Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 107

The old buck. The real story.

My dad is one of the richest men in Russia, so called tycoon.
We live in a big mansion near a small Ural town.
Dad has joint business with Dmitry Vasilyevich, 62 years old bald fat man with a big belly and large height.
He has a wife and three c***dren.
His youngest daughter Olesya is of my age. She hates me because of some trifles.
Dmitry Vasilyevich often visits our house because of the business.
I am not afraid to be immodest, but I should say that I am a very attractive sexy blonde girl with large blue eyes, thin waist and pretty big breasts. My legs are long and beautiful too, and o... Continue»
Posted by Natasha98 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Types of Sex between a Couple

In order to fully enjoy these practices, you must ensure you understand all of the potential ramifications prior to engaging in them.

Three is not a crowd

It is a common dream which in today’s time and age has the potential to be oh-so real. It involves you, your partner, and another person. Most people enter it to experience a new form of sex as they are bored of the ‘vanilla’ sex they have with their partner. However, the best would be if all three of you are reasonably well known to each other and comfortable enough to enjoy a sexual act.

Advantage: You have the chance to spice up ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Wet Hard Kiss

Oh bl**dy hell she thought as the bus pulled away...I hate living in the fucking country! Now I’ve got half an hour to wait until the next one and......Fuck it! It’s starting to rain....

She’d been out with her mates and though she’d enjoyed it, it was sitting in a freezing,wet bus shelter that made her wonder if she’d not have been better staying in tonight.....Ah well.

It happened so quickly that she barely had time to panic.A young man with hood over head came galloping through the rain and almost knocked her down as he crashed into the shelter.

He threw back his hood and shook dr... Continue»
Posted by fmac 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Dirty Dawg: Confessions of an Irredeemable BASTERD



Chapter 1: The Indian Intern


I had been working this shit job at a downtown law firm for quite some time had been considering quitting due to a wealth of “Busy Work” and my asshole of a supervisor Mr. Kumar. He was this Indian fuck who had started out six months ago in a satellite firm overseas and transferred into a management position. He was a big fan of cramming as much shit into an eight hour work period as humanly possible. He would watch ... Continue»
Posted by mondotoken 2 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Tight Huh?

A man picks up a hooker and tells her that he wants to see a sample of what he might get before he spends his hard earned money. The slut, feeling very confident spreads her legs and says, "Put your hand all the way in," which the man does.

Impressed, the man is ready to plunk down the cash when she says, "Put your other hand all the way in too." Once both his hands are all the way in she says, "Now spread your hands apart." As the man attempts to spread his hands apart she says proudly, "Tight Huh?"... Continue»
Posted by berndog24 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Flying High! - Short Story

Mona Lindley, 29, single, international sales manager, travels a lot. She doesn't like men too much, despises kissing, is disgusted by touching dicks and hates warm sperm trickling down her thighs. But she uses men for her sexual satisfaction, and should there be none around her at the moment, she endulges always in her own erotic fantasies!

The golden sun sinks tired into the soft bed of clouds and the veil of the night draws over it to keep him warm. The contant vibration and the numbing hum of the heavy jet engines are lulling my senses. I made a bit of small talk with the guy next to ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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THE SEX LIFE OF AN ELECTRON

One night when his charge was pretty high, Micro-Farad decided to find a cute little coil to saturate. He picked up Milli-Amp and took her for a ride on his megacycle. They rode over Wheatstone bridge, around the sine waves, and stopped by a flowing current.
They walked over to Magnetic field and sat down. Micro-Farad, attracted by Milli-amp’s characteristic curves, soon had her resistance at a minimum, and her field fully excited. He laid her on the ground potential, raised her frequency, lowering her resistance still more, and then hr pulled out his hi-voltage probe. He inserted it in... Continue»
Posted by fred269 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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the office

I'm walking over to the kitchen when I hear Lisa call "Selfish!" in that half mocking tone she loves so much. She looks at my mug and gestures to me with her own. "Ah, shit, sorry Lisa, tea or coffee?" I reply, with a melodramatic bow. It's a running joke we have, me being her skivvy. I've been working for her on this project for over six months now. You couldn't want much more from a boss, she knows her stuff but doesn't lord it over us. Keeps the teams happy, backs us up when it counts but isn't afraid to tell you when you're talking shit. Combined with that she's gorgeous, so as far as I'm... Continue»
Posted by EASTWOODY 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Who'd be in your ideal movie? Please read!

I'd love to see a lesbian film featuring Roxanne Pallet from Emmerdale and Helen Flanagan from Coronation Street. To those of you reading this who don't know who they are, just google their names, and I'm sure you'll agree with me. Just imagine the 2 of them dressed in school uniforms eating each other out. Fucking amazing!
Now, as stunning as they may be, they are basically "normal" girls. It would be easy to say that you'd love to see Beyonce having her clit licked by Rihanna...(there's a thought!) Come on, boys and girls. I really want to hear who yo... Continue»
Posted by mrharvey 5 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The Business of Pleasure


Excuse me Miss, Is this your shop???"

er, yes, Yes it is, can I help. Pip looked over at the man at the shop
entrance tall, stocky, suited & booted. He was carrying a clipboard and
looked official.

"Can I see your shop agreement & confirmation of business forms, please"
He spoke politely but firmly.
"Have you just opened??"

Yes. Pip replied

"and how long has that been...." a stern look

just a week now.....

"The forms then please, I have no notification that you have right to be open
or to sell or serve customers!" a Very stern look now on his face

Oh, er... Continue»
Posted by verystickyfingers 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Locked Inside

Locked inside the Playboy Mansion and no way out...every guy should have this problem...

Locked Inside.

As the eighties wore on my friend Rich's telephone business began to prosper. I stayed along for the ride and eventually became his partner. I had gone back to school nights at Rutgers to complete my degree in electrical engineering. After a while I suggested to Rich that we expand our core business to include sophisticated alarm systems. There was a growing need for more and better security systems and we had the know how to service that need. Installing and maintaining ... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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When its the Car, its different!

Disclaimer: All the names of characters in this story are fictitious but the story is not, this is because my name is rather unique and Google is fucking powerful after having read numerous stories on ISS and I really felt like it was time for me to put up my tale of pleasure ride. This is my story of how in search just a companion I became a part of something so intense and amazing that me and my partner cherish it for life.

Today and I am going to tell you a story o what happened between me and Vineeta and my second girlfriend. Do send me your feedback at rahilseth9@gmail.com my name is ... Continue»
Posted by rahils9 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Some things I 'Do' Like

Cum drops on noses and stories well written
Sensual kisses will have me quite smitten
Hard bulging packages, fun with no strings
These are a few of my favourite things

Creamy filled pussies and tongues in my anus
Light hearted spanking as long as it's painless
Fun with my toy and the joy that it brings
These are a few of my favourite things

Girls in tight dresses with sexy eye lashes
But NO fakes or skinny rakes or vulgar pumped gashes
Beds with 4 posters and reinf***ed springs
These are a few of my favourite things

Concealed love bites......
Sexy playfights....
When I'm f... Continue»
Posted by oh_so_horny 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Italian Job 8

The Italian Job 8
The second part of this tale involves the interpreter “I know, I know” I can hear you all saying “Oh not another fucking interpreter” but hear me out and draw your own conclusions after.
Mrs Chikolova was supposed to be our interpreter for the duration of the job but it turned out that she could hardly speak any English although she could read it but no one else could speak any English so no one knew she couldn’t, to look at her you would have thought she was a middle aged spinster but she was indeed married, she was in the habit of wearing dark blue dresses that had small ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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RAW: The Sex Magicians

Part 1 1

AT THE ORGASM RESEARCH FOUNDATION Dr. Roger Prong, who was known by some foundation employees as "a bl**dy Peeping Tom" and a "horny old voyeur" was in fact very scientific, or so he always insisted as he watched the girls having orgasms.

At the laboratory, Josie Welch, already nude but with a single sheet demurely spread over her full and obviously glorious body, looked unhappy as Roger entered.

"They tell me there won't be any men today,"

she said as soon as she saw the doctor.

"That's right, my dear," he said with professional unction. "That part of your testing i... Continue»
Posted by Johnnytames69 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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If I Had One of Those

If I had one of those I’d play with it all the time. I’d tease it and I’d pamper it. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for it. I’d use it every way I could think of. It’d be VERY MUCH worth it…
I’d show it off. “Hey, look what I’ve got!” I’d use it to tease all the boys. I’d wear really short skirts and the highest high heels, and I’d swing my hips just so, as only a real woman can. I’d spend a lot of time sitting in places where the boys walked by. I might even whistle at them! I’d be such a slut! When a really cute guy walked by I’d smile at him and open my legs to let him see ... Continue»
Posted by Volfy 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Dead Rosed

I haven't been able to sl**p lately. I started a new shift at work, and it seems like the world is always asl**p, while I'm awake at crazy hours,

working hard to afford the life I want us to live. I never wanted her to feel like I didn't care about her needs, because I do. I guess I just have trouble

exspressing how I feel sometimes. But i do it all for her. I do it all for us. She says I don't try hard enough to make time for her. She says that I

concern myself too much with money, and the things I think we "need". But I'm just trying to provide. I heard her talking in her sl**p ... Continue»
Posted by javabot9000 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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some where over the rainbow

It started just like every other day, nice and warm, sun was shinning, wind softly blowing threw the windows, another beautiful day was starting. I had already packed the lunch we were going to have, and tea's were packed as well, you hear me humming in the kitchen, and you sneak up behind me and wrap your arms around me, and kiss my neck, i spin around and smile and softly slap you and tell you that you scared the hell out of me, but i love you anyway, you look around and see everything is packed up, you smile and ask if i packed the bread as well, i open the basket, and there it was right n... Continue»
Posted by tonyandkat 10 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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crackwhoreblues -42%

Transmission # 97
Standing at the edge of the cliff, gazing thoughtlessly down into the septic tank of our soul... High heels and lip-stick, cocaine enemas, we beg the Whore-Goddess to fuck us with her fifteen inch throbbing cock, to be her slave....

Bouncing up and down, playing pogo on your cock, tightening my sphincter, milking, teasing, squeezing your throbbing shaft so deep inside. You pull my legs back, speeding my asshole, gape-r****g me, making me scream as I lose control over my body, spasming anal-orgasmic ecstasy. Face fuck me, electrocute me, your trannytweakerfuckslutslave... Continue»
Posted by cassielie 2 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Theatrical.....17

Theatrical…..17

We went into the theatre and into the bar, I saw him almost immediately, he was standing talking to another man, the guy must have been in his late fifties, he nodded but made no move, he had a drink in his hand, Julia saw him and started to move towards him,
I caught her arm, “wait” I said, “why, he’s over there” she said, “I know and he has seen us so when he is ready he will either speak to us here or in the theatre” I said, “but why don’t we just go over and talk to him” she said, “because sweetheart, his wife died about 6 months ago and if that man is a friend of his ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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