Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 102

Dirty Tales From the Past

I enjoy when my wife talks to me about her previous experiences while we're fucking. I suspected she had an active past before she met me, but until I got her to open up, I had no idea! She tells the stories to me while she blows me or fucks me, and she tells them with many details. I lay back, listen, and feel her work me. It's almost like I was there with her when they happened.

Here's one of her many tales:

Her first black man was when she turned eighteen, just after her birthday. He was in his late 20's. She volunteered as a candy striper in a local hospital. He was an orderly. Whil... Continue»
Posted by jnc_1987 7 months ago  |  Categories: , Sex Humor, Shemales  |  Views: 237

New Life Part 3

Part 3
"are you just about ready dear?" Linda inquired as she put the last of her face on.
"I am, sweet heart, we'd better get going or we're going to be late," Braxton retorted as he cinched his tie into place and gave it the usual wiggle to make sure we wasn't going to choke. "Alright sweetie, going to get the car, I'll be waiting for you out front." yes sir, she smirked as he fled out of the door.
She then grabbed her hand bag and made her way out of the front door, where her car and super handsome driver awaited. However just as she was about to open the door, Braxton in a flash had ... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 235  |  
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1 nite passion

me being da dj n at my party was djing most the night sow these sexy lokkin chicks evrywere but this 1 she looked at my eyes gave me da fck me look looking up n down at me sorta thing like anyways im drimnking smoking having a gd time then this gawjus looking gal comes upto me and ses if u do a shot of tiquila i will get off with u so i sed y not then thois gawjus gal starts sexy kissin me on the couch wee cant stop kissing she grabs my hand takes me to my room so we doing the sexykissin n she puts me straight agenst da wall she den kisses down my chest unbuttoning my zib she then puts her ... Continue»
Posted by bigben69er 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 234  |  
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The death of me on the sunset strip by Romance666

a short story by Romance666
coming in from the hot dusty weather, Jamie lifted the canteen over her head water poured over her long black loosely curled hair making it cling to her rock hard body underneath her army green wife beater and gun belt hanging from her shoulder. Zombie brains washed down to the floor and floated down the stream on the concrete. What's for dinner bitch? she jokingly says to Lucy, Lucy had stayed home to cook a dead dog they found on the street on a scavenger hunting mission they did earlier, Jamie had brought back a box of baby wipes and pine sol. not really a larg... Continue»
Posted by Romance666 2 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 233  |  
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my first

Srinu mera naam, meri middle class f****y me mom, dad, didi sindhu
aur choti behan priyaanka(priya) ek chote se ghar me rehte the. Mom
dad dono employers the didi ki marriage ho gayi thi, priya school ke
final exam likh chuki hi. Mai ghar ke paas hi apni degree kar raha
hun, lekin kahaani sirf meri choti behan priya ki hi.
Priya ko nursery se aaj tak residencial school me hi padhaaya gaya
tha, isi kaaran sab use bohut laad karte the, f****y se door rehne se
use ghar ki tameej maloom nahi thi aur wo itni jiddi thi ki uski baat
ke saamne kuch nahi chalta tha, jitni jiddi thi utni sundar ... Continue»
Posted by akashcoool8 7 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 233

Stitching Frankengirl Together: a Halloween Treat

Halloween is my favorite holiday. It combines candy, monsters, horror movies, ancient pagan rituals, booze, partying all night, fake bl**d, and hot girls in sexy costumes. On top of everything else, Halloween, a night given over to fun, fantasy, and revelry, is by far the sexiest holiday of them all (shove off Valentine's Day).

I always use October as a chance to revisit my favorite monster movies, the glorious black and white classics like Dracula, The Wolfman, The Mummy, and my favorites, Frankenstein and the even better Bride of Frankenstein. Now, Doctor Frankenstein had a bright idea, ... Continue»
Posted by Regrets 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 233  |  
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£14.00

I am way to scared to go dogging and can be a bit shy to go to gay venues but I have needs and as a sub bottom I really do need to be comprehensively shagged; the more often the better.

Some time ago I went to a 'north' London sauna once and when I walked in the door the fellow at the counter asked me if I realised it was a Gay sauna. I am a very straight looking guy and if you thought I was gay you may say a very dominant top, but the truth lies elsewhere.

I told the young fellow that I realised what the establishment provided and after the payment of the obligatory £14 I went in.

I... Continue»
Posted by AussieJonno 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 231  |  
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Only the British would get this one!..............



Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a Double Decker.

It was just After Eight.

They got off at Quality Street .

He asked her name. 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said with a Wispa.

'I'm Marathon , the one with the nuts' he replied.

He touched her Cream Eggs, which was a Kinder Surprise for her.

Then he slipped his hand into her Snickers, which made her Ripple.

He fondled her Jelly Babies and she rubbed his Tic Tacs.

Soon they were Heart Throbs.

It was a Fab moment as she screamed in Turkish Delight.

But, 3 days later, his Sherbet Dip Dab started to itch.
... Continue»
Posted by papa61 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 230  |  
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There's alot to be said for experience!

Two posts in a week… Maybe I’ve rediscovered my muse!?!? Though more likely is a certain ‘reader’ chastising me for being so lapse lol, either way I think I should blog about our most recent ‘visitor’.







For reasons that are not all that cryptic, I will call this one ‘nipples’ (both to protect his identity and as a good mental reminder for me). We met, as many of my conquests do, on an adult social networking site.







Very laid back, not at all pushy, easy going, genuine bloke, who seemed to grasp the whole concept of NSA fun, he has at least 10 years on me but... Continue»
Posted by unassumingmistress 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 230  |  
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Terrible Headaches..!!!

Two old guys were sitting in the park, talking, when the subject
turned to getting older. The first guy said "Women have all the luck
when it comes to getting older."
"What do you mean?" asked the second guy.
"Well," replied the first. "I can barely remember the last time I got
aroused in bed, but my wife is healthier than ever!"
"Healthier? How is that?" his buddy wondered.
"Years ago, when we were younger, almost every night before bed she'd
get these terrible headaches." he answered. "Now that we're older, she
hasn't had a headache in years."

... Continue»
Posted by papa61 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 229  |  
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Invitation to a Beach, Chapter 9

Chapter 9.

We rested awhile, lying in the soft grass under a warm spring sun. It was my idea of a perfect place to fuck. I imagined how going to this place as a teen would have made me grow up a very different person.

Soon, we started the walk back toward camp. We stopped several times, and Max pointed out some of the interesting flowers and trees around us. At one stop, Max turned to face the side of the trail and started to pee into a bush. He held his cock casually in one hand and just let it flow.

“I wish I could do that,” I commented. I really had to pee. “I shoulda gone before w... Continue»
Posted by ellenbeachbabe 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 229  |  
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A goth´s good time

All my stories are true

2010, August 31
About 9:25 pm

This story is a rough prologue to
A dominate goth
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/41234.html
and
Vengeance is sweet
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/55130.html

As always you can find the animated pictures in my profile

Despite is was the last day of august the temperatures once again shot up. I don't know the exact temperatures by today, but it was so hot that every sunbeam hurts. Therefore I was extremely eased it already had cooled down a bit due to the daytime. The sun already had sunk and a brisk wind blew. Fr... Continue»
Posted by Bea69 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 229  |  
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Top Clues that your Woman Is Cheating On You

Short of walking in on your wife or girlfriend doing unspeakable things with another dude, there's no foolproof way to know if she's cheating on you. But there are clues — thing is, you probably don't notice any of them.

But we know two guys who do — in fact, it's their job. Between them, Christopher Paoletti, president of Infidelity Investigations LLC, and Tony DeLorenzo, co-author of The 28 Tell-Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse, they have about 45 years of experience hunting down cheaters. So we asked them to tell us what sort of behavior is a tip of that a woman might be cheating on you.
... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 228  |  
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Smurfette's Absolution part2

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that were created by someone else

Claimer: Go to my profile to view my characters

I didn't went outside for anything for the entire day, I stayed indoors and shut myself awayfrom the outside world. I was so hurt that I couldn't thinkstraight, I couldn't listen, nor do I wanna speakto anybody. It felt like the worldhad ended for me and my life is over. Luckily Rachael stayed by my side during the entire day, she only leaves if she needs to use the bathroom, or take me tothe bathroom.

Papa Smurf finally found out about what happenedand stopped by ... Continue»
Posted by wsgy411 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 227  |  
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Rinku - The Party



Mohit’s (my husband) eyes almost popped out of their sockets as I stepped out from the bedroom.
I was wearing a white bikini top blouse & a shimmering silvery transparent sari which I had worn as low as possible. I had tied up my silky brown hair in a loose top knot leaving my fair smooth back bare naked except for the thin white string which held in place the two small patches of white fabric on my boobs.
He glared at me without a word.
“What’s wrong darling?” I s
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 3 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 227

Muddin

Kent held his book in one hand and sc****d dirt off the side of his sneaker with a stick he held in the other. Deciding to read his assigned chapter on a bench in front of the English building on the nicest day of the year was a big mistake, Kent thought. Waaaaaaaaaaay too easy to get distracted out here.

A deep purr caught Kent’s ear and grew louder as an old pick-up truck rounded the corner and slid into one of the student parking spaces. Dried mud was splattered across the entire truck like it was a mobile Jackson Pollack canvas. Kent trained his eye on the vehicle as the driver’s door ... Continue»
Posted by coedwrestle 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 226  |  
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After I Die I Want to Come Back as a Lesbian - May

After I Die I Want to Come Back as A Lesbian - Maybe

I love pussy! It's my favorite food! I don't just LOVE pussy; I ADORE it! I even love the WORD "pussy!" I love to look at it; I love to think about it; I love to touch it and to feel it and to kiss it and lick it and rub my nose in it. Anyone who has one is my kind of person! This is why I once had the thought that after I die I would LOVE to come back in my next life as a lesbian!

Lesbians seem to have SOOOOO much fun with each other. They can do most of the things that guys can do for them, and they can do them BETTER because... Continue»
Posted by George178 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 224  |  
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Airplane

"D-234 is on line, we approching to destination. End over".
"Your stewardess are so wet, please my honey fuck me, forget this airplane".
"What aboat the people inside?"
"Let them and fuck me pilot".
"Hmmm your is on me know, what a fealing hmmm".
"I will show you that I have a monster for you".
"Yes tell me that thing, I become so wet". "Here is my tits hmmm".
"Yes nice tits hmmm".
"Let`s finished that I can`t stand it so long".
"Here is ohhhhhh".
"Nice fuck my pilot". "But there is a one thing".
"What?"
"Your destination is too far away, you missed that".
"Ooo crap look what you... Continue»
Posted by jopaoux 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
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Theatrical....2

Theatrical … 2

You remember at the end of “Theatrical” how I told you that I had not seen the guy from the theatre since he fucked me in the disabled toilets and how much he meant to me, how I had been looking out for him, well!! I’ve seen him again,…… yes!!, in the city with his wife, I was walking through one of the arcades and I spotted him in front, he is really easy to notice because he is so tall, well my heart stopped when I realised it was him but then I thought “how can I make him see me, maybe he has been looking for me, I have got to make him see me, make eye contact” so I turned... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
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Perfect girlfriend has a big sex drive!

Apart from this, the perfect girlfriend is a career-minded woman who earns more than their partner but at the same time wants to stay at home and bring up the c***dren.

The clue to these seemingly contradictory demands lies in the men polled, 3,000 bachelors.

Near the top of their girlfriend checklist is the requirement that she should have a "pert bottom" – which may explain why they are still single.

And while three-quarters of the men polled said their ideal woman would keep her weight in check, 89 per cent also wanted her to tuck into a big meal without worrying. These perfect ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 222  |  
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