Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 74

The Dogs That Started It All

I knew about sex since I was about 13 but I only started experimenting when I was about 15, I’m 26 now. When I was 15 I began to “do a little research” I guess you could call it… I watched porn. I saw rather sexy woman get fucked rough and hard by men with huge dicks. I also watched as women played with their sexy little pussies and cum all over the place. Needless to say, I began to masturbate.
But, this story isn’t about all that. That was just a little background information. This story is about my dogs Buddy and Rocky.

Buddy:

When I was still “researching” sex when I was about 16, I... Continue»
Posted by qudduse 1 month ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Fucked By My Student



hi sexy guys the above pic is mine plz write ur dirty comments on my pic how i am looking without using simple words plz and also write how u want to fuck me like a brief sex story k and plz tribute my pic and send it to madhavimalika@yahoo.in



My name is Sunita Bajaj and I am from Vishakapatanam and I am married, 26 years old. I am fair in color with dimensions of 36-28-36. My husband loves me a lot and we enjoy our sexual life a lot. I wear sarees and expose a lot.

I always show my navel, back and cleavage.
... Continue»
Posted by madavi2 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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SPITFIRE

Shannon Blake couldn't help it. She simply had to talk herself
into trouble. This had been a problem for her growing up at home,
at school and later on, wherever she worked. She seemed to
crave confrontation and constantly found herself arguing with
others over the smallest of issues.

Of course, this was before she met Erik Powell.

The two had been dating less than a month when Shannon managed
to instigate a loud argument in the middle of a film they
were watching. Aggravated by Shannon's behavior and embarrassed
at being part of a public spectacle, Erik took his date by... Continue»
Posted by meatloaf90 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Go Get Some (A Poem)

Just another poem...you don't have to take it to heart, though not a bad idea...

Go Get Some.

So, you’re looking for another rhyme,
Don’t know if I can do it this time,
I tried to think of something hot,
Something with a lusty plot,
Something you can read and wank,
But my mind simply came up blank,
So instead of reading some dirty poem,
While you’re sitting back at home,
Take a trip into the city,
Where you may find some real kitty,
Cause sex isn’t just to read about,
It’s something I can’t do without,
Cash your check when you get paid,
Go outside and actually ... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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My own personal nurse

Last week I came down with a small cold I caught at a time out with some friends. I decided it was best to stay home and rest my head. Leanne called like she normally does every morning to check up on me before class. I explained that I was sick with a cold. She asked to come by after class in the afternoon and I told her she can come over anytime.

Later that day Leanne arrives. We hug and kiss as she walks inside my apartment. Leanne cooked dinner for the both of us. She asked if she can stay the night to keep an eye on me since I was ill. I told her yes and she asked to change in my clot... Continue»
Posted by Johnny916 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Sex Therapy-Florida Style

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex ther****t's office.

The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?"

The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"

The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.
Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dracula's Forbidden Forest

Music that would be playing in the background is as follows: Marilyn Manson "Sweet Dreams", Korn "Freak on a leash", Three days Grace "a****l i have become" and NIN "Closer". This is the first annual haunted hay ride for adults only with only 2 wagonfulls of people per night so early reservations are strongly recommended! This is an erotic ride for the halloween season for very sexual people, such as myself, to dress up and participate in the roles you are given. During the heat of the moment some participants if they wish can swap partners and so on. You must sign a disclaimer form before... Continue»
Posted by jenny462 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Carole’s hairy cunt and the massage

See the photos that go with this story at “Carole’s hairy cunt and the massage”

Since being with Keith (my husband) most of my sexual encounters have been with him in attendance and indeed filming the action or joining in.

However, some have occurred without him being there and Keith tolerates this as long as I tell him all the graphic details later and I let him act out the encounter afterwards. So a win, win for me!

One such occasion occurred a few years ago when we were at Cap d’Agde the French naturist resort.

I had suggested that I’d like a massage whilst we were on holiday a... Continue»
Posted by CaroleX 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The first time for a nerd like me

Hello all. This is the funny, but sexy story of my very first time. before starting i'd like to let you all to know that i was 14 when i first lost my virginity. and prior to my first time i had next to no idea about sex. i was raised kinda proper and didn't have any real knowledge of sex outside of a very small amount of porn. that and i was 5'6 so kinda tall for my age. OK on with the show!

It starts with around October. Heavily tired from both a long school day and long day of football practice i began to walk my way back home from the school. wearing the normal team jersey and some blac... Continue»
Posted by overlorddlz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Little Piggy Series (the V.O. Segrams, RV)

Once Upon a time in a southern backwoods farming and mining community lived poor uneducated folk. My name is Tammy Sue, and I was a little 5'3 120 pound chubby girl with 38C udders that swelled to D's when I was impregnated. My hubby was from the North, and enjoyed by dutiful southern charm. He loved to give me assignments that would show my loyalty, and at the same time keep me entertained on the farm.

One night while I was stroking my husband’s penis in bed, he mentioned to me that one of his desires was to be with each of my female relatives. I laughed at first thinking ... Continue»
Posted by WombDweller 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Shy Indian Wife's Massage

We are an Indian couple from Kerala aged 34 and 38 yrs and married for seven years.

I had to go on a business trip which involved six hours of driving and my wife was with me in the car - After the meeeting we thought of visiting a nearby beach which is famous for Indian ayurvedic messages - I suggested that she go for a massage and she gave me a flat 'NO" for her.

I requested a massage for myself and the guy who mas massaging me was just around twenty years old. I suggested that my wife watch the massage as she had never seen it before.

As my massage was almost geeting over I insiste... Continue»
Posted by cuteb0y25 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Exhibitionism in the airport

Let me start of by saying everything you are about to read is 100% factual they occurred 2 years ago to me personally and it is a deeply erotic memory for me.

So here I was completely out of my mind desperately staggering through the airport in Rome. About 5 hours beforehand I'd gotten d***k and swallowed a litre of cheap corked wine (not fun) and if I didn't have friends with me I wouldn't have made it through the front door. But with them half carrying me I made it to boarding where I had an hour to sober up.

Leaving my friends I practically collapsed into a stall in the airport toil... Continue»
Posted by guyginger 2 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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My first time with John

This is the true story about my first time with a guy. It happened about 8 years ago.


John and I had been friends since we were about 6 years old. We did just about everything together. We were, and still are, best friends. One evening we decided to go to the gym and work out. The place was just about empty. We had the place to ourselves for the most part. I wasn’t as into the work out as John was. I decided to call it quits and hit the showers. John decided to stay and lift some more.


Since the place was empty I was in the showers alone. I was thinking about the killer blowjob that ... Continue»
Posted by jock1982 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Joke..!!

A married couple is lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sl**p, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. As he’s reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special area. He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before returning to read his book.

The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and, assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement before going further, Gets up and starts stripping in front of him.

The husband is confused and asks, "Why are you taking off your clothes?"

His wife repl... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Theatrical......3

Theatrical ….3

I awoke with a start 2 hours later and quickly looked around, he was sitting in the chair in just his boxer shorts watching the sport, I sighed as I rested my head back down on the pillow, it had not been a dream, I really was with him but I also realised that the wine contributed to my collapse but I felt totally rested, I also realised that I was in the bed as he had covered me up in bed , I curled up in the bed happy to be with him and watched him, he turned and looked at me then came over then bent and kissed me, I felt so relaxed as I reached up and curled my arm aroun... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Working Holiday

Just back for a works tip to Spain, 11 days in a place i wont name as I dont want to give the game away, but I had a great time.

Last time I was there was a lads holiday 9 years ago, this time I ended up with a house to myself because the guy who was supposed to cover the job was planning on bringing his wife and k** so the house was booked, when he dropped out I said I would do it.

Ended up in a nice house with a little pool, was not too busy around there so no neighbors to complain. Good stuff.

Like I said I was there on a lds holiday years ago and had a bit of cunt (english & scott... Continue»
Posted by happy_wanking 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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The 12 Days of Christmas - The True story

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
DAY ONE:

Dearest Bob,
I went to the door today and the postman delivered
a partridge in a pear tree. What a thoroughly delightful gift.
I couldn't have been more surprised.
With deepest love and affection,
Violet



DAY TWO:

Dearest Bob,
Today the postman brought your very sweet gift.
Justimagine...two turtle doves!!
I'm delighted at your very thoughtful gift.
They are just too adorable.
My everlasting love,
Violet


DAY THREE:

My Dear Bob,
Oh! Aren't you the extravagant one!
Now I actually must protest.
I don't deserve ... Continue»
Posted by OlGeezer 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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My 4 inch dick story...

This post is about how, to some of you, size DOES matter…a lot! As you can see, I am at the other end of the spectrum at 4.5 inches. Does this bother me? Yes and no. Let me start at the beginning and I think you’ll see what I mean…

My first girlfriend was very devoted to me as a person but unfortunately she couldn’t really feel much when we made love. Over time since she knew what a high sex drive I had she would take dick and start jerking me off. After a couple of minutes she always said her arm was getting tired which meant that she wanted me to finish myself off. This became the norm af... Continue»
Posted by fourinches 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Are You Gay? Answer to the Gay Debate


7 Signs you're Gay

You fucking wish you were a real man... well just get over it because you never have been and you never will!
In fact, Ill bet you that you're actually gay... even if you dont want to be!!! haha - homo!

Okay seriously bitch, you need to be honest with this mini-quiz... you need to get over the denial and fear and when you know your should answer yes, just do it...
If you really want to know once and for all if you're a cock smoking queer, or not - then just be honest when you answer and then we will see... if you're a raging homo gay lord!

1. You have thought or... Continue»
Posted by faggitkiki 2 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Anathema Device










Anathama Device


Anathema returned to her class satisfied that she had got her own way yet again .

Anna was used to getting her own way. She dominated her older s****r Meg and her younger s****r
Janet, She even dominated her Mother Meg or so she imagined.

The telephone rang at Meg Browns house . Meg answered almost immediately .

It was Martin the Principal at Hope High School .
Martin White was the nephew of the bank manager who had owned the Mansion on the hill and had been the deputy Principal when Meg was at school.
No one knew except for ... Continue»
Posted by clearly 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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