Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 65

My Riri's Massage

My lovely wife Riry runs her own business as a massage ther****t.
One of the big differences between her and most of her colleagues is
that she was formerly a physical ther****t at a large hospital. Due
to her training as a P.T. she has an intimate knowledge of the human
body. She is a complete professional and is very dedicated to her
clients, always going that extra mile to help them with their
physical needs.

Also lucky for me she is a gorgeous woman. At 38 years of age she
is still very firm due to her dedication to aerobics and good diet.
She has chesnut brown hair which she ... Continue»
Posted by NicoNicoNico 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1226  |  
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A tube full of custard

"I wish they wouldn't fucking do that."

"What's the problem?"

"The video..."

"Yeah... so?"

"I just hate when they do that."

"You seemed to be getting well into it."

"I was! The women were gorgeous and the guy was hot. Some of the things there were pretty wild. But I hate it when they have a really good, steamy scene going, everybody's enjoying themselves, and then they end it as soon as the guy cums."

"You lost me..."

"Were we watching the same video?"

"Well... I was watching you quite a bit too..."

"Don't get cheeky... seriously! Is that where the male mind goes?... Continue»
Posted by mustbtuesday 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 694  |  
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My Horse

The year I turned 16 was a spectacular one, my parents were both partners in a growing law firm down in Tennesee and were acquiring a steady flow of new customers. I had been attending an all girl’s private school, complete with a tacky white blouse, navy checkered skirt and ridiculous white stockings and loafers, at least they were expensive. However the uniform was built for girls, and I was not one. By 16 years of age I already had a round pair of double D breast with what I considered dainty nipples at their centers. I was tall enough at 5’8” weighing in at only 120 lbs and was pleased wit... Continue»
Posted by drew1207 9 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 7833  |  
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The dangers of Naughty Skyping

'What was I thinking, fucking stupid cow'. Yes I am talking about me, I walked into it, eyes wide closed, as the saying goes, but what fuck, sit back and let me tell you and see what you think, I promise I will be open, honest, and get right down into the knitty gritty, I wont miss anything out, then you will see just how much of a slut I am.
I was home while my husband was away on a job on an oil rig in India, we had been separated for five weeks and he was due home the following week, but had just informed me by email, he might be delayed as finding men were getting difficult so we would ha... Continue»
Posted by MarieL 2 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1945  |  
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Syd and Meg (fantasies do come true)

SALLLLL! , IMMM HOOMEEEE!" the loud shrieking voice shattered the silence of quiet Saturday afternoon. Meg slammed the door and trotted across the living room in her open toe high heels, unloading an assortment of expensive looking shopping bags. "Thats funny... heyyyy! is anyone home?" her voice boomed up the stairs into the second floor rooms disrupting her 16 year old son from his daily masturbation rituals. He lay naked on his bed trying to block out her loud cries stroking his young cock. ( shut up.. will ya) he thought starting to get frustrated with her questions interrupting his tango ... Continue»
Posted by Johnnytames69 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1481  |  
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Kitten In Heat

(Stepmother goes wild for her brash 19-year-old stepson)

I.
It was 6 a.m. and Kitty was down in the kitchen making eggs. Her usual uptight mannerisms, developed over the course of a two-year marriage to man that resembled a dopey eyed sloth, were suddenly being replaced with an easy grace as she shuffled around the kitchen.

Her full c-cup chest shifted comfortably in a small blue baby t-shirt as she wiggled her hips every so often to a happy beat that she hummed to herself.

Katherine, Kitty to her close friends, cracked three delicate white eggs and dropped the syrupy contents into a... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1163  |  
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teasing mr kavanagh

Well what a day sun was shining for a change here in Ireland so my friend Amy and I took full advantage.
we wer going to go the beach but started talking about our tans and how much we hate tanlines and how my garden had high bushes so was out of view of all the houses bar my next door neighbour mr kavanagh.
we decided we would opt out of the beach and go topless out the back garden intead,nobody would be home till after 6 and mr kavanagh usually works during the day too so we thought why not lets go for it.
we were listening to music and tanning ourselves so we didnt hear any cars pull up ... Continue»
Posted by yoursnow 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1194  |  
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Dating leads to Fun with neighbour

Hello Guys and Girls I’m Naren 23 years old from Chennai. I am a student. Well I don't like to praise my own personality by my own words but my friends opinion about my personality is that Dude, you can impress any female of this world whether married or unmarried, whether sound character or unsound by your personality with in no time.
I am here to narrate the best encounter of my life. I am eagerly waiting for the response and suggestions of my story readers and readers post your feedback or If you need any help you can mail me on chennainareshk@gmail.com
It was summer vacation. I was alone... Continue»
Posted by matterboy 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 801  |  
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honeymoon

A mother had 3 daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because mom was a bit worried about how their sex lives would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on how marital sex felt.

The first girl sent a card from Hawaii two days after the wedding. The card said nothing but "Nescafe." Mom was puzzled at first, but then went to the kitchen and got out the Nescafe jar. It said: "Good till the last drop." Mom blushed, but was pleased for her daughter.

The second girl sent the card from Vermont a week after th... Continue»
Posted by bluechaser31 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 3275  |  
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Mothers milk

Mothers milk

Roby had just turned sixteen when this happened. He didn’t know what was next? He quickly was making his way down the hall to his room. He lay on his bed, butterflies churning in his stomach. He really wasn’t sure what was going on, but his body was telling him something. For the first time he had seen his mother not in the way he always had growing up, but in a much different way. He meant she aroused him. Yeah, he was sexually excited. He began to wonder if there was something wrong with him lusting after his own mother like this. He didn’t know.On the other hand, sinc... Continue»
Posted by nana414 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 6975  |  
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Amanda

I would like to share with you the experience I have just been through in as much detail as possible. I will not disclose the names of the locations for various reasons.

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Bryce. I'm 22 years old, and have just graduated from a state university. I'm originally from a suburb of a city about 200 miles from my college, both in the same state. I'm 6 ft tall and weigh about 165 pounds…pretty "normal" build. I have brown hair, blue eyes, and am slightly tan. I've had longer hair a bit on the shaggy side for years, but now that I'm out working i... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1516  |  
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The Voyers That Got Away...

After graduating HS I became the girl that the guys I went to school with were curious about. 1 of them was 1 of my biggest crushes. He was twin and I was so into this weird little dude.

We crossed paths again while I was out 1 day and attending an event wit my s****r and we exchanged numbers. The look he gave me let me know why he wanted to exchange numbers. He wanted to fuck me. He knew it, I knew it & it was damn sure gonna happen!

The first time we got together he was shy,but so ready. He picked me up and we grabbed a bite to eat and I was just having a nite out with nothing in mind... Continue»
Posted by PeircedPlumpPleasure 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 392  |  
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I'm not Gay

I'm not gay, but my new flatmate is. His name is Mike (not his real name. His real name is Jayson.) I'm straight, and I've never really had much contact with gay guys. He seemed alright though, and a couple of nights after he moved in, we had a few drinks and a chat and got to know each other. He's really cool, and we have heaps in common. We've both just broken up with people, we both think relationships suck right now, and we both like white wine and Futurama. I think I'm gonna enjoy having a gay friend.
With no sex I keep waking up horny. A week ago I was in the shower, and I got out... Continue»
Posted by fed3rico 4 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2107  |  
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No longer a virgin...details of the following mont

See http://xhamster.com/user/querico44/posts/31230.html for the original story.

During the months following my 13th bday and the experience I had with Lisa my sitter popping my cherry, my Mom began to wonder why I always wanted her to call Lisa whenever I needed a sitter. She asked me why Lisa was my favorite and no one else would do. I tried to explain that Lisa was so good at entertaining me and she was always happy to play any of the games I liked with me. Mom said it was nice to know we were able to have so much fun together and that we got along so well, she must be a very good sitter ... Continue»
Posted by querico44 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 3300  |  
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Development of a Lesbian - Bonus

Hey everyone. I got a pretty good response to my last story so I'm going to post something I discovered on my old hard drive - my writings from when I was about 14-16. When I was younger I used to write what was on my mind, so here it is! Also, if you notice any differences in this story and the last, its because I exaggerated a lot in the last one. This is all true however. (Note: I had a very odd writing style because I thought nobody would ever read it)

AAARGH! I WANT SOMEONE TO EAT ME OUT NOW!!!

I'M SICK OF PORN. I WANT FUCKING!

My tits are getting bigger now. They are so s... Continue»
Posted by helenaserret 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 398  |  
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THE MYSTERY OF THE BATON ROUGE

The name's Jack Wayne. I'm a private detective. It all began on a
sweltering Friday in June. I was sitting behind my desk thumbing
through a paperback of "9 & 1/2 Weeks" and sipping a glass of
bourbon when my secretary stuck her head into the office.

"Hey, Jack." she said in an annoying tone. "Jack, put the book
down for a minute!"

"What is it with you?" I growled. "You always butt in right when
I'm getting to the best page, Betty!"

"Excuse me for interrupting your reading hour!" she replied,
tossing ... Continue»
Posted by meatloaf90 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1063  |  
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Wasted Beauty

So i was walking home from a house party with my friend quite recently and as we was about to turn down the alleyway towards our area of residence we noticed two women on the side of the road just up from the alleyway. Being extremely pissed we thought it would be a great idea to as a laugh ask them to follow us. We walked into the alleyway only to turn round and see both of them slowly following us, we knew ful well what they was, the scum of the sex industry, street hookers addicted to some sort of d**g. Nevertheless in our cuurrent state we found the situation hilarious and shouted up to th... Continue»
Posted by Love_To_Eat_Pussy 4 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1121  |  
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Headteacher's Punishment


As I lay on the cold hard pale blue tiled floor of the school's store-room, tied up helplessly by Kaylee and her mean little gang, with the humiliating 'Fart in My Face' sign she left by my head, I was visited and farted on by lots of the school teachers. Lucky for me, they were only the female teachers. I smelt lots of flavourful womanly farts that day, and it was finally coming towards the end of the school day.

The end of my embarrassing torture, or so I thought...

The very last visitor came into the store-room.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!" The old cow yelled. It was my headte... Continue»
Posted by azid619 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1230  |  
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1st Time I had sex! - True Story

I thought I would give another story for everyone. It's kinda a short story but I enjoyed every minute of it. Once again, THIS IS TRUE! I love reading true encounters and I love telling you about mine...

My high school sweetheart and I came back from a party at her friends house. Since there was some alcohol at the party she decided to partake in a beverage or two. As we entered her house she stops me and starts stroking me in the foyer. Mind you, it's around 11:30pm - her curfew - and usually her parents kinda keep a keen ear to her coming home. So I am nervous because all her paren... Continue»
Posted by ffjester 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1988  |  
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MRS BROWN YOU HAVE A LOVELY DAUGHTER

It was Saturday morning and I woke up as usual, horny with a hard-on. I thought about jerking off as I showered but decided not to since I was going to go see my girlfriend soon. She was always ready to fuck and I could hold off till we were together. I arrived at her house and rang the doorbell. In a few moments her mother opened the door, I said "Hello Mrs. Brown, how are you this morning? She said "Hi Roger, I'm doing OK. How are you?" I said "I'm good, I'm here to see your lovely daughter Janet. Thought we would go out for lunch and maybe a movie." She invited me inside and closed the door... Continue»
Posted by querico44 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2123  |  
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