Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 64

Knock on the door

I hear a knock at the door and come to answer it, hoping that it's u and not someone else about to see me in a tight schoolgirl outfit. I open the door and breathe a sigh of relief as I see U standing there. Ur jaw drops as U take in what I’m wearing, the tight top perfectly showing off my ample tits as well as most of my lacey bra, while the bottom half could barely be said to be a skirt with it rising just above my ass, teasing of what's underneath. I smile and say hi as we move inside, u shut the door behind u but cant take ur eyes off my sexy ass. We've barely walked inside when u spin me ... Continue»
Posted by claireidare 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 713  |  
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Make a promise, keep a promise

A promise is a promise

The story I’m telling is absolutely true
This Story is translated, so please excuse bad english.

2010 July, 17
About 10am


I remember exactly what happened on that day. It was quite warm although it was in the morning .To be honest, it was a searing heat in my hometown. We who live in the Ruhr-area have Sunshine too though it is below the sea level. A fact even many Germans from afar don’t realize. Despite it was just 10am a fiery heat already has spread what made me wake up really early this Saturday. Normally I sl**p like a log on weekends but this a****... Continue»
Posted by Bea69 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 710  |  
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The Expanded Back Story Of Sarah, A Girl From The


In the 2 years I spent as a bartender there were only two girls, Sarah and Kelly, that I fucked just to fuck.
The other 13 I actually liked in some way or another, I mean I didn' want to marry them or anything, but they all had some charm.

But not Sarah. Sarah was hot alright, in fact I ranked her at the top 3 of the hottest girls I fucked while working at the bar. She had nice long dirty blond/light brown hair, a very respectable body, I'm not talking rail thin or anything, but the meat was in all the right places. mainly her tits, a nice 36C if I remember correctly and a fine ... Continue»
Posted by the_bartender 1 month ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  Views: 709  |  
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Party Girl

"Oh come on Phyllis, it'll be fun," Brenda pleaded, "you're always saying how you never get a chance to meet anyone and I can guarantee you that the place we are going will be loaded with a lot of guys!!!" Phyllis looked doubtfully at her room mate and replied, "I don't know, Freddy has some pretty weird friends, do you really think we should!?!" "Of course we should, silly," Brenda replied excitedly, "and what you consider weird, I consider "different"!!!" "Well," Phyllis replied, "if you really think so............." "Good, it's settled then," Brenda said happily, "we're gonna go!!!

... Continue»
Posted by rime923091 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 708  |  
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The Truth About Swinging....

So...you want to try swinging? You fantasize about what it will be like.You want to see your wife with another man?Would you both like to swing with another couple? Or do you want the "Holy Grail" of swinging, the hot 3 way with your wife and her hot friend from the office??? First question,One)Have you gotten your wife to AGREE to do this,and is she willing to do it,and does she want to "swing???" 98% of the time, its the MAN who brings up swinging, NOT the woman in the relationship.Now----If you've gotten your wife onboard with swinging,and you havebnt had to beg or "talk her into it" ( that... Continue»
Posted by heretic1 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 710  |  
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First Time

Back in, I believe 2009, I was confronted by an ex in the middle of a park.

She confessed herself, before we knew it we were making-out for a good half hour before she took me down to the beach and into a small wooded area. She laid there before we started in on each other, it was probably one of the hottest moments of my life.
15 Minutes later she started to ride me like her life depended on it, unfortunately so old man walked over and was about to take a piss. The moment was ruined in second.

It didn't end well, but still a first time is a first time.... Continue»
Posted by 7inchesofheaven 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 705  |  
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sex story patr I (sonnnyla) for me

You receive an email. 'I will drive the van, meet me under the lampost down at **** stree, 10:45pm'.. where your hottest outfit, and sexiest underwear
(next day) . Drivings tough, the fog thick everywhere, from the van I see what appears to be a high end e****t in a red overcoat, the light from the lampost shines down upon her. Her hair is glistening. locks flowing, lips so juicy, Her nipples appear to be erect under the lights gaze.I pull over ... 'get in the back'.
The van door closes and remains the same for 30 mins. It stops, arriving at what appears to be a lush hotel. 'Ladies first',... Continue»
Posted by JessicaBrown 8 months ago  |  Categories: Voyeur, Sex Humor, Fetish  |  Views: 705  |  
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WILL'S FANTASY PART 1

I come to be with you in USA.
You take me to your home and we talk as you get me settled in the guest room.
Wanting to take things slow till we both feel ready for more.
We grow closer as the days go by and I know what I want.
I go to the garage to help you fix the car ,wearing a dress and bringing a small hamper of snacks (short bread biscuits,strawberries ,whipped cream and chocolate sauce )for later ...
I stand there ,in the door way ,smiling as you tell me I am not dressed for garage work...
You hand me overalls...
I look into your eyes & smile at you then drop my gaze & gigg... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 704  |  
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What attracts women to older men?

Professor David Perrett, of the University of St Andrews, said that the characteristics of our parents are imprinted in our minds as c***dren, so that we remember and recognise our parents from a very early age.

This is a result of observing our families at close quarters and is seen in other mammals, reports the Daily Mail.

But it seems these "remembered" characteristics do go on to influence who we find attractive in later life.

The researchers conducted a large-scale survey, asking 300 men and 400 women (all of whom were in a relationship and who had been brought up by two paren... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 704  |  
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Going Fishin'

Introduction: A tale with a twist

Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect backwoods camping and fishing trip.

Two days before the group is to leave, Frank's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going. Frank's friends are very upset that he can't go but, what can they do...

Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Frank sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and fish cooking on the fire. "Damn man! How long you been here and how did you talk your wife into letting you go?"

"Well, I've been here since yesterday. The night bef... Continue»
Posted by PornApocalypse 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 704  |  
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Tranny Sex Therapy

All at once, Maria's limp lady stick transformed itself from lifeless shell into
The Incredable s/he Hulk. I had to keep opening my mouth to keep it all in.
Precum started to pour down my lips and chin onto to my bra. That precum was rapidly replaced by genuine girlie man paste.

I would have been laughing but it was like being
water boarded with seamen. I was drowning in hir cum. Holeee SHIT!

********************************************************************************

I swear I should have been a sex ther****t. It would be my mission to make
sure before some transgen... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 701  |  
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Playing with Amy Dumas (Lita)

Posted by eroll113 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 699  |  
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My True Thing!

My first Blowjob was with 45+ aged man and its was f***eful against my wish. That was first time I touched PENIS and after that incident was feeling so sinful, which made me to watch PORN in my free time and been to xHamster.

After being here got a desire to catch thick white man's penis, so was searching for safe man locally and got one Australian in FaceBook, who use to stay in India working as Network engineer. He dint knew that I was 18 and used to send lots of erected penis snaps to me, and its was really thick white one.

A day... Continue»
Posted by indianbee 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 699  |  
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Who is she #1

Here we go.
I met a girl long ago she was engaged to another man, i had an intimate moments with her on a school trip I was a senior, we didnt go to the same school.
She called told me she was pregnant and I basically told her it wasnt mines and good luck. She was dismissed. Call me a jerk but she was engaged ( why was she calling me) her privates wasnt even tight for her to claim she was pure.
Years passed I tried calling to check on her, she married and moved. Good for her.

NY holiday season its busy, the lights are bright, ppl are shopping, ppl are working, the smell of tar, roasted... Continue»
Posted by 6775young 2 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 701  |  
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Frustration Contact. (Short Story) Also seen on L

The queue, waiting for the first lift is large, but my eyes focus happily on the blonde hair of a woman ahead of me, rather than the floor indicator above each lift. I love women like her, slim, mature, maybe even over fifty, dressed in a suit, shiny hair in a bob style, elegant and feminine.

I am going into the same lift as her, just so that I may gaze discretely at her and enjoy her good looks. My head thrills at the possibility that she has a thin blouse and underneath, a Camisole top. Utterly divine!

The right hand lift arrives and a mass of people shuffle sideways to get it, but ... Continue»
Posted by matureworship 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 697  |  
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Mule Balls






An American couple on vacation with some friends in Mexico were
shopping at the market to bring back a few souvenirs to their f****y
and friends. Time passed, and the couple realized that neither of them
was wearing a watch. They noticed this little Mexican man taking a
siesta next to this mule, which had the largest set of mule nuts they
had ever seen.
Trying not to stare at the huge mule nuts, they asked the little
Mexican man, "Excuse us, but could you tell us what time it is?"
The little Mexican man reached his hand under the enormous set of mule
nuts and, li... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 696  |  
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Sex With Tuition Teacher’s Sexy Mom



[bMy name is kumar (name changed) and i was 16 years old i was studying diploma in B’lore. When i was failed in 5 subjects my mom send to tuition in my near home.my tuition teacher name is pooja and she is studying in engg final year and her mom name is sridevi with a big whitish boobs big ass white navel.let me describe the story

One day when my grand father died my f****y has gone to my village due to my exams i was in tuition teacher’s home. By that her husban... Continue»
Posted by bava12 9 months ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 700  |  
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What to do For an Encore

"Back in med evil days Gay sex was more in the open."

"Behold Hector, someone with their head and arms
caught in the stockade. Let us make haste
and part his ass cheeks forthwith!"

"You go ahead Orville I will go to the village and summon
the brethren so we can have a proper gang bang!"

*********************************************************************

The room was filled with cigarette smoke. But that wasn't a problem for two reasons. One we weren't at work and two I had started smoking again to help me over the estrogen roller co... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 695  |  
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Good & Bad Fucking Lessons From Porn Movies

In addition to its ability to cheer you up in times of need, porn has some useful lessons to impart to its viewers. On the other hand, some of these are hideous faux pas that every man should avoid like the plague -- or gonorrhea, for that matter. Then there are the great lessons porn has to offer us all.

Pornography is generally a healthy staple of any man’s life, but beware: Not all porn is helpful to your sex life. Watching porn with your girlfriend can be a great way to learn about each other and have a laugh. Although you'll probably learn most lessons on your own, if you're lucky, yo... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 694  |  
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Chris Grffin pt 1

Chapter 1

This story is just something I made up when I was bored. It's not supposed to be good or bad,just an idea that popped into my head. Also, it's not canon to my other f****y Guy fanfiction,The Unknown Griffin, so don't expect to see Cindy, Britney or Jessica here. Enjoy this...thing.

Hello. You mayhave heardabout me. My name is Chris Griffin, and not much is known about me. I'm mainly considered a "space occupier", among other things, but that's only because everyone's too busypaying attention to either Brian, Stewie or Peter. There's a lot more to me than what is seen on the sur... Continue»
Posted by wsgy411 8 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 695  |  
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