Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 109

The Homebrew

On the Friday of Faye's third week of absence from the lab, our boss sent me round to check on her. There's only so long you can play the "bit of a bug" card before it becomes taking the piss.

When I rang her bell and waited, I didn't think she was going to answer. It even crossed my mind that she might have bagged a sneaky last-minute flight to somewhere decidedly warmer than dreary old Scotland and had been phoning in her "still not better, I'm afraids" from a poolside somewhere gloriously hot. If I hadn't already been pissed off at her for making me cover her workload, that thought pushe... Continue»
Posted by Kinnie 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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MY FIRST BJ

My first BJ also my first story, not very exciting but sure what the hell.

Was quite a few years back now, in the days when you stand outside the off license and ask people passing by to get your drink..
My friends and i (about 15 of us) heard about a bonfire party in the woods (deerpark for those from Dublin :D)
It was brilliant there was loads of people up there dozens of groups massive bonfire music blaring and plenty of babes My friends didnt seem to be enjoying themselves and decided to leave and head to McDonalds (how that seemed the better option i will never know).
Against all lo... Continue»
Posted by crawler20 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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My b*****r Fucked me

On Feb 21 last week after I have finished my tuition at about 6.30 pm and all three pupils have left my house and I took a quick shower and cooked for my dinner. I was alone at home and my husband have gone to singapore for business needs. After watching TV for some time it was nearing 9 pm and I was having my dinner. My phone rings and when I took the phone it was the girl student and she have some more doubts about tommorows exam and she was afraid of exams. So I agree to clear her doubts and told her to come to my home. It was 9.15 pm and after 5mins she knocks at my door and I opened the d... Continue»
Posted by simpleunions 4 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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The Truth About Swinging 4

You're looking through the websites,and you and your spouse are going over countless profiles, from countless swingers,from not only your state,but every state,and all over the world;single males,couples,and what youre gonna notice,is how FEW and FAR and in between,are the single females,who are looking to have sex with another COUPLE.This is all but non-existent,and we will be going over this in the "Holy Grail" chapter of this series.MOST of what you are going to see,are couples, singles males and a few women.You will notice that all of these couples are as varied and as different as they ca... Continue»
Posted by heretic1 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Vickies Boyfriend

This story begins in my bedroom, with my friend and her new boyfriend. We were all roughly 19 to 20 at the time. I had just brought a new gaming console and thought it would be a good idea to invite my friend over along with her boyfriend (who she invited by the way) so we could try it out.

My friend had been dating this new bloke just over 2 weeks and I could tell that she was pretty into him, although she hadn’t slept with him yet or done anything sexual, from what she told. To be honest I thought nothing of it. She had a new boyfriend every other month or so, in my opinion it was only a... Continue»
Posted by Red555 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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PartyPlanning Chp1. Pt1.

Sarah...


"This feels great. The sun is not to hot on my skin but it's a bright clear day, the ladies are running like clockwork and so am I. Ten, I think ten moms have strolled by, just like yesterday. I'm so glad I decided to workout in my garage. Chicks love to see a man workout, especially a single guy like me. Last minute of my work out and this new workout DVD "Get Slim 4 Fem" Has me in top shape. And the host, Princess!, her highness. What a bitch but if I could fuck her I'd never stop. Last minute gotta focus...

10 m... Continue»
Posted by cohonjames380 9 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales, Taboo  |  
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Catch a view!

Some more years ago we went to a restaurant of a oarsman’s club at our river. I said to my wife, please wear that black leather costume with garter, lace stockings and black boots.
She put her black white striped bra under the jacket and no pants under the very short skirt. She looked fantastic. With every step her skirt moved round her thighs and her ass. The lace of the stockings look out and you could see the closure of the garter. Hot view.



So we went into the restaurant. There was a heightened podest with some tables a... Continue»
Posted by gs4love 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Favorite Fantasies #3



The scene is a one-room schoolhouse, somewhere out West.
The teacher is about my age, thirty-five, or even older. But she is
a virgin, a frustrated old maid. She has kept one of the pupils
after school, a strong, six-foot-tall boy who isn’t too bright. She
goes through a stern lecture with him about how he’s not been
paying attention during class, etc. She asks him two or three
tough questions, and when he can’t answer says she’s going to
have to punish him. She tells him to take down his pants; he’s
embarrassed but ... Continue»
Posted by hard_for_yu 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Flaunting It At the Frat Party

Flaunting It At the Frat Party


The name is Tolden. James Tolden. There are three things you need to know about me.....
One:
I am tall. My towering height of 6’9” made me a natural for basketball, and my talent made me a star.
Two:
I am hung like a Bull Elephant. The same early growth spurts which gave me height, also added copious inches to my manhood, which was well-sized to begin with.
Three:
I am not above humiliating a lesser man. I’ve done it lots of times. This was the first.
I had been invited to my first Frat party my freshman year of ... Continue»
Posted by jkd1111 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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sex in the barn

Sex in the barn:

I walk into the barn and I saw Maggie bending over picking up a bale of hay , I walked behind her and grabbed her tits she dropped the bale of hay straight away ,I started to kiss her at the back of the neck and around to her ear ,my hand went under her shirt to find her large tits hugging them very tightly ,I could feel her nipples get hard ,I already had a hard on watching her bending over ,I could see the outline of her pussy in the tight leggings she had on ,I took her top off and undid her bra, her big tits bounced ,I turned her around and started to suck hard on her n... Continue»
Posted by alwaysREADY2please 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Cum for me

it was a late thursday evening, i was revising hard for my biology exam, i got to the sex ed part of my revision guide and my penis grew like a daffodil spring,i was stroking my penis tirelessley when my nan walked in, out of nowhere saucey music began to play, she took off her dressing gown and uttered the words " let me play with your daffodildo big boy" and then she died. ... Continue»
Posted by thebakemeister 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The good story of the day [I mean it... lol]

I write essais for the sake of ART, great litterature, propaganding my ideas, changing the world's face : D : D : D, make weird things happen, express myself and feeling horny over writing it. I want to share with you the exquisite memories I got from the life I live. And do chose to live.

FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION

FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION

FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION


I mean, if you're not happy with my stories.. You can actually go fuck yourself. It's not even my maternal langage. So shut the fuck up.

*taking out a flash light and lighting up my face in some kind of creepy way like... Continue»
Posted by barbaraswitzer 1 year ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Me and my girls humiliate my passed out flat mate

Me, my friends and my flat mate spontainiously went out for a drink, we carried on the party back at our flat where the conversation went on about sex and **** sizes, me and my girls asked how big my flatemates was but he just shyed away so we thought we'd get him d***k.... as the night went on he got so d***k he passed out and thats when we started to have our fun.

We tied him up just incase he woke then unzipped his trousers and pulled the down... We all gasped in shock to how tiny and shrivelled up his **** was, one of my friends said she'd never seen one that small... EVER!!! another co... Continue»
Posted by ilovemysmallcock 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Jessica's wild naked night

Ok so im new to this whole story thing so send me feedback thanx.

Ok so it was dec. 16 2011. I had just moved in to my new house so it was empty besides my bed in my room nd a table n the kitchen nd sum chairs.

So as it being my new house i decided to have a little kickback (mini party). It was me and my girlfriend Jessica and my three good friends Tom, Pat, and Jas. So all five of us were in the kitchen playing kings cup. We wer on our 3rd game and Jessica was pretty wasted by then and couldnt hang with us so she decided to go up stairs and take a shower and laydown.

So mean wyle my... Continue»
Posted by jp_marie 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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A DEEP MOVIE

It was a sweet, warm fall day when my master came to visit me for a week.
It wasn't enough to just text him while he was a state away and on that day he came to see me.

Before he came I was getting myself off, and I was having an hour long stress relief after school. I was slowly pushing in my little 3 fingers, trying to guess how his big cock would feel inside me. And I stretched out my little tight hole that day as i let a little of my sweet/bitter juices flow out of me and down my little asshole.

Then it was time to leave the house,and I had to get nice and pretty for our movie date... Continue»
Posted by coconeko 2 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Wow my pregnant sister and me

Wow my pregnant s****r and me
3.00/5 (60.00%) 3 votes


ISS Admin August 1, 2006 0 Comments
I am a little boy of age 19. My f****y consists of mom, my dad, and I. I have a married s****r aged 24 now. She is living in Punjab. Last month my s****r had given birth to a baby girl. I haven’t seen the baby, since it was my exam period. I had my summer vacation and my mom asked me to go to my elder s****r house to see the baby. My s****r was very beautiful after her c***dbirth. She was very big now. She was looking plump and looking like Kate winslet of Hollywood. It was when I went my s****r’... Continue»
Posted by sweet1003 1 year ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Brain Transplant

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their f****y member lay gravely ill.

Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and sombre.

'I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news,' he said as he surveyed the worried faces.

'The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.

It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope.

Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.'

The f****y members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, 'Well,... Continue»
Posted by Deecee29 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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First time trying on a condom...

I was in gym class as a freshman in highschool, and we had the ever present awkward class where the boys and girls separate to learn about our sexuallity. (although as like right now it seems everyone had already explored theirs but me) and the learning set today was on safe sex. we learned about all different kinds of birth control from condoms to pills to "pulling-out" to diaphrams. all of it was very awkwards and so-far useless to me in my sexless life. so the assignment when we got home that day was to try on condoms they passed out to the class. surprisingly enough, the school didn't skim... Continue»
Posted by MDvirgin 4 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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weenie in a bottle

It feels like I've been alone too long,
With no girls around my mind
Was wondering.
Thinking of some way,
to release it.

I looked in the kitchen,
Saw some Crisco Oil,
And that's when my bl**d started to boil,
Ooooooh yeah.

Ow, Ow, Ow!
(Uh oh!)
Ow, ow, ow!
(Oh God! What did I just do?)

No one wanted to be with me,
Had to make my dream come true,
I wanted to hump something,
I didn't know what to do.
It seemed like a good idea,
And no one else was around,
I stuck my weenie in a bottle,
And now I can't get it out!

Stuck my weenie in a bottle today,
... Continue»
Posted by heavenly_joy 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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My Girlfriend Told Me She's Gay

Not really a true story...but, it sounds like fun...

My Girlfriend Told Me She's Gay

I had a girlfriend who told me she's gay,
My first reaction was to say "No way."
I gave this situation some heavy thought,
It seemed so against everything I was taught,
I told her she just had to go,
Who it was I didn't want to know,
I told her she could do what she like,
I didn't want to meet this other dyke,
Then in a while instead of being furious,
I found myself becoming a bit curious,
What she told me nearly put me in shock,
She'd been dating the girl down the block,
The on... Continue»
Posted by Exakta66 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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