy sexy time, but I said to not. Because Mr. Aronoff would be there soon to pick us up for the bus ride back to home. Svetlana, who looked more like Serge in the morning, said quietly, he did not want to go back home. I pushed him into the shower to wash off the cosmetics fro... Continue»
Posted by TransContinental 10 months ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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Being nude short story

I thought I share this story of being nude in not your normal place, anyone a nudist? This is just a little story about a kinky fetishism I came up with about me it maybe a little interesting to you but I just wonder if other people have done anything like this I have been finding out how fun it is to be nude in a strange place to be nude at all. . I have always enjoyed being nude but not in proper places like nudist beaches or camps of any kind so I can't call myself a nudist. Very few times have I been nude with other's in a semi-nonsexual way it's, mostly all been sexual with partners or f... Continue»
Posted by lov2dancecpl 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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How To Behave After Sex

Step 1: Advice for him

You may feel that you have expressed yourself quite enough, perhaps you have expressed yourself a number of times, and feel spent. But it's essential you stay awake for long enough to make her feel loved. You may have to fight the urge to sl**p, but remember now it's time for her to unload all over you.

Speed up the process by making encouraging noises and agreeing to everything she says. The Past Master of this was Marlon Brando, who put his incredible success with women down to the pose of propping himself up on his elbow, which made him look interested in whatev... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Smart Boy ...



Old man sitting on his front porch in Louisiana watching the sunrise
sees the neighbor's k** walk by carrying something big under his arm.
He yells out, "Hey boy, whatcha got there?"
The boy yells back, "Roll of chicken wire."
The old man says, "What you gonna do with that?"
The boy says, "Catch some chickens."
The old man yells, "You damn fool, you can't catch chickens with
chicken wire!"
The boy just laughs and keeps walking.
That evening at sunset the boy comes walking by and to the old man's
surprise, he is dragging behind him the chicken wire with about 30
chicke... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Close call.

So the other day me and my girlfriend were home and her mom and b*****r stopped by the house real quick to bring us something for us. Well, when the 3 of them were in the living room I went to me and my girlfriends bedroom to get my phone, let's say I didn't get close to the phone. I was in the mood to fuck and cum on some heels, which I wished I would have had the camera. So while they're still in the living room I dig through our closet and get out the victim: A beautiful 4 inch, Nine West, black leather round toe heel(Yeah I gave the brand and type of heel, gotta make a story great with det... Continue»
Posted by shoeluvr 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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ibiza night

It was 2002,I took a holiday to Ibiza with a girl I had been seeing for about a month,kind of a fuck buddy thing going on,well,to me it was. We booked the holiday for 10 days so there was plenty of time to fit a lot in,but mainly we were there for the clubs,the pills and the thrills,anyone that's been to ibiza will know what i'm talking about.Back home we were serious into clubbing too,that was our lifestyle cos we were young and enjoying ourselves.

Anyway one night we were out,I think it was at ''Space'',a well known club in ibiza, when we bumped into a group of girls from back home.I didn... Continue»
Posted by soupinapothot 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Home coming

Zak skillfully maneuvered the big Lincoln through a maze of traffic and on to the off ramp of the expressway! As he slid into local traffic he adjusted the radio for some easy listening and thought to himself, "Almost home, and boy am I tired and hungry, and what a day, non stop from eight until six, I hope Katie has something good ready for supper!!!" He thought about Katie and how lucky he had been to meet someone so beautiful and smart at the same time, and how after three years of marriage just the mere sight of her naked body nearly drove him insane with lust!!! Finally he turned onto Car... Continue»
Posted by snake_500011 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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The Truth About Swinging....

So...you want to try swinging? You fantasize about what it will be like.You want to see your wife with another man?Would you both like to swing with another couple? Or do you want the "Holy Grail" of swinging, the hot 3 way with your wife and her hot friend from the office??? First question,One)Have you gotten your wife to AGREE to do this,and is she willing to do it,and does she want to "swing???" 98% of the time, its the MAN who brings up swinging, NOT the woman in the relationship.Now----If you've gotten your wife onboard with swinging,and you havebnt had to beg or "talk her into it" ( that... Continue»
Posted by heretic1 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Grinding my teeth to a Sex technique

When I was a c***d I was told more than one time to stop grinding my teeth. One day,

while I lay in bed as a boy, grinding my teeth thoughtlessly! I loved the way it made my teeth just vibrate, and the shaking

that went through my gums, but then that scrilling voice came, from my parents room," Stop Grinding your god-dam- teeth, or

pitch a tent in the yard, and sl**p in it, I am trying to sl**p!" I had been yelled at for the last time over this kind creepy

hobby of mine! So, I started re channeling the energy to nibbling the end of my... Continue»
Posted by lotsoflots 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Hardcore  |  
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Xmas Pussy Party

Attended a friends Xmas party and boy did it turn into strip poker. Party lasted until 4am. 8 females and 10 guys. Everybody got fucked, pussy ate and dicks sucked. I mean dicks were getting sucked left and right. I saw one girl with dick up her assz that dick was huge. It was good clean fun. I got my pussy ate and ass hole licked. Then some much needed dick from my date. He was so excited. He had never been to such a party were one minute you was dancing and partying then next getting some ass. I took him in the a room with another female had her suck his dick some more. Then he stuck it in m... Continue»
Posted by Phatpussy714 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Changing Room - Strange Relationship Version X

Caitlin’s log: Sunday, 10 a.m. I’m lying in bed with a terrible, nagging ache. You’d be forgiven for thinking I’d gone ten rounds with a Cabernet Sauvignon, but you’d be wrong. The ache was spiritual rather than physical, the apocalyptic realisation that for the third night running I’d lain awake for hours before falling asl**p, contemplating all manner of things related to re-igniting my sex life. See? That’s what I keep doing, dressing the issue up in euphemisms – “re-igniting my sex life”, “putting the excitement back into my... Continue»
Posted by ChrisTracy 5 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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