Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 75

“wondering what he would do…”

“wondering what he would do…”

This post, inspired by a communication from a specific xhamster woman, is purely my fantasy, based upon a remarkably small number of private messages where she shared what she liked about my writing.

Chapter 1: Shake something at them...
SHE (starting from her perspective):
I can’t believe that I’m actually flying to Atlanta to check out this kinky “Emorymed” guy from xhamster (Wonder what his real name is?). What started as a passing curiosity, evolved to email exchanges, 'make me blush' photos, skype and now, finally, “in the flesh”. Although w... Continue»
Posted by emorymed 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
327
  |  
92%
  |  11

Who Owned Me -1

My life changed on a Friday, just after I'd turned eighteen and recently moved into a new life. That's how I liked to think of it. After leaving the modest village where I'd grown up, I'd moved to the modest town where I'd be attending community college. I wanted to be a graphic artist or something, I wasn't really sure, but I liked art and I was kind of good at it anyway. So those were the kind of classes I took while I worked part-time at Sears, dressing mannequins and putting up decorations and displays, stuff like that.

It wasn't a bad job, even if it only paid for my rent and just enou... Continue»
Posted by stif266 8 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
3558
  |  
92%
  |  1

NO BOYS ALLOWED

Mehek introduced me to her friends, showed me around her town, and helped me
settle in and acclimate to my new life. We were cousins by bl**d, but friends,
and pretty soon best friends by choice. We hung out together, had the same
group of friends, and shared secrets, everything that best girl friends do. She
even told me about the night she lost her virginity to her boyfriend. I must
admit that hearing her describe how it happened got me really sexually aroused,
and that night while Mehek was asl**p, I masturbated for the first time. I only
used my fingers and didn't even have an ... Continue»
Posted by thehornybabe 6 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
5483
  |  
92%
  |  18

Skinny dipping with mates GF

Unusually for me I had been working in Town on a project, it was one of those gorgeous late spring days with the sun shining hot and bright. Not at all like the bleak cold of our current dirge.

There was an unexpected knock at the door, when upon answering it I found Jo standing there. “Hello” she said, “I saw your car parked outside and thought I’d see how you are?” I explained that I was fine and invited her in to see what I was up to. She came and I said that I was surprised to see her as I had expected her to be at the Wedding.

I should maybe explain here that Jo was my best mate Jon... Continue»
Posted by appycam 1 month ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
7866
  |  
92%
  |  6

Little Piggy Series (the V.O. Segrams, RV)

Once Upon a time in a southern backwoods farming and mining community lived poor uneducated folk. My name is Tammy Sue, and I was a little 5'3 120 pound chubby girl with 38C udders that swelled to D's when I was impregnated. My hubby was from the North, and enjoyed by dutiful southern charm. He loved to give me assignments that would show my loyalty, and at the same time keep me entertained on the farm.

One night while I was stroking my husband’s penis in bed, he mentioned to me that one of his desires was to be with each of my female relatives. I laughed at first thinking ... Continue»
Posted by WombDweller 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
1514
  |  
92%
  |  8

Fireman's Carnival

Fireman's Carnival

by Kathy B.



"Mark! I'm over here!" I waved my hands wildly, trying to get my husband's
attention. It was useless though; he couldn't hear me over the noise of the
crowd and he hadn't noticed our booth when he walked past.

"Hey, lady. Can we get some pies here or not?" A sweaty, overweight man
stood beside three sweaty, underweight k**s. Each c***d clutched a dollar bill
in their dirty little fists.

I took a last look at Mark's back, disappearing behind the Ferris Wheel.
Oh, well, he'd keep looking until he found me. I'd get his attention t... Continue»
Posted by tzrlvr 2 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
904
  |  
92%
  |  6

Shy Indian Wife's Massage

We are an Indian couple from Kerala aged 34 and 38 yrs and married for seven years.

I had to go on a business trip which involved six hours of driving and my wife was with me in the car - After the meeeting we thought of visiting a nearby beach which is famous for Indian ayurvedic messages - I suggested that she go for a massage and she gave me a flat 'NO" for her.

I requested a massage for myself and the guy who mas massaging me was just around twenty years old. I suggested that my wife watch the massage as she had never seen it before.

As my massage was almost geeting over I insiste... Continue»
Posted by cuteb0y25 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
2501
  |  
92%
  |  2

Affair with a BBW

A Low Maintenance Affair with a BBW

Rylee always wore a baseball cap and this day was no exception. It was a standard part of his maintenance uniform and kept the sun out of his eyes as he traversed between buildings fixing everything from busted pipes to plaster dings. He was six feet tall, naturally tanned by his work outdoors, and had incredible green eyes the color of a pine tree in a rainstorm. Along with his baseball cap, he wore a tan polo shirt with the logo of the apartment building emblazoned on the left breast pocket, long Carhartt's workpants, sturdy steel capped boots, and a be... Continue»
Posted by gergawy 10 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
2491
  |  
92%

Fist visit to my sexy new female doctor

Yesterday I went to the doctor because i felt like i was peeing too much, i'm sitting in the waiting room and the doctor calls me, and she is the hottest woman i have ever seen. Late 20s/early 30s, gorgeous middle-eastern face, nice curvy lips, big dark eyes. She's very friendly with a thick Persian accent which i find very sexy. i explained to her my situation, and then she asked if i was sexually active, and i said no a bit too quickly, and she looked surprised for a second. She got me to pee in a jar, dipped the testing strip, and came over to show me the results. She got me to hold one end... Continue»
Posted by wet20 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
4157
  |  
91%
  |  1

Nudist and Swingers

We lived in Kentucky and frequented a nudist club in Southern Ohio. We met many interesting people while sunning ourselves. Talking and lots of smiles were common and being naked the talking and smiling were open and sincere.

We both noticed a couple that tickled our fancy (so to speak) and agreed that they might be fun to be with especially since there were lots of eye contact between us as a couple. We found later that their names were Danny and Kathy.

I loved the sauna...so while my lovely, curvy and sex driven wife was laying in the sun I opted for a visit into the sauna. I layed my... Continue»
Posted by buratino66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
983
  |  
91%
  |  2

The night of my LIFE!

My name is justin and this is my story. Well for starters I am a 5'7 male very strong build ( I play football) and I am apparently socially accepted.

It all happened on one random lonely warm night. Nothing out of place or in favor to clue a hint to this leading up to what would possibly be the most extreme not of my young life. I am a computer junky and its all I know (besides football). I live in an apartment building above my Aunt and her f****y of 5. Her second older daughter being the same age as me. Our entire lives we competed to see who was the best. We were always the same height.... Continue»
Posted by DrLoveMonkey 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
2072
  |  
91%
  |  4

Blackmailed

Vic lay on his bed, stretched out on his side, naked, his hard, throbbing cock in his hand. As he stroked himself harder and harder, faster and faster, his breathing growing hoarse and ragged, his gaze was locked inexorably upon the centerfold of the magazine before him.

Her name, according to the XXX magazine at any rate, was Honie and, despite the unusual spelling, Vic certainly thought that she was. Her body was lean and trim, smooth and petite, hairless and just lightly tanned. Her nipples were hard as she smiled coyly for the unimaginably lucky photographer who'd been privileged enough... Continue»
Posted by Elizabethann 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
3027
  |  
91%
  |  11

MY BIGGEST REGRET

FICTION OR TRUE YOU DECIDE,

My biggest regret.


My name Clair Andrews I’m 42 years of age and have a son of 16 years Kevin,
I have been married for over 20 years to Tom but we are currently separated due to my husband having an affair with one of our friend’s wife,
My son still see’s his father every week so we do talk when he come’s,

I think he would like us to get back together as he tells me the affair is now over,
I still cannot forgive him for what he has done but we are working on it,
My son would love us to get back together and be a f****y again.

Before the affair ou... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
2784
  |  
91%
  |  1

SPITFIRE

Shannon Blake couldn't help it. She simply had to talk herself
into trouble. This had been a problem for her growing up at home,
at school and later on, wherever she worked. She seemed to
crave confrontation and constantly found herself arguing with
others over the smallest of issues.

Of course, this was before she met Erik Powell.

The two had been dating less than a month when Shannon managed
to instigate a loud argument in the middle of a film they
were watching. Aggravated by Shannon's behavior and embarrassed
at being part of a public spectacle, Erik took his date by... Continue»
Posted by meatloaf90 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
543
  |  
91%
  |  2

Go Get Some (A Poem)

Just another poem...you don't have to take it to heart, though not a bad idea...

Go Get Some.

So, you’re looking for another rhyme,
Don’t know if I can do it this time,
I tried to think of something hot,
Something with a lusty plot,
Something you can read and wank,
But my mind simply came up blank,
So instead of reading some dirty poem,
While you’re sitting back at home,
Take a trip into the city,
Where you may find some real kitty,
Cause sex isn’t just to read about,
It’s something I can’t do without,
Cash your check when you get paid,
Go outside and actually ... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
179
  |  
91%
  |  2

My own personal nurse

Last week I came down with a small cold I caught at a time out with some friends. I decided it was best to stay home and rest my head. Leanne called like she normally does every morning to check up on me before class. I explained that I was sick with a cold. She asked to come by after class in the afternoon and I told her she can come over anytime.

Later that day Leanne arrives. We hug and kiss as she walks inside my apartment. Leanne cooked dinner for the both of us. She asked if she can stay the night to keep an eye on me since I was ill. I told her yes and she asked to change in my clot... Continue»
Posted by Johnny916 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
1503
  |  
91%

Sex Therapy-Florida Style

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex ther****t's office.

The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?"

The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"

The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.
Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry... Continue»
Posted by papa61 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
1103
  |  
91%
  |  4

Dracula's Forbidden Forest

Music that would be playing in the background is as follows: Marilyn Manson "Sweet Dreams", Korn "Freak on a leash", Three days Grace "a****l i have become" and NIN "Closer". This is the first annual haunted hay ride for adults only with only 2 wagonfulls of people per night so early reservations are strongly recommended! This is an erotic ride for the halloween season for very sexual people, such as myself, to dress up and participate in the roles you are given. During the heat of the moment some participants if they wish can swap partners and so on. You must sign a disclaimer form before... Continue»
Posted by jenny462 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
496
  |  
91%
  |  18

Sexy Housewife Affair with Young Boy

I work at a large bank in the accounting department and we had a new employee join us and she looked really nervous so I tried to befriend her and help her adjust and fit in with everyone. I took her around and introduced her to all my friends at work and had her join our hen fest at lunch to listen to everyone’s gossip and news. She seemed nice and had just moved to our city but she was kind of vague as to why she left home just saying that she needed to move from her parents because of personal reasons and this was the only job that paid enough for her to be on her own she could find. While ... Continue»
Posted by Amulya1 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
14253
  |  
91%

Big Boobs and a Bit of Luck

One of the many jobs I have had was at an electronics store which was pretty boring, except for the rare times when I would get to serve a hot busty customer.

I remember the first time that Sara walked in the door. It was a hot summers day, she was probably about 155cm (about 5'2" I think) she had a purple singlet top on, that barely could contain her bountiful breasts, with tight fitting 3/4 cutoff blue jeans and her short blonde hair pulled back in a pony tail. I'm a bit of a boob hound, so I was guessing a DD minimum but more likely an E cup.

As she walked in, I got a great look at h... Continue»
Posted by Luvboobs15 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
630
  |  
91%
  |  2