Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 65

My Porn Film Fantasy - Anyone know of one like thi

My fantasy video would be one where a white couple were having an argument because the lady just found out her husband had been having an affair, the shouting prompts neighbours in the motel to call the police. Three big black cops turn up and have to restrain the husband and put him in the back of a police car...they tell him if they can get her to calm down they wont put him in jail, and they all take turns to go in and try to convince her to forgive him for cheating on her, satisfied that the lady is recompensed they reunite the couple , have them kiss and make up and tell each other how mu... Continue»
Posted by greyhaired 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The stripper - a humiliation story

I was nervous, as you would imagine, on my first night as a male stripper. Most men would have a knot in their stomach before taking their clothes off in front of a baying crowd of middle aged, cock starved chav women. I, however, had another worry.

As it happened, I didn't want to be a stripper, far from it, but my rent was due and I had spent all of my money on a new inflatable sex doll. This might sound a little frivolous, but her pussy was supposedly modelled on Spring Thomas. Unfortunately that meant my penis didn't touch the sides of Spring's plastic cunt, and I had to jerk off as usu... Continue»
Posted by mr_massive 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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one that got away (funny story)

a few years ago i was a sophmore in college and i was kind of struggling to get used to the whole college life and stuff. I havnt had any long term relationships, as a matter of fact ive never had one more than a couple of weeks. that semester i said to myself "im gonna change this and get something going"; around that time i noticed a girl, she was my swimming proffesor and was only a year older than me.

this girl was probably the most beautiful girl i have ever seen ( in all honesty she really is) she had shoulder length black hair that had a very unique glossy texture. s... Continue»
Posted by vrgnguy4fun 6 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Question for the men?

I have been talking with men, and, most men say 'They like to fuck a smelling foul pussy!' because, it give them pleasure during sex, and, like the smell of sex in the room, more like a workout.

My quesion is, What do you prefer, a smelling foul pussy? or, a pussy don't have no scent at all?


PS. If wondering about my pussy, my pussy don't have no scent.... Continue»
Posted by hotblackpussy42 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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MY FAV JOKES

Patient to doctor: The problem is that obesity runs in our f****y. Doctor to patient: No.............the problem's that no one runs in your f****y.

I was walking home late one night and saw a woman in the shadows.
"Ten pounds . ." she whispers.
I'd never been with a prostiture before, so i decided, it’s only a tenner,why not, So we hide in the bushes.
Were going at it for a minute or so when all of a sudden a light flashes on us. It’s a policeman.,"Ello ello ello,What’s going on here, " asks the officer.
"I’m making love to my wife!, " i answered indignantly.
"Oh, I’m sorry, " say... Continue»
Posted by icumonu 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Hot Experience With Newly Married Bhabhi


my name is Aman, i am 23 years old and i live in Gurgaon, Delhi. I am a good looking guy, 6 ft. tall. This is my first story so sorry for the mistakes. Getting to the story now

It was a hot afternoon in Delhi and i was at my bhabhi’s place as she had invited me for lunch. She was recently married and she had all the curves a woman could have. She was wearing an orange color kurti and black skinny fit leggings. She was looking very sexy and like a newly married woman her face was glowing. She had a fair complexion and her siz
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Dumb? but I am not blond

During my freshmen year in High School I was new to this country. I didn't much about it. My f****y had just moved from Mexico to California and we had no clue how different things worked here, and how similiar were other things. When I was living in Mexico we had no money, but every month my mom managed to pay the rent. A man would come in every first of the month and ask for the money. My mom would ask me to go to my room. Then she would walk to the guy to her room and after two hours he would leave the house. So happy that he would forget to ask for the money. Back then I had no idea what r... Continue»
Posted by latintetas 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Karma is a Bitch

Over a span of a couple of years, Dave had a few more flings and he came to the realization that, for the most part, pussy is all the same. It really comes down to one’s presentation and enthusiasm. His wife, Cindi, was a good woman. With a weight loss plan and some weekly exercise, she got thin, fit and feeling pretty good about herself. She really became the most beautiful mother of 3 you could ever have laid eyes on. Dave was feeling guilty for some of the things he had done and he hoped to live a better life. He got the f****y going to a small church in town. That church had an ... Continue»
Posted by morelead 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Top Clues that your Woman Is Cheating On You

Short of walking in on your wife or girlfriend doing unspeakable things with another dude, there's no foolproof way to know if she's cheating on you. But there are clues — thing is, you probably don't notice any of them.

But we know two guys who do — in fact, it's their job. Between them, Christopher Paoletti, president of Infidelity Investigations LLC, and Tony DeLorenzo, co-author of The 28 Tell-Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse, they have about 45 years of experience hunting down cheaters. So we asked them to tell us what sort of behavior is a tip of that a woman might be cheating on you.
... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Does Your Girl Clean Your Cock?

Standing in the doorway to my apartment with Becs, I think back to meeting her for the first time. I'd been playing pool with Brian, my at-the-time and current roommate, in our dorm's community room, which looked like a huge living room furnished with the same aqua blue tables and chairs we had in our rooms, a flat screen TV, couches everywhere, and a ratty old pool table. I'd gotten a game in pretty much every day that year, our freshman year, and was getting to be okay. Becs, or Rebecca as she called herself then, came by with some girl she was rushing with, I forget her name, and started ta... Continue»
Posted by PureCoffee 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Dogging Mistress from out of space !

I'd never held with all that conspiracy theory; sure I'd watched star trek, sure I could do the Vulcan sign, and if Captain kirk pyjamas make me a geek, then I'm a geek. But I'd never really believed it was true; all the flying saucer and alien a*****ion brigade, screwballs and fruitcakes..... or that's what I thought, but not now, not after what happened last night, not anymore, now I'm a believer b*****rs and s****rs. Because last night my girlfriend fucked and an alien, and I think I may have sucked its cock.

Picture the scene if you will; it's an overcast muggy, sweaty night at our loca... Continue»
Posted by FannyandNobby 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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forbidden

I came home from school today to find the house empty, where was mum, I went to the back door and saw her in the garden. sunbathing, I stepped out towards her and noticed she was naked so I stopped. As I gazed at her I saw she was lying on her back on the lawn with her legs spread wide and held in the air, her hand reached between her legs and was moving up and down. Then I heard her talking to herself. " Fuck me, Fuck me, fuck me johnny. thats it fuck my ass, fuck your mummy." I stepped forward and spoke, "mummy" "yes Johnny" your a bit noisy today remember the n... Continue»
Posted by celcus 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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What the Hell

Well Came home from work early the other day and caught my bitch cheating for the second time.. And this time with her Uncle.. No shit well he was married to her aunt at one time no bl**d there but still nasty as fuck if you ask me.. But thru it all I kept a level head cause we have a 1yr girl together...and Was not about to ruin me being in her life because her mother is a stupid whore.. My first thought was to snap and kill them to be honest.. But That would serve no purpose.. I instead did the right thing and was very polite and killed them with kindness.. They did me a favoe if tyou ask me... Continue»
Posted by steven6977 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Excited wet dream.

I went to see my male physiologist to talk about the wet dream I were having. Here, how I had explained the dream: 'I was playing a role as a sexy housewife to my husband, wearing nothing underneath my bathrobe. I’ve just finish taking a hot bubble bath, my pussy was still soaking and wet, and, my husband is lying on the bed watching TV with his dick stand out of his underpants. I took off my bathrobe, walk over to my husband, begin to suck on his hard rock dick, I suck his dick like a lollipop; I can feel his dickhead going toward my deep throat. Slurping, and licking on his dick nice and fas... Continue»
Posted by Darkpussy 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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atlantic city sex show

i was born in new jersey, grown up in new jersey and never ever ever left new jersey. why you ask. don't drive and no one drive me. trenton is where i am and will be always. at 67 old i want go to atlantic city. my landlord say's dudley, you want to go for ride to casinos and i want. so it happened. he drive and i so happy and tell him i got no money. he know because he get my disability check for rent. he say dudley, no worry, i help you but you have to pay back. i say i no want gamble, i want pussy. after long drive in middle i got go pp. we stop and i go pee. then i hungry and want burger a... Continue»
Posted by Dudley_Flem_Fartner 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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THE STRANGEST JIGSAW PUZZLE

THE STRANGEST JIGSAW PUZZLE
It was on the top shelf on an old bookcase, covered with dust and barely visible. Lisa decided she had to find out what it was. Of all the things in the old junk shop, it aroused her curiosity most. She had looked through old books, prints, and postcards for hours. Nothing had caught her interest. Now the old box, high and out of reach, intrigued her. She looked around for the old man who ran the store. But he had gone into the back room. She saw a stepladder across the room and brought it over to the bookcase. It shook on the uneven floorboards as she climbed to t... Continue»
Posted by JASON4VOORHEES2 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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YOU HAVE TO BE ADAPTABLE ..

Many years ago when I was about five or six years of age I experimented anally in the bath with a bit of soap; it felt good apart from the soap stinging a little bit.

When I was about ten years of age I got fucked for the first time by a friend of the same age. I don't know where he got the idea from but it felt very nice although there were minor complications.

In my teens a male friend and I used to have wanking races in his bedroom. We used to suck each other but not to orgasm so I never knowingly swallowed his cum.

Around about that time I lost my anal virginity in total to a Ga... Continue»
Posted by AussieJonno 4 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Supersex with co- worker

One Friday after work, we were all from the office and had a single beer. As people disappeared, only Suzanne and me back.

My name is Torben and late thirties and Susan are a couple of years younger. We are both married and have c***dren, but there has always been a little electricity between us.

It has never translated into anything, but as we got a few beers, I could see that Suzanne became more and more unrestrained.

At one point she comes little dancing over to me and lose completely random balance, so she has to sit on my lap. I put my arms around her waist and hold on tight so s... Continue»
Posted by Rumleskaft1984 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy

Put Your Muffin Where Your Mouth is, Mandy
Written by irish4skin
Starring
Mandy Muffin as herself
Josephine James as herself T-Girl Candy Surprise as herself
MILF Delilah as Linda Herrin T-Girl Carla Novaes as herself
Corina Curves as Dr. Carolyn Dick T-Girl Elisangel as herself
Donita Dunes as herself Sasha Grey as herself
T-Girl Adriana Rodriguez as Salina T-Girl Mariana Cordoba as Sama... Continue»
Posted by icemanrisen 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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More Confessions of the Locker Room


With my sky blue sports bag in hand, I travelled to my football team's training ground. I made sure to arrive just before half 8 in the morning, ready for our 9am departure time to take on our next opponents in a crucial league game. As I walked, I kept thinking about what had happened between me and Hannah in the showers yesterday evening. I was a little nervous about what we'll say when we see
eachother.

I walked through the small iron gates and headed into the lunchroom where most of my
teammates were sat about, talking and joking.

"Hey Sam." Hannah called, sitting on top of the... Continue»
Posted by LittleMissFart 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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