Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 102

Sex and Cops....fml

alright yall this is my 1st story dont hate but it fuckin sucked i tell you what.

my 9th grade year i was dating a cheer leader she was in her 12th year and i played Varsidy football 3A aka small town blah blah blah we fuck she loves me

now the story starting out the day i wake up and send her it was a snow and i wanted to see, we hung ou for most of the day we shot guns and did some other bull shit, but i had my DL and a truck ext cab ford ranger, i thought i was a bad ass but it had started to get dark so i parked to try to get my dicky shicky on a back ass gravel road, she wasnt much... Continue»
Posted by freek0418 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1184  |  
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Empty mind

I find myself tied. Bend forward, tied up to the top and tied down to a low table. I am kneeling with spread legs. I can`t move a little bit, it feels like I`m drawn in all directions. With my dick, my balls and my asshole exposed.

My arms tied to my back and to the top of the room, wich i can not see, because i am blindfolded. My upper body fixed in a horizontal position. I can`t even move my head. My mouthpussy is stuffed and spread open at the same time, by a ballgag with a cap.

With a mask that mutes my ears, i can`t find out whats going on around me.
As I hear near hollow voices an... Continue»
Posted by swissboy1984 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 719  |  
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my frist time and story

this is a story i want to tell and want you to write me back so i'm young and have a bf how loves to fuck so i said i'll suck your big rock hard dick. so as were sitting there i go on to xhamster to help him get his hard on.so as he gets his junk out i get the lub and get ready as all of his glory comse out i can't belive how increble big it is (frist time see one it real life) and i'm like oh my fucking good.

so i put the lub on its stuff that taest good so he starts to rub a bit and then my hand gose in and i touch and and its so hard and so BIG and i rub and rub some more and can't wait ... Continue»
Posted by cumlover99 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1307  |  
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Hidden desire

So as im sitting in my boss's house after a long day at work i sit down at a distant table away from him and his partner and do my regular internet routine, as in check e mails and look on facebook, but then one day i "stumble" upon this site or xtube and watch some videos.

As i watch the videos i get hard and start to jerk off. As my boss and his partner are watching tv i hit the poppers and rub my rock hard cock always getting so close to coming and then hold it as they get up and walk around the house.

His daughter (blonde gorgeous little 19 yr old college nerdy type, Great body a... Continue»
Posted by biandyoung91 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1259  |  
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One Steamy hot shower(True Story.

One day,back in the late 1980's. Lita not her real name,was running some errands,she finally done, and was heading her way to the bathroom to take her shower.Hanging her towel off the peg.She then remove her dress and undies wet and smelled from the sweat from the morning's work.
Turning the shower on,she got busy with her hair, untying the rubber band been clinging on.She wet her hair first and applied ample amount of shampoo,massaging her hair with the shampoo,she then rinsed it with the running shower beneath her.She bent her body onward to reach for the bath soap,she now applying the ... Continue»
Posted by constantienab73 1 year ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 739  |  
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THE WIVES SWITCH CLUB 2

THE WIVES SWITCH CLUB
PART 2

As tom and I drove home we didn’t say too much to each other it was strange as if we both felt guilty about what we had just done, as we arrived home Tom said do you want to talk about it “No not yet lets go to bed “ I needed Toms cock in me I could still feel James cum and I wanted to imagine Tom was James as he fucked me,
After sex I asked him how it had gone with Bee and he started to tell me in great detail I started to rub his cock while he told me what they had done together and to be honest I wasn’t really Listening I just wanted his cock hard again s... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 5 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 802  |  
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'Drop Your Trousers And Pants'

A few years back and I'm in the doctor's surgery - I have something that is worrying me.
My doctor is Indian, and charming, and for some reason he reminds me of Kenneth More.
‘Do you think you could just drop your trousers and pants please?’
I'm kind of uncomfortable with it but I comply nevertheless.
Whilst I do that he slips on a surgical rubber glove.
He comes up to me and gently feels around my testicles. I don't think he finds anything.
‘That reminds me’ He says ‘I must pick up some onion bhajis for tea.’
He pulls the glove of... Continue»
Posted by Ima_Kant 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 365  |  
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sharp exit nearly.

i was approached to attend a swingers party,
i agreed and took a girl,
little did i know id been set up,
as soon as i stripped off i was blindfolded and put in a dark room,
i realised i was not alone,
and a dog started licking my balls,NO I SHOUTED,
i got uptight and angry,
then the blindfold was taken off,
and i was in the middle of 3 fit women oiled up and mine to pleasure.... Continue»
Posted by tricepio 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 183  |  
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THE TUNNEL OF TERROR

THE TUNNEL OF TERROR
In the late summer, just before school started, Veronica always went to the state fair with her friends. This year she set off for the fair early one hot, summer morning with her friends, Jane and Diane. They laughed and talked all the two hour ride to get there. Arriving at the fair, they joined the crowd of people circling the dusty midway lined with food stands, rides, and other amusements. By late afternoon, the three of them were getting bored, until they stumbled across a freak show exhibit. They decided to try it and went inside the patched tent. It was dark insid... Continue»
Posted by JASON4VOORHEES2 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 933  |  
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The Really Popular Cunt?

Just me and her now; well, just me.

I gaze into her steel blue eyes to try and see her soul. I see nothing.

She blinks once.

I slap her hard across her left cheek with the palm of my right hand.

She sways and nearly over balances onto the bed.

It feels good to hit her. I like hitting and brutalising females; it's the only thing that really turns me on. I guess I'm a real nasty cunt.

She brings her hand up to her face to massage her cheek bone. I would like to believe that it really stung.

'Why did you do that?' She appears stunned, bewildered. And sounds[... Continue»
Posted by Kinky_Mushroom 8 months ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1567  |  
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Walking Dead Sex

Your all alone and sacred in the woods. It's been days since you got separated from your group. Your hungry, scared and and being followed by 3 walkers. As you try to run you trip over a fallen tree, you look up and a walker is almost on top of you. You close your eyes and wait for the bite the will turn you into on of them. Just as you have given up hope a gunshot rings out in the quiet forest and the walkers head explodes covering you in zombie filth. You turn to see who save you and there she is. One of the hottest girls you have ever seen. Two more shots ring out and the other walkers drop... Continue»
Posted by drew1207 13 days ago  |  Categories: Anal, BDSM, Sex Humor  |  Views: 729  |  
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Anne- the horny slut fucks with my dad

Everytime when my girlfriend anne was at my house she wanted to fuck. She was so horny all the time that i could not do anything else. THe way she suck my cock was so exciting. But with every blowjob my cock started to hurt more and more.




I coulndn't stop her anymore so I said: "Anne, go to my father. You can do it to his dick!" My dad was a horny man. He often fucked with many different sluts. He was such a man who said never no to any woman. So i Knew that Anne will be happy with him. "Wanna play with me?"

[... Continue»
Posted by jamescock 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1729  |  
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24

Ever hear that old rap song “It was a Good Day” by Ice Cube?

The song refers to that one inevitable day that every one has where everything goes “right”, you can’t make a mistake and you have the luck of the Irish.

Well, I recently had one of those days. It was probably one of the greatest days in my life.

For a little background on me (to put things in perspective) … I live and work in San Francisco. It’s a great city, but I have what is deemed bad karma. My friends tease me by calling me “Peter Parker” because I’m a little bit klutzy and always have some trouble with the ladies.
... Continue»
Posted by mondotoken 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 533  |  
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Britney Fucked In The Penthouse

Britney Fucked In The Penthouse

A few weeks ago my little s****r Kate, won first prize in a radio station's phone in competition. She was delighted as the prize was two tickets to meet her idol Britney Spears and she had to interview the pop princess for the radio station. My Mum wasn't going to let Kate go as neither Mum or Dad could get time off work to take Kate to the gig, and they would not let their 12 year old daughter to go on her own with out some one to take care of her.

I said that I would take her and Mum agreed to that as I was 19 and she always said I was very respo... Continue»
Posted by kepl6 1 year ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 19211  |  
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The Castaway

On a deserted Isle for f******n years
I thought I cried out all my tears
When from the surf one Monday morn
Came forth a beauteous female form

She wore a skin-tight diving suit
That touched where it fit from neck to boot
She walked toward me head held high
Her hand on the knife she wore on her thigh

“Tell me how long have you been here?”
She asked me, I answered trembling in fear
“f******n years, I’ve been here on my own
Starving reducing to just skin and bone.”

“Tell me how long since you had a smoke?”
She asked me “f******... Continue»
Posted by Nickshubby 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 508  |  
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The Wild Ride In The Air

The metal table was cold against my skin. My hands and feet were tied up and I was wearing a blindfold. All around me I heard voices, and the sound of people unfurling something they held in their hands.

That's when the whipping started.
******************************************************************
Flying Sucks!

I don't mean suck in a good way either. Flying sucks one hundred year old man asshole skank. The only thing I hated more than flying was living in the Southwestern USA.

"It's a dry heat," everyone says.

"Bull fucking shit!"

... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 480  |  
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What Cums Around

"No officer I'm not smuggling i*****ls, my girl friend's giving me head in
the car, OK? We have a law against cell phones and texting but there's nothing
that says you can't get blown while driving, right?!"
************************************************************************
Every time I fly into Tucson, the airport gets longer and longer.
It doesn't help no matter what airline I use they always wind up
at the gate furthest from baggage claim.

It's just as well Tommy didn't fly with me to Tucson. That would
be a little hard to expla... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 583  |  
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RIGHT PLACE BUT WRONG TIME..

I met this girl at the store about two weeks ago. We talked on the phone for awhile before she invited me to her house which was about an hour away. The next morning she picked me up and we went there. The girl didnt waste no time getting down to business. We fucked in the bed on the floor and in the shower.NOW this happend every day but one day i noticed these shoes and wondard to myself whose were they but i diddnt say anything. The next time i went routine as usual,we made it the shower and as im pounding her ass from behind someone walked in the bathroom guess what it was her boyfriend. He... Continue»
Posted by MJG007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 571  |  
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One-night stands more useful than you thought

Many surveys have suggested that the quality of a relationship is better for individuals who wait for things to get serious before having sex, in comparison to the those who become sexually involved right at the start. However, this new study found that a woman who is involved with a friend is 44 % more likely to stay committed and as for the men, the likelihood increases by 25%. If the same people were to get involved with a stranger or acquaintance, the odds increase by 30% for women and 43% for men.

"To have a meaningful relationship out of a one-night stand is absolutely wishful thinki... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 143  |  
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BJ At The Movies

I was at the movies with my GF and she just kept talking through the whole thing and it was starting to make me mad, then she started baging for some of the popcorn I had so I did the only thing I could think to do. I pulled out my dich g****d her head and shoved my dick down her throat. She gagged a little but then statred sucking like a pro. It felt great and I could enjoy the movie. When it was time for me to cum I pulled my dick out and came all over the popcorn, here you go bitch have some nice cum corn.... Continue»
Posted by ilovecougars69 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 860  |  
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