Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 110

Theatrical....2

Theatrical … 2

You remember at the end of “Theatrical” how I told you that I had not seen the guy from the theatre since he fucked me in the disabled toilets and how much he meant to me, how I had been looking out for him, well!! I’ve seen him again,…… yes!!, in the city with his wife, I was walking through one of the arcades and I spotted him in front, he is really easy to notice because he is so tall, well my heart stopped when I realised it was him but then I thought “how can I make him see me, maybe he has been looking for me, I have got to make him see me, make eye contact” so I turned... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 231  |  
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Invitation to a Beach, Chapter 9

Chapter 9.

We rested awhile, lying in the soft grass under a warm spring sun. It was my idea of a perfect place to fuck. I imagined how going to this place as a teen would have made me grow up a very different person.

Soon, we started the walk back toward camp. We stopped several times, and Max pointed out some of the interesting flowers and trees around us. At one stop, Max turned to face the side of the trail and started to pee into a bush. He held his cock casually in one hand and just let it flow.

“I wish I could do that,” I commented. I really had to pee. “I shoulda gone before w... Continue»
Posted by ellenbeachbabe 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 230  |  
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I Wish I Knew

This was actually a song writing attempt from the 90's...hence the odd form...

I Wish I Knew

Where did you come from, who are you?
Where do you live, what do you do?
Did we share a bottle, did we share a drink?
Did we discuss what each of us think?
But you're lying next to me all the same,
I just wish I could remember your name.

How did you get here, did you drive your car?
Or did we meet in that corner bar?
Did I walk you home, did I hold the door?
Did you find me interesting or another bore?
But you're lying next to me all the same,
I just wish I could rememb... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 230  |  
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Muddin

Kent held his book in one hand and sc****d dirt off the side of his sneaker with a stick he held in the other. Deciding to read his assigned chapter on a bench in front of the English building on the nicest day of the year was a big mistake, Kent thought. Waaaaaaaaaaay too easy to get distracted out here.

A deep purr caught Kent’s ear and grew louder as an old pick-up truck rounded the corner and slid into one of the student parking spaces. Dried mud was splattered across the entire truck like it was a mobile Jackson Pollack canvas. Kent trained his eye on the vehicle as the driver’s door ... Continue»
Posted by coedwrestle 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 229  |  
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Brief sex 03 - Sex on the circuit

Brief sex 03 - Sex on the circuit
3 brief sex

Quick fuck on the circuit


I love cars, speed and motorsport. When I was younger I would run a few rallies, but mostly hill climbs and then came the great era of fol'car races on dirt, not the stock not matter competitors to type .. it goes f *** e sometimes but never direct attack .. is of the race .. speed.

As in other disciplines .. a lot of women come to see .. I know they like the atmosphere that are the guys to battle it's amazing but true .. and a lot of pretty girls roam the stands. This weekend's a pretty little brunette ... Continue»
Posted by CinquantNERF 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 229  |  
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Smurfette's Absolution part2

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that were created by someone else

Claimer: Go to my profile to view my characters

I didn't went outside for anything for the entire day, I stayed indoors and shut myself awayfrom the outside world. I was so hurt that I couldn't thinkstraight, I couldn't listen, nor do I wanna speakto anybody. It felt like the worldhad ended for me and my life is over. Luckily Rachael stayed by my side during the entire day, she only leaves if she needs to use the bathroom, or take me tothe bathroom.

Papa Smurf finally found out about what happenedand stopped by ... Continue»
Posted by wsgy411 11 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 229  |  
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After I Die I Want to Come Back as a Lesbian - May

After I Die I Want to Come Back as A Lesbian - Maybe

I love pussy! It's my favorite food! I don't just LOVE pussy; I ADORE it! I even love the WORD "pussy!" I love to look at it; I love to think about it; I love to touch it and to feel it and to kiss it and lick it and rub my nose in it. Anyone who has one is my kind of person! This is why I once had the thought that after I die I would LOVE to come back in my next life as a lesbian!

Lesbians seem to have SOOOOO much fun with each other. They can do most of the things that guys can do for them, and they can do them BETTER because... Continue»
Posted by George178 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 228  |  
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The Word Fuck

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.

In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.
•It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).
•It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).
•It can also be used as an adje... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 226  |  
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Perfect girlfriend has a big sex drive!

Apart from this, the perfect girlfriend is a career-minded woman who earns more than their partner but at the same time wants to stay at home and bring up the c***dren.

The clue to these seemingly contradictory demands lies in the men polled, 3,000 bachelors.

Near the top of their girlfriend checklist is the requirement that she should have a "pert bottom" – which may explain why they are still single.

And while three-quarters of the men polled said their ideal woman would keep her weight in check, 89 per cent also wanted her to tuck into a big meal without worrying. These perfect ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 226  |  
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Ménage A Trois by Ghipster

Ménage A Trois by Ghipster

“Our cocks are no bigger than white men’s cock”. I shouted to the applauding audience of the university’s Jr. KKK Fraternity “And I speak for all black men everywhere, when I say,
THANK YOU! Thank you for this flattering but preposterous myth. And they say white folks ain’t done nothing for us. Ha!”
This unbelievable line of bullshit yielded me a standing ovation and an session of signing autographs afterwards. Little did anyone know, I did the whole lecture strictly on a dare from my pot-head roommates. But such was the life back in the glory days of coll... Continue»
Posted by ghipster 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 226

Our Life As A Couple

Continued on from my story.

so christmas has come and gone.

It was a rather hectic one. 24-27th of christmas at my parents house and the 27th-30th was at my darling bappys. so many good memories. so much to catch up on eh.

over the christmas period i'd come to realize all relationships were based around sex even if they say it doesn't. women use it for their own advantage, men use it as a release of pressure and its been proven in my relationship recently. christmas came with a strawberry flavour and some dirty talk driving the parents to leaving the house as soon as they heard the b... Continue»
Posted by maaao 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 225  |  
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The The Nurse's Uniform, the Pink Vibrator an

It was September and as it was my birthday, I had booked Jan for my birthday treat - an afternoon of sexual lust at her discreetly located house in the suburbs. I had made several visits before and we had explored and enjoyed each other's bodies getting more adventurous each time. I onw counted as one of her "regulars".

When I rang to make the booking, Jan (always the true professional) uttered those five sexy words which are always a big turn-on, "How do you want me?". Well, on previous occasions I had tried the usual: black stockings and bra; a basque with her tits deliciously exposed; an... Continue»
Posted by Mavic 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 225  |  
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Bounty Part One

Her name is Elisa Grumway and although she may look like a Supermodel she is anything but.

She drinks to much, smokes cheap cigars and eats more McDonalds than a long haul trucker and yet she has an amazing figure. When asked how she pulls it off she always answers:

"Good Genes and lots of Running"

Elisa is a Bail Enf***ement Officer aka Bounty Hunter.

You may ask how a Woman who looks like so stunning and should be prancing down a Catwalk in Milan fell into the Hunting game, well it all began Two years earlier.

After being "dismissed" from a brief stint as Mrs. Cluck (a cos... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 225  |  
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Airplane

"D-234 is on line, we approching to destination. End over".
"Your stewardess are so wet, please my honey fuck me, forget this airplane".
"What aboat the people inside?"
"Let them and fuck me pilot".
"Hmmm your is on me know, what a fealing hmmm".
"I will show you that I have a monster for you".
"Yes tell me that thing, I become so wet". "Here is my tits hmmm".
"Yes nice tits hmmm".
"Let`s finished that I can`t stand it so long".
"Here is ohhhhhh".
"Nice fuck my pilot". "But there is a one thing".
"What?"
"Your destination is too far away, you missed that".
"Ooo crap look what you... Continue»
Posted by jopaoux 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  Views: 224  |  
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Renaissance Man - No Sex But How To Be A Guy Women

If you are a nice guy then you are a Renaissance Man.

Never put yourself down as average or guy next door.
Nothing wrong with being a nice guy.
You can role play, but inside women will sense a player vs a man.

Women who do play or desire sex here are not sluts despite what they may post.
That is just a label...they are still women inside.
Just as not all who are on here are perverts, but mostly real men and women who either find it an escape or way to hook up and satisfy their needs.
If a woman is f***ed into a sex role by her man then be aware it might not be the fantasy it a... Continue»
Posted by asianflyer 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 225  |  
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Clothespin Girl Superhero

Once a upon a time, a long long time ago yesterday in fact. Today I began my plan to catch the elusive one. The one who rescues clothespins from clotheslines. The plan was a simple one to string up 7 clotheslines facing the wind knowing that if she was near that she might hear the cries of the clothespins. Now that the 7 lines were up I just had to wait and hope the wind would do it's job and carry the cries of the clothespins. This quest started years ago when I first put a clothespin on my penis. And today was going to be the day that I'd finally meet my fantasy girl. With the 7,000 clothesp... Continue»
Posted by janthony57 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 223  |  
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Dive bar

Dive Bar.



Not being a big drinker there are not many bar stories that I can tell but I do have this one that is just so out there it’s hard to believe.



And I was there.



I’ve always been a motorcycle rider, it started out that I need transportation that was cheap starting a f****y on a retail pay limits your budget. So 10 year old Hondas or Kawasaki’s were what I could get.



Well after riding in any weather cold, wet, sleet and snow most people that I worked with or passed me on the road or were passed by thought that I was crazy or just one hard ass.



And I n... Continue»
Posted by MountainMan66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 223  |  
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good and bad

Bad: You find a porn movie in your son's room.
Worse: You're in it.

Bad: Your c***dren are sexually active.
Worse: With each other.

Good: The teacher likes your son.
Bad: Sexually.

Good: You go to see a strip show.
Bad: Your daughter's the headliner.

Good: Your boyfriend's exercising.
Bad: So he'll fit in your clothes.

Good: Your daughter's on the Pill.
Bad: She's eleven.

Good: Your wife meets you at the door nude.
Bad: She's coming home.
... Continue»
Posted by bluechaser31 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
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A Little Bite to Eat

You get home from the gym and call out to me that you are going to the shower, and you hear me mumble something back. You think nothing of it, assuming that there was something on TV.

Once you get upstairs you can smell the freesia candles burning. You glance into the bathroom and see it lit up with candles. You know I will be up shortly to join you, so you rip your cloths off and toss them into the bedroom and hop into the shower. You stand under the hot pulsating water. You are enjoying the feel of the hot water caressing your body, and you don't even notice me coming into the shower, unt... Continue»
Posted by bdpro 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
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Love of food

*Another food play: this is a fantasy...*

I love food. Now don't get me wrong everyone loves food but I found my love of food through cooking class. Now I know the intro part is going to be mundane...
Hi my name is Melody but I like being called Mel for short. I'm 5, 3 with long curly red hair and green eyes. I have a bad temper...I have a curvy figure.
There now that's settled let's go on with the story.
  I was sitting in my room one warm Saturday evening eating strawberries with chocolate cream. There was other stuff laid out like berries and whipped cream along with other exotic frui... Continue»
Posted by ForeverGold101 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
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