Sex Humor Porn Stories
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Red Light District Experience: Antwerp, Belgium

The Porn Chronicles continues following the adventures of Tyler Thomas and his sexcapades. There will be a video to come along this story, but the footage I got wasn't great so I wanted to write about it.

My travels had brought me to Antwerp, Belgium where I had found out has legal prostitution as well as a recommended Red Light District. The nice thing about it is that it's not as touristy and not near the main train station of the city, so you don't have the rowdiness that a place like Amsterdam offers. I was on a mission to find a hooker that would let me film our encounter.

... Continue»
Posted by thechronicles 6 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 300  |  
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Memories From the Bush

"You've got to be k**ding!" I shouted out loud.

"Whoever thought to name a town that, must have had a huge hairy pussy fetish!"

"WELCOME TO BIG BEAVER PA." The sign said.

I had almost arrived at my new home in Pleasant Town Pa. population 55,000.*

There was no way I could concentrate on my language learning tapes now, not when I was this close to my destination.

Plus my mind was wandering too much anyway. Seeing that "Big Beaver" sign reminded me of my old college days.

Up near Albany NY there's a town everyone refers to ... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 298  |  
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Women 'as likely as men to enjoy casual sex

It's not just men who are looking for 'friends with benefits'.

A Deakin University researcher has said that women are as likely as men to enjoy casual sexual arrangements, but for different reasons.

Kylie McCardle, who has been looking for 400 'friends with benefits' to take part in a survey, said the women who took part in an initial study said these arrangements gave them sexual confidence.

"The men were more likely to say they enjoyed the intimacy of the friendship," the Age quoted McCardle as saying.

The initial study was based on in-depth interviews with 15 couples, or 30 'fri... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 298  |  
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If I Had One of Those

If I had one of those I’d play with it all the time. I’d tease it and I’d pamper it. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for it. I’d use it every way I could think of. It’d be VERY MUCH worth it…
I’d show it off. “Hey, look what I’ve got!” I’d use it to tease all the boys. I’d wear really short skirts and the highest high heels, and I’d swing my hips just so, as only a real woman can. I’d spend a lot of time sitting in places where the boys walked by. I might even whistle at them! I’d be such a slut! When a really cute guy walked by I’d smile at him and open my legs to let him see ... Continue»
Posted by Volfy 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 298  |  
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my new life...

HELP! SOMEBODY HELP ME!! i screamed,as leon tackled me. 'you know better than to run from you master jewl.'he chuckled.'YOUR NOT MY GOD-DAMN MASTER , SO GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!'i yelled.'well looks like my little slave-slut needs punishment'he laughed , as he picked me up and put a ball gag in my mouth.then he slung me over his shoulder,as i began to wail.he took me all the way back up the long narrow drive.when we got through the door , he didnt put me down like he normally dose. he went straight to the torture room.'tisk-tisk,today i was going to pleasure you , but now i c... Continue»
Posted by sex-is-my-obsesion 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 296  |  
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fgjghjfgjfg

My mouth was super dry
can i feel your, luscious, lips locking with mine
sweetylittle smooth pussy was saturated with her moisture
u separate my pussy lips and drove ur tongue in
plese held my breasts against ur mouth and starting sucking on them
shall i softly, caressing ur breasts.
laying on the bed, hands in her pants,
i also rarely wore a bra
stuffed her fingers into her pussy
She never wore underwear
pulling her pants off or by sticking my cock in her hand/mouth
three fingers stuffed into her pussy with one hand and was rubbing her clit with the other
walked over to me,... Continue»
Posted by kelly_hot 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales  |  Views: 296  |  
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A cucumber, a Penis and an Olive...!!

A cucumber, an olive and a penis are talking.

The cucumber says "I hate my life, when I get big fat and juicy they cut me up and put me in salad."

The olive says "That's nothing, when I get big fat and juicy they cut me up and put me on pizza."

The penis says "You think you have it bad, when I get big fat and juicy they put me in a bag, throw me in a cave, shut the door and leave me there till I throw up"

... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 295  |  
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IN THE MOOD TO FUCK!!!!

ABRI JA'NAE HER NAME IS, BODY SO SILKY AND SMOOTH. OF COURSE SHE HAD ONE OF HER REGULAR DAYS SCHOOL, WORK, AND HOME.SHE WAKES UP FRM THE NAP SHE HAS TAKEN NOTICED TO SEE TIME HAS GONE BY.BRYAN COMES HOME IN NOTICES HER CLOTHES ARE THROWN ON THE FLOOR.HE QUITELY STANDS OVER HER WITH HIS 10 1/2 INCH DICK IN HER FACE, SHE OPENS HER MOUTH FOR A MIDNIGHT TREAT.GASPING FOR AIR HE HAS HIS DICK DOWN HER THROAT.SALIVA FROM HIS DICK COVERS HER MOUTH AND FACE.HE TOSS HER JUICY ROUND ASS OVER SO THAT HE CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT HER PUSSY LIPS, OR AS SHE SAY HER MOHOGANY TREASURES!HER ASS JIGGLES SAO MUCH T... Continue»
Posted by Mahoganykisses 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 295  |  
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The New Sexual Awakening: Part 3

Day 20

"It's been 20 days since I was exposed to the Augmented formula. In that time I have had several partners both male and female. The chemicle effect seems to supress inhabition as well as exaggerating Hormonal production. The effect even overrides sexual orientation as evidenced by my liason with a confirmed Lesbian classmate. With Spring Break quickly approaching I have decided to put my study on hold. I have developed a contact lense solution to dampen the effect of Occular stimulation."

Trevor closed his notebook and locked it in his desk drawer, then with bag in hand he proceed... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 294  |  
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The man

There once was a man who was in love with his hand.
He sat on the can,
with his dick in his hand,
beating his meat on the porcilan seat.
"wouldn't it be sweet" he said,
"If I could simply get some head"
but insted...
He moved his fat ass from the can to the bed. ... Continue»
Posted by srryipokedyoureyeout 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 292  |  
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JUST A LIL SUMTHING

One evening as you were relaxing at home after work, you hear the doorbell.

I am at the door. I tell you that I am there on business having to do with the house. (I have found out that the house that you rent is going to be sold). I tell you that I have to do a quick inspection and then I will be able to refund your housekeeping deposit.

You ask for ID, which I supply and then ask me in. We sit down in the living room and I ask you about ten questions about the house.

I ask you if you could take me on a tour and answer any questions as they come up. You say yes and start to show me ar... Continue»
Posted by PoRnStAr-LaLa 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 292  |  
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Omegle cybering C;

Stranger: i am admiring your boobies

Stranger: and imagining myself softly pinching your nipples :P

You: :D And I can imagine myself..Maybe moaning..Mayybeee if your good enough :3

Stranger: ohhh, youll moan

Stranger: i am pushing you back by your boobs agaist the wall

Stranger: and pressing my hips to yours so you cant move

You: Oh wow, So I ended losing control...Hehe well I like your style C:

Stranger: ;)

You: What if I were to then turn the tables and kiss your neck licking down your chest and sucking on your stomach ? Would you like that, Or am I the only who wou... Continue»
Posted by UNICORN_SEX 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 291  |  
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Freewill 504: Part 9 Brenda's Back

Freewill 504: Part 9 Brenda's Back (By Chris A)

Disclaimer: If you are u******e and/or easily offended by stories of an adult nature, then you should probably go away. This story and characters are purely fictitious, and any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Any one who believes they should try and recreate these situations and events in a real life situation needs to get serious help. With that said: enjoy!

It had been two weeks since the night that Laura and Jamie had sent me off slutting through the campus and in those two weeks my anger had continued to gro... Continue»
Posted by tzrlvr 1 year ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  Views: 291  |  
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Waiting

"Just a moment I would like to have a smoke before bed." Walking past the screen door I stop it before it slams but she heard the creeks I hear her steps down the white carpet stairs such a woman makes noise with every movement of her light frame that old screen door opens without a peep I know that darn thing doesnt like me. "Babe can you roll me one." my reply "yes" the cream paper already in my fingers I fold in half pinch the tabbacco then roll her fag hand her my flame she lites the glow set back stands far from the night sky a quick shine in her big blue eyes. "It may storm tonight, coul... Continue»
Posted by MattheMonster 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 290  |  
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a foxtail in como

so... a friend & i wrote this for another friend's b-day. she wrote the clean stuff & i wrote the smut & yes, a date w/Costner is like that.

A Foxtail in Como

or...

George Clooney is the biggest dick in hollywood, and he proved it in Taylor's ass.

by Mrs. Face
and
roxxanna valencya

It was a glorious spring day in lake country. The light breeze cast ripples over the bright blue water making it sparkle in the sunlight. Taylor and “Giorgio” (as the locals called him) were enjoying an afternoon bike ride through the village of Bellagio after spending a lazy morning at Clooney... Continue»
Posted by roxxanna 7 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 292  |  
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Dirty Dawg: Confessions of an Irredeemable BASTERD



Chapter 1: The Indian Intern


I had been working this shit job at a downtown law firm for quite some time had been considering quitting due to a wealth of “Busy Work” and my asshole of a supervisor Mr. Kumar. He was this Indian fuck who had started out six months ago in a satellite firm overseas and transferred into a management position. He was a big fan of cramming as much shit into an eight hour work period as humanly possible. He would watch ... Continue»
Posted by mondotoken 1 year ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 288  |  
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E-TYPE CHRISTMAS-(true event)

I HAVE TO THANK RETROLOVER, as a result of talking with him, my memory was set back to Christmas DAy morning 1980 at 0134 me and Two Work Mates who i will call "TOM and DICK" were waiting for the Staff Coach to take us home, these coaches were either 24 or 82 seter jobs normaly. TOM says "Hay whats this coming our way" Dick "no Can`t be for us shorly" along came the usual coach driver exept hes driving my boy hood dream car the E-Type Jaguar Sports Car, For those who don`t know it, a two seater, the driver had not checked-in to see if there was anyone who needed it, he was aparently just passi... Continue»
Posted by THEFORBIDDENMAN 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 287  |  
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Hopeless romantic...

Well, since this is my very first post here, I know I will be screwing something up as I go along. Please bear with me.. :)

I am always a believer of strong relationship. No matter how rocky a relationship is, love will find it's way to unite the two hearts. Many of us may have different fetishes but I am pretty sure that this is for the pleasure of the other partner. You may share your husband and wife, make them your slave or anything that you can think of, but at the end of the day, both of you will be back together sharing the same love and remembering the vows that you have exchanged t... Continue»
Posted by Killroy17 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 287  |  
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A RANDOM FREESTYLE SEX POEM FRESH FROM MY BRAIN

She had no panties on and a mini skirt.
When he ate her pussy it made her squirt.
He thrust his hard-on deep inside
It felt so good she nearly cried.
"I've never been fucked quite like this,"
Then he pulled out and came on her tits.
"Oh we're not done yet; not even close.
Finger my ass hole."
"No, that's gross."... Continue»
Posted by squirtlover33 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 286  |  
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Action-packed Big Sexy-time, Man. Make-a You Real

So, like, there was this woman, and she had really big tits, because that’s sexy. I mean, really big tits, like, she could topple an orphanage with them, and that’s sexy. And there was this guy; he didn’t have big tits, because that’s not very sexy. And one day he was like “hey, let’s do sex” and she was all like “okay.” So they started having sex and the guy was like “oh yeah” and the girl was just lying there like a corpse because that’s sexy and then the guy was all like “ooh, you feel like my mom” and the girl was just like “uhh.”

The guy was giving it to her... Continue»
Posted by theusernameyouhaveselectedisalreadyinuse 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 286  |  
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