Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 103

Grinding my teeth to a Sex technique

When I was a c***d I was told more than one time to stop grinding my teeth. One day,

while I lay in bed as a boy, grinding my teeth thoughtlessly! I loved the way it made my teeth just vibrate, and the shaking

that went through my gums, but then that scrilling voice came, from my parents room," Stop Grinding your god-dam- teeth, or

pitch a tent in the yard, and sl**p in it, I am trying to sl**p!" I had been yelled at for the last time over this kind creepy

hobby of mine! So, I started re channeling the energy to nibbling the end of my... Continue»
Posted by lotsoflots 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Hardcore  |  
780
  |  
75%

Sweet Little Coed Ass

College professor enjoys the anal delights of a coed
First let me say that this story happen rather unexpectedly this last winter at a medium sized college in the San Diego area. I am in my mid-40's, average looking kind of guy who happens to be a professor at a local college-teaching students studying to be in the medical field. As the story unravels I must say that I was in the right place at the right time...as nothing like this has happen before in my 16 years of teaching. Just to be on the safe side I have changed the people's names including the woman who is the main subject - whom I wi... Continue»
Posted by fotisampini 2 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
1144
  |  
75%
  |  1

The maid of the mannor

Ann worked as a scullery maid; all of her memories involve working in kitchens, cleaning pots, scrubbing floors and preparing a****ls, her mother had become ill and was bed ridden. Ann stood scrubbing the pots from Lord Thompson’s dinner; she heard his deep voice as he spoke to the doctor watching over Ann’s mother. Ann began to hear them both walking down the stairs and the front door open and close as the doctor left, she was deeply worried about her mother and started to scrub the post as hard as she could to take her mind off it. Ann scrubbed harder but her elbow smacked into the clean po... Continue»
Posted by Red555 1 year ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
823
  |  
75%

Lonly Kyle and the fantastic threesome,

During class Kyles phone rang in on the professor giving his best impression of a mad scientist in the lab. Kyle frantically tried to turn it down, but the damage had already been don't and his Professor was already all over him like a moth to the light. The Professor "So somebody didn't get the memo ah dipshit"? Kyle gave the professor an apologetic smile and said"i'm sorry emergency". Answering the phone he could hear loud shouting in the background as his friend Ema was trying to tell him something but the call ended just as soon as she said "party"! Kyle turn off his phone and thought just... Continue»
Posted by santiago7theshepherd 1 year ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
1283
  |  
75%
  |  1

The Tyrannosaurus R(ex) (Va)gina; our big bag of c

The Tyrannosaurus R(ex) (Va)gina; our big bag of collective Canadian Rights.

1. 1. What is RECTUM? definition of RECTUM (Black's Law Dictionary)
Definition of RECTUM: Lat Right; also a trial or accusation. Bract; Cowell.

The etymology of words provides for hilarious interpretations of the truth. Lawyers are wordsmiths and one of the little con games they play on their hapless victims is to change the meaning of legal terms to twist the meaning of the intent of all their Acts (plays). For this reason I always defer to terms specifically from Black’s Law Dictionary, 6th Edition. This is t... Continue»
Posted by townsendjimathotmale 1 year ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
121
  |  
75%
  |  1

Husband watches

Jools sat astride him. He didn't know where to look. She was so beautiful. So naughty. She wore flawless make-up. Her eyes smokey with shadow. Seductive. Her lips were a shiny gloss. She wore a red and black corset. One nipple slipping into view as she leant forward and kissed him. Between his naked thighs, his cock twitched against her fishnet stocking clad leg.
"I'm going to fuck you so hard," whispered Jools, her voice a hot whisper in his ear. She nuzzled his neck. Took one of his hands and placed it between her thighs. Under her palm his fingers rubbed at the sheer panties a... Continue»
Posted by bumfelt 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
669
  |  
75%
  |  1

Husband watches

Jools sat astride me. I couldn't believe my good fortune. Such a beautiful woman- dressed in heels, stockings and a red and black leather corset. Her sheer panties lay on the floor and I couldn't take my eyes from between her legs.
"I'm going to fuck you hard, sweetheart," Jools said, her breath a hot whisper in my ear. "I'm going to take all that cum you have for me."
"Oh my god," I managed to whisper.
Jools took my fingers and under the palm of her hand she had me work that sweet pussy. My eager fingers found her clit and she helped me slide a finger into her hot core.
She rocked bac... Continue»
Posted by bumfelt 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
1048
  |  
75%

TV Cuckolds

A lazy, inattentive manc***d marries a hot, nagging wife. It's a television trope, a device that allows for lots of storyline hijinks. The characters' sex lives are barely implied or even nonexistant on screen, but what if

10. Temperance Brennan, BONES

Bones is no one's doting, submissive wife. She is unemotional & unattached; early in the series we learn that she enjoys casual NSA sex. A frequent diatribe from her is that the anthropological need for monogamy is outmoded. Bones would take a lover & coldly admonish you for if you were upset by it. Temperance is also one of the more like... Continue»
Posted by poobah 1 year ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
504
  |  
75%
  |  1

no fucking chapter one

It’s time to play hard. Last night I got caught up in a fit of rage. I introduced the group of boys known as ‘the losers.’ Brent was a tall dork with a bad haircut and raging teenage acne. In his memory I was not girlfriend material. He hadn’t dated a girl and he was a sophomore. I entered the equation as a delinquent freshman pretending to be innocent. Another night I will tell you the story of devious behavior before I was a freshman. How I lost my virginity is a totally different story. Being in the gifted program I developed a double life. All of my academic peers were wealthy, w... Continue»
Posted by linmarris 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
2335
  |  
75%
  |  3

chinese ball torture chapter two

I knew it was danny’s last night in town. I wanted to make it special. It was his idea to go see a play at a fancy theater. My dad was a douchebag about some issues. Trust me I still got away with murder. He was old fashioned about making me wait until I was sixteen to have my first real date. I hated him for that shit. I was not your average k**. I had a huge secret. Right after I turned f******n my dad got me a job at the restaurant where he worked. It was all kinds of i*****l and corrupt. People thought I was a slacker in my advanced classes. Nearly every weeknight I worked from... Continue»
Posted by linmarris 1 year ago  |  Categories: First Time, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
630
  |  
75%
  |  3

humor


Softness and hardness
A man bumps against a woman in a hotel lobby. During the collision the elbow mound against the chest thereof. They are both surprised. The man turns to her and say,
"Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you will forgive me."
To which she replied:
"If your cock is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221."

Influantes Stats
A businessman boarded a train and finds himself sitting next to a beautiful woman. He notices that she is reading a book about sexual statistics. He asked about this, and she will answer:
"This is a very interesting book. So th... Continue»
Posted by bastos78 10 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
1849
  |  
75%
  |  1

My Naughty Confession 3 (My Teacher)

High school was a time when my sexual interests bloomed, sometimes feverishly, like most adolescents, I presume. I've had a lot of sexual interests towards the opposite sex, mostly for a bunch of my female classmates and my female teachers, most of whom I have actually had many sexual fantasies about. But unfortunately, they were mostly fantasies, and not exactly real sexual experiences, although I did find a few certain masturbation techniques that were useful.

Of all the ladies at my old high school that I've sexually fantasized about, there was one teacher that I will never ever forget. ... Continue»
Posted by enzoluciano 6 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
1546
  |  
75%

TYRONE TABOO

I hope I get it right this time. My politics are not for my entertainment. Still I'm not very good at being truthful about how I see the things going on in this world. I have been exposed to pornography in the past but I thought that my interest in it was only temporary, like the appearance of smoke from someone smoking a cigarette.
The smoke disappears from sight. That is how I dealt with pornography. I watched it and then threw it into the garbage. I exposed myself to it and then banished it from sight. I did not believe that I had a permanent interest in sexual hedonism, I told myself that... Continue»
Posted by Satan_Quin 2 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
2897
  |  
75%
  |  1

Christmas Holly

It was early Christmas morning; actually it was 1:30am, when Holly awoke and heard and rustle, she couldn`t place where it was coming from. Suddenly she spotted a figure emerge from around the bedroom door. She knew it wasn’t Luke as he had his firm cock nestled along the crack of her bum cheeks; Holly could tell Luke was dreaming of one of the video`s they had watched on xhamster last night.

Suddenly the figure approached the edge of the bed and you Holly saw that it was Flasher974 Santa; he was dressed in a full Father Christmas outfit with hat, beard, coat and red trousers and black sh... Continue»
Posted by flasher974 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
672
  |  
75%
  |  2

my girls asshole !!!

i am with my girlfriend six months and she is bi. she has a great body and firm breasts!! one thing that i did not like was her asshole.. it was hairy and i said to her that i did not like it and she said it was to awkward to shave that area and she asked me would i do it!!!! i asked her would she get her female friend to do it and let me watch!!!she was hesitant at first but then she quite liked the idea!! a weekend came and her bisexual girlfriend came over ... i popped the bottles of wine and one word led to another and before i knew it her girlfriend said she would shave it for her!(the wi... Continue»
Posted by drakesin 5 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
1199
  |  
75%
  |  3

I Really Must...

Time: 2030. Place: The northern side to the entrance of Ryde Harbour on the Isle of Wight.
From where I am, facing west, the most significant feature is Ryde Pier. The pier constructed in 1815 is the oldest pier in Britain. It is the fourth longest behind: Southend, Southport and Walton-on-Naze. It actually consists of three piers: one for the railway, another for a tramway - disused since 1969 and the busiest section which is utilised by pedestrians, cyclists and light traffic.
As I hold this in my minds eye a train rumbles down the tracks. The train has two coaches and is of ex London Unde... Continue»
Posted by Ima_Kant 5 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
1201
  |  
75%
  |  2

I dare you not to get wet ;)

Whether we'd be hanging out, on a date, or suddenly overcame by raging hormones or just having a good fuck, this is how i would proceed. Id like to think you are uncontrollably horny right now, and if your not i suggest you comeback later when you can play ;)

I would unzip my pants and pull the heavy denim down slowly so you could gaze upon my protruding long bulge. I would teasingly grasp the bottom of your dress and pull it up by your heaving breast, right below your now so aroused tender nipples. I would proceed to spot the damp section of your tight cotton panties. As my cock throbs wit... Continue»
Posted by longdocdong 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
570
  |  
75%
  |  2

My Crush Can Be So Cruel


I was 16 years old and eagerly awaiting the end of my school life, I had just a couple months left to go and couldn't wait to be free! Exams were just around the corner...

"You been talking to my boyfriend, bitch?" Charlene angrily asked, pushing me up against a tree in the back of the school yard. It was my favourite place to hang out with my friends as hardly any teacher would be there.

"What?!" I blurt out, stunned.

"I saw you talking to my boyfriend the other day!" She accused. I realised it's Mark she was talking about, he had been chatting me up a lot despite my obvious lack o... Continue»
Posted by LittleMissFart 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
1801
  |  
75%
  |  2

An SMS That Changed My Life



I was late for the office that day, in fact, I was late every day!I took my laptop bag and was rushing towards my car. Suddenly, my wife’s cell phone had a message alert that I didn’t care much about. I just said bye to her and zoomed away to the office.

I was stopped by the routine traffic and signals, and in fact, one signal was really more than 2 minutes! Suddenly, my thoughts went around the message alert and started thinking who could that be and just wanted to check it out of curiosity and rang my wife. For a surpris
... Continue»
Posted by swathi3 2 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
3879
  |  
75%
  |  1

How I Fucked My Virgin Maid And Made Her Pregnant



First let me tell you about myself. I am 20 years old and 5’10″ tall. I am a bit wheatish in complexion. My cock size is 7 inches.

The slut of this story is Krishna.

She is a very sexy girl about 2 years elder to me. She is very cute and fair and had a great curvy figure 34-28-38. Whenever she used to walk i always used to admire her ass swaying and i always fantasized about eating her ass and pussy and fucking her in doggy style but i had no courage to app
... Continue»
Posted by bava12 1 year ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
1242
  |  
75%