Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 108

Smackin' Down The Broski

Following the SmackDown television tapings on July 26, 2011 at Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania's Wells Fargo Center, SmackDown General Manager Teddy Long is
leaving his office. "Teddy... b*o.... Before you go I got a great idea!" Zack
Ryder says as a he approaches Teddy while sighs as his newly assigned
assistant comes towards him.

"Zack... the show's over..." Teddy Long says as he looks at the Long Island
Superstar.

"b*o are you serious? This the WWE... the show's never over!" Zack smiles.

Teddy sighs again, "What is it now Zack?"

"b*o... I got a great idea...The Diva Broski ... Continue»
Posted by camdogg 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  
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The Sexual Awakening Part 6: Playing with Fire

I awoke the next morning to an empty bed. I looked around and saw a note lying on the pillow next to me. "Sorry to screw and run, but I had an early call time this morning. Hope to see you again."

I began to replay the events on the previous night in my mind. I could feel myself getting hard just thinking about her soft skin, her firm breasts and most of all that wonderful pussy. How we tumbled out of the shower and collapsed on the bed. How she took immediate control and used me as nothing more than a tool to satisfy her carnal desire. The look of pure joy on her face as she bounced up an... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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five gold rings

26 December 2008

Darling, just a quick thank you note for my lovely Christmas present. A partridge in a pear tree, how unusual! You are SO thoughtful. I love you to bits

27 December 2008

Darling, thank you thank you thank you! Two turtle doves, how very sweet of you! You are such a romantic! Lots of love!!

28 December 2008

Thank you for the three French hens, darling, I suppose I can use the eggs. Bye for now.

30 December 2008

Hello sweetheart, I'm sorry about not writing yesterday but to be honest I was a bit worried about all these presents you were buying and I'm still ... Continue»
Posted by Jim-Nice-But-Dim 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Are You A Porn Star?

Just for fun, an interesting analysis of data from the Internet Adult Film Data Base of some 7000 females and 3000 males.

Data is US-centric and percentage discussions are of women unless otherwise noted.

Weight is the biggest distinction between porn stars and the general population.

Porn stars are quite a bit lighter. At 117 lbs, the average female performer is a considerable 48 lbs under the national average for women, and the average male, at 167.5 lbs, weighs 27 lbs less than the national average for men.

The average male and female performer are the same height as the average... Continue»
Posted by billstew 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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TOT Part 8 Spunky Socks

The following weekend we headed down to the Caravan on the Thursday afternoon Mum, Dad, Me and Jamie. My oldest b*****r John was not interested in the caravan he wanted to stay home on his own, probably having wild parties.
As soon as we arrived at the campsite I wanted to go straight to the shower room but of course I could not it would have looked very suspicious.


I checked Barry’s caravan but no one was there, even the games room was very quite only two older guys playing pool were there, Me and Jamie wandered about the site but we never saw any of the crowd that had been there the w... Continue»
Posted by talesofted 2 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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The Booty Inspector of the Old West (part 2)

The Booty Inspector (part 2) by markfayer

Dick jones woke up with his tail between his legs – literally his schlong was tucked back up underneath his taint and was poking out between his butt-cheeks.
“Where am I?” he groggily queried aloud.
Then he noticed the 2 large feminine figures laying on either side of his naked body.
He was inside what appeared to be a traveling Whore’s-Bedroom-Within-a-Stagecoach.
The women were impressively striking – dark-skinned Nubian Zulu warrior Princesses. 6 ft. 2 inches tall, Long muscular thick bodies, with well-fleshed-out Asses and Thig... Continue»
Posted by markfayer 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Huh?

This is a pure creative Imaginery story... Unfortunetly it dosnt fit in to the catergys except maby first time???

It all started one stormy evening, lightning howling mingled with thunder crashing like a cocanophy from hell. Walking in the driving rain Jane wonderd why the hell she decided to walk to the cinema instead of catching the bus that descision led to 1 of the best experinces of her young life.

At 25 she had just risen to the top in the emotionly and hormonuly charged atmosphere of Stock Trading, of course being blond didnt help matters much but what did was two fold. One the cu... Continue»
Posted by Dopefiend 6 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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What Attracts Women

According to some studies, 3 out of 10 men are can attest that they really understand women.

The remaining 7, you ask? They are out in the haystack finding needles. This means that almost 70% of the men population in the U.S. contends that whatever they do, they still could not figure out how to understand women.

For this reason, men are having a hard time to figure out what attract women sexually and romantically in a relationship. 6 out of ten men attest that women are so unpredictable that what they thought women are attracted to, they suddenly realize in the end that it is not the ri... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Theatrical..... 13

Theatrical…….13

Julia ran into the toilet, her tits bobbing as she went, he got off the bed and followed her, I heard the shower start, “that’s it my darling” I thought, “get it all nice and sparkling for me” he came out drying himself but the shower was still going and I sensed that Julia had first of all used the bidet and then had gone into the shower, his cock wagged as he dried himself,
I smiled to myself, this was the aftermath of a nice fuck, he was dressed by the time she came out and he fastened her bra for her as she stood in front of him, then to my disappointment, he turned an... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo, Voyeur  |  
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Sailing, Sun and Sex - Part 2

As we approach Spartakhori we prepare 'Adios' for arrival. I start the engine, we furl the sails, put the fenders out and secure the stern lines.

"OK Suzy?" I ask.

"Yes OK but a little apprehensive about meeting your friends."

I smile. "No problems my sweet. they really are lovely people. So relax, you'll be fine."

Our age difference, 15 years, bothers her a little when first meeting any of my friends, but to date they have all taken to her instantly.

Swinging into the bay we swing around, go astern onto the quay and with the help of my friends, Rick and Jenny we're soon secu... Continue»
Posted by markd40 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Brief sex 008 In the cemetery at night

Brief sex 008


In the cemetery at night.



Ah the summer holidays when we were young, what memorable moments. This is the time when one awakens to love. In fact we think of nothing but ass girls much more than studying. That was my case, I sought every means to draw any passing petticoat. I must say that in my youth I feel that the fair were less shy. I think I've lived in good years.

I had just turned 17, but other times other manners at that age I was going on vacation with my parents. Oh it was not a hassle but they had too much on the back sometimes. That year we went to m... Continue»
Posted by CinquantNERF 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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on the hill

An older bull standing on top of the hill over looking the herd, see the young bull running up the hill. The young one say hey old timer 'hows it going"? The old bull does not reply but snorts. The young one says to the old bull " hey lets run down the hill and fuck us a few heffers". The old bull looks at the young one with a smile and says " why dont we walk down the hill and fuck them all".... Continue»
Posted by prettygirl 6 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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In the Beginning

I read a book by Nick Hornby called "High Fidelity". A friend of mine suggested it to me as he thought that I would like the music that was mentioned in the book. The main character of the book tells about the development (if one could call it that....) of his music appreciation as it related to his advances and rejections on the social front. He started when he was a teenager and the book progresses to age 35 or so. It made me think and remember.....

I finally figured out why I am so obsessed with sex. I started too young! Reading the book "High Fidelity" made me think about all those won... Continue»
Posted by bbbooom 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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my butch hancock story:) kinda filthy but saving

lol when i first lost my virginity it was so cool. my cousin and b*o set it up all for me. it was one night in oshkosh wisconsin i went up to my cousin apartment and we were all chillin smoking and drinking and it was this thick redbone from millwakue wisconsin- boi was she thick. anyway everybody leave the room and we're talking.
She say, "let's see what you tawking about" and im like, "aight" so she say, "let's go in the room" and im like, "ight" so knwing us we go in the room and start kissing. im tipsy off the Amsterdam and her tongue all on my mine while were kissing and shit. lol ... Continue»
Posted by brickholder23 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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"I think I can..." And I did Pt. 4

The test were negeative, My scans were normal. Nothing explained what happened to me and honestly I felt just fine. Cassie hailed a cab for me and slid inside. On the ride home, Checking my missed calls and various texts, I remember what got me and Cassie together in the first place. My thoughts. I didnt wanna push it, maybe it was the reason I was here, or maybe I was just being a pansy. So I once again set my thoughts on the curvaceous woman next to me and thought about her touching me. Lo and behold she did just that. Next I thought to the driver that the ride was free. As we pulled up to m... Continue»
Posted by dbam69 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Vampire's Slave pt 2

The venture


The previous night, after shooting a copious load of cum down the gorgeous vampire's throat, Danny had agreed to drive Sylvia across the country to meet with her b*****r and s****r. Well not her actual b*****r and s****r, but the three vampires had all been turned into bl**dsuckers by the same elder vampire and apparently in their world that meant they were f****y.

That morning at 5am, well before the sun was up, Danny and Sylvia hit the road.

Sylvia's car turned out to be a very nice black limousine, not the most subtle vehicle, but it had specially darkened windows and... Continue»
Posted by engineerx1980 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Coffee and Cream

The wind was blowing in through the open window in the bedroom, it was cool and crisp and I heard the birds off in the distance calling to mates to start the day. The breeze slightly brushed my shear black night shirt making my nipples erect with pleasure. I could feel the wanting building up, it was one of those mornings when pleasure overtook my mind....
I reached beside me and felt his warm body, I could feel him lightly breathing as he slept. Quietly I slipped off my panties and curled behind him feeling his tight ass. He stirred a bit and I ran my hand down his warm thighs and around to ... Continue»
Posted by sinnfullll 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The day I died.

It was quite balmy when I left the office, there was a slight breeze cooling as it blew up my bare legs and through between the buttons of my summer frock. I crossed of the path and away from the traffic to walk home through the woods. I had played here as a c***d, running with my friends, climbing trees and skinny dipping in the pool when I was so young it didn't matter.
Probably because of my familiarity with the place I didn't worry about being on my own in such a secluded place, I was just enjoying the sun on my back and the breeze on my legs. The cooling breeze brought out goos... Continue»
Posted by celcus 6 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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From Sub to Dom: My “Cthulhu” risen.

For those that have seen our videos, you will now Kutwijf is a perfect Asian Fuck Toy. 160 cm and 55Kg, open minded, submissive and devoted to her husband. But things had become a bit boring; she would fuck on demand, kitchen, bed, even in public, but after 10 minutes and a few positions, she would tell me to hurry up.

Most times I would just wank and get it over with. Other times I would wank several times per day and not be able to cum. Then there were the late night porn sessions into the early hours while she was lying next to me. In all honesty I was addicted to porn and it was beginn... Continue»
Posted by kutwijf 5 months ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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New Life Part 2

Part 2

Linda felt as if she were weightless as her super strongman, pulled her into the shower and lifted her up and up until she was level with his attractive and fully featured face.
"I love you," she gasped, as he said nothing in return and took her bottom lip into her mouth. As he began to suck and indulge himself in her full shapely lips, she found herself wrapping her legs around him tightly and to the point to where he let out a slight grunt. Her legs were strong from years of gymnastics, but the pressure around his waist was welcomed only caused his massive meat to gain even more ... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 5 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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