Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 69

Wasted Beauty

So i was walking home from a house party with my friend quite recently and as we was about to turn down the alleyway towards our area of residence we noticed two women on the side of the road just up from the alleyway. Being extremely pissed we thought it would be a great idea to as a laugh ask them to follow us. We walked into the alleyway only to turn round and see both of them slowly following us, we knew ful well what they was, the scum of the sex industry, street hookers addicted to some sort of d**g. Nevertheless in our cuurrent state we found the situation hilarious and shouted up to th... Continue»
Posted by Love_To_Eat_Pussy 5 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Headteacher's Punishment


As I lay on the cold hard pale blue tiled floor of the school's store-room, tied up helplessly by Kaylee and her mean little gang, with the humiliating 'Fart in My Face' sign she left by my head, I was visited and farted on by lots of the school teachers. Lucky for me, they were only the female teachers. I smelt lots of flavourful womanly farts that day, and it was finally coming towards the end of the school day.

The end of my embarrassing torture, or so I thought...

The very last visitor came into the store-room.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!" The old cow yelled. It was my headte... Continue»
Posted by azid619 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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1st Time I had sex! - True Story

I thought I would give another story for everyone. It's kinda a short story but I enjoyed every minute of it. Once again, THIS IS TRUE! I love reading true encounters and I love telling you about mine...

My high school sweetheart and I came back from a party at her friends house. Since there was some alcohol at the party she decided to partake in a beverage or two. As we entered her house she stops me and starts stroking me in the foyer. Mind you, it's around 11:30pm - her curfew - and usually her parents kinda keep a keen ear to her coming home. So I am nervous because all her paren... Continue»
Posted by ffjester 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Emma’s Joy Stick

She sucked on his cock with relish across the gear stick separating the two front seats. Knowing the more danger they were both in the harder he would cum, Emma sucked him harder with gusto and worked the throbbing rock-hard ‘stick’ in her mouth, her tongue slithered and pressed every which way inside. His hands were busy changing gears and steering the wheel, concentrated hard on keeping the car on the road and not the ditch on the side. Every pothole Andrew couldn’t avoid jolted his cock deep into Emma’s mouth, hit the back of the throat every so often.

Now that the blow job keeps both oc... Continue»
Posted by MinxGirl 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Remember when (cousin story)

During a party last week, I had a chance to catch up with one of my younger cousins. We used to be so close but with everyone going their own separate ways, we all kind of grew apart. She was the closest in age with me and we were pretty close since we liked messing with our much younger cousins.

We talked about the games we used to play and how much fun it was back in those days. With everyone hanging out in the living room, I asked my cousin if she wanted to go to my room (in the basement) and have a drink with me. I went first and turn the tv on and got a couple of beers from the fridge.... Continue»
Posted by dirtyauthor 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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My girfriends mother part2

My girlfriend’s mother ……part 2

You remember that in the first part I was going out with a girl called Gillian and that I had fucked both her mother and her aunt in a session of debauchery that lasted all afternoon, if you have not read it I suggest you read it first because this second part is not as long but has a lot of strong connections to the first apart from the link of Gillian and her mother.

I made regular visits to the house to service the two ladies, Gillian’s mum had to be on a Wednesday afternoon because of her working in the shop and Wednesday was the only day she got off a... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Peeping tom

Last week I was ready for a girls nite out with my best girlfriend but once again her husband decided to ruin it all by getting sick so she opted to stay home and take care of him instead:(((. So all alone and nothing to do I got on xhamster and started watching a little bit'o'porn playing with my increasingly wet pussy. Well about 10 or 15 minutes into taking care of myself I realized that i had forgotten to draw my shades shut....oops..... When I looked out I could see into my neighbors window and there he was staring right into my window. Cock in hand an just. Pulling away at it. Well i ... Continue»
Posted by torreyann 5 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Italian job

The Italian job.

For many years I have worked abroad installing plant and equipment around the world, one such job was situated in a small village in Italy, I will not give the name to protect the innocent etc.
My lunch was normally a sandwich and a beer prepared by one of the factory ladies which I normally ate beside the machines that I was installing, there were a couple of people in the factory who could speak a few words of English but the company had got a young girl the daughter of one of the women in the factory who spoke good English to interpret for me, when working abroad I try ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Breakup sex with my girlfriends s****r

The day was not starting out very well for me. As I walked out to my car I found a note on the windshield from my girlfriend Sheila. In her note she said she was breaking up with me. She didn't give a reason, just that we were through and she was moving on. This upset me quite a bit and I couldn't imagine what could have possibly brought this on. In hopes of getting an answer and maybe setting things right again I jumped in my car and headed for her house. As I drove I tried to think it through, Sheila and I had been together for nearly a year, and we always did things together going out to ea... Continue»
Posted by querico44 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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A new found friend.

Now that I have known you good folks for a while, let me introduce to you my best friend - CAN YOU GUESS,WHO HE IS? Apparently we first meet shortly after my birth, but I must admit, that I really did not pay much attention to our relationship for the first 7-8 years of my life. Now at some point in time shortly after my 8th birthday, our relationship took to turn for the better. I started to realize, that my friend could actually be interesting company and I started to grow really fond of him. I started to play with him from time to time and soon realized, that with proper attention and a bit... Continue»
Posted by Mads69 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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I love a girl who loves to suck dick! (True story)

This is my first story on here...

Please comment and tell me about similar events. (if you want more info i will be happy to inbox and share)

So i been on a social site on my cell for about 4 years now called moco. I have had all types of women of there from big to small, ugly to fine, short to tall. That damn moco have got me more ass than any other site.
So im in the "near me" chat room to holla at the local chicks around a month ago and this girl has "my lips your dick" on a pic of her's and licking her lips. So i shot at her "you must really like sucking dick..." she like " hell yea... Continue»
Posted by DFreaky1 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Hot Summer Camp - Part 3

Hot Summer Camp Part 3

After hot day at summer camp I headed to the showers to clean up. While soaping up I looked around and with no one around I started to stroke my cock. As I started to get hard I grabbed my balls. I felt something on the underside and stopped jacking off then lifted my balls and notice a black insect on my balls. I pinched and pulled but the black spec but it would not come off. I did not know what to do I had a tick stuck to my balls. I decided I needed to get dressed and go to the nurses office.

As I walked over to the nurses cabin I was very nervous and did not k... Continue»
Posted by sledz 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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A Visit to Beverlee's Hillls

Working in the consumer electronics industry since the 1980’s I would go to Las Vegas every January for the CES show. I worked for a company that always had us stay at the Sands Casino and Convention center, which happened to be the same place the Adult Entertainment Expo was held, running concurrent to the CES show. This is a true story.

This afforded many of us the opportunity to meet various porn stars who stayed at the same hotel. We would also slip into their expo and, meet stars and collect autographs. Since I started doing this in the ‘80s, I met actors and actre... Continue»
Posted by nvision 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Audition 2

The Audition Part 2 "Ready Jane"


"Pull down your panties and set them beside you on the floor." Bella ordered

She then had me stand by the biggest of the two beds where she unbuttoned the top part of my dress. Bella fixed it so you could see my bra but not enough
so you could tell my breasts were fake. Next she hoisted up the bottom of the dress so my penis was visable. With all this touching going on from such a pretty lady it was already getting longer and harder by the millisecond.

***********************************************************************... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  
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xhamster community news

It was quite a surprise when we realised that
Tina was actually ChristineAnger. The photo that
gave it away was one on a BDSM series that she
uploaded a few weeks ago. Her face was hidden
behind her long auburn hair and a blindfold and
ball gag. Her Arms stretched wide and high in
a restraining frame. And her body covered in
deep weals from a vicious whipping she had just
received. But the tattoo was unmistakable, The
letter O with a naked bound girl circled by a whip.
I called Sue over and she was a bit shocked, "Oh, Tina
is a naughty girl" This led us to look more clos... Continue»
Posted by celcus 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Tight Huh?

A man picks up a hooker and tells her that he wants to see a sample of what he might get before he spends his hard earned money. The slut, feeling very confident spreads her legs and says, "Put your hand all the way in," which the man does.

Impressed, the man is ready to plunk down the cash when she says, "Put your other hand all the way in too." Once both his hands are all the way in she says, "Now spread your hands apart." As the man attempts to spread his hands apart she says proudly, "Tight Huh?"... Continue»
Posted by berndog24 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 10

Dear Dirty Diary,

A week had passed and Doug announced the completion of our new bed. I checked out all its clothing drawers, the sliding compartments in the headboard and its bed linen bin at its foot. I ran my fingers all over its satin-finished pine and had to admit it was really handsome. My husband had done a beautiful job, but I was concerned with how we’d transport it to Quebec. He told me it was all assembled with deck screws and could be easily broken down into pieces. He said the drawers, filled with all our clothing and bedding could be stacked on top of the framework pieces.... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 12

Dear Dirty Diary,

My darling husband returned today after his five day, late September fishing trip to Schooner Lake. After thorough questioning it turned out he’d gotten a little apprehensive being all alone up there amongst the wailing loons and spirits of dead Algonquin Indians. He swears there’s some kind of energy around the fire pit on the island that spooks him. So he drove back down to the condo to visit the k**s. On the way down from Plevna, he went to a Saturday night concert at Peterborough and saw Lisa Brokop perform. I was so pissed, but when he pulled out a signed copy ... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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His Majesty

When flaccidly resting his mock impotence is taken for granted, lack of excitement showing in his diminished size. Where does his mass disappear to? He looks peaceful lying there silent, patient, waiting for a feeling that he is needed or some sign of interest from a female. Until then he will lie restfully limp.
Then suddenly, as if to show that he is alive, he wakes. Rising tall and straight out of the surroundings. No slow waking, no delay. He springs to life. Nothing to everything in an instant. His size increases to double its proportion immediately.
His head, slightly larger than th... Continue»
Posted by Testdriver 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Valentines

You know I'm going to say what every single person out there is thinking but lack the testicular fortitude to say. I fucking hate Valentines Day. I'm not even sure if I hate it worse when I'm single or when I'm in a relationship. I mean sure when I'm in single I have to look around at all the happy couples, I have to watch girls go crazy as they get flowers delivered to the office. I have to watch guys nervously make last second arrangements and of course I have to face the fact that everybody but me is getting some goddamn pussy. If I'm in a relationship I'm just one of those guys scrambling ... Continue»
Posted by pornofiend 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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