Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 80

How to maintain a healthy sex drive

Obesity, diabetes, high bl**d pressure, thyroid dysfunction, adrenal exhaustion, poor nutrition, prescription medications, hormonal birth control, too much stress and too little sl**p. Many factors determine a healthy sex drive and today we're looking at what determines a healthy sex drive and how to maintain it.

Factors that determine a healthy sex drive
Sex hormones – For women both estrogen and testosterone at healthy levels are very vital in maintaining libido as well as fertility. In men too, testosterone is vital. Men with clinically defined low libido are often diagnosed with low ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Damaged scrotum story

A vicar asks his congregation if anyone would like to express thanks for their answered prayers.

A young woman makes her way to the front of the church and turns to face the congregation. "I would like to give thanks to my answered prayers! she announces. "Six months ago, my husband, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was agonizing and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."

A stifled gasp came from every man in the congregation as they imagined the pain that the poor man must have experienced.

The young woman continued, "My ... Continue»
Posted by sjroche1509 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The life drawing model and I (Based on true story)

This just happened two nights ago (I have used fake names of course though) :) .

Alex had been single for nine months and decided to join a dating website. After two weeks of a few boring dates in the city, he was requested an add by a Serbian girl named Mili one night that lived about fourty minutes away from him. He accepted her, and they chatted for awhile until the conversation went along to:

9.17pm

Mili says: So you do a lot of life drawing?
Alex says: Yes, I love it, it is my passion in life.
Mili says: I have never tried it, but I wouldn't mind...
Alex says: What, really? It... Continue»
Posted by aussieguy00000 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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A Lunchbreak

(Mark rushes home to her bedroom for lunch)

Mark called home, his meeting had been canceled and he decided to come home for lunch. Of course, with an hour's drive to get home, he hoped it would actually be lunch and a whole lot more. The k**s were at school and it had been a while since him and his wife had done anything, so Mark was hopeful.

Allison knew exactly how to serve lunch, and it had very little to with cooking or food. Fully aware of the opportunity, she changed out of her everyday clothes, noticing how firm her nipples already were and seeing the tell-tale damp spot in her pa... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Italian Job 20

The Italian Job 20
The night went well with Maria giving her usual performance, she was staring at me as she took the guys in turn as they lined up to fill her with spunk, it was running down her legs in rivers by the time they had finished and got bored with her,
I was surprised because neither Sonia or Yvonne got involved with anyone else and there were plenty of potential suitors but they didn’t seem to want to know, Christina was still a bit sore in her arse but she took some guy in the pool that I think both eased the problem with her arse and took her mind off the problem because she... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Steamy story

I originally wrote this for a chick on a dating site who may or may not have been a dude... or a bot...

I'm looking at that picture of you in the black dress with the white polka dots. I can imagine you wearing that, one spaghetti strap dangling over your tattooed shoulder. Our eyes meet with a sultry glance and your hand teasingly reaches into your dress, exposing more of your creamy white flesh, but not enough to reveal aereola. From the bulge in my pants and the approving look on my face, you know the curves of your toned, slender body are driving me to the edge of sanity. First, yo... Continue»
Posted by Fork 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Sweet Loretta Modern

Host: "Good evening. If you're just joining us, we're talking tonight with Loretta Modern, star of the new... (clears throat)... adult film 'Lady Lust'.

Loretta: "Good evening."

Host: "So, tell us, Loretta, do you really enjoy your work, or are you just fake fucking for the camera?"

Loretta: "I can assure you, Tom, there's nothing fake about it. And, yes, I really do like it. I've done other types of work in my life and this is the most... fun I've ever had working (laughs)."

Host: "Caller, you have a question for Loretta?"

Caller: "Hello, Loretta. I'm Jim"
... Continue»
Posted by mustbtuesday 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Ambushed Part 1

By the fall of 1976 Elizette and I had been deeply involved for over a year. A petite Brazilian, she had jet black hair the length of her back, flawless bronze skin, large, dark brown eyes, and a lissome, graceful body. At twenty, she was almost insatiably sexual. We would have sex five or six times a week, sometimes three times a day. Everything from long languid afternoons of massage and foreplay to quickies in public places. Once at a baseball game she sat on my lap in a tactically parted wrap around skirt. On another, we fuck like mink, buck naked, on the altar of a Catholic church und... Continue»
Posted by anacharsis 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Awkward sexy time!

Real story:
My girlfriend and I had been dating for roughly 5 months. If you know relationships this is usually the prime period for tons of sex.
One night, after dinner and movie, my girlfriend and I decided to head back to her apartment for some "physical activity". Upon entering her apartment we discovered that her roommate had left and was not planning on returning until late, the following morning. This was perfect, (her roommate was always complaining that we had sex that was too loud)we could really let go in the bedroom and have the time of our lives.
We started to make out in the... Continue»
Posted by wrkUSA 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Susie Wong

A little background: Eddie, a friend of mine, and I take alternate shifts at a security office. The office is usually quiet, we just have to be there, be responsible, watch the monitors, that sort of thing. At night no one ever visits.

Well, no one except Eddie's wife Susie. She's half-Chinese, very attractive, very outgoing, and with a mouth and attitude like a Marine on shore leave! She'd had quite an upbringing in this Navy town and was quite the handful for her Chinese father, a first-generation immigrant, and her American redneck mother! (Those two are another whole story, but ne... Continue»
Posted by cptfritz 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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sweet revenge due to social networks

It was right before the hoildays of 2011 and my wife and I separtated. Feeling lonely and down due to the fact my wife was like i'll never get anyone that looks as good as her and put it on me the way she can which I thought due to the fact my wife on a off day is like a 8 and when she on a 10 and the sex is straight crazy. So feeling bad im on the phone with my b*****r and he's like go on a social site and look for old friends and get out im like please that shit dont work hes like you always find out how much someone wanted to fuck your brains out years later. So i'm like i'll try this so I ... Continue»
Posted by sparks1110 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  
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A story for the holidays

Christmas is a time of joy and happiness, OR boredom and loneliness.

Let me back up a bit, Christmas time, three years ago, sometime during the night, my cock was running in and out of Anna's pussy. It was all wet down there, well lubricated and it was fun. I was kissing her shoulder, fiddling her titties and ramming her pussy with my cock. Back, forth, back, forth, ... Anna turns over, she kisses me on the lips and starts sucking them. I am fingering her around her butt hole and spreading her butt cheeks while pushing her lower body to rub her pussy on my body. We didn't do it anally excep... Continue»
Posted by happytaquito 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Mom and I together, Forever




I grew up in tirupati, my name is Ajay. Girls/Women of any age could get in touch with me on bavahemachandar@gmail.com


My father was a mild mannered man who worked in a mill. He had one addiction, he drank heavily and many a night he would pass out and had to be helped to bed. He was good to my mother and I could see that she respected and loved him. But I sensed there was also sadness in her and at that time I could not understand why.


I helped mother
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Panties with Matching Earrings

We are an “ah hoc” team thrown together for this development project. I am Robbie, and I am a contract engineer specializing in electronic sensors. There is our resident geek, Markie who handles the electronics end of things. Mr. Cho stops by from time to time as he is the representative of the company who actually manufactures the product. Marlene, the designer is in charge of making sure that everything is tasteful and attractive. And there is “J” who is our intern and general good sport about things.

What is that we are developing? Well, I thought it was a tasteless joke when I was told ... Continue»
Posted by windsorkeith 1 month ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Telling a Woman the Truth about her Vaginal Odor

When I was single and using aol to meet women I chatted with a self-proclaimed 'curvy' 24-year-old gal named Lisa. I didn't see any photo of her ahead of time (and this was before the days of built-in cameras/skyping) but she did tell me that she had red hair on top and on the bottom. I followed up by asking if she shaved or trimmed any of her pubic hair. Her response was music to my ears(or eyes since we were chatting): "No, but it's like in between strawberry blonde and red, so I always thought it was kind of pretty." Of course, anyone who knows me knows that I love pussy hair no matter ... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 14 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Fate

Fate: Noun
"The Development of events outside a person's control, regarded as determined by a Supernatural power."

The last few months had not been going well for Sam, he lost his job and his girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend. After bouncing around from job to job he landed in a garage. A massive step down from his last job but thanks to a love of Cars given to him by his Father he was happy. He quickly found a kindred spirit in Owen, a fellow Mechanic and car buff, the two became fast friends.

On one particular evening Owen was invited to go out for a night of drinking a... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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One freaky day

I had to post this story and please believe this story is so true. I was about 25 and i had this 19 year old girl friend. It was xmas eve and I wanted her to come stay at my place so i went out to her house on the train to get her. As we waited for the train going back to my house "shell" is what im calling her(not her real name)decided she needed something in her mouth. So we went inside a shelter waiting area and she sat on the bench and i stood to watch out for others that my decide to stand inside. She unbuckled my pants like she saw flames in my pants and wasted no time getting my dick in... Continue»
Posted by addictedtooralsex 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Dumb? but I am not blond

During my freshmen year in High School I was new to this country. I didn't much about it. My f****y had just moved from Mexico to California and we had no clue how different things worked here, and how similiar were other things. When I was living in Mexico we had no money, but every month my mom managed to pay the rent. A man would come in every first of the month and ask for the money. My mom would ask me to go to my room. Then she would walk to the guy to her room and after two hours he would leave the house. So happy that he would forget to ask for the money. Back then I had no idea what r... Continue»
Posted by latintetas 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Uncle Timmy Takes Control...Part 1

Before coming over we lived in a village outside Middleton...I say village but it was two houses either side of a road really.It would take mammy and daddy about 20 minutes into town for the shopping or the cinema or whatever.When they went out for the night I would babysit.
I don't know if it was that daddy was a civilised man or that mammy had trouble inside but unlike others we knew,there was only me and the baby and a good few years between us too....Nice peaceful house.Hahahaha.

I came home from college one day to see the car gone and Uncle Timmy making himself at home with the teapot... Continue»
Posted by Janeandthedonkey 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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My Friend Fucking My Wife Like A Whore

My wife Sara and I have been married for almost five years and we are still as in love now as the day we met. I met her at work and we just instantly hit it off and began dating and a year and a half later got married. Sara is thirty seven years old and twelve years older then me and has two k**s a son and a daughter so I guess she is a M.I.L.F. People refuse to believe how old she is when they hear her age because she looks like she is in her twenty's. She had blond hair with black highlights, green eyes and a tight body which is stacked. I know that I am a lucky son of a bitch because beside... Continue»
Posted by vanilla_gorilla699 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Hardcore  |  
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