Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 12

Dennis The Menace: Part 5

Dennis The Menace: Part 5 - The sl**p Over
by Sniper32

One Thursday evening, Alice was in her bedroom getting ready for bed, she had
just got out of the shower and was sitting naked at her make up table putting
on moisturizer, when her son Dennis walked into the room and sat on the end
of her bed. He watched her apply the lotion to her elbows and knees. "Mom
come over here and lay down and let me do that for you" he said.

So she got up and went over to the bed an laid down on it. Dennis took the
lotion from her an squirted some on his hands an started to applying it on
her l... Continue»
Posted by sniper32 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Woman's Story: First Fingering

When I had my first fingering, I was fresh out of high school and had just met the man who became my husband. He was a few years older than me but still a virgin and I was his first girlfriend. I too was a virgin. It was two weeks after we started dating that he wanted to fuck me. I wanted to fuck him too. He came by one night and we were out in the front of my parents’ house. We started kissing and he started to feel me up. He slipped his hand underneath my shirt and starting playing with my swollen nipples. Gosh, that felt good. He lowered himself down and starting sucking on them. Then h... Continue»
Posted by Sexyvixen36 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Mind-Blowing Head

It''s story time. My first time story so take it easy on me. The year was 2005. I had been separated from my wife forever, and we were pretty much done anyways. I always joke and say I was married on a Monday and in the club by Friday lol. Anyways my best friend decided I needed to go with him to his home one weekend. I figured why not. He had a girlfriend who had a friend who wanted to meet up. I was like cool, let's go. We get to my friends moms house(who happened to be out of town) that Friday nite. Me and my friend start drinking and his girl calls and says they are on they're way. 30 mins... Continue»
Posted by nasty2012 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Story: Body Shots




I had been without sex for a long time. I went to the bar one evening & visited with some male friends, none of them had ever appealed to me. We lived in a very small town where everyone knows each other. Aside from the bartender, I was the only woman in the place. James came into the bar and started visiting with my friends. He worked in town and lived in another town. I was immediately attracted to him. I had never seen him before. We made... Continue»
Posted by Sexyvixen36 3 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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A chance encounter with my former slut slave mistr

A chance encounter with my former slut slave mistress

I am in the Kroger grocery in Toco Hills in Decatur GA, picking up some toothpaste, and you happen to have stopped in there to get an appropriately sized cucumber in the produce section on your way home from your swing-dance class.
It’s a shocking “OMG” moment. Neither of us really knows what to say, but you look fabulous in your swing skirt and I’m in a tank top.
We’re both thinking … we should just say hi and keep on walking, but we can’t take our eyes off each other. You just look great. I can’t speak for you but it ... Continue»
Posted by emorymed 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Sexy Studying Sessions!

Honor looked at me from across the bed and caught my eyes staring at her fiery red hair.

"Are you ok Tommy," She asked, "I really need you to help me with these Maths problems and then we can concentrate on Physics"

We were both 16 and in Year 11 at our school. We had been good friends for ages and as our exams were fast approaching she had asked me to help her with her Maths, and in return i asked her to help me with my Physics. I had fancied her like mad for years but had never had the courage to ask her out.

"Yeah, i'm fine, just distracted a little." I replied, never taking my eye... Continue»
Posted by tomtheaussie 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Alternate Therapy

My name is Natalie Smart. I am currently studying for my Phd in Classical Literature at a large university in Eastern England. I find my studies absorbing and I guess most will call me bookish if not actually a prude. It's not that I don't get on with people, I can be very sociable whenever I want to, it's just that I quickly tire of them, finding most of them shallow and in the case of the men, interested in one thing and one thing only. Unfortunately I am frequently pestered as I am judged to be quite pretty. My breasts are larger than average, I have a heart shaped face with flashing brown ... Continue»
Posted by maverick3489 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Butterfly

I enjoy working behind the bar, serving drinks,cheeky banter with boobs like mine
I am eye candy behind the bar, the other good thing is I get to find items left behind by the general public.
It was on such an occasion that I found THE BUTTERFLY!
What's that I hear you shout,it's a sex toy,pretty sophisticated one, a bullet shaped body with two wings on elastic thong, plus a remote control. Totally wireless, abandoned under a table, maybe the bright pink carrier bag was a bit girly for the stud muffin who left it!
Opening the bag imagine my surprise when finding a box with German words Sc... Continue»
Posted by DiamondLife 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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One Night in April: Part 4

My name is August Fahey and two years ago I started secretly dating my best friends 16 year old s****r April Hunter. When I left for college we continued seeing each other long distance. To keep up appearances we'd go out on dates with other people but remain faithful to one another. I'd go home on Holidays and we'd sneak away together and elevate our pent up sexual frustration in (as the k**s say) marathon fuck sessions.

Time passed and we grew even closer. When April graduated Highschool she applied for Larchmont University, my school. I was ecstatic, but her mother had reservations espe... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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First time FAIL

6/13/2012 *name used pseudonyms, but based on true events*

One of my friends, Brad, was having a kickback. Nothing major Him 3 other friends me and our female friend in the group Veronica. SO as you can imagine from a bunch of game artists and programmers it was a pretty standard night. Video games, beer, music, a comic book argument about Before Watchmen which almmost came to blows and so on. 2 of the guys left early around 11 p.m. because they had work in the morning. Leaving Veronica, Brad, Tyrone, and myself. Tyrone had the most to drink that night and violated the alcoholics sacred hym... Continue»
Posted by GamerDick 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Kelly and I's Very Wet Time

Hi, this is my first writing piece here! Hope you enjoy! I'm gonna do a few more like it with this character later on. A lot of the
beginning is just character development and build-up and such, so if you're just here for the sex, scroll down or use CTRL+F to
find this part:

SEX BEGINS HERE:

aaaaaaand here we go!

_______________________________________________________________________________________

I was running back and forth, tidying up every little spot of my apartment. I rarely had company, which is why it
was always such a mess. Of course, it would probably end up being... Continue»
Posted by soniclemon 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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By the Way



The steamy water from the hot tub warms my naked body as I immerse myself up to my shoulders. I tilt my head back and rest it on the edge of the tub as I take in a deep breath of the crisp evening air. I reach one hand up to caress my nipple the other stretches down between my legs as I begin to lose myself in a sexual fantasy.

Feeling a presence I turn my head and see you standing there. With a big smile you raise up a bottle of wine and two wine glasses. I push through the water to the edge of the tub where you are standing. “Looks like a very good year” I say as I blush and pl... Continue»
Posted by vividtease 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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By the Way

The steamy water from the hot tub warms my naked body as I immerse myself up to my shoulders. I tilt my head back and rest it on the edge of the tub as I take in a deep breath of the crisp evening air. I reach one hand up to caress my nipple the other stretches down between my legs as I begin to lose myself in a sexual fantasy.

Feeling a presence I turn my head and see you standing there. With a big smile you raise up a bottle of wine and two wine glasses. I push through the water to the edge of the tub where you are standing. “Looks like a very good year” I say as I blush and playful... Continue»
Posted by vividtease 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Sexy Morning Shower

It was the beginning of a Monday morning; Lydia was waking up and rose slowly, bed covers slowly gliding down her lightly dressed body. She put on her pale pink silk dressing gown as she turned down the bed, meanwhile, Tristan who was lying next to her not five minutes ago, a slow riser, caught a glimpse of her tender bosom as she put the dressing gown around her, tying it at the waist in a simple bow.

He watched her leave the room, with gentle footstep into the large en-suite bathroom, a loving smile... Continue»
Posted by millavaux 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Kelly and I's Seven Minutes of Heaven

At the time of writing, the second story with Kelly, “Kelly and I Hit the Showers” STILL hasn’t been uploaded, so I’ll just go ahead with this third part and hope that the second one goes through the modding process before this one. If it doesn’t, part 2 will most likely be on my blog here since that goes up instantly. So this is part 3, the last part with this character for now. I’ll start taking requests now, read my blog on that! As usual, if you’re just here for the sex, use CTRL+F or scroll down to find this:

SEX STARTS HERE:

PLEASE comment! :)

Busy chatter filled the night air.... Continue»
Posted by soniclemon 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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“wondering what he would do…”

“wondering what he would do…”

This post, inspired by a communication from a specific xhamster woman, is purely my fantasy, based upon a remarkably small number of private messages where she shared what she liked about my writing.

Chapter 1: Shake something at them...
SHE (starting from her perspective):
I can’t believe that I’m actually flying to Atlanta to check out this kinky “Emorymed” guy from xhamster (Wonder what his real name is?). What started as a passing curiosity, evolved to email exchanges, 'make me blush' photos, skype and now, finally, “in the flesh”. Although w... Continue»
Posted by emorymed 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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English Pastimes (A day at the races)

Well a good day out at the races never fails to get me horny,the Sport of Kings,
watching horses run round a track is fascinating, I am usually lucky and win my stake back by the end of the day.
But I really go for the spectacle, Ladies Day at Royal Ascot is excellent for people watching, get to wear a hat,generally be elegant and a lady for the day.
Well until the Champers hits my heels.
It was at such an occasion I was recruited for the Pony Club, I am the Strawberry Blonde who actually believes they have taken the word gullible out of the English Dictionary.
So I will begin...

Stand... Continue»
Posted by DiamondLife 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Pussy Worship

Here is my story to answer a curious person on my blog at ifounddaddy.tumblr.com:

smallwhiteguy asked: yeah i think u should let your friend your worship your pussy and how is your friend going to worship your pussy? did the guy fuck u really good? [He is referencing another guy I fucked earlier that day in the second question.]


Me: Thanks for keeping my tumblr fresh with some stories I might not have told, and drawing all the details out. You are in for some loooong answers.

Well, turns out that I did see my friend. How does he worship it, well, he starts by letting... Continue»
Posted by Missy_X 3 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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My Dear Pooja

Hello boys and girls and special hello to my beautiful and hot bhabhis and aunties .Thank you for giving your time for my story .This is your friend Priyesh Preetam from the living city Patna , Bihar. Mail me if you like this story at priyesh850@rediffmail.com .I am doing my 10+2 at a collage in patna. I have very normal physique and looks, but I am good at my studies and am a man at peace so I got a good reputation in school and college.

As you all know I am living and study in patna but my native place is somewhere in bettiah. This story is about when I was studying in 9th in my native ci... Continue»
Posted by fuckutonight 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Categories of Women We Date After A Divorce

Types of Women That Men Will Eventually Date After Divorce

I’ve been divorced for a number of years and although many men browse through the internet finding articles for women written by women regarding dating after a divorce, I have yet to find any articles that dealt with the issues of dating for men, written by men on how date or avoid these personality types after a divorce. After a few years of extensive research by myself, I have categorized some women into some very recognizable groups that many of you haven’t articulated in your own minds because as guys, well, we’re... Continue»
Posted by Sinatra877 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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