Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 66
“On your knees, you d***k bitch,” the cop said. Kelly immediately obeyed. She would never cheat on her husband, but if letting this brute **** her meant she wouldn’t go to jail then it was worth it. He just stood there while she reached up and unzipped his trousers. Kelly tried not to think about what she was doing as she pulled his cock free and slipped it into her mouth.
The officer’s penis was thicker than her husband’s. It tasted of sweat and grime, but Kelly wasn’t in a position to complain. She slobbered over it and began to pump it with her hand as she bobbed her mouth on it. As she... Continue»
Trevor found himself lying half naked in a bush, his shirt was off and his pants were around his ankles.
"How did I get here!" he asked himself.
He looked around at his surroundings and as he picked up his clothes which were strewn across the yard his memory came flooding back.
Several hours earlier...
Trevor had made a huge mess of things. His Spring Break visit was supposed to be a time to reconnect with his f****y but instead he brought a boozed up Bar Fly home for a romp in his Superman sheets.
After a weekend of apologising he had finally set things right with his mother ... Continue»
Your all alone and sacred in the woods. It's been days since you got separated from your group. Your hungry, scared and and being followed by 3 walkers. As you try to run you trip over a fallen tree, you look up and a walker is almost on top of you. You close your eyes and wait for the bite the will turn you into on of them. Just as you have given up hope a gunshot rings out in the quiet forest and the walkers head explodes covering you in zombie filth. You turn to see who save you and there she is. One of the hottest girls you have ever seen. Two more shots ring out and the other walkers drop... Continue»
All at once, Maria's limp lady stick transformed itself from lifeless shell into
The Incredable s/he Hulk. I had to keep opening my mouth to keep it all in.
Precum started to pour down my lips and chin onto to my bra. That precum was rapidly replaced by genuine girlie man paste.
I would have been laughing but it was like being
water boarded with seamen. I was drowning in hir cum. Holeee SHIT!
I swear I should have been a sex ther****t. It would be my mission to make
sure before some transgen... Continue»
It''s story time. My first time story so take it easy on me. The year was 2005. I had been separated from my wife forever, and we were pretty much done anyways. I always joke and say I was married on a Monday and in the club by Friday lol. Anyways my best friend decided I needed to go with him to his home one weekend. I figured why not. He had a girlfriend who had a friend who wanted to meet up. I was like cool, let's go. We get to my friends moms house(who happened to be out of town) that Friday nite. Me and my friend start drinking and his girl calls and says they are on they're way. 30 mins... Continue»
Attending a seminar in Chicago was not Curt Whalen’s idea of fun, particularly in the winter but his boss insisted. It was only a two day event on the last evening he decided to take in a little bit of local culture and he wandered around a few streets basically people watching.
He was thinking of heading back to his hotel when the flashing sign from a small bar caught his eye. Wandering in it seemed friendly enough, he ordered a drink and then noticed a very beautiful girl sitting a few empty stools away from him.
She was really quite gorgeous, she had a tantalizing pair of legs wound a... Continue»
My duty is to look after her husband while she is out most of time shopping or with her friends. I often give sedatives to Mr Sharma so that he can have a peaceful sl**p. I once saw a collection of porn movies in their closet and began to watch them when the wife was away and husband was sl**ping. I would put the volume low and watch porn and then put the movie back. I would sit on the sofa and rub my pussy and cum by fingering myself. Porn collection was very hot. I would dress more casually in skirts and loose tops as I became more comfortable with the couple and they loved me. I am avera... Continue»
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like roleplay.
You: Its 3pm, you get to your desk and on your computer you get an anonymous message: “You look great in that skirt today!”
Stranger: I'm kinda startled, but, after a second, answer anyway. "Thanks, I guess... Who is this?"
You: I chuckle and respond: "Well that would spoil the fun, if i told you, wouldn't it?"
Stranger: "How do you even know I'm wearing a skirt? I don't have a webcam..." I start feeling a little uncomfortable.
You: "You passed right by me today" (you work in a big office with lots of desks)
Well my first blog entry was about my first swinger party , which went quite well , but I also learn that you not really a gamer until you go to an actually swingers club . Swinger parties are usually thrown by a home owner who invites their friends and other like minded people within their network, but swinger clubs is like going to a night club , but with one catch you can most likely fuck someone inside the club with little or no game , because everyone there is also looking for a sexual encounter. Most of the work is already done, all you need is walk around the room and see you like and s... Continue»
Why is it so many people want to be my friend? I mean seriously. You don't have to be friends with somebody in order to be friends. Some of my best friends aren't my friends, but we're really, REALLY GOOD friends. Then on the other hand, some of my friends aren't friends at all. We're just friends, is all. It's a shame, but that the way it is sometimes.
So why do you want to be my friend? We don't know each other. Out of the clear blue you swoop down and say, "HEY! You want to be friends?" --I don't know you! For all I know, you could be an axe murderer! Or worse, you co... Continue»
I had just broke up with my ex and met a girl in a town 30 mins away and my buddy was interested in her friend so it was good for both of us to drive there, we got there and the girls looked great and being kinda hick my buddy and i looks well hick, we went to a movie and then got a bit to eat (it was summer and nice out) we then desided that we could both push i luck if we go outta town were there was a park so we went there and me and the girl i hard my eye on went to the play ground and my buddy and his girl were walking around me and the girl started making out and bein inosent she was a l... Continue»
1. Cut your finger nails!
This is such a simple little thing, but it goes a long way. You will be hard pressed to find any area on her body more sensitive than her vagina (inside and out), and the LAST thing you want to do is completely ruin the mood with a scratch. How do you know if your nails are cut short enough? Touch your gums with the tips of your fingers, how do they feel? If you're not sure, cut them. (If you're having daily sex with your partner, you might be cutting your fingernails as often as every 2-3 days.) But believe me, it's THAT important.
2. Listen and pay attention (in b... Continue»
This piece of writing is an extract from my novel "Toggenburg" It's not a sex story as such but I post it here for a dear friend who I learned to my surprise had never flown on an aeroplane! Since this chapter was about a character's first flight on an aircraft i decided to post this for a little fun and to whet the appetite of my beloved shewolf for her first journey into the realms above.
The following day dawned bright and sunny although there were still clouds about clinging to the sides of the mountains. Sarah was up early; jumping excitedly out of the bed she shared with Daniela at ... Continue»
You receive an email. 'I will drive the van, meet me under the lampost down at **** stree, 10:45pm'.. where your hottest outfit, and sexiest underwear
(next day) . Drivings tough, the fog thick everywhere, from the van I see what appears to be a high end e****t in a red overcoat, the light from the lampost shines down upon her. Her hair is glistening. locks flowing, lips so juicy, Her nipples appear to be erect under the lights gaze.I pull over ... 'get in the back'.
The van door closes and remains the same for 30 mins. It stops, arriving at what appears to be a lush hotel. 'Ladies first',... Continue»
by Peter Leo.
approaching the door of our suite, with key in hand, i think with a frown how late business took me and that you’ll be fast asl**p. so knowing my fate, with the stealth of a cat burglar, i quietly slip the key into the lock of the knob. pushing the door open i enter soundlessly. wanting, but not wanting to wake you. i listen in hopes that you aren’t sl**p. but as i make my way into the darkened room, i see your cloths strewn over a chair near the bed. making out your soft steady breathing, that of someone lost in dreamland. “damn”, i mumble.
And so began my screening interview and my first adventure into the world of adult films. Once I got past all the legal bullshit the questions were kind of fun to answer.
Had I ever had gay sex before?
"Everyone in the room seemed gay and happy about what I was doing to them at the time."
There was a guest speaker for the monthly meeting of the Pleasant Town Trans-gender League. This guy was so full of shit it wasn't funny. He supposedly represented someone wanting to do a documentary... Continue»
Professor David Perrett, of the University of St Andrews, said that the characteristics of our parents are imprinted in our minds as c***dren, so that we remember and recognise our parents from a very early age.
This is a result of observing our families at close quarters and is seen in other mammals, reports the Daily Mail.
But it seems these "remembered" characteristics do go on to influence who we find attractive in later life.
The researchers conducted a large-scale survey, asking 300 men and 400 women (all of whom were in a relationship and who had been brought up by two paren... Continue»
Once there was a traveling sales man named John, selling his wares on the back roads of Iowa. One evening, he was lost, driving down a deserted country road. When he hit a pothole in the night, it threw him across the ditch and into a tree. John got out of the car, he wasn't hurt but the car wasn't going anywhere. He looked up and down the road. No one would be traveling these roads this late at night he thought. So he picked a direction and started walking.
As John walked in the dark, he could hear all the sounds of the night. "What was that?... "He startled, "Oh just an owl." Then a coyo... Continue»
Author's Note: Thanks for the patience. This chapter will contain some i****t elements, though it won't directly involve the son and mother just yet. If you're not comfortable with the idea of i****t, you could either skip some of the paragraphs in this chapter or just go on to read Ch. 03.
For Ch.03, I plan to write the mother's perspective which will briefly cover what happened in these two chapters, as well as other events that happened after - without the i****t.
Ch. 04 will be either the son or the mother WITH i****t. I haven't yet decided. It may depend on what the readers want or ... Continue»
In addition to its ability to cheer you up in times of need, porn has some useful lessons to impart to its viewers. On the other hand, some of these are hideous faux pas that every man should avoid like the plague -- or gonorrhea, for that matter. Then there are the great lessons porn has to offer us all.
Pornography is generally a healthy staple of any man’s life, but beware: Not all porn is helpful to your sex life. Watching porn with your girlfriend can be a great way to learn about each other and have a laugh. Although you'll probably learn most lessons on your own, if you're lucky, yo... Continue»