Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 101
In order to fully enjoy these practices, you must ensure you understand all of the potential ramifications prior to engaging in them.
Three is not a crowd
It is a common dream which in today’s time and age has the potential to be oh-so real. It involves you, your partner, and another person. Most people enter it to experience a new form of sex as they are bored of the ‘vanilla’ sex they have with their partner. However, the best would be if all three of you are reasonably well known to each other and comfortable enough to enjoy a sexual act.
Advantage: You have the chance to spice up ... Continue»
You: kool so u two r wet?? hahaha jk;)
Stranger: and horny
You: haha really?
You: u guys wanna blow me??
Stranger: come here
Stranger: you won'y reagret it
You: comes to u
Stranger: ok we ll waitn to u darlig <3
You: what kinda panties u got on
Stranger: white small panties
Stranger: and no bra
You: mmmm u got big tits\
Stranger: like texas !!!!
Stranger: what u wanna do with them ?:>
You: play with them
Stranger: ... Continue»
The Booty Inspector pt. 3 by markfayer
“Freaky Felatio Foursome”
Dick and his intrepid Lieutenant, junior, had no sooner arrived at the Barnaby’s Circus Fairgrounds when they spied the performers’ ring of campers set about in a cozy circle, creating a small common open space for the freaks and Acrobats and other members of the Freak Parade.
“Alright, Dick, what’s our plan of Attack?” quipped Junior.
“Well…I figgur we just waltz into the Boxler b*o’s trailer, give them an offer they caint refuse—by which I mean they get to fornicate with our Nubian Amazons-in-tow in a no... Continue»
The Italian Job 17
A few days later Ellie came to see me at my apartment, this was truly a royal visit as she had never been before and I got the feeling that she was checking to see if I had got anyone entrenched that she might see as a threat to her private domain, she wandered around, looking at all of my stuff, “Maria came to see me” she commented whilst browsing my books,
I made no comment, I reckoned if she wanted to tell me she would “wanted to know if she could have her job back” she said, now I was curious but determined to hold out so still no comment “how do you feel about that?”... Continue»
Fucked 2 - The Great Rock N Roll Orgy [part 2 of 2]
By: Jo Jo (email@example.com)
Fucked 2 - The Greatest Rock N Roll ORGY of all Time
Well... bestest one I have ever been to anyway.
This follows on from Fucked, and concerns the party that followed the
dissolution of that band.
It was held in a very impressive apartment overlooking the canal system
in the centre of Birmingham. It was above some sort of gym/spa and took
up the entire floor.
The band, as I mentioned before , was Mike , Paul, Niecey , Julie, Ray
and of course Derek.
Also at the bash, 4 or 5 te... Continue»
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs less.... Continue»
If you want a repeat performance from your lady friend, it might be a good idea to tap into your sensitive side and step your cuddle game up. Psychologist Susan Hughes said:
“Females placed an overall great importance than did males on all five items measured: intimate talking, kissing, cuddling and caressing, professing their love for their partner and talking about the relationship after sex. In contrast, men placed more importance on gaining extrinsic rewards after sex.”
And these extrinsic rewards include cigarettes, booze, etc.
So what is to be gained from this study (that survey... Continue»
REASONS WHY YOU MUST GET TOGETHER WITH A HORSE RIDERS
1) We have four speeds and can be many different positions ...
2) We have on our tight pants
3) We like getting dirty
4) We know how to ride really
5) We always do our best in the drawing
6) We love having control
7) We can ride for hours
8) We know how to deal with big things
9) We are going off and on easily
10) We are always ready
11) We like it hard
12) We have leg and back muscles that help us manage all the different positions
13) We love using whips
14) legs apart is our natural position
15) We do... Continue»
On the first day of Christmas, my true slut gave to me
A virgin so very horny
On the second day, she gave me two pecker rubs
And a virgin so very horny
Now on the third day of Christmas, that ol' bitch, she brought home three French whores
Two pecker rubs
And a virgin so very horny
Now on the fourth day of Christmas, four calling girls
Three French whores
Two pecker rubs
And a virgin so very horny
On the fifth day of Christmas she brought me home somethin' special
She brought me home somethin' special
Five herpie seeds
Four calling girls
Three French whores
Two peck... Continue»
My quest to find the Queen of Sex Fantasy Land in search of the ultimate sexual experience...
I am so ashamed. I am just so ashamed of myself, you have no idea. I have been so bad I should be punished by one or two of you fine looking women. Really, I have been a bad boy. I have let you people down big time. Oh yes, I really did it this time. Here I am on an adult web site and what do I write? c***dish nonsense about lost tribes of wild women, going back to the Garden Of Eden, girls tied to fences. Utter nonsense. Here you people are out there, expecting some hot... Continue»
In 2003 I was freshly out of school, temporarily unemployed, in a depressing and unhealthy long-distance on-off relationship of the sort that young people who don't know what they want often find themselves in and, further, was newly and angrily "off". I went to a bar with some friends to blow off some steam and got a few drinks down the hatch in short order. There was a new girl working as a table waitress and, while nothing special to look at, she was curvy, showing a lot of strong-looking leg and had a cute smile. We flirted a bit every time I placed an order and I eventually asked what she... Continue»
So that, dear friends, is why the President and I both hope that you will support him as he tries to pass the all important spending cap legislation now before the House, thank you for your time, good night." Jennifer Boyle, the wife of the president, made her way through the clapping throng on her way to the rear exit of the grand ball room in the Century Towers Hotel. A limo with a phalanx of Secret Service agents were waiting to e****t her back to the White House, while she and her body agent, Jimmy Knox and his assistant Bill Dooley all climbed onto the service elevator for the twenty f... Continue»
Επιλογή γλώσσας ▼
18,703 strangers online
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Question to discuss:
How many penises does your ideal mate own?
You: i cant really get that
You: i ll say 20
Stranger: too little
You: i am raising my bid to 70
You: oh i cant beat that u win
You: 150 1
You: 150 2
You: 150 3
You: the ideal mate goes to stranger 2
Stranger: *feels proud*
Stranger: in your face sucker I won
You: i lost
Stranger: now what wil... Continue»
The scene is a one-room schoolhouse, somewhere out West.
The teacher is about my age, thirty-five, or even older. But she is
a virgin, a frustrated old maid. She has kept one of the pupils
after school, a strong, six-foot-tall boy who isn’t too bright. She
goes through a stern lecture with him about how he’s not been
paying attention during class, etc. She asks him two or three
tough questions, and when he can’t answer says she’s going to
have to punish him. She tells him to take down his pants; he’s
embarrassed but ... Continue»
January 30. 2012
This is my first Journal entry. Why do people write a journal? Probably because they’re lonely. But I, the great Takuri, or at least that’s what I’m calling myself these days, am never lonely. No I’m writing this journal so that other people can see, can read what great things I’ve done and where I’ve erred. It feels like I’m writing the truth. As a magician I spent my whole life living in illusions, bending the truth both to the audience but also to my humble self, now it feels like I can finally tell the whole story, you can’t go to somebody who you are manipulating and tel... Continue»
We start out at this beautiful italian restaurant called Angelinas... small place with a relaxing atmosphere. Perfect for two... siping wine at a candle lit diner we barely eat due to the scintillating conversation.... I ask if ur ready to continue the night to which u agree and we stroll down to the car and make our way back.
The ride is a little awkward at first due to the fact we both have an idea whats to come... so I crack a lame joke to break the tension and entertaining conversation resumes..
We pull up to the house and I ask if ud like company for the night.. please u s... Continue»
Such situations are definitely not uncommon. Many people who are in long-term relationships do encounter this phase. So why don't you plan some exotic surprises for your partner? Such that he's taken off guard and left asking for more.
Surprises need not necessarily be really pricey. What matters the most is your attitude, the way you show your concern and express your love towards your mate. Here are some innovative ideas...
Men love it when their ladylove makes an extra effort to seduce their senses. All you need to do is to think out of the box!
Sangeeta Ahlawat, a HR... Continue»
We knew it was not safe. At school, we loved being with each other, enjoying each other's company, cracking jokes and enjoying the time along with our studies. If we would get a chance, we would do some fondling and touching. The reason we couldn't take a chance again was because everyone had a doubt that we have crossed limits, and we didn't want to give our friends any chance of confirming their suspicion. Since we used to sit in the same horizontal row, even if the teacher was teaching, we were able to tease each other. Sometimes she would make some eye movements either pointing towards my ... Continue»
Not my Story...credit to unknown author
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters that were created by someone else
Claimer: Go to my profile to view my characters
The annoying pounding onmyfront door just as morning came around was enough to wake me from myslumber, I heardBabySmurf cry from the rude awakening. I scrambled out of bedand rushed to the front door, a bit steamed from the banging. When I openedit, I saw a smurf staring at me with lovestruck eyes, he heldupsome flowers that appear to be freshlypicked.
"Hi Smurfette," he said in a lovely tone, "Can we goout on a... Continue»
1. You have a lawnmower repair company on speed dial.
2. Double #1 if they offer 24 hour emergency service.
3. There is a sudden drop in the local sheep population and you can't seem to explain all the bl**dy wool in the house.
4. You go to the local dog park to get dates. And maybe meet some people, too.
5. Oil trucks make weekly deliveries to your home, even though you have gas heat.
6. Hardware store clerks know better than to ask "What sort of project is this for?"
7. You browse through small appliances looking for "inspiration."
8. You have a lifetime ban from dog sho... Continue»