Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 77

My best friend got lucky and shared with me

My best friend when I was 16 lived 2 doors down. We did most everything together. We'd go to the mall, movies and swam at the pool. Today we were going to go to the pool after school. He told me to come to his house when I was ready. We had known each other for years, our families too. It was normal for us to just walk in each others house like f****y. I had changed my clothes when I got home and went to his house, walking in as usual and headed to his room. When I reached his door, which was half open, I stopped. Looking in I saw he was naked laying on the bed, and his step-s****r was sucking... Continue»
Posted by querico44 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Summer of '77

--A young man's introduction into CFNM--

Chapter 1

Young Adam was a very shy boy.

A little awkward, a little on the geeky side, Adam was very much into science and building models. He spent much time in his room.
By the time he was 18, Adam had won a scholarship to attend Indiana University. It was the summer of 1977, and Adam had a few weeks left with his step mom, Natalie, and his step s****r, Rachel.

Adam lost his father when he was very young, and spent his entire c***dhood growing up with two women in the household, and no males.
It was weird at times for him, but a ver... Continue»
Posted by jkd1111 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  

The Creation Of The Vagina

My 2nd Story:
The Creation Of The Vagina

There were seven wise men so fine.
creating a pussy to thier design.
The first was a butcher, Short and wit, using a knife he created a slit.
The second was a sculptor, strong and bold, using a hammer and chisel he created a hole.
The third was a hunter, short and stout, using the fur of a fox he lined it without.
The fourth was a fisherman, nasty as hell, he threw in a fish giving it the smell.
The fifth was a chef, short and big around the waste, he sprinkled some salt giving it a salty taste.
The sixith was a milk man, Tall and thin, he ... Continue»
Posted by Ari32 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Fourth of July Slumber Party

This Fourth of July started out just like any other. Little did I know that this day would change my life forever. I went over to my boyfriend's house in the middle of the afternoon for the f****y picnic. The plan was for me to watch fireworks with Danny, my boyfriend, and his f****y and then take his s****r, Whitney, to their aunt's house.

The day went exactly as planned. We went to Danny's grandparents' house for dinner, then to the park to watch fireworks. After fireworks, I gave Danny a kiss goodbye then Whitney and I drove to their aunt's house.

"Want to come up and have a few dri... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Velma cums clean with Shaggy

Shaggy felt cold slobber on his face, waking him immediately. "Oh man, Scooby..." he groaned. Scooby-Doo, his Great Dane, began giggling and licked his face again. Shaggy responded by a scratch between his brown ears. "Norville!!" a female voice called from upstairs. "Come and get breakfast!"

"Mom, like, stop calling me that!"

"As long as you're still living in my basement, I'll call you whatever I like, now get your breakfast!"

Shaggy looked at Scooby and said, "Like, well, let's get something to eat." Food was his primary motivation in doing anything.

Shaggy ran up the stairs, cl... Continue»
Posted by shmoe13 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Dad is boss

I have a strange story. My dad had a high sex drive and I could hear he and mom fuck many times every night. He also fucked her every morning before they got up. My room was next to theirs and I could hear it all. I was the oldest of four k**s. I had two s****rs and a b*****r younger than me. We were all home schooled and seldom left our farm. My mom was a sexy looking woman and dad was very handsome. I could see why they fucked all the time. I walked in the kitchen one time when dad had his hand under moms dress and was fingering her pussy as she stood in front of the sink. When I walked in h... Continue»
Posted by justfordaddy 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Ship Wrecked

Off the coast of Africa it was a stormy dark night. The sailing ship about a mile out at sea was being battered by the violent rain and thunder storm. The mast was torn from the ship and fell overboard and the ship took on water from waves coming over it's sides and draining down the hatches filling the hull of the vessel. The ship was rocked and slammed back and forth breaking apart from the torrid storm and sank to the bottom of the ocean.
Out of the 50 man crew only 2 survived and washed up on the sandy beach. As the storm subsided and the sun rose it became a nice calm day. The 2 men ... Continue»
Posted by Warwood 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Farm job

My wife and I own alot of property,and a few horses.I am 6 foot tall 220 and about 8 inches.She is 5'2 about 140 and has 38dd tits,mm nice. Ok we got a horse that was about 2 years old.One day it seemed to be a little down so i called the vet.Lora asked me what the vet said. "he said the horse,Sam we called him,was in need of some attention.he said if I jerk it off the thing will be fine." She laughed.So reluctant to do it i asked my wife if she would please help me.It took some persuation but it was for Sam's health so she finally agreed to help,but seemed disgusted be it.
... Continue»
Posted by sexybirsen 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Funniest story ever!! ...Enjoy

I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me...It was her beautiful younger s****r.

My prospective s****r-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate because she never did it when she was near anyone else.

One day her 'little' s****r called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I ... Continue»
Posted by thedurbnow 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Malini having sex with milkman

When Malini got married to Devender, people who attended their wedding said the match is not alright. Because Malini was a cute short statured, delicate beauty, whereas Devemder was a seven footer, with large limbs fit for a basket ball player or a boxer. Malini had done her graduation in Hindi and Devender also did his grad. and was working in a govt. office.

He liked to eat good and tasty food and malini was an expert cook. But in the bedroom he was a brute. He never talked to her small niceties or did anything by way of foreplay. When he feels like sex, he just sticks his penis into her ... Continue»
Posted by lildudexst 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  

The Dentist Put Her Under and Put It in Her

"It's a wreck, is what it is," Tommy Cordova half mumbled through the gauze of the surgical mask, his face bent closely to Kate's face, the polished steel mirror working to varying angles in her mouth.

I heard Kate stifle a sob, her right eye doing a minute tic towards where I stood, arms crossed, sagged in the corner of the exam room.

Tommy straightened up after another moment and slipped the magnified safety glasses off his face. "Two molars are shot. The one furthest back looks okay."

"I don't want 'em pulled," Kate mumbled, lifting up in the dental chair just a bit.

"Gotta come... Continue»
Posted by PureCoffee 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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My wifes new job

Angela got ready for her first day of work at the LE
GIRLS agency in downtown Manhattan. She felt anxious
but mostly disgusted with having to get the job. It was
only because of her husband that she got it to begin
with. He had lost another job and now hung around the
house in his underwear looking shabby and mostly
pathetic. Life had been very difficult most times with
him but now they were near impossible. Even their sex
life suffered. Where once they had sex every night, now
they barely had it once a month.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Not too bad she
thought... Continue»
Posted by griffen1 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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"A Day In A Life"

Bill had left for work an hour earlier. His last action before shutting the door was a perfunctory kiss on her cheek as he hurried out the door, his mind already occupied on the day's events. Again, he had missed the significance of her squeeze on his upper arm; again he missed entirely, the questioning look she gave his retreating back.

"Jay; get up, you're going to be late." Jean shouted at the top of her voice over the edge of the banister. Jamie was a typical angst ridden teenage young man, lazy and disinclined to venture out of bed before the last minute, or he had ... Continue»
Posted by fotoplace 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Who Owned Me-2

"Ohhhh ... Please!" I whimpered, spreading my thighs and putting myself at the dog's mercy.

I didn't know what to expect. If he would bite me or simply smell my raw, uncovered sex and satisfy his curiosity. Whatever he would do, I knew I couldn't stop him. I felt helpless. The entire episode had happened so quickly that I felt overwhelmed by it. Everything between opening the bathroom door for the dog and finally surrendering as I opened my legs seemed like a blur. It had only taken a few seconds, half a minute perhaps, and I found myself completely dominated by the a****l somehow.

There... Continue»
Posted by stif266 1 month ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Here I was, on a Sunday night, going in the club to have some fun.
After few hours of dancing and drinking, one pretty girl came and asked me to dance with her. Looking at her I saw that she`s not a "grenade" so I was thinking maybe I will have some fun tonight so we started dancing. After a while I started rubbing her ass, then I kissed her...OMG she was such a good kisser.
After she broke the kiss she asked me to come to her place and I was so excited that i took her hand and put it to feel my boner.
She gigled and we start walking to her place.
As soon as we arrived..i couldnt stop ki... Continue»
Posted by mercander 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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Small dick laughed at by 2 nurses

A friend of mine is a doctor and as part of her training she did a stint in the sexual health wing of the hospital she was working in. She is a very game girl constantly regaling us with tales of funny medical incidents. She told me about games she and her colleagues played to keep themselves amused and spirits high while working in quite a gritty environment.

She said they had a hilarious time asking really intimate questions because people would answer 100% honestly (very eye opening she said).. other guys would treat it like counselling and the moment the door shut on the examination r... Continue»
Posted by peteash 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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A little lesbian tale of sex slavery that I hope you will find amusing.

It had been, frankly, a rather wretched Friday. It started badly when Mr Jameson, the chief librarian, trapped me (again) in Maritime History (M to R) and practically wrestled me to the floor. When I told him for the umpteenth time that my interests lay in a different direction, he rather breezily replied that he was 'up for a 69 if that's what you mean'. Eventually I fought him off with a leather bound copy of A History of Nelson (Vol 2). Then, over lunch I had to listen to Maure... Continue»
Posted by Sapphiclover 5 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Morning Sex w/ My Friend

Stef was going through a messy breakup. That on top of everything else. Her dog just died, she was having trouble at work. They say everything happens in threes - the proverbial "They" who are never of any use!

About Stef, briefly. I've known her for about four years. She's 22 and built big enough to kick your arse and she will if she has to, trust me. I like strong women and she has a bit of a young Lucy Lawless look to her. yes, we've already fooled around in the past.

Well, I tongue fucked her before we were interrupted and then our relationships seemed to just keep getting in the wa... Continue»
Posted by dantheman1980 10 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Brian and Lois

One day Lois came home from the store,Peter was still at work,Chris and Meg were still at school and Stewie was fast asl**p in his bedroom.She called out for Brian I got some of your favorite treats at the store Brian!Come sit on my lap Brian,she petted him and brushed his fur,say Brian how would you like to use that long K9 tongue on my hungry red bush?"Would I Lois",I thought you'd never ask!Lois slid her pants off and tossed her panties on the floor.Ooh I'm getting so wet thinking about your tongue on my pussy Brian leaned in tasting the musky damp wetness between Lois's thighs,he began to ... Continue»
Posted by goo4u 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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My friend Jerry returns

Jerry and I had been friends since we were nine or 10 years old, we played together, and learned about girls together over the next couple years as we started puberty. Whenever we were alone together we would talk about girls and get so horny and masturbate together. I don't remember exactly when, but at some point we both became curious and began to wonder what it was like to touch another guys cock and so it began as we explored each other. We both found it very exciting to touch and play with each other and before long we were giving each other blow jobs. I really liked taking Jerry's soft ... Continue»
Posted by querico44 2 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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