Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 109

It's All About Sex (Honestly)

I saw this on someone else page and they're always interesting so I figured what the hell...



What’s your favorite place to be kissed?
Lips, but I enjoy being kissed all over...

What’s your favorite color lingerie?
Personally, I don't wear it, however, black or red, if it's on a lady...

What color panties are you wearing?
Blue Boxers, not into ladies underwear, unless it'#s on a lady...lol...

What’s your favorite sexual position?
Woman on top...

Do you prefer strawberries with whipped cream or chocolate?
Whipped cream, defo...

Do you prefer sex beneath the sheets or o... Continue»
Posted by muttleyh 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 242

Five Games - Short Story

Virginia Ross, 21, unemployed, would like to be a ..., but the men in town are all too familiar or then too ugly. So she has always an eye on the good-looking tourist that appear from time to time. And even when her game of seducement isn't always working out, in her erotic fantasies she never looses a good hanky-panky. Here is her favourite one:

I'm just hanging in the half-empty hotel bar, I'm sipping my last beer as this handsome young tourist suddenly comes in. He spots me instantly and offers me a drink. I'm very grateful and offer, to play a game of pool with him. I'm very good at p... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 241  |  
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my new life...part 7

'niether is he! 'alexandras master yells.alexandra and i turn to see our beloved masters.' master!' we shout.'dont get so full of yourself leon' james laughed'same to you cathrine' said kiki. james walks up to me and puts the gun to my head.'tisk tisk,i still cant belive you threw it all away.' james sighed. james slowly reloaded the gun,wich was already loaded, to give it more power.he put it back to my head.'NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!DONT HURT HER!!!' alexandra scremt thrashing about in his bonds.' HA! isnt this sweet!alexandra has fallin in love with her!HA!'james laughed.kiki laughed her gun pointed ... Continue»
Posted by sex-is-my-obsesion 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 241  |  
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A Lunchbreak

(Mark rushes home to her bedroom for lunch)

Mark called home, his meeting had been canceled and he decided to come home for lunch. Of course, with an hour's drive to get home, he hoped it would actually be lunch and a whole lot more. The k**s were at school and it had been a while since him and his wife had done anything, so Mark was hopeful.

Allison knew exactly how to serve lunch, and it had very little to with cooking or food. Fully aware of the opportunity, she changed out of her everyday clothes, noticing how firm her nipples already were and seeing the tell-tale damp spot in her pa... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 240  |  
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my first

Srinu mera naam, meri middle class f****y me mom, dad, didi sindhu
aur choti behan priyaanka(priya) ek chote se ghar me rehte the. Mom
dad dono employers the didi ki marriage ho gayi thi, priya school ke
final exam likh chuki hi. Mai ghar ke paas hi apni degree kar raha
hun, lekin kahaani sirf meri choti behan priya ki hi.
Priya ko nursery se aaj tak residencial school me hi padhaaya gaya
tha, isi kaaran sab use bohut laad karte the, f****y se door rehne se
use ghar ki tameej maloom nahi thi aur wo itni jiddi thi ki uski baat
ke saamne kuch nahi chalta tha, jitni jiddi thi utni sundar ... Continue»
Posted by akashcoool8 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 240

inside of her pt3

there bodies were drapped in a golden hue they had tattos of other woman on there bodies the images were almost alive like they could reach out and touch you see this i payed no attention to the first time because lights were off and my mind was feeled with such sexual passion that i did nt notice these things but when it came to the light i def... notice that they were different you see these were woman of the rain , of water meaning that there non existing but they are because ,i can see them ,i can smell them ,and i sure as hell can feel them so call it what you will .My Golden Godess "... Continue»
Posted by dblac2 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 239  |  
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Only the British would get this one!..............



Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a Double Decker.

It was just After Eight.

They got off at Quality Street .

He asked her name. 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said with a Wispa.

'I'm Marathon , the one with the nuts' he replied.

He touched her Cream Eggs, which was a Kinder Surprise for her.

Then he slipped his hand into her Snickers, which made her Ripple.

He fondled her Jelly Babies and she rubbed his Tic Tacs.

Soon they were Heart Throbs.

It was a Fab moment as she screamed in Turkish Delight.

But, 3 days later, his Sherbet Dip Dab started to itch.
... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 240  |  
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jagerbomb stories pt 1

One of my favorite drinks is the jagerbomb, for those of you who never had this drink , it when you mix red bull and jager together . I know the Germans must haven taken the lost in WWII in good spirit because they made one hell of a liquor with Jagermeister. It one night and a crazy booty call to make this drink shoot to the top of my all time favorite list of drinks .

I was living back in NYC in 2008 , and I been talking to this cute dark skin latina woman , I think I meet her on tagged , or one of those social media sites . I had her cell number and talk to her about meeting up . She fin... Continue»
Posted by rudepunkfoc174 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 239  |  
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Gabriel's Story

My Husband's story. Here he goes by Gabriel because that is his profile in xhamster. This is part 1. I thought I would post it here.

Hello and thank you for stopping by.



I am Gabriel and my mission is to explore and try to understand my own sexuality and the sexuality of others, and have fun while doing that.


My very first memory of anything remotely sexual... Continue»
Posted by Gabriels-Oboe 6 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 239  |  
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I MADE A PORN MOVIE !!

I did a porn movie just before Xmas last year! Now why would you think that anyone would want to see a sixty-six year old male doing silly things naked with two other guys? Well they do and they pay to see these things.

It was all very surreal when you consider that I went down to Bournemouth to do it; I would not consider Bournemouth to be a centre for too many things, let alone porn movies of gay old farts in full flight.

I was picked up at the railway station and in that moment I had met the cameraman, producer, director, sound man, lighting man, Foley artist, hairdresser, make up c... Continue»
Posted by AussieJonno 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 238  |  
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Dirty Tales From the Past

I enjoy when my wife talks to me about her previous experiences while we're fucking. I suspected she had an active past before she met me, but until I got her to open up, I had no idea! She tells the stories to me while she blows me or fucks me, and she tells them with many details. I lay back, listen, and feel her work me. It's almost like I was there with her when they happened.

Here's one of her many tales:

Her first black man was when she turned eighteen, just after her birthday. He was in his late 20's. She volunteered as a candy striper in a local hospital. He was an orderly. Whil... Continue»
Posted by jnc_1987 1 year ago  |  Categories: , Sex Humor, Shemales  |  Views: 238

New Life Part 3

Part 3
"are you just about ready dear?" Linda inquired as she put the last of her face on.
"I am, sweet heart, we'd better get going or we're going to be late," Braxton retorted as he cinched his tie into place and gave it the usual wiggle to make sure we wasn't going to choke. "Alright sweetie, going to get the car, I'll be waiting for you out front." yes sir, she smirked as he fled out of the door.
She then grabbed her hand bag and made her way out of the front door, where her car and super handsome driver awaited. However just as she was about to open the door, Braxton in a flash had ... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 237  |  
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Rinku - The Party



Mohit’s (my husband) eyes almost popped out of their sockets as I stepped out from the bedroom.
I was wearing a white bikini top blouse & a shimmering silvery transparent sari which I had worn as low as possible. I had tied up my silky brown hair in a loose top knot leaving my fair smooth back bare naked except for the thin white string which held in place the two small patches of white fabric on my boobs.
He glared at me without a word.
“What’s wrong darling?” I s
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 10 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 238

Stitching Frankengirl Together: a Halloween Treat

Halloween is my favorite holiday. It combines candy, monsters, horror movies, ancient pagan rituals, booze, partying all night, fake bl**d, and hot girls in sexy costumes. On top of everything else, Halloween, a night given over to fun, fantasy, and revelry, is by far the sexiest holiday of them all (shove off Valentine's Day).

I always use October as a chance to revisit my favorite monster movies, the glorious black and white classics like Dracula, The Wolfman, The Mummy, and my favorites, Frankenstein and the even better Bride of Frankenstein. Now, Doctor Frankenstein had a bright idea, ... Continue»
Posted by Regrets 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 234  |  
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A goth´s good time

All my stories are true

2010, August 31
About 9:25 pm

This story is a rough prologue to
A dominate goth
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/41234.html
and
Vengeance is sweet
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/55130.html

As always you can find the animated pictures in my profile

Despite is was the last day of august the temperatures once again shot up. I don't know the exact temperatures by today, but it was so hot that every sunbeam hurts. Therefore I was extremely eased it already had cooled down a bit due to the daytime. The sun already had sunk and a brisk wind blew. Fr... Continue»
Posted by Bea69 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 234  |  
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Mary (ditched the lamb & got herself some slut

Mary had a little skirt
Which split up either side
And everywhere that Mary went
The boys could see her thighs

Mary had another skirt
Which split right up the front
And everywhere that Mary went
The boys (& girls) could play with her CUNT... Continue»
Posted by Lil_Nicky 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 233  |  
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Top Clues that your Woman Is Cheating On You

Short of walking in on your wife or girlfriend doing unspeakable things with another dude, there's no foolproof way to know if she's cheating on you. But there are clues — thing is, you probably don't notice any of them.

But we know two guys who do — in fact, it's their job. Between them, Christopher Paoletti, president of Infidelity Investigations LLC, and Tony DeLorenzo, co-author of The 28 Tell-Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse, they have about 45 years of experience hunting down cheaters. So we asked them to tell us what sort of behavior is a tip of that a woman might be cheating on you.
... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 235  |  
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Sexy Fairytale part 8

Kristen awoke as the sun was coming through the leaves of the trees... she felt completely refreshed, and rather glad to be so well-clothed.

As she walked along, she found a little side-path that led to a stream... thinking it would be nice to take a bath, Kristen stripped off her peasant-girl outfit that she'd gotten from the b**st's castle and climbed in. Splashing and playing she almost felt like an entirely new person!

Suddenly, the whinny of a horse made her turn around... and she gasped. The most beautiful man she'd ever seen in her entire life was atop the horse, in fine glitterin... Continue»
Posted by drew1207 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 233  |  
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£14.00

I am way to scared to go dogging and can be a bit shy to go to gay venues but I have needs and as a sub bottom I really do need to be comprehensively shagged; the more often the better.

Some time ago I went to a 'north' London sauna once and when I walked in the door the fellow at the counter asked me if I realised it was a Gay sauna. I am a very straight looking guy and if you thought I was gay you may say a very dominant top, but the truth lies elsewhere.

I told the young fellow that I realised what the establishment provided and after the payment of the obligatory £14 I went in.

I... Continue»
Posted by AussieJonno 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 232  |  
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Terrible Headaches..!!!

Two old guys were sitting in the park, talking, when the subject
turned to getting older. The first guy said "Women have all the luck
when it comes to getting older."
"What do you mean?" asked the second guy.
"Well," replied the first. "I can barely remember the last time I got
aroused in bed, but my wife is healthier than ever!"
"Healthier? How is that?" his buddy wondered.
"Years ago, when we were younger, almost every night before bed she'd
get these terrible headaches." he answered. "Now that we're older, she
hasn't had a headache in years."

... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 231  |  
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