Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 64

Kelly Bundy's Saturday Morning Surprise Part

Saturday morning came early for the younger Bundy f****y members; Buck as
usual was humping Marcy's poodle; Bud had just screwed Amber and she was
staggering back to her aunt's house butt naked and tired; Bud has now
crawled
back into bed to cuddle up with his other warm piece of ass for the
morning,
he had started out fucking her, but duties called for him to service Amber
and to keep her pussy happy.

Kelly sl**ps soundly as usual as she normally gets back home around 2am
from
one of her boy friends, where she usually gets screwed in the back seat of
their car, or gets ... Continue»
Posted by Kazron 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 6811  |  
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Development of a Lesbian - Bonus

Hey everyone. I got a pretty good response to my last story so I'm going to post something I discovered on my old hard drive - my writings from when I was about 14-16. When I was younger I used to write what was on my mind, so here it is! Also, if you notice any differences in this story and the last, its because I exaggerated a lot in the last one. This is all true however. (Note: I had a very odd writing style because I thought nobody would ever read it)

AAARGH! I WANT SOMEONE TO EAT ME OUT NOW!!!

I'M SICK OF PORN. I WANT FUCKING!

My tits are getting bigger now. They are so s... Continue»
Posted by helenaserret 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 402  |  
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The Italian job

The Italian job.

For many years I have worked abroad installing plant and equipment around the world, one such job was situated in a small village in Italy, I will not give the name to protect the innocent etc.
My lunch was normally a sandwich and a beer prepared by one of the factory ladies which I normally ate beside the machines that I was installing, there were a couple of people in the factory who could speak a few words of English but the company had got a young girl the daughter of one of the women in the factory who spoke good English to interpret for me, when working abroad I try ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1022  |  
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Men Jokes

One day God called Adam to him and said: "Adam, I have some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?"
"The good news," replied Adam.
"Well, the good news is I gave you a penis and a brain."
"OK.." said Adam warily. "And what's the bad news?"
"I only gave you enough bl**d to operate one at time."

Why are men so bad at sex and driving?
Because the bastards always pull out with no thought of who else might be coming.

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

How can you ... Continue»
Posted by TeenieR 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 328  |  
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Billy 18 - Aunt Diane 49

by MisterReason


When Billy Jefferson's parents had to rush out of town to be at the side of his grandmother after she suffered a stroke, his mother's s****r Diane was called upon to keep an eye on Billy and the house until his parents could return.

It worked out well, because Billy was very fond of his Aunt Diane. Since her husband had divorced her several years ago, she had led a lonely life out in the sticks, so being called upon to help was a welcome break from the boring routine of her single life.

...

Chapter One: Bad timing

Diane Shaver couldn't believe her luck, an... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 2401  |  
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Motel Room Sex

When I was done with my Air f***e boot camp, right out of high school, I was sent to a tech school in Texas. I was in my motel room one night, laying naked on the bed, and heard a couple come in. Just remember that I was down there for 18 weeks with out having any sex. So any ways I heard a couple come in and I was half asl**p and I heard the woman in the room next to me moaning and I got so hard I listened to them and then she said to her hubby you are so d***k. Then I heard the door open and then I got up to see if it was her or him and it was her so I put on my shorts and went out in th... Continue»
Posted by kbking70 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 4051  |  
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BEST Job Interview

I got to the job interview early; I used the time to go over everything I think they would ask. The secretary called me in and showed me to the head HR lady’s office. She looked to be in mid to late 50s and didn’t even stand up to shake my hand… “Mr. Sam” she said pulling her glasses down slightly over the bridge of her nose “I regret to inform you that the position you applied for has been filled, we… tried contacting you by phone and via email, but none of them seemed to work … cause here you are” “I…”, “I’ll tell you what” she moved the papers that were in the middle of the desk to the left... Continue»
Posted by dlbiblkm 2 months ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 6288  |  
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Yet another American politically oriented breeding


=============
Yet another American politically oriented breeding story ... just in time for the government shutdown over lack of passing a budget bill. Enjoy.
=============

This all happened when my husband Derick and I had the opportunity to go on a great camping trip with our neighbors Angela and Steve. Things got interesting when they ended up bringing along their friend, Blake. We were all in our late 20's and Derick and I had been happily married for 5 years.

We got to this awesome out of the way spot in the forest after a long drive and hike in. Blake turned out to be very... Continue»
Posted by billstew 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1300  |  
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I love a girl who loves to suck dick! (True story)

This is my first story on here...

Please comment and tell me about similar events. (if you want more info i will be happy to inbox and share)

So i been on a social site on my cell for about 4 years now called moco. I have had all types of women of there from big to small, ugly to fine, short to tall. That damn moco have got me more ass than any other site.
So im in the "near me" chat room to holla at the local chicks around a month ago and this girl has "my lips your dick" on a pic of her's and licking her lips. So i shot at her "you must really like sucking dick..." she like " hell yea... Continue»
Posted by DFreaky1 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1690  |  
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Funny blowjob in a nerd's car

Hello everyone, this is my first story here... This is a real one, i haven't many of them to tell so in the future i could switch to fantasy. I'm also not english so tell me about my writing :-p
By now: here the facts. I was 23 and i broke up with my boyfriend after almost 1 year, i was very sad, angry and, must admit, cock-hungry.
That night a good friend of mine held a birthday party in a nightclub, we danced and had a very good time, drinking much. Aware of me being a good drinker, my friend drove me to the party. There, however, she found a very handsome man to go home with, and asked me... Continue»
Posted by Bailight 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1733  |  
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Mistaken Identity

Man gets to lead the life of a rich man...if only for a day...

Mistaken Identity.

Back in the day, the early 1980's to be precise, I was badly in need. In need of a job, to be more specific. These were times of prosperity for most. The Dow had recently hit 2000, which was a record. The economy was booming and would continue to do so throughout most of the decade. Everyone and everything seemed to be doing great, except for me. Being the remarkably perceptive dude he was, my friend Rich sensed my need for employment. He had recently started a small company installing and mai... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 821  |  
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Eve (A true story...OK, maybe not)

Going back in time to give the first woman her first orgasm...hey, somebody had to do it...

Eve (A true story...OK, maybe not)

Hello people. Hope you are doing well out there in Fantasy Land. What, you say you are not in Fantasy Land? Oh you will be soon. Don't worry, because we are going deep into Fantasy Land. So deep, we may never return. And believe me, you will go to Fantasy Land with me. Even if I have to pick you up and sling you over my shoulder. So come with me, to Fantasy Land.

It all started innocently enough one fine day back in the eighties. If you recall f... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 606  |  
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Max's monster cock in his tiny sibling

This is Max



No one in school knows about his monster cock and him being so skinny he wasn't so popular in school. At eighteen he is still a virgin and really wants to have sex. He is worried about girls not being able to take him and not want to have sex with him.

Max has a little sibling called Alyssa, at fifteen she has slept with a few people, she always has a huge line of guys wanting her. This is what she looks like.
[image]http://31.media.tumblr.com/2c1bf... Continue»
Posted by alwayshornyplymouth 11 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 12200  |  
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That’s what friends are for!

Just Being Neighborly

I first had a chance to meet our new neighbor when we were both getting our mail out of our adjoined mailboxes one day around noon. Looking her over she had a bit of a very tired look on her face but from the neck down she was hot. She was wearing sandals, really short shorts and a pullover white shirt cut at the waist and the neckline was torn down rather low. Allowing her to be the first one to get the mail I watched as she stooped over to grab hers. I got a pretty clear look down that the neckline of that torn shirt and saw nothing but cleavage. No bra and no tan l... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2487  |  
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My New Ther****t

The other day I was really sore from working out and thought it would be a great to treat myself to a massage. Being something of a massage freak I am always looking and hoping for that elusive Happy Ending as an extra. I looked on the internet under Massage Ther****ts and found a local gal who was happy to make an appointment for me the same day. She had a sexy sounding voice and I figured maybe I would luck out and finally get that Happy Ending I was looking for. But when she said her location was in a beauty parlor I figured forget the Happy Ending. This would be a completely normal and non... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1024  |  
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RAW: The Sex Magicians

Part 1 1

AT THE ORGASM RESEARCH FOUNDATION Dr. Roger Prong, who was known by some foundation employees as "a bl**dy Peeping Tom" and a "horny old voyeur" was in fact very scientific, or so he always insisted as he watched the girls having orgasms.

At the laboratory, Josie Welch, already nude but with a single sheet demurely spread over her full and obviously glorious body, looked unhappy as Roger entered.

"They tell me there won't be any men today,"

she said as soon as she saw the doctor.

"That's right, my dear," he said with professional unction. "That part of your testing i... Continue»
Posted by Johnnytames69 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 309  |  
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ROADSIDE ATTRACTION--Part 1

Lita had been driving across the country for hours and she was exhausted. All she wanted was a stiff drink and a good night's sl**p. She drove a couple more miles before coming across a bar on one side of the road, and a motel on the other. "Perfect!" she said out loud. She pulled into the parking lot, turned off the engine and got out of the car, locking it behind her.

As soon as she walked in the bar, Lita noticed two things....great music and nothing but women. She thought, 'A lesbian bar? No way!' She had always wanted to go to a lesbian bar, so she was rather excited. She sat d... Continue»
Posted by squirtlover33 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1033  |  
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Lovers Banging In Car

We knew it was not safe. At school, we loved being with each other, enjoying each other's company, cracking jokes and enjoying the time along with our studies. If we would get a chance, we would do some fondling and touching. The reason we couldn't take a chance again was because everyone had a doubt that we have crossed limits, and we didn't want to give our friends any chance of confirming their suspicion. Since we used to sit in the same horizontal row, even if the teacher was teaching, we were able to tease each other. Sometimes she would make some eye movements either pointing towards my ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 264  |  
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what a FUCKING day !

we are a couple and are very much in love and love to fuck each other whenever and where ever we can!

it was a saturday morning and my sexy boyfriend woke me up by fingering my pussy until i was nice and wet, he then proceeded to suck on my nipples and kiss all down my body until he came down to my wet pussy. he licked my clit and sucked on my lips until i came.

after i had cum he flipped me over ontop of him and slammed my pussy down onto his rock hard dick. i moaned with enjoyment... i leaned my upper body down onto his chest and began to shake my ass up and down just on the head of ... Continue»
Posted by Hrnycouple 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 533  |  
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Penile implant sex

This is a true story

I hope that men with erectile dysfunction take this information to heart.
Well let me start by saying I'm a 44 year old man that's been dealing with the fallout of a couple heart attacks and as a aside effect of my various medications that I'm on my Dick at first would work but I noticed that I could fuck for as long as I used to before my heart issues. I tried the pills, the pump, the muse system, all with no solid maintainable erection, so things with my wife were starting to get strained, and my confidence was shot. I told my doctor about my home issues with the wif... Continue»
Posted by Taboo69 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 825  |  
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