Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 77

My True Thing!

My first Blowjob was with 45+ aged man and its was f***eful against my wish. That was first time I touched PENIS and after that incident was feeling so sinful, which made me to watch PORN in my free time and been to xHamster.

After being here got a desire to catch thick white man's penis, so was searching for safe man locally and got one Australian in FaceBook, who use to stay in India working as Network engineer. He dint knew that I was 18 and used to send lots of erected penis snaps to me, and its was really thick white one.

A day... Continue»
Posted by indianbee 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 699  |  
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mom son with mom son

I noticed the crowd of boys leaning against cars by the curb in
front of the convenience store when he went in. He never liked
seeing guys just hanging around looking for trouble. He usually
minded his on business, but the sound of a young woman in
distress alarmed him. He left his purchase on the store counter
and went out to investigate. A young woman was being pushed
around between the thugs while they grabbed at her backside.
The hoard laughed hardily. One of the gang members pulled up
the back of the girl’s dress and grabbed her butt-cheeks. I ran up
behind the young man holding ... Continue»
Posted by shokeen_ 3 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 4596  |  
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Hardonis Academy P-12

Chapter 12, Third Day


The three new friends met at breakfast the next day, they were all smiling. Even though they had not had sex with each other, they seemed sure of forming a tight bond. The Academy was centered on the Hall building, which included the dining area, library, club rooms, student council and newspaper offices, and the theater. To the East were the two dorm buildings. To the West was the sports complex, which included the medical office. To the north was the administration building, witch included the guidance councilor’s office. To the South was the large square ... Continue»
Posted by VictorL4fun 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 373  |  
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My bestfriends dad and me

ok this is the most weird day i had and its true. one day me and my friend planned a sl**pover at her house, we got to her bed room and she said she forgot something down stairs and she left me upstairs. im thinking "what a ass" and i hear the door across the hallway opening and their he was, her dad sexy,strong,six pack,young, and had cute brown hair,hotter then hell i blushed when he seen me and he smiled and said "oh you must be my little girls bestie" and laughed i laughed to and said yes, Oh lol so might want the part when it was night and my friend left to get food for a long time..... i... Continue»
Posted by babychiken44 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2310  |  
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Joke for today

WY

An Englishman was holidaying in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. One day they were strolling along a nude beach when they noticed a naked Black local also strolling towards them.

The Black guy notices the white guy has '" WY" tattooed on his penis and asks what it stands for? The white guy says .. Well when I get an erection it spells my girlfriends name " WENDY " , The surprised white guy sees that the Black guy also has " WY " tattooed on his penis and asks what it stands for?

The black guy says , well when I get an erection it spells " WE... Continue»
Posted by cocoabutter 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 742  |  
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Paybacks Are A Bitch

"Fuck you, you fucking low cunt she screamed." " Fuck You,Fuck You,Fuck You That Hurt"
Over and over again. Each "Fuck You" was punctuated by a flying object.
Both pillows whistled past my head, followed by the bedside clock, my wallet from the nightstand and 2 mobile phones.
Jesus she was angry.
I tried to explain.. but she wasn't in any mood to listed... I pleaded..."It was an accident"... really.
My cock went up her arse. I was just fucking her doggie style and pulled back to really ram it home and it came out. Instead of using my hand to guide it back into her cunt I just pushed and ... Continue»
Posted by bardeen 7 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3225  |  
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Typical Teenager

I have always had a great relationship with my Nephew “tubs” his real name is Shaun and I think I am the only person who has a nickname for him which is not directly connected with his almost luminous ginger hair, which he hates.
Susan my girlfriend has not the same soft spot for tubs as his typical hyper-active teenage antics and cheek get right on her nerves and since he has turned thirteen he seems to have developed an unhealthy obsession with Susan’s underwear. She caught him raking through the washing basket and laying out her thongs and bras for close inspection, he thought she was on t... Continue»
Posted by award6 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 2842  |  
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Jane and the Belly Dancer

Jane and the Belly Dancer

We resumed fucking and for the first time in my life I began to feel sick to my
stomach while having sex. It was time to resume my self coaching.

"This is how I'm gonna someday make THE BIG BUCKS! Just a few more minutes.
Oh shit look at those tits bounce! The way she's moving her legs. OMG OMG OMG!

***********************************************************************

I gazed into the full length mirror inside the dressing room and admired
my new makeover. There was fresh make up on my face which for the first
time ever, included f... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 804  |  
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Peter's Pointer

It was nearly midnight and Molly was bored out of her mind. Her friend Peter was here and he insisted that she took the bed. It was extremely hot out but that didn't seem to bother Peter. They chatted about school and parents for awhile until Peter changed the conversation to relation ships...
"So who's the lucky guy that gets to spend lunch with you?" asked Peter mockingly.
"Peter shut up.. you know I don't have a boyfriend.. and what about you and Sarah?" Tutted Molly with a hint of jealousy. Peter laughed and said something about breaking up with her a couple days ago but something else ... Continue»
Posted by sluef 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 596  |  
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A Teacher's Pet

In 2004, when I was 16 I started writing erotic stories. This is the very first one I wrote, about a teacher I had the hots for. Enjoy....

I am a 6th form student doing A level chemistry. Twice a week I am taught by Mrs Pen. From the first moment I saw her I was obsessed with her. She is 5'7" with a good figure and nice round breasts and a nice firm ass. I would often rush home to wank over the idea of slamming my cock into her pussy. On day, late in my second year, my dream came true.

I came in for a lesson just before my final exam to find I was the only student. Mrs Pen didn't ... Continue»
Posted by simonenglish 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1360  |  
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GoodCake

Shes sitting there in the corner of my eye asking why I have to make a mess she knows my cakes take time to prepare bake and set. Whisking the eggs fluffing my batter she waits my forearms tighten cute bakers hat shaking my good mood to much to resist. Come here for a second she calls out to me. Hold on is my reply. Set my pans in the oven turn around her body pins up mine. Gimme a kiss. So I do slip to the side and be rude let me go take a shower. I wash the flour out my hair take a moment and stare then brush my teeth. Wrapped in a towel stright to the kitchen gotta save my creation from bur... Continue»
Posted by MattheMonster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 168  |  
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The Italian Job 12

The Italian job 12
The day had come for the party at Roseanna’s house, the plan was to drive there on the Friday afternoon, have the party all day Saturday & Saturday night then make our way home on the Sunday.
I went to Yvonne and Maria’s home on the Friday lunch time and collected them along with Sonia then we all drove to Ravenna to the party venue, Roseanna was waiting at the door with Hazel in the background, the ladies had the tour of the house and we were shown to our rooms, dinner was to be a 7.00pm, quite a lot of guests had arrived already and Yvonne and Sonia were already popular ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 348  |  
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Tube Rendezvous

I check my watch: 10.31 perfect, I step onto the 3rd carriage of the tube at Oxford Circus, Central Line heading west. I check my mobile again, the text reads "10.31 Central line, 3rd carriage, OC, no undies ;) Bunty x"

I make my way to the corner of the packed tube, looking for the blonde haired woman, but no sign. At the next stop a sudden rush of people exiting and a new hoard entering. Suddenly I notice a shot of blonde hair moving towards me. The woman is close and has her back to me, she is dressed in a black jumper, black skirt, black stockings and a red jacket. I have a Gant shirt, ... Continue»
Posted by tallguy222 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 485  |  
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Road Trip

We had just left Savannah, Georgia, and were heading back north to Ft. Bragg, N.C. We were in my 68 Convertible Corvette, and Anya was always a horny b---h, when I started to play with her pussy, and she reached over and pulled my shorts down to my feet, and started to suck me. I was passing a panel van, when I looked over and saw this young driver looking at us and grinning, and giving me the thumbs up. I pulled her mini-skirt up around her waist, exposing her beautiful ass in a thong. Next thing I knew there were 2 more heads looking out the same window, with sh-t eating grins on their faces... Continue»
Posted by vince68 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 783  |  
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A goth´s good time

All my stories are true

2010, August 31
About 9:25 pm

This story is a rough prologue to
A dominate goth
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/41234.html
and
Vengeance is sweet
http://xhamster.com/user/Bea69/posts/55130.html

As always you can find the animated pictures in my profile

Despite is was the last day of august the temperatures once again shot up. I don't know the exact temperatures by today, but it was so hot that every sunbeam hurts. Therefore I was extremely eased it already had cooled down a bit due to the daytime. The sun already had sunk and a brisk wind blew. Fr... Continue»
Posted by Bea69 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 229  |  
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The Birth Of A Candy Bar

One PAYDAY, MR. GOODBAR wanted a BIT-O-HONEY. So he took Ms. HERSHEY behind the POWERHOUSE on the corner of CLARK and 5TH AVENUE. He let out a SNICKER and stuck his BUTTERFINGER up her KIT-KAT, causing a MILKY WAY. She screamed O'HENRY as she came all over his PETER PAUL and ZAGNUTS. After he busted a NUTRAGEOUS, she showered him with HERSHEY'S KISSES and told him he was better than the THREE MUSKETEERS. Soon, she was a bit CHUNKY and nine months later, she had BABYRUTH.... Continue»
Posted by The_Tongue_Fu_Master 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 116  |  
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How To Have Sex With a Friend

Seriously, who hasn’t met a friend who’s sexy and all that?

And how many of us haven’t wondered how to have sex with a friend?

It feels so good to be bad. It feels even better to cross that boundary and play dirty, doesn’t it?

Life in the fast lane couldn’t get any faster in these days of fast love and raging hormones. It’s hard to get over the blues of being single especially when everyone around is either madly in love, or physically in love.

If lovers can do it, why not friends? After all, friends do share everything lovers share, other than physical intimacy.

Sex with a frie... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 622  |  
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My girl friend sucked another man cock in frount o

Me and my girl friend which theres a photo of her on my profile.We were at a party and drinking heavely. A guy which we did not know at all was braging on how his wife sucks the best dick. So me of course d***k said really whip it out and I told my girl friend to suck his cock ! I couldnt beleave it but she droped rite to her knees and started sucking his cock in frount of 22 other men and 4 women! The guy blew his load in less then 1 minute all over her face and in her mouth. She showed everybody there the load in her mouth then swallowed his load of course then clean the rest off her face wi... Continue»
Posted by Richard234 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3481  |  
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Tom's accident

“Comfortable, Dad?” Karen asked as her father eased himself as best he could with both arms and a leg in plaster and a a face that looked like it had gone ten rounds with Audley Harrison.

“Yes, love,” Tom said. “Sorry to be dumped on you like this.”

“It’s not a problem, Honestly! If I can’t look after my old dad in his hour of need, what kind of a daughter am I?”

“A good one. You always have been. Especially when your mother went. I don’t know how I’d have coped.”

Karen bent over and gave him a kiss on the forehead.

“Well, you just take it easy and I’ll make you a coffee.”
... Continue»
Posted by samvimes 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 9744  |  
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First Time Chubby Chaser

This is a true story, my first time writing as well. Happened in the winter of 2011. Makes me laugh whenever I think about it, haven't told friends so I would like to share with someone lol.

It was a Saturday on a very cold, typical Alberta winter night. Roommate and I had just finished a long hitch of OT. Decided to unwind have some drinks at the house and head to a club. Usual time looking for women and hitting the drinks hard lol

Met a few nice ladies, added a few new contacts in the cell, but no action.
Left the club decided to walk away from the crowd in hopes of flagging a cab.
... Continue»
Posted by m-i-k-e 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2490  |  
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