Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 78

The Dentist Put Her Under and Put It in Her

"It's a wreck, is what it is," Tommy Cordova half mumbled through the gauze of the surgical mask, his face bent closely to Kate's face, the polished steel mirror working to varying angles in her mouth.

I heard Kate stifle a sob, her right eye doing a minute tic towards where I stood, arms crossed, sagged in the corner of the exam room.

Tommy straightened up after another moment and slipped the magnified safety glasses off his face. "Two molars are shot. The one furthest back looks okay."

"I don't want 'em pulled," Kate mumbled, lifting up in the dental chair just a bit.

"Gotta come... Continue»
Posted by PureCoffee 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Dogs That Started It All

I knew about sex since I was about 13 but I only started experimenting when I was about 15, I’m 26 now. When I was 15 I began to “do a little research” I guess you could call it… I watched porn. I saw rather sexy woman get fucked rough and hard by men with huge dicks. I also watched as women played with their sexy little pussies and cum all over the place. Needless to say, I began to masturbate.
But, this story isn’t about all that. That was just a little background information. This story is about my dogs Buddy and Rocky.

Buddy:

When I was still “researching” sex when I was about 16, I... Continue»
Posted by qudduse 10 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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My wifes new job

Angela got ready for her first day of work at the LE
GIRLS agency in downtown Manhattan. She felt anxious
but mostly disgusted with having to get the job. It was
only because of her husband that she got it to begin
with. He had lost another job and now hung around the
house in his underwear looking shabby and mostly
pathetic. Life had been very difficult most times with
him but now they were near impossible. Even their sex
life suffered. Where once they had sex every night, now
they barely had it once a month.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Not too bad she
thought... Continue»
Posted by griffen1 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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"A Day In A Life"

Bill had left for work an hour earlier. His last action before shutting the door was a perfunctory kiss on her cheek as he hurried out the door, his mind already occupied on the day's events. Again, he had missed the significance of her squeeze on his upper arm; again he missed entirely, the questioning look she gave his retreating back.

"Jay; get up, you're going to be late." Jean shouted at the top of her voice over the edge of the banister. Jamie was a typical angst ridden teenage young man, lazy and disinclined to venture out of bed before the last minute, or he had ... Continue»
Posted by fotoplace 6 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Surprise!

Here I was, on a Sunday night, going in the club to have some fun.
After few hours of dancing and drinking, one pretty girl came and asked me to dance with her. Looking at her I saw that she`s not a "grenade" so I was thinking maybe I will have some fun tonight so we started dancing. After a while I started rubbing her ass, then I kissed her...OMG she was such a good kisser.
After she broke the kiss she asked me to come to her place and I was so excited that i took her hand and put it to feel my boner.
She gigled and we start walking to her place.
As soon as we arrived..i couldnt stop ki... Continue»
Posted by mercander 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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k**napped!


A little lesbian tale of sex slavery that I hope you will find amusing.


It had been, frankly, a rather wretched Friday. It started badly when Mr Jameson, the chief librarian, trapped me (again) in Maritime History (M to R) and practically wrestled me to the floor. When I told him for the umpteenth time that my interests lay in a different direction, he rather breezily replied that he was 'up for a 69 if that's what you mean'. Eventually I fought him off with a leather bound copy of A History of Nelson (Vol 2). Then, over lunch I had to listen to Maure... Continue»
Posted by Sapphiclover 5 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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My Sexy And Hot Mami



Hi! All reader I am male from Gujarat and I am writing my true story first time. Let me tell u that my English is so low so u finds lot of mistake in my writing but I assure u that u like my true experience. Let’s come to story I am 20 yr old living in small town in Gujarat in my f****y my father mother me and my s****r r there. We are living in city area. Where we have lot of neighbours but one is special for me.

I like alder ladies then girls and the big assets always attract me. One of our neighbors named Chaya. She is 44 yr old she is my fantasy and I always have a crush to fuck he... Continue»
Posted by fairpussy 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Past of the Great Takuri and his Gift

January 30. 2012
This is my first Journal entry. Why do people write a journal? Probably because they’re lonely. But I, the great Takuri, or at least that’s what I’m calling myself these days, am never lonely. No I’m writing this journal so that other people can see, can read what great things I’ve done and where I’ve erred. It feels like I’m writing the truth. As a magician I spent my whole life living in illusions, bending the truth both to the audience but also to my humble self, now it feels like I can finally tell the whole story, you can’t go to somebody who you are manipulating and tel... Continue»
Posted by shanina 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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MY FAV JOKES

Patient to doctor: The problem is that obesity runs in our f****y. Doctor to patient: No.............the problem's that no one runs in your f****y.

I was walking home late one night and saw a woman in the shadows.
"Ten pounds . ." she whispers.
I'd never been with a prostiture before, so i decided, it’s only a tenner,why not, So we hide in the bushes.
Were going at it for a minute or so when all of a sudden a light flashes on us. It’s a policeman.,"Ello ello ello,What’s going on here, " asks the officer.
"I’m making love to my wife!, " i answered indignantly.
"Oh, I’m sorry, " say... Continue»
Posted by icumonu 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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She Doesn't Like Girls

A few weekends ago I picked my girlfriend (as in, my friend who is a woman) up from the airport.

I met her about a month after she turned 18 and first had a threesome with her and the man we had in common upon our very first meeting. We had been chatting and flirting prior to meeting. We'd exchange pics and share our favorite porn over emails and texts, getting excited for our first meeting in a week or so. We loved the same kind of porn and we talked about how fun meeting up would be with our common lover. That was February 2012 and we are still very close friends…

When I picked her up... Continue»
Posted by Missy_X 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Cute And Sensual School Love

As it turned out I was the highest scorer in my cbse exams of class 10 among that class, so very soon I started getting my response from teachers and friends including girls. A few of them struck me as they were very beautiful, and one of them was she. Even though I am writing this story with our mutual consent, let me not display her name, some things are better kept secret. She was a damn good looking girl, with a cute look, average height of 5.3 and a killing smile. A smile for which half the school will die for. She was among the most beautiful girls of the school. She had small boobs whic... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Beautiful Officemate


I had always eyed her from the day I joined my new company just seeing her in her tight jeans and watching her ass move man I needed that ass we soon got close and were a lovely pair, We started of the regular petting sessions me kissing her lovely lips and she responded very well always opening her mouth wide to welcome my tongue. I would scoop out the saliva from her mouth with my tongue and taste it, and she loved to do the same, soon I was asking for more and so was she but had been fucked before it had been a long time and she just wasn't ready for it. Eventually we worked out a compr... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Types of Sex between a Couple

In order to fully enjoy these practices, you must ensure you understand all of the potential ramifications prior to engaging in them.

Three is not a crowd

It is a common dream which in today’s time and age has the potential to be oh-so real. It involves you, your partner, and another person. Most people enter it to experience a new form of sex as they are bored of the ‘vanilla’ sex they have with their partner. However, the best would be if all three of you are reasonably well known to each other and comfortable enough to enjoy a sexual act.

Advantage: You have the chance to spice up ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Fully Dressed

Have you and another given each other a mind blowing orgasm while fully dressed???????????????

I worked in this kitchen in Fl. and there was this waitress that would always brush her large tits and plump ass against me when ever she would pass me in the kitchen area. So we talked flirtatiously to one another for about two weeks.

One night out back taking a break she comes out and we get into a heated conversation. She noticed I had a massive hard-on and she said "I wish I could ride that cock right now". I had on a pair of loose chef pants; she had on a pair of black tight cotton/polyest... Continue»
Posted by Gehld 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Helping Daughter In law

This is a story my friend secretly told me
Iam a young housewife married a year ago and have given birth to a baby about two months old now and taying with my FIL (father in law) and hubby is working in the states. MIL (mother in law) is no more and so alone with FIL who takes care of every need as for my looks; I am quite pretty and endowed with good sexy features. usually wear saree below my navel well wrapped up to enhance my sexiness along with a well fitted blouse.
Mostly sleeveless and with front and back deep cut to expose my full and firm boobs and clevage. These days my boobs are fu... Continue»
Posted by sarosh 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Kevin's coach and his daughter Alice

Kevin is an 18 y/o, blond-blue eyed, very successful sports student, promising a bright future. When his coach Mr. Adams invited Kevin over for dinner, Kevin was very excited.

Coach Adams was a handsome,fit and lean, salt & pepper type, grey haired guy in his late 40s', Kevin was gazing admiringly at all these gold and silver cups Coach Adams won since his early teens in the living room when he heard Mrs. Adams' voice, letting them know that dinner was ready.

It was Kevin's first time meeting his coach's f****y members, he already knew that his coach was a father of two, a young boy n
... Continue»
Posted by Slave4str8twinks 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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My Biggest regret

My biggest regret.


My name Sally Andrews I’m 42 years of age and have a son of 16 years named Kevin,
I have been married for over 20 years to Tom but we are currently separated due to my husband having an affair with one of our best friends wife,
My son still see’s his father every week so we have time to talk about our son when he come’s,

I think he would like us to get back together as he tells me the affair is over,
I still cannot forgive him for what he has done to me and as yet but we are working on it,
My son would love us to get back together and be a f****y again.

Befo... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 10 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Funny weed cunnilingus story

I have a funny, and frankly, hot, story from spring break 1996 when I went to Jamaica with my friends in college. There, I met a fellow spring breaker named Jamie who was a bit of a hippychick complete with cornrows (that she had done in Jamaica as many tourists are apt to do). Our evening consisted of an all-night toking and 69 session in her hotel room. The air was so dense with weed smoke that I really couldn't smell her otherwise musky pussy. However, I was kind of on the look-out because when I started taking off her panties to lick her pussy she actually said, "Umm, I just want to warn '... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 8 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Meating The Hammer Man

I turned and slowly struck a pose in profile while Dede panned around my long hard on. "Have any of you seen Hammer Man?"

"Nope!" answered Cessa.

"Oh well," I sighed. "Do you suppose while we wait one of you could, (dramatic pause) Fuck me up my ass?"

********************************************************************

It was hard to believe that this was the same place I was in several weeks ago. Gone was all the casual joking, and the laid back atmosphere. It was replaced with all kinds of tension and a strictly business attitude.

Th... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 6 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
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HERES ANOTHER ONE FOR THE BOOKS!

* KARI'S, JAILHOUSE SWANK!!!






------ Looking to get layed, Huh, Babe? Do you need me, Now, Want to get loud, and feeling proud? I know you want this, and I have it! So, come ready, and with it! Just, got to love this, "Shi... Continue»
Posted by JUICYBOX 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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