Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 15

Hopeless romantic...

Well, since this is my very first post here, I know I will be screwing something up as I go along. Please bear with me.. :)

I am always a believer of strong relationship. No matter how rocky a relationship is, love will find it's way to unite the two hearts. Many of us may have different fetishes but I am pretty sure that this is for the pleasure of the other partner. You may share your husband and wife, make them your slave or anything that you can think of, but at the end of the day, both of you will be back together sharing the same love and remembering the vows that you have exchanged t... Continue»
Posted by Killroy17 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 124  |  
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Hopeless romantic...

Well, since this is my very first post here, I know I will be screwing something up as I go along. Please bear with me.. :)

I am always a believer of strong relationship. No matter how rocky a relationship is, love will find it's way to unite the two hearts. Many of us may have different fetishes but I am pretty sure that this is for the pleasure of the other partner. You may share your husband and wife, make them your slave or anything that you can think of, but at the end of the day, both of you will be back together sharing the same love and remembering the vows that you have exchanged t... Continue»
Posted by Killroy17 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 287  |  
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Advice for you men...er, BOYS

When I was younger, before I had my male cherry taken by a beautiful, sweet, caring, and VERY patient woman (Did I mention BEAUTIFUL? They're ALL beautiful in their own way!)I was like a blind, starving dog in a meat house! When you're not getting it, oftentimes you just want to rip her clothes off and jam that thing right into her quick! Get it in, get it out! "It won't hurt, did it?!" Nah, hah, hay!! It's like when you want to get a car loan: you aren't gonna get it unless you really don't need it! Same with getting laid. The best luck I ever had as a pussy magnet was just AFTER I ma... Continue»
Posted by Volfy 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 604  |  
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Chapter 2

I am getting SOOOOOOOOOOOOO sick of seeing all your tallywackers! I KNOW girls don't want to see them, either. I've read enough of them TELLING you so! What would your mother think?!? Guys, can't you come up with something different for a profile picture? Try something a little more original! A picture of an elephant's trunk, if you just HAVE to show something long and hard. --Or how about a pic of a naked stripper wrapped around a stripper pole with her tongue touching the pole... Now THAT would be sexy! But your pitiful peepee? Come on! Give us a break! I'd venture to say that just ... Continue»
Posted by Volfy 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 177  |  
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After Work - An erotic fantasy written by Rod Hous

It's one of your favorite bars, although you have not been here for quite a while. Lots of attractive men, especially during happy Hour. Unfortunately, that's also why there are always so many attractive women here at the same time. A lot of competition.

Still, you have had good success here in finding a partner for the evening. But tonight will be different. You will target the sexiest man here, and he will be your prize.

You have self-confidence in your appearance. You know that your young slim figure catches a man's eyes, and that you have a killer smile. Yet, you never seem to leave... Continue»
Posted by RodHouston 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 349  |  
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If I Had One of Those

If I had one of those I’d play with it all the time. I’d tease it and I’d pamper it. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for it. I’d use it every way I could think of. It’d be VERY MUCH worth it…
I’d show it off. “Hey, look what I’ve got!” I’d use it to tease all the boys. I’d wear really short skirts and the highest high heels, and I’d swing my hips just so, as only a real woman can. I’d spend a lot of time sitting in places where the boys walked by. I might even whistle at them! I’d be such a slut! When a really cute guy walked by I’d smile at him and open my legs to let him see ... Continue»
Posted by Volfy 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 295  |  
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First Flight

This piece of writing is an extract from my novel "Toggenburg" It's not a sex story as such but I post it here for a dear friend who I learned to my surprise had never flown on an aeroplane! Since this chapter was about a character's first flight on an aircraft i decided to post this for a little fun and to whet the appetite of my beloved shewolf for her first journey into the realms above.


The following day dawned bright and sunny although there were still clouds about clinging to the sides of the mountains. Sarah was up early; jumping excitedly out of the bed she shared with Daniela at ... Continue»
Posted by Mikebasil 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 714  |  
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Happy Ending Switch

I have been seeing the same massage ther****t for the better part of a year now. She is in her mid to late 30’s and fairly attractive. While she is a state licensed ther****t she does occasionally make exceptions to the state laws pertaining to Happy Endings for very few clients. And I just happen to be lucky enough to be one of those few clients.

Over these last few months I have k**ded with her about turning the tables on her and offering to have a session with her where I massage her instead of her massaging me. Well, when I called her for my last appointment she asked me if I was seriou... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1224  |  
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chating spanish wife

My fingers peck at the keyboard as I blink at the screen, the words glowing fuzzily back at me. I reach out and take a sip of my soda to wet my drying lips. I read over her words again.

{my pussy is so wet for u}

I glance at my response in the send box before hitting return, watching my words magically appear on the screen before me.

{r u playing with urself now?}

I couldn't believe how wrapped up in this I had become. I never went into chatrooms before, the whole interest of computers and Internet communication escaping me, but sitting home by myself for days upon days, nothing to... Continue»
Posted by zopri 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 414  |  
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QUOTATION ABOUT LOVE :)

The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand

Mahatma Gandhi was what wives wish their husbands were: thin, tan and moral.

In Brighton she was Brenda
She was Patsy up in Perth,
In Cambridge she was Candida,
The sweetest girl on earth.
In Stafford she was Stella,
The pick of the bunch
But down on his expenses
She was Petrol, Oil and Lunch

It is impossible to love and be wise.

Love your enemies in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards

Love your enemies in case your friends ... Continue»
Posted by All-The-Way 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 107  |  
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QUOTATIONS ABOUT LOVE

The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand

Mahatma Gandhi was what wives wish their husbands were: thin, tan and moral.

In Brighton she was Brenda
She was Patsy up in Perth,
In Cambridge she was Candida,
The sweetest girl on earth.
In Stafford she was Stella,
The pick of the bunch
But down on his expenses
She was Petrol, Oil and Lunch

It is impossible to love and be wise.

Love your enemies in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards

Love your enemies in case your friends ... Continue»
Posted by All-The-Way 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 155  |  
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Anna 1 Anna and the Firemen

---- Anna 1: Anna and the Firemen ----

Trying to ignore the pain in my back, I gently squeezed Anna's firm buttocks. Such a sweet ass she had, a great handful to hold on to, to pull her against my penetrating cock as she rode me to an orgasm.

She'd collapsed on my body now, her heavy breathing still puffing against my neck as she cuddled in post-orgasmic satisfaction. I squeezed her buttocks again. Let her get her breath back, and then maybe I could roll her over, throw her legs over my shoulders, and fuck her hard and fast for my own climax!

I heard a faint noise and open my eyes.... Continue»
Posted by cptfritz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1689  |  
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Anna 3 Anna and the Principal

-------- Anna 3: Anna and the Principal --------

Anna's young son was looking for a cartoon video when he found the stack of photo printouts on the TV cabinet. Curious, he leafed through them. He was amazed to see his mother's face in many of them! But she was always naked! And there were men, one was a huge fat black man! In many of the pictures the men had their things, their wee-wee's sticking out! Except they weren't like his wee-wee: these were big, long, stiff, not short and floppy like his. He looked closely at some the images: yes, it's like he thought: they were sticking the... Continue»
Posted by cptfritz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1662  |  
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European Closeness

-------- European Closeness --------

I met an older but very attractive woman, Tascha, at a local shopping center. Her middle European accent, exotic looks, and damned good figure and legs caught my attention, and I did my very best big strong young soldier act on her, helping to reach an item on a top shelf for her. I pulled the old gag about being an ignorant bachelor, not knowing what to select for supper. Smiling, she joined me in shopping and helped me fill my cart, making suggestions for easy to fix, tasty, good meals. We found ourselves getting along very well, and she invited me... Continue»
Posted by cptfritz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 561  |  
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What changed your mind?!

(true story)
Last night I was craving to be fucked by my boyfriend. He worked overtime today & was exhausted. When we were all ready for sl**p, I begged for his cock but he shut me down. I even said I would do all the work & even rub his back after..he was just too tired. So we both went to sl**p. Now remember his younger s****r sl**ps above us on the top bunk. I woke up to switch sl**ping positions and i feel him touch my ass. I didn't think anything of it, I though it was accident. Then, he pulls the blanket off of me & pins me down. He locks his lips with mine & I shove my tongue into his ... Continue»
Posted by mgrzywac 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1165  |  
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Billiards and the Hooker

-------- Billiards and the Hooker --------

I was sitting at the bar in a rock and roll club not far from the traffic circle just outside Fort Benning. I'd been there for a little while, sipping a beer. The band wasn't too bad, but the crowd was small, not much going on.

A skinny little guy, younger than me, long hair, worn clothes, your generic weasel type, had come in and sat down at the bar a couple chairs down. When the bartender came to serve him, he ordered a draft beer and dragged out some change from his pocket and was counting nickels and dimes. I shrugged, what the hell, and... Continue»
Posted by cptfritz 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1126  |  
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Almost caught getting head

I was dating a very sexy blonde. I would go to her house everyday just to fuck our brains out. She always loved to film us going at in every room of the house and she loved sucking my cock. I was living in high heaven with this chick. One night we were in her living room having a bit of fun when we heard someone walking down the stairs. We paniced and put on our clothes with not a moment to spare. I stood up with a raging hard on right as her dad walked around the corner. I said "Hey Mr. B, Katie is going to walk me to my car" he said "bye" and I managed to make it 5' down the stairs before sh... Continue»
Posted by Kyle2290 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1314  |  
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Lap Dance Heaven

Like most towns do these days we have our share of adult entertainment establishments. One day I decided to reward myself after a hard day’s work and visit one. As usual, when I entered the place in the middle of the day, the interior is very dark and I couldn’t see shit until my eyes could adjust. I walked in feeling like a blind man; my hands reaching out in front of me feeling around making sure I wasn’t going to run into something or someone. I hoped I wasn’t going to trip over a table but I didn’t mind if my arms wrapped around one of the ladies who were dancing there. Just as long as the... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 821  |  
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Fucking a Friend

Please bare with me this is my first story.

Back in highschool I was never the biggest player. By the end of my 4 years I only had sex with three girls, but it was great every time. This is the story of my second, because it was especially sexy.

Her name was Berg, a nickname given to her by friends. Admittedly, not the classiest or sexiest nickname, but it didn't matter. Because while she didn't have the most beautiful face, Berg had a rockin body.

She had small D-cup breasts that she usually hid behind band T-shirts or hoodies, and a nice thick ass for a white girl that, while it di... Continue»
Posted by fisherflirt 1 year ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1099  |  
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Manghihilot na manyak!

In our place, there is one quack doctor as I can say. We locally called this "manghihilot", whenever we have some kind of sickness that medical doctors can not cure, we turn to them for cure. They usually use oil and oration and other amulets that drives sickness or bad spirits away. They usually do "hilot" or a type of curative massage that focuses on relieving bodily pains and sickness.

Our "manghihilot" is known in our area since I was a c***d, during that time he is on his 50s or something. Until now, he still performs "hilot" and at his age, which I assume at around 80s, is still ... Continue»
Posted by mrsbogmaliso 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 349  |  
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