Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 108

Sex Life of an Electron

by Eddy Current

One night, when his charge was pretty high, Micro Farad decided to try to
get a cute little coil to let him discharge. He picked up Millie Amp and
took her for a ride on his megacycle. They rode across the wheatstone
bridge around by the sine wave and stopped in a magnetic field by a flowing
current.


Micro Farad, attracted by Millie's characteristic curves, soon had his
resistance at a minimum and his field fully excited. He laid her on the
ground potential, raised her frequency, lowered her capacitance, and pulled
out his high voltage probe. He inserted it ... Continue»
Posted by vstein 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 10

Dear Dirty Diary,

A week had passed and Doug announced the completion of our new bed. I checked out all its clothing drawers, the sliding compartments in the headboard and its bed linen bin at its foot. I ran my fingers all over its satin-finished pine and had to admit it was really handsome. My husband had done a beautiful job, but I was concerned with how we’d transport it to Quebec. He told me it was all assembled with deck screws and could be easily broken down into pieces. He said the drawers, filled with all our clothing and bedding could be stacked on top of the framework pieces.... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Pussy Worship

Here is my story to answer a curious person on my blog at ifounddaddy.tumblr.com:

smallwhiteguy asked: yeah i think u should let your friend your worship your pussy and how is your friend going to worship your pussy? did the guy fuck u really good? [He is referencing another guy I fucked earlier that day in the second question.]


Me: Thanks for keeping my tumblr fresh with some stories I might not have told, and drawing all the details out. You are in for some loooong answers.

Well, turns out that I did see my friend. How does he worship it, well, he starts by letting... Continue»
Posted by Missy_X 2 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Fucked 3: The Abbey

There is nothing remotely remarkable about this story, two consenting adults of the opposite sex -
albeit with quite an age gap - but basically just two co workers fucking in a hotel room. It was, for
whatever reason REALLY erotic, so I just hope I can tell the story well enough to put it across:

In the stories Fucked and Fucked2 I ended up having a romp with my 19 - years - older colleague, Derek,
and his on/off girlfriend the GORGEOUS Elaine, and then (in Fucked 2) I just Fucked everybody else.

This was the first time Derek and I had actually been 'one on one'.

We were on ... Continue»
Posted by joanne1976 8 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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How to maintain a healthy sex drive

Obesity, diabetes, high bl**d pressure, thyroid dysfunction, adrenal exhaustion, poor nutrition, prescription medications, hormonal birth control, too much stress and too little sl**p. Many factors determine a healthy sex drive and today we're looking at what determines a healthy sex drive and how to maintain it.

Factors that determine a healthy sex drive
Sex hormones – For women both estrogen and testosterone at healthy levels are very vital in maintaining libido as well as fertility. In men too, testosterone is vital. Men with clinically defined low libido are often diagnosed with low ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Billiards Room

The billiards room of The Water Poet is, using the British system, on the first floor of the building. There are only two doors in the room and one of those is a janitorial closet; the only entrance in or out is the one through which I push you after we've ascended the old wooden staircase, my hand in the small of your back guiding you the entire time.

It is an old room, one of the few not to have had a significant makeover when the pub was refurbished a few years past. The wallpaper has been updated, a not altogether unsuccessful attempt to eradicate a century of cigarette smoke ingraine... Continue»
Posted by tristramrandy 4 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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Increase Intimacy in your Relationship

Describe all your feelings, omitting the Shakespearean sonnets. Work out your fantasies. Ask open-ended questions, and be supportive of whatever answer that opens up. Softly whispering what you are going to do to each other will also increase sexual tension. Show your partner that you are willing to pleasure them.

Kiss to Kindle

There is nothing more exciting than a long, sensual kiss. It is seductive and intimate. Proper kissing requires proper pressure and moves. Kissing can start from anywhere, anytime, even before you reach the bedroom. If you really want to get in the right mood, ki... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Theatrical......5

Theatrical……. 5

I was still holding his head and I rested my forehead against his, “I love you, do you know that, have you any idea how much I love you and thank you for this morning, how long was I out for?” I asked, “oh! about 10 minutes, and there is no need to thank me, you were fabulous and I hope you got what you wanted as I suspect that there was a tiny bit of fantasy being lived in you choosing to fuck a black guy” he said,
I could feel myself blushing, “maybe just a little bit of a one” I said softly, “do you have any more that we can attend to?” he asked, “if it means I can see... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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one night in a lift with a hot girl...:xxx

Frstt of i'll thanx my frndz that they like ma first story...and now this is ma second story iam realy a sexy guy love to fuck grlz...ok that story is abut that time when iam in spain with my b*****r...by big b*****r..is also love to fuck grlz..i realy enjoyed there..i saw there tow many hot chicks..
gosh...i just want to fuck any grl...but i got no chance...there....then one day..i go in a mall with ma b*o....there...i saw too many hot chicks...ma b*o ask me that why should you go on the second floor u'll enjoye and i go there .
when iam in lift there i saw there a hot grl..in sh... Continue»
Posted by pussy_lover42 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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is this sex? pt 2

man that was one hellava night the sex was priceless ,the sl**p extra well rested lol.I expected sex what i did not expect was a good fucking like that she was a pro when she bent over thats all she wrote.Recovering i decided to take a shower when i heard a lil laugh , see i was in the bed contenplaton when that laugh that i keep hearing became louder "HOLY SHIT" she was in the bed laying with me the whole time reminising i had not got up to piss or any thing i simply opened my eyes and started to think she popped her head up from the covers and said great sex hun? I replied yes ver... Continue»
Posted by dblac2 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Laptop Love

I try balancing the laptop on my knees as my left hand fumbles through my underwear, fumbling to get a hold of my hard cock to free him from the tighter and tighter confines of my boxer-briefs. All the while, my right hand clicks furiously on the left button of the mouse -- trying to find a pornographic scene that I am satisfied will put me over the top. A scene that is not too long but not too short. A scene that will not only keep my dick hard but also make me so hot, that I will cum like I have never cum before. After clicking through several porn scenes of various genres of perversions, I ... Continue»
Posted by rightntwo 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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The Talk (Fifth stab at humor in sex)

Man talks to his eleven-year-old son about sex...fifth stab at humor...

The Talk (Fifth stab at humor in sex)

Hello everyone. I know I talked about my ex-wife and mentioned my daughter briefly, but I never mentioned my son. His name is Mike. I just had to bring him up since this being a sex theme site, I was reminded of a talk we had some years ago. You know the talk. Oh yes, that talk. I can't recall how it went exactly, but I think it went something like this.

I was sitting around the kitchen table with my wife Kim. I had a bourbon in front of me and I was looking for... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dibs

None of my friends liked Dibs, I don't even
think they knew his real name, just the stupid
nickname some sarcastic teacher gave him.
Dibs was very quiet, never spoke much, seemed to
have no friends. None except me that is. My friends
made fun of him, teased him or ignored him. Well
everyone did really. But I liked him. I liked his
resilience, never seeming to care that he wasn't
part of the social scene. I liked the way that he
was so much clever than everyone, including the teachers
but he was never arrogant. In fact he tried to hide
his intelligence sensing that it ... Continue»
Posted by celcus 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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The Queen

My quest to find the Queen of Sex Fantasy Land in search of the ultimate sexual experience...

The Queen.

I am so ashamed. I am just so ashamed of myself, you have no idea. I have been so bad I should be punished by one or two of you fine looking women. Really, I have been a bad boy. I have let you people down big time. Oh yes, I really did it this time. Here I am on an adult web site and what do I write? c***dish nonsense about lost tribes of wild women, going back to the Garden Of Eden, girls tied to fences. Utter nonsense. Here you people are out there, expecting some hot... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Ambushed Part 1

By the fall of 1976 Elizette and I had been deeply involved for over a year. A petite Brazilian, she had jet black hair the length of her back, flawless bronze skin, large, dark brown eyes, and a lissome, graceful body. At twenty, she was almost insatiably sexual. We would have sex five or six times a week, sometimes three times a day. Everything from long languid afternoons of massage and foreplay to quickies in public places. Once at a baseball game she sat on my lap in a tactically parted wrap around skirt. On another, we fuck like mink, buck naked, on the altar of a Catholic church und... Continue»
Posted by anacharsis 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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nmdwji writes pre cum dripped at the tip of his di



See Part 3 below! Conan The Barbarian Part4: The amazon needed to get away while it was still dark and Conan's men were sl**ping. She picked Conan up as if he were a doll and threw him on his back on his own horse and jumped on top of him so that he was pinned beneath her. Her huge ass was towards his face. She reached back and placed a leather strap behind his head and pulled his face forward so that his mouth was in her ass and tied the ends of the strap to the front of her waist. Conan's face was now tied to her ass so tightly he couldn't move his head in any direction. "I want that ton... Continue»
Posted by Lateshay 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Just a movie

"... and a large buttered popcorn." He finishes ordering, turns to me and asks, "Anything else?"

"Chocolate," I answer, pointing to the box of nonpareils in the glass case.

"Little bedazzled nipples," I whisper in his ear.

His snort of laughter startles the clerk who smiles nervously as she completes our order.

Gathering up our snacks, we head to the corridor behind the concession stand, walk down the dark hall and find the door.

"Here okay?" he asks, pausing at a short row of seats tucked away in the very back of the room. Judging from their boisterous behavior, the handful o... Continue»
Posted by Chris_total 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Nothing but fun!

He opened the door to her and took a long look at her. She was wearing a short black skirt, black fishnets with knee boots and a low cut top that showed her amazing big tits, he remembered she had told him that they were 36DD.

"You came" he said as she walked in. He was suprised that she was there as they had met through a website and she had told him she had a boyfriend. Although that didn't matter to her as she had met him by cheating on her ex-husband.

He offered her a coffee to which she said "I'm here for something hot and black hun but it isn't coffee" She then threw her arms arou... Continue»
Posted by lisa5217 1 year ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Knowing the Right Size

If your bra is uncomfortable, it's the wrong one for your body. If you don't look better with it than without it, it's the wrong one for your body.

It really is that simple. But here are some more specific clues that you need to go back to the lingerie department:

• The straps are either falling off or digging into your shoulders
• The band either pinches your rib cage or rides up in back.
• The cups gape or your breasts are oozing out of them (sometimes causing a "dented" look under clothes).
• The underwire either digs into your rib cage or catches your arms when you swing them forw... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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A Devilish Fairy Tale

A Devilish Fairy Tale by Paddy57



Let me tell you a tail of two little devils called Sparky and Brandy.

The Sparky-Devil was not worldly wise and he like all male devils scurried around with massive pair of horns on his head, a little forked tail and a massive erection, ever upward in his mind. He sought one thing - sex. His whole function in life was to make she-devils squeal with pleasure.

The Brandy-Devil was a she-devil, and like all she-devils she liked to Brandy poor he-devils. She would lay traps for them and Brandy them, make fun of their horns, tweak their tails and fi... Continue»
Posted by paddy57 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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