Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 100

The Italian Job 12

The Italian job 12
The day had come for the party at Roseanna’s house, the plan was to drive there on the Friday afternoon, have the party all day Saturday & Saturday night then make our way home on the Sunday.
I went to Yvonne and Maria’s home on the Friday lunch time and collected them along with Sonia then we all drove to Ravenna to the party venue, Roseanna was waiting at the door with Hazel in the background, the ladies had the tour of the house and we were shown to our rooms, dinner was to be a 7.00pm, quite a lot of guests had arrived already and Yvonne and Sonia were already popular ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Coffee and Cream

The wind was blowing in through the open window in the bedroom, it was cool and crisp and I heard the birds off in the distance calling to mates to start the day. The breeze slightly brushed my shear black night shirt making my nipples erect with pleasure. I could feel the wanting building up, it was one of those mornings when pleasure overtook my mind....
I reached beside me and felt his warm body, I could feel him lightly breathing as he slept. Quietly I slipped off my panties and curled behind him feeling his tight ass. He stirred a bit and I ran my hand down his warm thighs and around to ... Continue»
Posted by sinnfullll 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Believe Nothing

“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” -Buddha

That quote by Buddha is one of my favorites, and I apply that reasoning to my life on a regular basis. Not believing in anything without deeply thinking about it has helped me form a much more rational view of the world than I ever would have if I had just listened to what other people “believe.” Or at least I believe that to be the case.

One of the things that I always find shocking is how many people just adopt a belief wi... Continue»
Posted by a_chord90 2 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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From the Casino to the Hotel

I was sitting at the bar in a casino when I noticed this babe near the other end of the curved bar whose face was exactly what my sexual fantasy was about. She looked at me and I smiled, and she smiled back. We smiled at each other again after a few minutes, and after a few more minutes, I decided to go sit in the empty chair next to her before someone else did. She looked like she was by herself. I sat down and introduced myself. She put her hand out to shake mine, but did not let go. We talked as best as we could over the loud music all the time running our fingers around in our hands.... Continue»
Posted by rawdney 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Hardcore  |  
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Shibari Fiction

I managed to shove the key into the lock of my apartment and pushed the door open with my head. You’d think working in the tech department would mean less late nights, but I’d been working until eleven or later at night for the past week. I hadn’t slept more to make up for it either, and since de-stressing through video games took a higher priority than sl**ping, I was about to crash and crash hard. After going to the bathroom and taking a hot shower to wake me up, I threw my old work clothes back on and headed for the kitchen.
“Nnnn… food. I need food.” I muttered to myself, rubbing my wet b... Continue»
Posted by blackeyedkitsune 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 12

Dear Dirty Diary,

My darling husband returned today after his five day, late September fishing trip to Schooner Lake. After thorough questioning it turned out he’d gotten a little apprehensive being all alone up there amongst the wailing loons and spirits of dead Algonquin Indians. He swears there’s some kind of energy around the fire pit on the island that spooks him. So he drove back down to the condo to visit the k**s. On the way down from Plevna, he went to a Saturday night concert at Peterborough and saw Lisa Brokop perform. I was so pissed, but when he pulled out a signed copy ... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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New Life Part 2

Part 2

Linda felt as if she were weightless as her super strongman, pulled her into the shower and lifted her up and up until she was level with his attractive and fully featured face.
"I love you," she gasped, as he said nothing in return and took her bottom lip into her mouth. As he began to suck and indulge himself in her full shapely lips, she found herself wrapping her legs around him tightly and to the point to where he let out a slight grunt. Her legs were strong from years of gymnastics, but the pressure around his waist was welcomed only caused his massive meat to gain even more ... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Sidewalk Catfight

It started with my temper versus some local trash a couple of nights ago and within moments I’d lost all decency and composure. I’d come out of my local bar alone although there were other people milling about on the street outside. As I walked down the pavement, a woman approached me and asked if I had any spare change. She looked rough in jeans and a hoodie top compared to my dress and coat which, despite my voluptuous and curvaceous figure, did suit me well. I merely apologised and said I had nothing and continued walking.
“Lying slag”, she shouted back. I turned around to look at her... Continue»
Posted by dodger125 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The fucking Cowboy - Short Story

Sue Miller, 26, a vetenerrian student in a country town, is still searching for the right relationship. She is well built and she knows that. But she still can't accept the fact that her body does attract men more than her sharp intellect. That's why she plays hard-to-get and therefor gets it hard! And that reflects clearly out of her sexual fantasies as you see:

I'm angry on my late way home. My new boyfriend kicked me out of his car after an argument. He said, that I was cold and selfish - that it was all my fault! The fucking prick! Men are all the same! I know how stubborn I am, and h... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Another trucker story from Tony503

Upon my 66 excursion after going into Missouri the Show Me State I met a young man in the truckstop in Joplin we were talking about all his travels and how he enjoyed meeting new truckers along his journeys but as yet he never encountered any like he read in his magazines
I said what kind of truckers is that You know the ones out here who enjoy Sex without commitments and who like a slave I started to laugh So You want to be a slave and treated to the stories you read in your magazines, Well he said I have always wanted to try something different I said come with me now first I have to ask ar... Continue»
Posted by MoonlightWonder 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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pool table adventure lol

well many yrs ago i always wanted to have gd hard sex on a pool or cnooker table................but i must admit not in a pub full of ppl lol...anyway i worked in a couple of pubs and so 1 nite aftr locking up and leaving the certains undrawn i ravished my boyfriend ovr the pool table gt him to bend me over and give it to me doggy style was amazing fun, then he flipped me on my back wiv my legs up open wide in the air whilst he slowly slid his hard cock into my tight pussy he took his time so he cud watch himself slide in and out of my pussy............anywayz as we carried on this sexy motion... Continue»
Posted by andetonya999 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Heathyr Hoffman ghost hunters lesbian love story

After being chosen as the winner of the SyFy channel reality show "ghost hunters academy" in 2009 and given a permanent role as a co-host on ghost hunters and then later ghost hunters international, Heathyr Hoffman couldn't possibly be happier with her life as a reality television celebrity.

Being on “Ghost Hunters International” was a blast. Heathyr Hoffman couldn’t imagine a better career than globe-trotting while looking for paranormal activity wherever it might occur. This enhanced a life-long love of history as well as her personal fascination with ghosts and other things that go bump ... Continue»
Posted by jesuitpriest 9 months ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The day I died.

It was quite balmy when I left the office, there was a slight breeze cooling as it blew up my bare legs and through between the buttons of my summer frock. I crossed of the path and away from the traffic to walk home through the woods. I had played here as a c***d, running with my friends, climbing trees and skinny dipping in the pool when I was so young it didn't matter.
Probably because of my familiarity with the place I didn't worry about being on my own in such a secluded place, I was just enjoying the sun on my back and the breeze on my legs. The cooling breeze brought out goos... Continue»
Posted by celcus 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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In the Beginning

I read a book by Nick Hornby called "High Fidelity". A friend of mine suggested it to me as he thought that I would like the music that was mentioned in the book. The main character of the book tells about the development (if one could call it that....) of his music appreciation as it related to his advances and rejections on the social front. He started when he was a teenager and the book progresses to age 35 or so. It made me think and remember.....

I finally figured out why I am so obsessed with sex. I started too young! Reading the book "High Fidelity" made me think about all those won... Continue»
Posted by bbbooom 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Joe & Murhy Part 1: Breaking and entering

The moon was full, bathing the bay and surrounding suburbs in a cerulean hue. The hot and humid air of the summer's night was still and silent, save for the crashing of the waves in the distance.

A careful eye would have spied the lanky silhouette of Joe scaling the wall effortlessly and dropping into the grounds without a sound. The moon illuminated the grounds of the house allowing Joe to scan the scene perfectly. The large manor house slouched no more than fifty yards away, the lower windows and doors boarded up. Boarded up but accessible, yes, always accessible.

The garden consist... Continue»
Posted by Bulletin 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Wonderfully Naughty Wizard of Oz (Ch5/P3)

As Leandra was enjoying herself on the guards cocks, Dorothy and Omby sat in their cell watching.

"Your friend is really ummmm...."

"Impressive", Dorothy said.

"No, I was going to say slutty", Omby replied back watching Leandra riding up and down Gotifri cock.

Dorothy laughed,"Yeah I would say that too". They watched as Leandra slowly stood up off Gotifri cock and walked to a pile of the guards clothes. She bent over showing the two guards her ass, but was reaching into the pockets trying to find the keys. It didn't take her long, knowing Zimo and Gotifri were paying no mind to h... Continue»
Posted by teflonsamurai 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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The Beautiful Officemate


I had always eyed her from the day I joined my new company just seeing her in her tight jeans and watching her ass move man I needed that ass we soon got close and were a lovely pair, We started of the regular petting sessions me kissing her lovely lips and she responded very well always opening her mouth wide to welcome my tongue. I would scoop out the saliva from her mouth with my tongue and taste it, and she loved to do the same, soon I was asking for more and so was she but had been fucked before it had been a long time and she just wasn't ready for it. Eventually we worked out a compr... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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The Wonderfully Naughty Wizard of Oz (Ch6/P2)

Leandra slide her mouth away from Kaliko cock. Stood up and began removing her clothing. Sliding her black gown over her head. She watched as Dorothy opened her mouth, sucking up and down his slim curved cock.

"Your body looks amazing my dear Leandra."

"I hate you for this Kaliko."

He laughed as his fingers slide through Dorothy hair. "You know you could stop. But the spell in the wine has heighten your deepest desires. Why can't you be like your friend Dorothy. She's enjoying herself." Dorothy opened her mouth wider and took his whole cock down. Her face buried in his white and gra... Continue»
Posted by teflonsamurai 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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For thousands of years, men have tried to understa

AIM:

Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.

You don't get any points for doing something she expects.

Sorry, that's just the way the game's played.

Here's a guide to the points system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed ...............................+1
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets.....-1
You leave the toilet seat up....................-5
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty... 0
When the toilet paper has run out, you resort to Kleenex...-1
You go out to bu... Continue»
Posted by Jim-Nice-But-Dim 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Sexy Fairytale part 4

Kristen followed the path until nightfall when she fell asl**p. Hesitant about sl**ping in a path, in case a carriage or something should come along, she found a little meadow just before sundown. Thankful that she'd had some time to rest after her gang-bang, Kristen curled up around herself on a soft patch of grass.

The next morning she awoke to musical humming...

Bolting awake and sitting upright, Kristen found herself facing a beautiful brunette wearing a jumper much like her own, except that it was red and still had a blouse. The young woman was about her age and was also wearing a ... Continue»
Posted by drew1207 10 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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