Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 64

Slave Sexual Conditioning

The searing pain is the first thing I feel as I become aware of my surroundings. As I struggle to try to find the source of it and to make it stop I begin to realize that I am held down by straps on my ankles, wrists hips, neck, and head. I cannot move except to squirm in my bonds.

I try to look around, as I feel the pain ebb, but I realize that I must be blindfolded. I hear a soft, soothing woman's voice say "I'm sorry - we must have miscalculated your anesthesia." I try to respond, to plead for it to stop, but I feel my mouth filled with a cylindrical shape. I grunt, and the voice respon... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
462
  |  
96%
  |  1

Dennis The Menace: Part 1 - A Mother's Love

the characters in this story are copyrighted but the story is mine. depending on the responce to this story i have 5 more parts i will post.

Dennis The Menace: Part 1 - A Mother's Love
by Sniper32

Dennis was in his bedroom one afternoon, doing what young men do, when his
mother Alice stuck her head in and told him that she was going to the store
and would be back in about an hour. Now Dennis was home alone and being the
curious type decided to snoop around in his mom and dads room and see what
he could find. So he went down the hallway and into his folks room, first he
looked unde... Continue»
Posted by sniper32 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
5944
  |  
96%
  |  17

Beer vs. Vagina

1. Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER
2.Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA
3.A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER
4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA
5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW f... Continue»
Posted by juce_ 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
1528
  |  
95%
  |  4

My wifes best friend.

The other night i came home to find my wifes best friend sandy in the house with out my wife there. i though that was quite odd but not unsual for her to be there but not by herself. So i asked where my wife was oh she said she had to go to the grocery store to pick some stuff. I said oh okay no problem. I noticed that she had been drinking some wine. We started talking i asked her about her husband bill. She said oh hes at work like usual working long hours this time of year. I told her that sucks a wife like you he shouldnt be working long hours like that. He should be home with you. She blu... Continue»
Posted by joe6977 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
4552
  |  
95%
  |  2

a knock at the door



Jeremy, having had another lonely dinner, sat down to watch the evening news on the television. Just as the weather report had started, his attention was interrupted by a barrage of very light tapping on his front door.
Wondering who could be visiting him at this late hour, he stood up and moved towards the entry way. As the door creaked open, he noticed a a beautiful brunette, (about in her early twenties or late teens) was standing before the threshold, shaking and nervous in appearance.
Before he could ask what she needed, this tiny half whimpering voice, uttered light... Continue»
Posted by JerseyBean 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
1146
  |  
95%
  |  5

Alien in town / there really are Orions

In my younger days, I was a decent amateur photographer. Once, when a friend got married she asked me to take her pictures. I agreed to do them for free if she bought the film. Neither f****y had much money and she readily agreed. Her future spouse came from a f****y where both mother and father had c***dren by previous marriages as well as some together. Except for the future groom, all were girls and all from 16 years old and up.Again, to save money, the mothers bought material and started sewing the dresses for the bridesmaids, most of whom were the groom's s****rs. They chose a bright for... Continue»
Posted by sometimesbored 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
564
  |  
95%
  |  4

Little Piggy Series (Nascar Ole Country Style)

Warning: This story has Dom/Sub, Wife sharing, Brutal Anal, F2M Oral, male creampie cleaning, Alc., Humiliation, and Nascar. If you’re trying to quit watching cars drive in a circle, PLEASE STOP HERE.

One thing that us Southern backwoods inbred, white trash trailer rednecks are known for it Nascar. Now add some friends, Alcohol, and me, a dutiful wife, and you got yourself a good time! Cum see how I pleased my hubbies desires. Don't forget the shine.






Once Upon a time in a Southern backwoods farming and mining community, lived poor uneducated folk, I was one... Continue»
Posted by WombDweller 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
2061
  |  
95%
  |  12

Granny Susan Finally Gets Laid

I love grannies, short ones, tall ones, skinny ones and especially those with silver gray hair. I’m a 52 year old guy who loves his GILF’s over 60. I belong to a Senior Single’s Group in Oro Valley, Arizona outside Tucson. There are over 100 women in the group and only 35 men and most of them are over 70. So I have my pick of the best looking GILF’s in the club. These women have one thing in common, they don’t get fucked anymore!!!! That’s where I come in, at any one time I am screwing three to five different GILF’s, my answering machine is always full. Most of my stable of GILF’s know about ... Continue»
Posted by captjim51 23 days ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
9602
  |  
95%
  |  3

Fun with Cucumbers at the Grocery Store

Prelude: Hot sexy woman describes her sexual escape with a cucumber in the produce section.

I get up this morning and take a quick shower, then put on my favorite short denim jean skirt and a matching color tube top.

I check out myself in the mirror one last time, then say to myself, "Honey, for being a middle aged woman, you look hot!"

After I put on my dark blue high heel shoes, I am off the to store!

The first shopping cart that I choose has a front wheel that clicks, so I decide to turn around and get another one. Suddenly, one of the the guys that work in the produce section t... Continue»
Posted by TonyClinton 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
912
  |  
95%
  |  2

Morning Wood

Stretching with a groan, my hands reach for the warm body I can feel under the covers beside me. The early morning light pours in from the window just above the bed, and as my hands run over your chest -tangling in the thick hair that covers it- I can feel you reaching up to close the blinds. A smile erupts on my suddenly warm face, there can only be one reason for closing the blinds at this time of the morning. I reach above us to the windowsill to grab my glasses, making sure to lean as far over you as possible, my breasts raking over your chest causing my sensitive nipples to harden suddenl... Continue»
Posted by experiencedvirgin 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
486
  |  
95%
  |  3

Fucking my Roomate

Fucking my Roomate
Part 1

I was 22 and I remember it was the day before my roommate's birthday. For the sake of the story let's call her Hillary. She is a lesbian (but I had heard stories of her fucking guys a couple of times). Good looking, great body (she was really athletic), and an admitted slut. But I had known her for so long it wasn't really a big deal. I did my thing, she did hers, and I never really thought about fucking her because she always talked about how sex with guys was "gross" that I guess I put a wall up. Besides I was more interested in girls I actually thought I had ... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
4021
  |  
95%
  |  8

Sister in Law's mouth

s****r in Law's mouth

“You are always fucking eating” my s****r in law Jasmine says as she walks in the kitchen, this chic hardly wears anything when mom and dad are not home, she had on a pink t-shirt that covered up to about two inches of her lower body, I could see her black panties. “Why are you always cussing at me? What have I ever done to you?” I asked before taking another bite of my sandwich. “That’s all you do b*o… that’s all you do” she answered not making any sense to me, she opens the fridge and grabs a bowl of leftover salad and prepares herself a small plate.

Jasmine is 2... Continue»
Posted by dlbiblkm 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
10630
  |  
95%
  |  7

Special Stuffing-Happy Thanksgiving


" I can't beleive I'm doing this"
A thick wet slap resounds from the steel sink. It is followed by a moist gurgle and then the sound of wet suction followed by another wet slap.
"Don't throw out the gizzards, they're for the gravy."
A trilling giggle hits my ear next, then something heavy and slimy.I turn my head to be met with a slick fleshy column of skin bending towards me.
"That's the neck.Rinse it off and put it in the skilllhehehet." I laugh, pushing her arm towards the sink.
Giggling, she emerses her long fingers beneath the shooting water faucet and rubs them up and down the di... Continue»
Posted by lookyloo 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
838
  |  
95%
  |  6

Valentines Day Virus

Dwayne gave a strangled moan of pain as he burst through the front door of his house, one hand clutched to his crotch and an expression of absolute agony painted over his face. With shaky steps he hurried up the single flight of stairs and rushed into his bedroom. He almost fell onto his bed and hurriedly unbuttoned his jeans, tugging them down to his knees. His boxers soon followed and he looked desperately at his genitals, the source of his pain.

His cock was fully erect and an angry red color. But what was most alarming was his testicles. Dwayne's balls looked huge and swollen, approxim... Continue»
Posted by Erocus 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
588
  |  
95%
  |  3

Cheating Done Right

My friend and her boyfriend were staying in my flat while her parents had their house remodelled. I’d given them my bedroom and I had the couch.

I got in at 8am exhausted from work, normally they were having breakfast right now but nothing. I went to my bedroom door and knocked, no answer, I opened the door to find the bed made so I got out of my work clothes, put them in the laundry basket, had a shower and changed into my joggers. I came out of my room, sat on the couch and turned the tv on “Morning tv is shit” I said to myself. I laid down, closed my eyes and hoped to drift off to sl**p.... Continue»
Posted by w4nk3r 11 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
11275
  |  
95%
  |  3

The New Sexual Awakening

Most guys lose their Virginity in High School, Trevor Smalls wasn't most guys.

A meek and reserved young man, Trevor had a tendency to fade into the background wherever he was, the one exception being the Chemistry Lab that was where he burned hotter than his Bunsen Burner.

Being from a modest background made socializing at Pinkerton University especially difficult, as many of the affluent students didn't take to kindly to mere Scholarship students attending their school.

But Trevor saw an in, a way of making his financial and socially difficulties vanish, the Janice Prize.

The ... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
938
  |  
95%
  |  3

The Panty Thief

by Just4kinks (just4kinks69@gmail.com)

Kathy settled into her window seat after boarding the plane.
Forty-minutes after take off, she began drifting into a dream about the
curly headed Bajan man she had a pleasant affair with during her
vacation in Barbados. Her lover was gently massaging her inner thigh
in the dream when she realized she was being groped. The hand belonged
to a balding, pot-bellied man with a Jamaican lilt. He was cooing to
her gently, "Baby, you so sweet. Me want to eat you like a peach.
Mmmm, you so wet and delicious," he said as his hand rubbed
... Continue»
Posted by just4kinks 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
973
  |  
95%
  |  7

Jail Bait Part 1

You see, I work with criminals at a half way house. On their way out but not quite free yet. Like clock work at 7pm is curfew, i work with one other guy at this location. It's in The Bronx, a lot of people who live in the neighborhood doesn't know what kind of house this is. For the most part it's extremely quiet and neat. Most of the time I'm left alone in the house I work the midnight to 8 am shift.
This one night around 3:30am. I was reading a romance novel, a inmate walked up to the desk, he talked about his case. Like I wanted to hear it at all. Then suddenly the convers... Continue»
Posted by virginblood 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
2247
  |  
95%
  |  7

cum over for a drink (short but sweet)

I have this story to share, never actually told it to anyone before but it’s kind of fun so enjoy.
I live outside of town a couple of miles and therefore the parties always ended up at my place. Far enough from town that we can have a big fire and make some noise and no one cares but close enough to still get a taxi home or whatever. So, this was a typical small party. About 25 people gathered around the fire pit which was in my back yard. The house was always open so people could use the fridge or washroom etc. It was about midnight or so when I accidentally spilled a drink onto my pant leg... Continue»
Posted by mr_pearson12 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
531
  |  
95%
  |  2

Water Masturbation

One great thing about my tiny apartment is my big soaker bath tub. I spend lots of time there relaxing and washing away the day's worries. Tonight was one of those nights when I needed to soak with bubbles surrounding my aching body. Work wasn't overly difficult today but I've been stressed out a lot lately.

As I laid in the tub, I started to think about my One. He loves to bath me, wash me, caress me in the tub. He treats me like his "little girl" and I love that. But it had been a while since I had masturbated and came. I haven't been in the "mood" which is also very unusual for me. I lai... Continue»
Posted by Kinkster-Gal 4 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
968
  |  
95%
  |  9