Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 71

The Librarian

This story isn't mine, but a story that she told me a while back.

The public library had seen many people pass through its glorious marbled halls throughout the years. The people came and went. They were of all shapes, sizes, colors, and ages. Some were dreading their time among the rows and rows of books, and others stayed for hours, relaxing in the peace and quiet of the adult section on the second floor.

Isabelle worked as a full-time librarian. The monotony of stacking books and selling those that were too worn to be borrowed again never discontented her. She was the typical ... Continue»
Posted by candyrockhard 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 10097  |  
88%
  |  13

The Coleman Pop-Up Camper Money Maker

Once Upon a time in a soutern backwood farming and mining community lived poor uneducated folk. I grew up as most young ladies do minding my parents, and taking those sticky tractor rides with paw, as he plowed the fields, and planted his seeds in the tiny rows. It always put a smile on his face as well as mine to be such a special helper. Keeping the field weeded was always a chore.

Then the city over opened a water park, and of course they charged money. So my b*****r came up with the idea that he would have his firends cum over to the trailer after they got done doing their chores. ... Continue»
Posted by WombDweller 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 2717  |  
88%
  |  21

Hot Sex

We had spicy egg fried rice for dinner last night, chef sat in the living room chopping the veg and chillies ready for the rice that was sat steaming on the hob. Fast forward ten minutes to me being accosted on the stairs on route for a quick pre dinner bath. Sex on the stairs is always a good thing, there's something wonderfully naughty about having sex in a none sex designated zone .He ripped my jeans off, slammed me down on my back and slid his cock straight up inside me. If we had left it there we would have been fine. However sexy genius here decided it would be fun to taste herself ... Continue»
Posted by duggie666 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 627  |  
88%
  |  4

The Creation of a Pussy

Seven wise men with knowledge so fine,
created a pussy to their design.
First was a butcher,
with smart wit,
using a knife,
he gave it a slit,
Second was a carpenter,
strong and bold,
with a hammer and chisel,
he gave it a hole,
Third was a tailor,
tall and thin,
by using red velvet,
he lined it within,
Fourth was a hunter,
short and stout,
with a piece of fox fur,
he lined it without,
Fifth was a fisherman,
nasty as hell,
threw in a fish and gave it a smell,
Sixth was a preacher,
whose name was McGee,
he touched it and blessed it,
and said it co... Continue»
Posted by papa61 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 318  |  
88%
  |  6

Jenny and Tanya in old Amsterdam - last part

With Jenny in c*** from too many orgasms, Pete tied up tough Tanya on his wooden low table and trashed her properly as well. During coming she only beeped:
"Beep, Pete Peterson, peep, ... I pee ... beep ...".

Seeing her peeing Pete doubled his efforts. She shouted so loud that ol´ Pete collapsed ... but Jenny woke up!

Jenny untied Tanya. Kicked Pete awake. Told the old man: "More!"
And she presented him his arms. Poor Pete was left without defense.

He accepted his paddle and the Polish whip, called "cat-o-nine tails" in English - in Polish "na ostry seks" and came back to duty ... B... Continue»
Posted by petdyke 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 460  |  
88%
  |  4

Fourth of July Slumber Party

This Fourth of July started out just like any other. Little did I know that this day would change my life forever. I went over to my boyfriend's house in the middle of the afternoon for the f****y picnic. The plan was for me to watch fireworks with Danny, my boyfriend, and his f****y and then take his s****r, Whitney, to their aunt's house.

The day went exactly as planned. We went to Danny's grandparents' house for dinner, then to the park to watch fireworks. After fireworks, I gave Danny a kiss goodbye then Whitney and I drove to their aunt's house.

"Want to come up and have a few dri... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 883  |  
88%
  |  2

Helping Daughter In law

This is a story my friend secretly told me
Iam a young housewife married a year ago and have given birth to a baby about two months old now and taying with my FIL (father in law) and hubby is working in the states. MIL (mother in law) is no more and so alone with FIL who takes care of every need as for my looks; I am quite pretty and endowed with good sexy features. usually wear saree below my navel well wrapped up to enhance my sexiness along with a well fitted blouse.
Mostly sleeveless and with front and back deep cut to expose my full and firm boobs and clevage. These days my boobs are fu... Continue»
Posted by sarosh 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1184  |  
88%

Journey from New Delhi to Mumbai

This incident happened with me on my journey from New Delhi to Mumbai via Rajdhani Express 2 months back,I was travelling alone by IInd A/c and it was just 5 minutes for the train to leave and still in my cabin (which had 3 other seats vaccant) no other passenger had come and i had almost thought that I would be all alone in the cabin till Mumbai and got engrossed in reading a magazine and just as the train was to depart a sweet voice called out her seat number and was trying to locate it by inquiring from the attendant present in the coach, lucky me it was in my cabin and i did become a littl... Continue»
Posted by sexyboydelhi61 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 270  |  
88%

A Short Story

A Short Story
in play format. (Originally written 23 Feb 2006)




Interior - waiting room of surgery. A voice over the P.A announces for Mrs Allott to enter Dr. R Don’s room.

Mrs Allott: Hello Dr.

Dr. Don: Good morning, Mrs Allott, what can I do for you? how’s Mr Allott?

Mrs Allott: He’s fine. Dr, I’m here about my pussy.

Dr. Don: And what is the problem with it?

Mrs Allott: It keeps itching.

Dr. Don: Well, you better get it out and I’ll take a look at it.

Mrs Allott gets it out and Dr. Don proceeds to take a good look at it.

Dr. Don: You have a lovely pussy,
... Continue»
Posted by suavisdulcis 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 636  |  
88%
  |  1

The Torture

You are home alone. You find yourself looking around to determine what next to do. Wow, it’s been so long since you had the house to yourself. You sit on the couch thinking, “Hmmm what to do?” You end up falling asl**p on the couch. Sweet dreams begin.
In your dreams you smell lavender and you get this feeling that someone is with you, but who? This dream is peaceful and you find yourself relaxing. This person with you has soft hands, you think to yourself, “don’t let this dream stop it’s been too long since someone has made me comfortable”. Your entire body has been gently massag... Continue»
Posted by Feistybabe63 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 416  |  
88%
  |  5

My Girlfriends has a creampie pussy for the night.

Ceri my sexy saucy girlfriend was having a night out with the girls. It had been a while since she has been out and she was looking forward to it. As in my previous story Ceri like’s to flirt around with my mates and other lads she finds hot. She love’s being touched up and I don’t mind her having a bit of fun now and again. We had a steaming threesome with a male college friend of mine a few years ago. Since then our sex life has been pretty normal.

My good friend Dave was staying over our house to keep me company while she was out for the night. We had a load of beers in and were having a... Continue»
Posted by danny227 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2002  |  
88%
  |  2

The best class session. (continue)

We couldn't wait for the class to end. Even after cumming boy was I still horny. I wanted Jane really bad. She wasn't particularly good looking but there was smth in her that made a guy crazy. Maybe the way that she handled herself, maybe her long lingering looks. I don't know, but she sure as hell made every guy fantasize about her. There were a few times where I remember picturing her naked while pleasuring myself. But even in my wildest dreams I had never imagined all this to happen.
Finally the class ended and the professor decided to let us go. I immediately turned towards her and said:... Continue»
Posted by kujdes_shishen 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1277  |  
88%
  |  1

MY WIFE LOVES TO TEASE

MY WIFE LOVES TO TEASE

Hi my names Tom and my wife’s name is Amanda we have been married for 6 year’s,
We both decided on not having any c***dren as we both have very good jobs plus my wife always said that she never wanted to ruin her figure by having k**s,
So we decided that we would have the very best things in life together nice car’s a big house and plenty of holidays,

My wife has always been a tease when around other men she has to work and socialize with them so it’s inevitable that she will get hit on by other men from time to time,

As for myself I work in the city as a inve... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 3 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1514  |  
88%

Ship Wrecked


Off the coast of Africa it was a stormy dark night. The sailing ship about a mile out at sea was being battered by the violent rain and thunder storm. The mast was torn from the ship and fell overboard and the ship took on water from waves coming over it's sides and draining down the hatches filling the hull of the vessel. The ship was rocked and slammed back and forth breaking apart from the torrid storm and sank to the bottom of the ocean.
Out of the 50 man crew only 2 survived and washed up on the sandy beach. As the storm subsided and the sun rose it became a nice calm day. The 2 men ... Continue»
Posted by Warwood 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1129  |  
88%
  |  5

SEX IN KUALA LUMPUR

I would like to share my sex enjoyment in Malaysia. I was travelling to Kuala Lumpur for Technical meeting. I arrived Kl at 9apm and went from airport to my hotel. It was about 11pm. I was tired and was looking forward to rest as soon as room was given. The receptionist was charming, sexy with very good figure. She smiled and welcome me. The room was given and I started to move to my room. She requested me to wait as someone will accompany me to my room with my luggage. As there was no bell boy around she accompanied me. She briefed me about the facilities in the room and then left. I rested ... Continue»
Posted by fukkerguy 7 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3735  |  
88%
  |  2

The first time ( a meeting )

This is a true - ish story, but the names have been changed to protect the individuals.


His wife didn't understand him, she was too vanilla and he hated it. He wanted more passion, more excitement and he knew he was never going to get that at home. John had found something to keep himself, or his hands occupied too. I'm not sure, maybe he wanted to feel more wanted.
The sex site he had found had great video's on it, plenty of choice, and a world away from anything he had ever experienced ever.
John and Sara had mutual friends and had started dating, and as one by one their friends go... Continue»
Posted by redhead123 6 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 420  |  
88%
  |  1

Little Johnny and Grandad.

Little Johnny was in the chemist with his grandad who was getting some medication for himself. He told Johnny that it’s going to take about ten minutes to fill out and he was not to tough anything but only look around. The ten year old Johnny found something in the shop that he knew all about and thought he would have some fun with the old man by trying to embarrass him.
“Grandad, quick come here.” “What Johnny what?” asked grandad. Johnny pointed to a shelf and asked, “what are they grandad.”
Grandad saw what it was and knew what Johnny was trying to do and started smiling at him.
“Well J... Continue»
Posted by royby 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 999  |  
87%
  |  6

Small dick laughed at by 2 nurses

A friend of mine is a doctor and as part of her training she did a stint in the sexual health wing of the hospital she was working in. She is a very game girl constantly regaling us with tales of funny medical incidents. She told me about games she and her colleagues played to keep themselves amused and spirits high while working in quite a gritty environment.

She said they had a hilarious time asking really intimate questions because people would answer 100% honestly (very eye opening she said).. other guys would treat it like counselling and the moment the door shut on the examination r... Continue»
Posted by peteash 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 2858  |  
87%
  |  10

Another Vacation

Have you ever had that friend that you imagine what they look like naked? Well my s****r's mother-in-law is a woman I wanted to see naked. She is 62 years of sexy, soft silky legs, reddish brown curly hair, nipples that poke your eyes out with pleasure. As we spend Labor Day weekend at a Resort. Relaxing in the indoor water park, watching her float on the lazy river all spread out on a tub. OH... how I like to feast on that camel toe, she was sporting. I had to get a tub and float on my stomach and catch up to her as she floats on the back side through a tunnel. She had her back to me as I pad... Continue»
Posted by Gehld 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1183  |  
87%
  |  2

COCONUT CREAM


When I was twenty-five, I had a job as the manager of a frozen
yogurt store in San Diego. I was often playfully teased by one
of my employees, Michelle, a nineteen year old sprite with a nice
full figure. She liked to jump on my back and mess up my hair.
I'd joked many times about putting her across my knee, but I was
only bluffing. It became kind of an inside thing between us.

"Watch out for Alex!" She once warned a new female employee.
"He'll take you to the woodshed!"

One evening we were closing the store and Michelle was hurrying
because she was going out with some friends l... Continue»
Posted by meatloaf90 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 923  |  
87%
  |  5