Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 65

The Italian Job 13

The Italian Job 13
The following morning to a knock on the bedroom door, Hazel walked in with some coffee and toast on a tray, “morning sl**py head” she said “how are you this morning?” she asked “morning Kim” she said, as Kim shot out from under the covers, she looked at me “how did she know I was here?” she asked “she knows everything, I think she is a witch” I joked “ you had better believe it” Hazel replied, she went to open the curtains, she stopped, “you had better see this” she said, I looked and saw Maria laid outside of my window wrapped up in a blanket, she was physically shaking wi... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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How I did LSD & lost my virginity for the firs

This is my first story so constructive criticism please, if you like this I will post more stories from my strange & crazy life. This is a true story, happened to me in the summer of 05' best day of my life.


So first the stats, you fellow story readers seam to enjoy them. The girl in this story Rachel is/was 1/2 Puerto Rican 1/2 Mulatto, 5'4" maybe 125lbs, Curvy, a nice handful of tits & a rock hard ass that went on for days. I was & still am, 1/2 irish 1/2 mexican, 5'9" 144lbs very skinny yet toned from lack of body fat, I'm a grower not a shower, at 9inches when erect & I'm cut... Continue»
Posted by dayzicle 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Chapter V Lesbian Love & sodomy

Great Lesbian Love and sodomy
Chapter V --- ---

Other stories to read: http://bisoumidomi.unblog.fr



After this meeting with Michelle and Mark, we often spent evenings together. Sometimes I came alone or with the elected if it accepted the moment. Throughout this period I confess I papillonnais a girl to another. Finally, rather than admit I had in reserve several lovers, and that depending on the mood I was choosing one or the other. Each may not know the existence of others .. Not necessarily, with some it does not pose a problem while others are more exclusive I had to juggle... Continue»
Posted by CinquantNERF 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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BigBimbo's Memoire #1: First Blowjob

A young man's (In retrospect, I was more boy than man) first sexual experience with a woman is a powerful, powerful thing. It completely changes your self-perception, it answers so many of the questions from your post-sexualization youth and changes you from an innocent hopeful into hunter that will never stop his pursuit. Here is a recount of my coming of age tale:

My first real girlfriend and I met because she was one of the trainers for the football team. Her daddy was extremely wealthy, her mother was bipolar and on lots of meds and, as a result, she was very screwed up. I was obliviou... Continue»
Posted by bigbimbo 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Teenage valentimes

It was the 14 February 2011 st valentines where many couples try to flatter the other partner to end up haveing long and hard sex with them. this was no different for 16 year old carl, Carl was physically fit young guy; who has a shy personality to go along with his short brown curls. Carl was walking along the warm avenue where his sexy high school girlfriend lived. He had flowers, cards and a lucky durex in his back pocket just In case things went well. HE knocked oh the large red door to Molly's house ,a young blonde girl with tight white top on opens the door inviting her boyfriend over... Continue»
Posted by Daisywilliam 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Jill's Wild Interracial Adventure

(Jill's alligator mouth get her in real trouble)

How it all started:

L.A. in the summer, save for the pollution factor, isn't much different than Florida in the summer, both are hot, with crowded beaches as Jill was finding out. Long Beach they called the town named after all the beach front property, ran out all the way to Seal Beach, which continued to other beaches, but all the same waterfront, just miles upon miles of connected beaches. Still, with all that beach front you'd think there'd be some room to spread out in peace, she thought, as a group of black men stampeded through kick... Continue»
Posted by KingAmir 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Poetry of the Genitals

Her

I cannot help it I love your dick,
Upon its head I like to lick.
I love the hardness of your shaft,
It’s no game but a well skilled craft.
I love to linger around its head,
And make you cum all over the bed.
And oh we can’t forget the balls,
Cause their my favorite part of all.
I’ll finish the task by jacking you off,
And swallow real well so you don’t make me cough.

I LOVE THE COCK!

Him

I love to eat your creamy pie,
About this fact I could not lie.
To take my time and eat you well,
To taste your love and feel you swell.
It is the greatest thought of all,
... Continue»
Posted by Testdriver 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Stranger on a Plane


It was 7 months after the birth of my second c***d and 3 weeks after my tubal ligation. I was mildly anxious because this was my first business trip away from my husband and two k**s in over two years. The trip was important, our company was evaluating a water reclamation project and I was asked to lead the engineering team. I was nervous and my usual self-surety was shaky from the 12 week absence I had taken earlier in the year and the gravity of the current project. Don't get me wrong, I've always been confident in my abilities and I command respect of even the most senior colleagues. My ... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Most Embarrassing Moments Ever!

I was taking a shower one day.
Suddenly my at that time 2 year old son came into the bathroom and he had wrapped himself in toilet paper.

Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so i ran for my camera and took a few shots.
They came out so well that i had copies made and included one with each of the Christmas cards that year.

Days later, a relative called about the picture, laughing hysterically, and suggesting that i take a closer look.

Puzzled, i stared at the photo and was shocked to discover that in addition to my son, i had captured my reflection in the mirror wearing... Continue»
Posted by Maggan1964 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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joke of the day!

So this guy goes up to a girl and tries to charm her by saying "hey i was gonna tell you a joke about my dick but it's too long".The girl replies,"thats funny".I was gonna tell you a joke about my pussy...but you'll never get it".... Continue»
Posted by jadoushka 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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That one time in the bushes next to school

This, like all the stories I post on here, is a true story.

I studied arts in high school, which basically meant my school was a melting pot of stoners, hot alternative chicks, emo k**s and a bunch of teacher’s still thinking they’re 16 years old. The school was one giant orgy: over the four years I attended it, I must’ve fucked about 30 to 35 girls, including all of my female classmates but one. I have so many stories to tell about my time there, but I’ll start with just one.

That time in the bushes.

At one of our school parties, I’d made up with this girl who was a year younger than... Continue»
Posted by Mercutio85 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo, Voyeur  |  
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In the Toolshed - Short Story

Edward Caine, 42, electrician, divorced, lives without a partner since five years. He likes to sit on his front porch and to watch the school girls on their way home. It fascinates him, just to think about their blossoming youth and the trials and disappointment they are growing into. So it's no real wonder where most of his erotic fantasies are coming from:

I walk into the back yard as I hear faint voices coming from my garden shed. But as I approach it to find out who is playing in there the doors suddenly opens. I manage just in time to hide away around the corner: it is a young bloke ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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ICarly Sex Story; IAm Not A Virgin

ICarly Sex Story
Iam Not a Virgin

"I'm sexy Carly"
"and I'm slutty Sam"
"And this is ICarly"
Carly and Sam are doing a normal ICarly rehearsal in their studio with Freddie. As they get half way through Sam gets a text message.
"I gotta go" Sam says
"we're in the middle of rehearsal" Fredie exclaims
"I've got people to see" Sam responds
"Oooo a date?" Carly asked
"You could call it that" Sam says as she leaves with a dirty grin on her face.
"So now what?" Carly asks Freddie
"Oh I've got some tech stuff I need to fix"
"Alright i'll be in my room thinking of ideas for our next show... Continue»
Posted by sexybabe132 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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THE BOSS'S DAUGHTER

THE BOSS’S DAUGHTER

It had been well over a year since Dave had seen his s****r and his niece. He had been working really hard at his job and had not made much time for his f****y.

Dave had decided to go spend a few days in Miami where his s****r and her daughter Anita lived. It had been close to two years since his first encounter with his lovely niece. He had spent the last few days thinking about the sexy nineteen year old, and all the things he had planned to do to her sweet sexy body. Dave never bothered to call to say that he was coming for a visit; he thought that it would be best... Continue»
Posted by chrish24 2 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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I FUCKED MY BOSS ;)

Im a 23 year old guy when i was 18 working in a Pharamacy this happend like 5 years ago and this storie im gunna tell you i well never forget THIS WAS INSPIRED IN TRUE STORIE.

I been a Stockboy for 3 years in a Pharamacy store i wont say which one but its very popular.Anyways i have this Boss that i had my eye on for a very long time since ive been working in that place her name is Elaine she is very beautiful mexican middle age women about late 30's early 40's with a lovely spanish acccent,long curly firey hair,brown eyes,beautiful face,nice thick body with thick legs and huge do... Continue»
Posted by Guts3177 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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I REALLY LOVE YOUNG COCK 2

I REALLY LOVE YOUNG COCK
PART 2.

Andrew had asked me and the boys out to celebrate his 19th birthday next week but my husband was coming home early from his trip abroad so I had to ring Andrew and tell him that we couldn’t make it and the reason why,

Oh that’s’ ok Mrs. Miller I do understand there was a hint of disappointment in his voice,
I’ll tell you what how about you come over to my house as you normally do next Friday and instead of me going out with the girls,
I can do you and the boys a meal and have a late celebration for your birthday how does that sound?
That’s great Mrs.... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Art class

Caroline and me had been pals for ages, our parents were friends so we had spent a lot of time together as k**s and a friendship had developed.
This long hot summer may be our last together as I was off to Uni in the autumn and Caroline was hoping to go to art school.
We used to spend a bit of time together when our parents were at work, just hanging at her house and listening to music and the like.
Today Caroline seemed to have something on her mind, she was a bit shy as if she wanted to say something but wasn't sure she should/
" Mike, you know how I'm applying for art sch... Continue»
Posted by celcus 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Adam comes home for Christmas

Adam could not wait to get back to the warmth of Florida from his college in the North East. He liked the university, just not the climate. He was met at his plane by his parents and his f******n year old little s****r, Alice. He was a freshman in college and she was also a freshman, but in high school.





It was very hot that day and she was just wearing a loose halter top and some very short and very tight shorts. It had only been four months since he saw her last, but she seemed to have matured quite a bit. Her tits were now a pretty good B-cup and her ass was filling out nice... Continue»
Posted by adam2010 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dear Dirty Diary - part 16

Dear Dirty Diary,

Thanksgiving weekend all the Huntingdon stores started pushing their winter fashions, so Louise and I went shopping. Even with all the closet space in our new apartment, I had to do some fall-cleaning to make room. I dumped out my pantyhose and tights drawer on the bed beside my relaxing husband.

Each pair I got rid of, Doug would pick up, carefully examine, then like an old fart would ask, “What’s wrong with these?”

I’d point out the runs in the expensive ones and the starchy feet and sags of the cheap ones. I hesitated for too long before tossing out one ... Continue»
Posted by AdorableLaura 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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My girlfriends boss.

I had been seeing Stacy a while now and popped over to the place where she worked for a lunch date.
When I arrived at her office she wasn't there and after a few minutes of waiting I decided to leave, then a door opened and Stacy's boss walked in.
"Oh hi there, you came to see Stacy?" she asked seeing me sat at Stacy's desk.
"Yeah" I replied politely.
Stacy's boss Lynne was kind of a Milf, a hot mature woman that seem to have a hell of a body and a large cleavage under the business suit she wore.
"Oh well I had to send her out to do a couple of errands" she then said.
"But you can wait i... Continue»
Posted by bighornycock123 3 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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