Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 65

Jane and the Belly Dancer

Jane and the Belly Dancer

We resumed fucking and for the first time in my life I began to feel sick to my
stomach while having sex. It was time to resume my self coaching.

"This is how I'm gonna someday make THE BIG BUCKS! Just a few more minutes.
Oh shit look at those tits bounce! The way she's moving her legs. OMG OMG OMG!

***********************************************************************

I gazed into the full length mirror inside the dressing room and admired
my new makeover. There was fresh make up on my face which for the first
time ever, included f... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
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More Than Just A Word

Beth smirked at her friend across the room and quickly sipped from her mid afternoon glass of Chablis in an attempt to stop herself from giggling. Jenna, her friend since school, wasn't fairing quite so well in stifling her own fit of girlish giggles. As her shoulders began to silently shake, Beth knew it was only a matter of time before her friend would let out her customary bizarre high pitched whine, which always preceded the inevitable complete break down into hysterics for both women.

Beth had been here many times before. Like the time, many years ago at a party, where Beth awoke to th... Continue»
Posted by stalfonzo 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Booty Inspector of the Old West (part 1)

[Tune in tomorrow evening for Part 2 of THE BOOTY INSPECTOR]


Intro:
The man walked into the room with a shotgun raised over his head and shouted "Now, ah'm only goanna repeat myself one Mo' time! I want all you men ta' lay down yous'n weapons and all you Womanfolk to drop down yours'n panties and pull on up dem skirts, because I here am the Booty Inpsector and I've come to inspect yours'n booties!"

And so the rise of Fame and Legend was given to the Old West's first and only "Booty Inspector" who hijacked trains and banks only to inspect womenfolk’s' Booties, at gunpoin... Continue»
Posted by markfayer 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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First Fuck Flop (Non-fiction)

Every word of the following first-hand account is true, as best I can remember:

It was the summer of '91, and I had recently moved to Lancaster, CA from Northern California. I was 16 years old, and horny as hell pretty much all the time. If you've read my other true story about my first orgasm, then you know that this story begins about two years after that.

I ran with some "interesting" people when I was younger...pretty much anyone I might meet at a party, at a dealer's house, perhaps at school when I wasn't ditching, etc...and even though I wasn't a bad looking guy, and ... Continue»
Posted by femalesonly 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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sunny's wife's away

Sunny Brown’s wife Valerie, a hospital senior dietician, had gone to Sydney for an advanced hospital nutrition and food services management course for a month and Sunny's missing her and missing connecting with her vagina. Equally distressing he was missing her superior cooking compared to his best endeavours and generally most restaurant meals he’d had didn’t measure up either.

But he survived without complaint and cooked some of his dinners, mainly sticking with chicken fried rice or mince on toast or a roast. Two bright spots were invitations on week one and week two from two friends, we... Continue»
Posted by sunnybrown 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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hot s****r

i will tell u my story! Sex with friends s****r
when i was 13 my friend's s****r is 8 year elder to me and him and her boobs is round and sexy, her armpits is very smelly and hairy. I often go his house to meet him but side-by-side I want to see his s****r. One day I had gone to his house and his s*s is sl**ping in pajama and her pajama (nightwear) is torn from her panty side and her panty is clearly visible. but i do nothing. After one week i go to his house nd that time he is not in house only his elder s****r is in house lonely in cut sleeves Kurti(top)nd in pajama(bottom wear) she say
... Continue»
Posted by ishaan217 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Rachael - The Babysitter

"Mais maman!" Je plaidé. "Je ne ai pas besoin d'une baby-sitter! Je ne peux pas simplement rester moi-même cette fois? »Mais elle ne bougeait pas. Pour l'amour de Pete, je avais quatorze ans. Tout simplement parce que mes parents ont dû sortir de la ville pour le week-end, pourquoi ai-je avoir quelqu'un rester avec moi comme si je étais un petit enfant!

«Regardez Jeff, je ai entendu tout ce que je vais vous entendre. Je reçois la fille de Mme Walker, Rachel de rester avec vous, et ce est tout ce qu'il ya à faire. »Puis sa voix se adoucit un peu. "Ecoute chérie, ce ne est pas que nous ne vou... Continue»
Posted by kristak 6 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  
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The Alleyway

This particular night came about when a good (a newly discovered lesbian) friend of mine invited me to join her to a "ladies night" at a local gay club. Being an overwhelmingly heterosexual male, I jumped at the idea of attending. All the while thinking, "Maybe there will be some cracking hot chicks who'd want to take turns. etc." My mind ran wild in the day leading up the party. I couldnt contain my excitement, frequently letting my friend know what I was going to do to the "babes" in the club.

The night arrived. I'd groomed myself, gave myself a little pep-talk in the mirror, put on the f... Continue»
Posted by sirpsychosexy2011 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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hot white woman gets five black cocks!!!!!

This is the third story on Lynette, the hot white woman from the gym. Guess you can say this is a trilogy. ha ha (first was Giving a Hot White Woman Her First Black Cock" and second was "Motel Rendevous."

This past weekend was real interesting, really interesting. Friday I met a damn hot lady something might be, yea, just might be about to happen there. Saturday night I sat in some real good seats at the Braves game as they beat the Giants and made a new friend for sure. Somebody familiar might end up on my football team.
Sunday, yea baby! Sunday!!!! I got my boys together for Lynette’s al... Continue»
Posted by adam2010 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Fight In Mall Gets Melissa Horny

This is a reprint of my first story so please don't get offended by any ethnic slurs as this a true story and is how it happened.

It all started on a rainy Saturday afternoon in July of 2005.
My girlfriend Melissa and I had plans to go on a picnic instead the rain that was predicted for late this evening came early.So Melissa suggested we go to the mall and do some shopping.I was not happy but I needed a few things for my computer.
when we got there it was packed I guess we were not the only ones that changed their plans at the last minute,before I go any further let me describe Meliss... Continue»
Posted by bigrob40 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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what happend

I think I better start from the beginning?

my wife & I have been married for over 30 years, we had good times well as bad times, for me I would say been more good time then bad times over the years.

once a month we do a meal in the house.
my wife would say meal tonight & fun, so we go into town pick up what we need then come home have sl**p for an hour or two?

about 4:30 I start the meal then about 5:30 wife go up stairs ask me to give her shave, while she getting ready for me to shave her I would run the bath.
after I shaved her all over how she looks like little girl bold?
I wou... Continue»
Posted by massoneup 10 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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The Tale Of Humpy

Humpy McSaddle greeted the following day with a sly, clownish smile on his face, and it never left. Not that day, nor in the weeks that followed. She came to him most every day now, never at the same time. If she didn't appear for several days, McSaddle would stomp around the slaughterhouse, out of his mind with the clap, tearing at his hair plugs, bending at the waist to contain the nuclear urgency of his ever-ravenous hump tentacle.

He never knew when she might appear-morning, afternoon, evening. He might be having Taco Bell, and he would feel her near. Or walk by himself to inspect ... Continue»
Posted by Insatiable111 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Giving advice

Part of my job is giving advice to groups of around 40 people; the reason for the small numbers is in my field of work and a lot of individuals need to ask many questions and you could be their all night.
Last Monday I was in Harrogate doing a talk. In the front row, smack in the middle were this good looking couple in their 40s, he had a very expensive suit on and she had this wonderful short dress showing quite a lot of leg extenuating her figure with a nice pair of black and red high heels. As I was talking the woman kept crossing her legs one way then the other and this caused her dress t... Continue»
Posted by joncristo 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Enjoying during studying in college

That happened to me when I studied at the University. I didn’t live with my parents because in this city we didn’t have a house or some relatives or even friends. I was late to get my name on the list to the college hostel, so I had to rent accommodation just a few blocks from the campus. There were 2 of us, 2 girls who rented one apartment, because it was a bit cheaper for us both to share accommodation fees.
I walked in to the apartment I shared with another girl named Lucy. It was late Friday night. I had been in the library, preparing for my exams on the next Monday. The living room was i... Continue»
Posted by urpussysucker 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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LITTLE JOHNNY......

A few months after his parents were divorced, little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"
Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning:

"Ohh, I need a bike! Ahh, I need a bike!"

... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Revenge is sweet

A f****y sitting around the dinner table and the son asks if he can ask a question.
The father responds.
Of course,the only question!
The young man asks his dad:
Dad,how many different kinds of breasts are there?
Father,surprised,answers
Well,son,there are three kinds of breasts.
The 20-year-old woman has breasts are like melons, round & firm.
Around 30-40 years of age are like pears still nice but hanging a bit.
After fifty,they are like onions.
Onions?
Yes, when you see them and they make you cry.
This outlay was both mother and daughter to see red,so the daughter sa... Continue»
Posted by betty6love6 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Italian Job 11

The Italian Job 11
I awoke again about 07.30, it took a few seconds to get my bearings then there was a stirring in my groin and I realised I was spooned up with her again, she turned as she woke bringing her face very close to mine in the bed, I straightened my legs down the bed and she brought her hips into me, passing a leg onto the top of mine, she had her eyes open and she was watching me “are you ok this morning?” she asked “I feel terrific” I replied “ any second thoughts or regrets?” she continued “why should there be?” I countered “last night you had sex with a woman who could be you... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Dating leads to Fun with neighbour

Hello Guys and Girls I’m Naren 23 years old from Chennai. I am a student. Well I don't like to praise my own personality by my own words but my friends opinion about my personality is that Dude, you can impress any female of this world whether married or unmarried, whether sound character or unsound by your personality with in no time.
I am here to narrate the best encounter of my life. I am eagerly waiting for the response and suggestions of my story readers and readers post your feedback or If you need any help you can mail me on chennainareshk@gmail.com
It was summer vacation. I was alone... Continue»
Posted by matterboy 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The teacher and the student - Part 3 (A loving tri

I had an appointment with Nanci scheduled for late Tuesday afternoon.
She was stressed-out and there was no reason to prolong her agony over her grades, and I was going to let her off the hook.
Even knowing that my coed selection had already been made for the year and she was no longer a possibility, Nanci still made me silently gasp as she walked through the door, and I could see the truly radiant beauty that she was. Even with her eyes downcast and a frown on her face, she was gorgeous.

After she was seated, I explained that I had been watching her progress in class and on the essays... Continue»
Posted by elausente 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Adventures at the Orgy Motel. Part 1

Roots Motel Ch 1
By: Friskee_cpl (friskee_cpl@yahoo.com.au)

It takes hours to write these stories but only seconds to vote and send a message. Thanks to all of those wonderful people who send messages. It does make a difference. Please enjoy.

You help fuck a friend's wife and cum all in her cunt and you end up buying their motel. As Ned Kelly said "Such is Life".

Hello I am Marcus Franklin. I own a small motel in the Riverina and I spend a fair amount of my time in the bedroom. Well bedrooms to be precise. I have just bought a 20 room motel that I will be running with my wife Sharon... Continue»
Posted by friskee_cpl 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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