Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 109

THE PICTURE MAN!

Yes I was nick-named the picture man. I had this traveling sales job years ago where I set up in department stores and signed up people to come in and have f****y pictures made. It was around 7:30 pm when I seen this Gorgeous woman enter the store, well I seen long dirty blond hair and a body that was built like no other.. and in minutes while talking to other customers she was gone. but on my mind. then 15 minutes later there she was walking my way, she got right next to my display, I taped her arm and as she turned around she looked to be about 60/70 years old by her face! I said you know yo... Continue»
Posted by mrdoou 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1174  |  
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how i lost my v

i was a bit young and for legal reasons im not telling you my age when i lost my virginaty but i will tell you this, NEVER FUCK A GIRL THAT HAS A STUPID s****r. it was a wednesday and i was walking to my girlfriends house to do.. you know, we enter the house to find only her cat and some beer bottes by her stairs, we disposed the beer bottles and went to her bed room, i startid to kiss her and she pulled my top of, i started to toach her breasts and get more and more sexual towards her, she pulled my trousers down leaving my pants and socks,then she took her top of and skirt, i un-hooked her b... Continue»
Posted by mrhuggibearzz 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 770  |  
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just fucked

Just left a bomb party with a celeb party. Fucked this guy in the bathroom. His wife was outside. Made him cum back to back with my fat wet juicy sloppy pussy. He said his wife has never made him do that. I sucked his dick while stroking it with my tougue as I rubbed his balls. I then began to suck his balls while jacking him off. He panted and panted as I licked his balls. What white balls he had...hahaha.. he said he always wanted a black bitch.. my mouth got juicy when he said that. Made him cum so hard it skeeted hard all over my face. O got it up again by rubbing his balls gently, I lai... Continue»
Posted by Phatpussy714 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 556  |  
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nmdwji writes pre cum dripped at the tip of his di



See Part 3 below! Conan The Barbarian Part4: The amazon needed to get away while it was still dark and Conan's men were sl**ping. She picked Conan up as if he were a doll and threw him on his back on his own horse and jumped on top of him so that he was pinned beneath her. Her huge ass was towards his face. She reached back and placed a leather strap behind his head and pulled his face forward so that his mouth was in her ass and tied the ends of the strap to the front of her waist. Conan's face was now tied to her ass so tightly he couldn't move his head in any direction. "I want that ton... Continue»
Posted by Lateshay 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 255  |  
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Vegerotica

"Oh, god, I'm turnipy today," Pepper sighed. "It's been way too long since we spinached."

"Come here, pumpkin," Sorrel told her. "Are you thinking you'd like some good old-fashioned yamming?"

"God, yes." Pepper settled into his arms. "It's been a week, and I've been dreaming about your zucchini."

"Glad to hear it, because the past few days, all I've been able to think about is your sweet little potato," Sorrel said. He hugged her. "Come on, baby, let's go upstairs so we can cabbage."

"Upstairs? My rutabaga's so wet just thinking about your hard eggplant that I'm afraid I'll drip wh... Continue»
Posted by zopri 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 107  |  
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five gold rings

26 December 2008

Darling, just a quick thank you note for my lovely Christmas present. A partridge in a pear tree, how unusual! You are SO thoughtful. I love you to bits

27 December 2008

Darling, thank you thank you thank you! Two turtle doves, how very sweet of you! You are such a romantic! Lots of love!!

28 December 2008

Thank you for the three French hens, darling, I suppose I can use the eggs. Bye for now.

30 December 2008

Hello sweetheart, I'm sorry about not writing yesterday but to be honest I was a bit worried about all these presents you were buying and I'm still ... Continue»
Posted by Jim-Nice-But-Dim 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 358  |  
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In The Hallway

My doorbell rings and I rush to the hallway. My heart leaps into my throat, my pulse quickens and my skin becomes moist. I have been waiting for you, here in my house, for so long. Now you have come and I can hardly wait for you to enter. I stand at the back of the long hall, itching to rush to the door and loving the exquisite prolongation of this moment, my body becoming weaker, my love for you becoming stronger.

From my warm secret hiding place deep in the dark of my house I see your silhouette through the frosted glass. You press your nose to it and you see nothing but shadow. Already ... Continue»
Posted by IrmaCerrutti 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 752  |  
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Stuff about me (anime)

I like anime, you know those japanese cartoons that are all the rage with those fringe types of society. I think it's great most of the time, I love the stories, I love the characters, and I love the art styles.

some of my favorites are:

Cowboy bebop, yes I'm one of those where this can't go anywhere but the top, It's great, I started watching it on adult swim and now I own the DVD's. It turned me on to getting a taste for jazz, and queens. I've identified deeply with different characters, and I love the thought of being a space cowboy.

"Trigun/Hellsing", with Trigun I love the cyber... Continue»
Posted by Blueballs4ever 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 269  |  
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B6 Chapter 17 Conflict

Chapter 17: Conflict

Dee Dee and Ebony strolled through the corridors of the Island on their way back to Dee
Dee's lab. "I figure since the company has a web-server, we can order the new door and the parts we need now, and we'll get those in a few days," said Dee Dee. She stopped at the door to the lab and keyed in the entry code. The door stayed locked. "What the heck? I know I haven't changed the codes recently. So much stuff has been happening, I've forgotten to do it
lately."
Dee Dee carefully punched in the five-digit code again, taking her time not to mistype a
key. T... Continue»
Posted by gregster 2 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  Views: 67  |  
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Theatrical.....17

Theatrical…..17

We went into the theatre and into the bar, I saw him almost immediately, he was standing talking to another man, the guy must have been in his late fifties, he nodded but made no move, he had a drink in his hand, Julia saw him and started to move towards him,
I caught her arm, “wait” I said, “why, he’s over there” she said, “I know and he has seen us so when he is ready he will either speak to us here or in the theatre” I said, “but why don’t we just go over and talk to him” she said, “because sweetheart, his wife died about 6 months ago and if that man is a friend of his ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 310  |  
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Theatrical......30

Theatrical………30, the conclusion,

Del turned but it was too late for her as well as another guy behind us picked her up and took her into the stall, there was one other guy with him and they took her close to the wall, tied her hands then hooked her to a hanging block and tackle, one of the guys pulled on the rope and her arms were lifted over her head,
one of the guys knelt down in front of her and pulled down her shorts, she seemed to be struggling but I noticed that as he got her shorts to her feet she lifted her leg voluntarily so that he could get them off, he put his hands round her... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 2 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 246  |  
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Paradise Island: Part 1

29, Single white male seeks similar age female with good looks and vibrant personality. I’m getting tired of writing that on internet dating sites. I started this journal to release my inner thoughts on paper but so far I've only confirmed my sexual inadequacies and personal hang ups. I’m creeping ever closer to 30 and I’m yet to find ’The one’ I've had 3 relationships in the past 10 years and had sex about as many times. I’m beginning to realise life isn't like the movies.
I've read plenty of erotic stories on the internet and seen even more Porn films. I should be an expert at this stuff... Continue»
Posted by Skats 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 669  |  
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Great car Mate! - A tale of Tea, Biscuits and som


I’ve told you about my fuck buddy and our first adventure with another guy, here is a tale of a very unusual dogging experience up at Wisley.
We arrived quite late one night and parked up in the cafe car park, both of us climbed into the back and started to kiss and cuddle as you do, I’m quiet keen to start removing her clothes as well as mine!
I’m down to my underpants and she is now just in her basque and stockings I’ve loosen her shoulder straps and sucking on her firm tits and tonguing her hard nipples, she has such wonderful tits and I can’t leave them alone, I take a peek outside an... Continue»
Posted by flashgit 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 330  |  
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vidya balan

This is an incident
happened between me
and my cousin vidya
balan. Am sure that the
name rang a bell in all ur
minds. Yes, am one
lucky guy to have her as
my cousin. This incident
happened after she
became an actress. I
used to visit her at
times and mostly after
her becoming an
actress. Though I found
her attractive before
too it was after her
film stint that I started
seeing her as sexy. I
dont remember how
many times I have seen
the love making scene
in parineeta. She
started ruling my
dreams after that.
I used to visit her
whenever I got a
chance. I even used to
... Continue»
Posted by superSEDUCTIVE 1 year ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 356  |  
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Freewill 504: Part 8 Campus Slut

Freewill 504: Part 8 Campus Slut (By Chris A)

Disclaimer: If you are u******e and/or easily offended by stories of an adult nature, then you should probably go away. This story and characters are purely fictitious, and any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincedental. Any one who believes they should try and recreate these situations and events in a real life situation needs to get serious help. With that said: enjoy!

It was a warm spring evening as I walked across the center of the campus toward my final evening class. I don't know what possessed me to take a 7:30 class t... Continue»
Posted by tzrlvr 1 year ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  Views: 455  |  
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Sexy story to Armoprince66@yahoo mountain dew

Now for your listening pleasure i made up a song for you all...a NEW SONG FOR U SING ALONG NOW EVERYBODY....IF YOU ARE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS ...IF YOU ARE HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS ....IF YOUR HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT THEN YOUR FACE WILL SURELY SHOW IT...IF YOUR HORNY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS..CLAP CLAP THANK YOU, THANK YOU... HAHAHA... LOL... FUNNY SH-T FOR SURE... CAN YOU SEE THAT BEING PLAYED WITH THE HOKIE POKIE AT THE SKATING RING HAHAHAHA HOW WAS THAT BOYS AND GIRLS HEHEHEHAHAHAHA!!!! Full service provider no greek IN THE GRECIAN LANGUAGE OF REDBOOK THAT M... Continue»
Posted by notreasonusa 1 year ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 589  |  
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Waxing with Marguerite

I sent Marguerite an SMS to say we were on our way, and that these boys were big if she could kindly waive the supplement for extra large cocks. She replied, “Don't worry lol”.

Adrian was wearing his jeans and no underwear. It looked as if he had some hosepipe down them. George was also wearing jeans but was wearing a thong underneath into which he had packed his magnificent equipment, so there was a very visible bulge. In fact, it seemed he was carrying his lunch down there.

When we arrived at the salon, Marguerite and the owner, Anne, were waiting in reception. Marguerite was look... Continue»
Posted by suaveliso 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 318  |  
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MY SLUTTY SECRETARY - PART 1 (INTRODUCTION)

Last month I met with one of my female ex-collegues I used to work with and….wow! so many memories came in my mind…
First of all, you must know that, in my working place, there are very few male employees. I mean, for several years, I was the only male on the floor where my office is. Then, you must know that a lot of my female collegues (some of them being real hotties) are married women or just involved in long term relationships, VERY unsatisfied by their men, so you can imagine that, with one like me, being in my 20`s, with a nice future in front of me, for lots of them being the only one... Continue»
Posted by carlotrafficante 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1302  |  
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jagerbomb stories pt 1

One of my favorite drinks is the jagerbomb, for those of you who never had this drink , it when you mix red bull and jager together . I know the Germans must haven taken the lost in WWII in good spirit because they made one hell of a liquor with Jagermeister. It one night and a crazy booty call to make this drink shoot to the top of my all time favorite list of drinks .

I was living back in NYC in 2008 , and I been talking to this cute dark skin latina woman , I think I meet her on tagged , or one of those social media sites . I had her cell number and talk to her about meeting up . She fin... Continue»
Posted by rudepunkfoc174 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 239  |  
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Taking it up the ass, putting it up an ass

It started off as a stupid joke, one of those things sororities want entering freshmen to do during rush week. All the older s****rs in the house I was most interested in voted that all the new freshman pledges would have to try anal sex before the end of the semester. If we wanted to join up, we'd have to take it up -- up the ass, that is.

I was pretty eager to get in, so I played along, but already I was trying to figure a way of faking it. I'm no prude, but I wasn't going to let some stupid frat boy stick it in me -- much less in my back door! -- just to get some stupid signed certificat... Continue»
Posted by fotisampini 1 year ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 481  |  
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