Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 64

The Ultimate Teenage Beach Adventure


"It's just as fat but I believe your dick is only two-thirds as long as
Chip's," said Chelsea, forefinger tapping the moist eye at the top of
the subject item. As she withdrew the fingertip, a thin thread of clear
liquid followed it.

Dolf, to whom the subject item was attached, said, "That means his is
about eight inches. I don't believe it. I've seen his dick."

She cocked an eyebrow. "When it was hard?" Before he could respond she
snorted. "Hard! Why do you guys call it that? They don't really get
_hard_, not like a piece of wood."

"It feels hard to me, like right ... Continue»
Posted by brianbigdogsmith 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
895
  |  
100%
  |  2

Evil Souls Have No Limits (Chapter 2)

Genre- EVERYTHING
Introduction:
This is chapter 2. I am sorry it took me so long but I have been very busy. Secondly I went more mild on the death part in this chapter. Also, there will be some more info added in chapter 3 about the charaters from another story series on here that me and the other arthur are going to connect our stories with. There is a tidbit of info in this chapteron that subject. Second to last point, please give me some feedback on who you would like to see become the next target for amanda's first job and idea's you would like to see. I think some fan interaction and id... Continue»
Posted by qudduse 8 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
894
  |  
100%
  |  1

Slutty Sarah is back

Well guys, slutty Sarah is back. We met up last week and after a meal, I took her back to my place. Throughout the meal, she kept telling me she had something she wanted to tell me later.

Eventually she got around to it. She said “You know Julia got married a couple of days ago, well, he night before she had a party in some big hall. There were about 20 of us there, all girls. I didn’t know beforehand, but some of the girls had arranged for male strippers to show up and strip for us.

Well, it was the first time I’d seen male strippers. Seriously, there bodies were amazing. There were fo... Continue»
Posted by KevinGraves2 2 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
894
  |  
71%

My blind date

Back in my yout at college, (Mr. Campeezi, did you say yout ?), my roommate and a buddy decided to set me up on a blind date. They even pointed her out at a bar one night. She was attractive but not stunning. So, I agreed. We were all going out to a county fair. Of course when we met up, she was not the girl they pointed out. She was tall, very skinny with glasses and a pasty complexion. I didn’t want to be rude but this was going to be difficult. My buddies were almost falling down laughing. Her name was Janet but she kind of had a speech impediment which made it sound like Shanet. I had to ... Continue»
Posted by small_weiner 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
895
  |  
96%
  |  4

My masturbation diary, commencing 11th January 201

We'll even if I'm the only reader of this I hope to get some pleasure in writing. They say writing is a good form of therapy, I'll find out, but in the meanwhile I'll write about my fantasies and actualities. Feel free to contribute. If you don't like what I write about, don't read it.

So I was away for a couple of days, travelling on business, staying at a hotel. Whilst I always hope to meet a lovely woman for some company, the reality is this is never as easy as one's fantasies would suggest. You look at the services card they place on the desk area offering various services. They neve... Continue»
Posted by hartlepoolman 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
892
  |  
100%
  |  6

Im here 4 u if u need me.

Back in 2003, I got locked up for the first time. I only did county time thou. Shackle to others who look scared. Not me thou as the co's put us in the cells we would be doing our time in. My celly wasn't in at the time. I had to get the boat on the floor. I put my Matt in it, made myself at home. It never settle in on me that im locked up yet & this where I'd be for 6 months. So, I went 2 sl**p & tried to get this day over with. Later on I heard the cell door open. The co said to my celly, you have a thug ass roommate waiting for you. My celly said ok. The door was slam shut. My eyes ... Continue»
Posted by fabbie454 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
892
  |  
67%

Craigslist II

I was on fire one night, what I call a manic night. posted an ad on CL. I never read those ads so I don't know what is normal but I was very specific what I wanted. Size, body/build, age range, and that i wanted aggressive endless pounding, something to that effect. in otherwords, i wasn't into the whole foreplay crap where the guy thinks we require them to make us cum to feed their ego before they can get themselves off inside us. That routine drives me nuts. I'd rather he go down on me after, when his cum is there for him to lick up, if anything.
I didn't need to cum, I didn't care if I ca... Continue»
Posted by TabooXtreme13 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
889
  |  
97%
  |  5

Cant sl**p?

'You ok babe?' he asks,still half away in his dream. From the morning glory I feel teasing my back and the way he places his mouth on my neck, I hope he's dreaming of waking up and sliding his cock inside me. I want to feel better, I want to be put back asl**p for awhile so I can sl**p this off. He has what I need.

'I'm feeling a little sick baby, I'm gonna sl**p it of but I can't sl**p right now'. 'Oh' he teases nuzzling his mouth into the point where my spine begins at the top of my back, planting soft gentle kisses on my skin. 'And why is that?' He bear hugs me and turns me around so we ... Continue»
Posted by babyblue69123 17 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
889
  |  
100%
  |  1

A Toy of my Own

Going back home and seeing Gail was an inspiration. But it also made me realize how much I missed getting boned by my old male partner Hank. Or how much I wanted Gail to shove one of her toys up my own ass. Once I discovered that they really weren't metal spikes that is.

After returning to New England I knew what I had to do. The Adult Bookstore was way outside of town in a fuckin' Industrial Park. What the hell it was doing out there I have no clue. Maybe they're putting fork lift motors in vibrators or something, for all I know. At any rate I found the place.

Befo... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
887
  |  
67%
  |  2

My Sexy And Hot Mami



Hi! All reader I am male from Gujarat and I am writing my true story first time. Let me tell u that my English is so low so u finds lot of mistake in my writing but I assure u that u like my true experience. Let’s come to story I am 20 yr old living in small town in Gujarat in my f****y my father mother me and my s****r r there. We are living in city area. Where we have lot of neighbours but one is special for me.

I like alder ladies then girls and the big assets always attract me. One of our neighbors named Chaya. She is 44 yr old she is my fantasy and I always have a crush to fuck he... Continue»
Posted by fairpussy 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
886
  |  
89%

Flashy Toy pickup

Six years ago, my wife purchased a train set off the internet from a woman in San Antonio, Tx. I worked in the area where the woman lived so she asked me to stop by and pick up the trains.

A couple of days later I was working in the area, I work for a fortune 500 company. I called the woman and informed her that I'm minutes away. She had a very soft sexy voice which got me day dreaming of what she looked like. It was around 1pm as I drove through this nice neighborhood. I found the womans home and parked in her driveway. I also noticed the neighbor across the street was sitting in a lawn ch... Continue»
Posted by hearbare 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
882
  |  
80%

Passion Light is Given through Love

They met for the first time by the pool in the moonlight
He Walked up to her to ask her, her name
She looked deep into his eyes her Radiant Beauty ignited the Flame within him to soar like a Wild Fire. She said her name was Claire She was on Vacation from her job in Vermont and always wanted to see California.
Howdy Claire my Name is Stan I usually go to the Mountains this time of year
But decided to just visit the Beaches here.
Near By there was a shack playing some oldies as the stars danced above
Stan asked Claire if he could buy her a drink.
She was pleased to see someone with such ... Continue»
Posted by Tony503 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
880
  |  
100%
  |  2

Waiting For A Chance With Mom




Hi i am Karthi age 23 i am complete my B.Tech n job searching. Right now i got a problem so please tell me friends how can i solve this.

I am living with mom because my dad doing job in another city. So me n mom are staying my home my dad visits every 2 weeks. My mom is very beautiful n 5.6’ height. I had one habit that is when my mom doing bath in bathroom then i am peeping through the ventilator to saw her nude body. I am doing this act in last 3 years. But one day, mom doing bath in bathroom and that time i am peeping
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
879
  |  
100%

mommmy and heavean

Little Lucy went out into the garden and saw her cat Tiddles lying on the ground with its eyes shut and its legs in the air. She fetched her Dad to look at Tiddles, and on seeing the cat he said, as gently as he could, "I'm afraid Tiddles is dead, Lucy."

"So why are his legs sticking up in the air like that, Daddy?" asked Lucy as she fought back the tears.

At a loss for something to say the father replied, Tiddles' legs are pointing straight up in the air so that it will be easier for Jesus to float down from heaven above and grab a leg and lift Tiddles up to heaven."

Little Lucy seem... Continue»
Posted by bluechaser31 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
878
  |  
98%
  |  5

Sienna Grace vs. Santa Claus

Sienna Grace stepped out of the Lincoln before Uncle Terry could come around from the driver's side to open the door for her. This was as usual for her, as she shunned the trappings of "celebrity-status", especially with her devoted companion, Terry. They had pulled up to parking at Macy's at the Mall to look around at the christmas decorations and gifts, the ever-present christmas music everywhere in the background, both inside and out at the Mall. Uncle Terry dressed in casual tweed sport jacket and chinos. Sienna, however, snappily attired in ultra-short skirt and tube top, bright green ... Continue»
Posted by TSSienna 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
877
  |  
100%
  |  9

Not your typical delivery.

I never wanted to work while I was attending college, so I spent the better part of my summers delivering pizza, trying to save up some spending cash for the school year. My friends have always given me shit for my work ethic, but my grades earned me nearly a full ride and my parents picked up the rest of the cost of school, but any party money - I had to earn that myself.

Since I didn’t want to work at all during the school year, I had to work Fridays and Saturdays all summer, to get the most tips I could. It wasn’t too awful. My other friends who came back home (or stayed behind) would ... Continue»
Posted by cvilleguy74 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
878
  |  
100%

I had sex in a shed. i was proud.

As alot of you now know im engaged to this boy who's really lovely. and i love him as much as he loves me, i visited his mums house and well we was aloud to sl**p over, the problem was that the walls were'nt sound proof and so we was worried if she would hear us bumping the tunnel.. so we went outside, was looking around and we saw the shed at the back of the garden, "Hey this looks like a good place" i said "You sure hun, it looks dirty and old". "I don't care live a little babe XD" i said. and we opened it and closed it, locked it from the inside, he started to touch me up, feeling my ass, a... Continue»
Posted by LittleMissy 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
873
  |  
66%
  |  1

Theatrical.......16

Theatrical…… 16
I woke with my husband kneeling beside the couch shaking me gently, I had disposed of the evidence the night before during a toilet visit, “sweetheart” he said, “yes” I said sl**pily, “I’m sorry about last night, I was being a prick and I know it, I know that things have not been good for a while but I will make it up to you, I promise, I had thought about taking you out this weekend but you seem to have scuppered that with your own plans” he said, I, leaned forward and kissed him, “why on earth didn’t you say, I have promised Mary and Julia now, if you had mentioned it I cou... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
873
  |  
100%

Katy's Reluctant New Look Ch. 01

(Sexy conservative wife is put into uncomfortable situations)

"You look so good in your Calvin Klein suit, darling!" I told Jake as he hurried out the door with his orange juice sloshing out of the glass and across his fingers. He was running late for the sales meeting at the brokerage.

I love my husband so much! He's not one of those pretty boy types. Instead, he's a man's man; big, strong and very capable of taking care of himself in any situation, physical or otherwise! Jake's the kind of guy that knows what he wants and gets it. I guess that's why he has me!

"Thanks, Katy! You kno... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
872
  |  
85%
  |  2

Made Love To My Neighbour Priya In The Rain


Hi I am Arjun from Varanasi. I am working as an analyst in a MNC in Kerala. I have been working here for last 2 years but I have not learned Malayalam yet, just know a little bit of it. Life was not so good here then this day has arrived. It was a normal day for me, I went to buy some eatables from a nearby small shop and I asked the shopkeeper in Hindi to give me some stuff. I saw a beautiful lady standing there having a hard time to make him understand in English to buy something. I again shouted in Hindi “Please give me my s... Continue»
Posted by bava12 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
874
  |  
100%