Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 72

The first time for a nerd like me

Hello all. This is the funny, but sexy story of my very first time. before starting i'd like to let you all to know that i was 14 when i first lost my virginity. and prior to my first time i had next to no idea about sex. i was raised kinda proper and didn't have any real knowledge of sex outside of a very small amount of porn. that and i was 5'6 so kinda tall for my age. OK on with the show!

It starts with around October. Heavily tired from both a long school day and long day of football practice i began to walk my way back home from the school. wearing the normal team jersey and some blac... Continue»
Posted by overlorddlz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1530  |  
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Little Piggy Series (the V.O. Segrams, RV)

Once Upon a time in a southern backwoods farming and mining community lived poor uneducated folk. My name is Tammy Sue, and I was a little 5'3 120 pound chubby girl with 38C udders that swelled to D's when I was impregnated. My hubby was from the North, and enjoyed by dutiful southern charm. He loved to give me assignments that would show my loyalty, and at the same time keep me entertained on the farm.

One night while I was stroking my husband’s penis in bed, he mentioned to me that one of his desires was to be with each of my female relatives. I laughed at first thinking ... Continue»
Posted by WombDweller 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1473  |  
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Shy Indian Wife's Massage

We are an Indian couple from Kerala aged 34 and 38 yrs and married for seven years.

I had to go on a business trip which involved six hours of driving and my wife was with me in the car - After the meeeting we thought of visiting a nearby beach which is famous for Indian ayurvedic messages - I suggested that she go for a massage and she gave me a flat 'NO" for her.

I requested a massage for myself and the guy who mas massaging me was just around twenty years old. I suggested that my wife watch the massage as she had never seen it before.

As my massage was almost geeting over I insiste... Continue»
Posted by cuteb0y25 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2313  |  
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Exhibitionism in the airport

Let me start of by saying everything you are about to read is 100% factual they occurred 2 years ago to me personally and it is a deeply erotic memory for me.

So here I was completely out of my mind desperately staggering through the airport in Rome. About 5 hours beforehand I'd gotten d***k and swallowed a litre of cheap corked wine (not fun) and if I didn't have friends with me I wouldn't have made it through the front door. But with them half carrying me I made it to boarding where I had an hour to sober up.

Leaving my friends I practically collapsed into a stall in the airport toil... Continue»
Posted by guyginger 2 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1016  |  
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Joke..!!

A married couple is lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sl**p, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. As he’s reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special area. He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before returning to read his book.

The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and, assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement before going further, Gets up and starts stripping in front of him.

The husband is confused and asks, "Why are you taking off your clothes?"

His wife repl... Continue»
Posted by papa61 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1557  |  
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Theatrical......3

Theatrical ….3

I awoke with a start 2 hours later and quickly looked around, he was sitting in the chair in just his boxer shorts watching the sport, I sighed as I rested my head back down on the pillow, it had not been a dream, I really was with him but I also realised that the wine contributed to my collapse but I felt totally rested, I also realised that I was in the bed as he had covered me up in bed , I curled up in the bed happy to be with him and watched him, he turned and looked at me then came over then bent and kissed me, I felt so relaxed as I reached up and curled my arm aroun... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 249  |  
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Working Holiday

Just back for a works tip to Spain, 11 days in a place i wont name as I dont want to give the game away, but I had a great time.

Last time I was there was a lads holiday 9 years ago, this time I ended up with a house to myself because the guy who was supposed to cover the job was planning on bringing his wife and k** so the house was booked, when he dropped out I said I would do it.

Ended up in a nice house with a little pool, was not too busy around there so no neighbors to complain. Good stuff.

Like I said I was there on a lds holiday years ago and had a bit of cunt (english & scott... Continue»
Posted by happy_wanking 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 781  |  
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The 12 Days of Christmas - The True story

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS
DAY ONE:

Dearest Bob,
I went to the door today and the postman delivered
a partridge in a pear tree. What a thoroughly delightful gift.
I couldn't have been more surprised.
With deepest love and affection,
Violet



DAY TWO:

Dearest Bob,
Today the postman brought your very sweet gift.
Justimagine...two turtle doves!!
I'm delighted at your very thoughtful gift.
They are just too adorable.
My everlasting love,
Violet


DAY THREE:

My Dear Bob,
Oh! Aren't you the extravagant one!
Now I actually must protest.
I don't deserve ... Continue»
Posted by OlGeezer 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 355  |  
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Fucking my Buddy and his TEENAGE Daughter

I am over 50 and even though I'm in decent shape, I'm STILL over 50 and thought that I would never get another chance to fuck a young sweet teen again.

One day, a buddy of mine and I had just come back from a hunting trip and I dropped him off at his house. While there, I saw his young daughter for the first time since she was little and she had grown into a hot little thing with tiny tits, long legs and that sweet little face you see in high school all the time.

I spoke with her a bit while her dad poured a few drinks and just before I left, she gave me a big hug and a little kiss on
... Continue»
Posted by bifun4u 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 9258  |  
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The Absent-Minded Commuter

The Absent-Minded Traveller
I am a terribly forgetful person - let me give you an example. Yesterday I went to visit a friend - a beautiful friend, slim, yet with curves in all the right places - and we flirt, though nothing has happened between us … yet. I wanted her to notice how good I looked, so I made a special effort before I set off for her place. I put on a rather short, floral dress, and high heeled, strappy sandals. Then I sat in front of the mirror and watched myself as I pumped my clit hood till it was huge - all swollen and soft - rubbing against my thighs. To get to my friend’... Continue»
Posted by pinkpumper 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1726  |  
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My 4 inch dick story...

This post is about how, to some of you, size DOES matter…a lot! As you can see, I am at the other end of the spectrum at 4.5 inches. Does this bother me? Yes and no. Let me start at the beginning and I think you’ll see what I mean…

My first girlfriend was very devoted to me as a person but unfortunately she couldn’t really feel much when we made love. Over time since she knew what a high sex drive I had she would take dick and start jerking me off. After a couple of minutes she always said her arm was getting tired which meant that she wanted me to finish myself off. This became the norm af... Continue»
Posted by fourinches 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1151  |  
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Anathema Device










Anathama Device


Anathema returned to her class satisfied that she had got her own way yet again .

Anna was used to getting her own way. She dominated her older s****r Meg and her younger s****r
Janet, She even dominated her Mother Meg or so she imagined.

The telephone rang at Meg Browns house . Meg answered almost immediately .

It was Martin the Principal at Hope High School .
Martin White was the nephew of the bank manager who had owned the Mansion on the hill and had been the deputy Principal when Meg was at school.
No one knew except for ... Continue»
Posted by clearly 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1844  |  
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My foreign boyfriend.

This is a real experience guys, I had a boyfriend from London once and I spoke to him recently, we are no longer together because of the distance thing. We were on cam and everything, and I don't know how but we ended up talking about when we used to fuck... it was a bit embarrasssing because we don't talk about that shit anymore - it's the past. It really turned me on and I figured maybe it would be an interesting read.

It's not one of those erotic or dirty normal stories, it may be a bit boring or whatever but anyway.. Read on if you got the time - maybe it will make ... Continue»
Posted by xxxsarah69xxx 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 625  |  
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CAUGHT AND PUNISHED !!!!!!

Right i thought, ill get this last job sorted then race home and have the house to myself for an hour or so before the wife gets in. Both the k**s are away so i thought ill enjoy some sexy time alone. I rushed home and swung the van into the first space i could find. When i jumped out my freshly shaven cock was already starting to pulsate as i thought about my beautiful wives sexy panties in the wash basket just waiting to be explored.

I kicked of my shoes and dropped my trousers releasing my massive hard throbbing cock, and went upstairs. I reached into the wash basket and found 3 pairs o... Continue»
Posted by himNher 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 643  |  
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a new song for sailors

Now that women are allowed in the Navy we have to change that old song...

What can you do with a d***ken sailor,
what can you do with a sexy sailor ?
what can you do with a female sailor early in the morning ?

pull her panties down and spank her white ass,
pull her panties down and spank her black ass,
pull her panties down and spank her tight ass, till she cries Ahoy.

What can you do with a d***ken sailor,
what can you do with a sexy sailor ?
what can you do with a female sailor early in the morning ?

tie her tits up with an old rope,
tie her tits up with a new rope,
tie h... Continue»
Posted by VictorL4fun 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 691  |  
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My first time with John

This is the true story about my first time with a guy. It happened about 8 years ago.


John and I had been friends since we were about 6 years old. We did just about everything together. We were, and still are, best friends. One evening we decided to go to the gym and work out. The place was just about empty. We had the place to ourselves for the most part. I wasn’t as into the work out as John was. I decided to call it quits and hit the showers. John decided to stay and lift some more.


Since the place was empty I was in the showers alone. I was thinking about the killer blowjob that ... Continue»
Posted by jock1982 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 5437  |  
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Fist visit to my sexy new female doctor

Yesterday I went to the doctor because i felt like i was peeing too much, i'm sitting in the waiting room and the doctor calls me, and she is the hottest woman i have ever seen. Late 20s/early 30s, gorgeous middle-eastern face, nice curvy lips, big dark eyes. She's very friendly with a thick Persian accent which i find very sexy. i explained to her my situation, and then she asked if i was sexually active, and i said no a bit too quickly, and she looked surprised for a second. She got me to pee in a jar, dipped the testing strip, and came over to show me the results. She got me to hold one end... Continue»
Posted by wet20 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales  |  Views: 4152  |  
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The night of my LIFE!

My name is justin and this is my story. Well for starters I am a 5'7 male very strong build ( I play football) and I am apparently socially accepted.

It all happened on one random lonely warm night. Nothing out of place or in favor to clue a hint to this leading up to what would possibly be the most extreme not of my young life. I am a computer junky and its all I know (besides football). I live in an apartment building above my Aunt and her f****y of 5. Her second older daughter being the same age as me. Our entire lives we competed to see who was the best. We were always the same height.... Continue»
Posted by DrLoveMonkey 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 2065  |  
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Seducing & Fucking My Maid


I was with my cousin b*****r who just passed a comment that if he was in my place he would have had her by now. It was then I looked at her in that sense, she was mopping the floor facing us kneeling down. Her saree across her bosom was a little down revealing her cleavage. I looked at her but didn't have any thoughts about the issue. After a few days everybody left and only our f****y was remaining. The next few days were nice as we had our first s****r-in-law (bhabhi) and talked about a lot of things.

But in these days every time Kavitha was mopping the floor I used to peep at her cle... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 962  |  
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Brief sex 06 he is In the next room

Brief sex 06

In the next room.



In principle, I do not like dredging or yield to the advances of women friends. But sometimes circumstances play tricks on us. Her name was Sophie, it was the wife of a friend with whom I had made it part of my studies. Say that Sophie had left me indifferent, no, it would be wrong. I always watched this chick with a lot of desire.

I was happy for my friend Andrew, but hey, be respectful does not prevent having eyes. The plastic Sophie approached perfection. Tall brunette with long hair, her skin was golden tan always perfect. His oval face her ... Continue»
Posted by CinquantNERF 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 453  |  
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