Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 9

My First time

We have all had a first time that said its easy for that to get eclipsed by better sexual experiences. But i think its still nice to remember, i was 19 and i wanted to really show my girlfriend at the time i was a awesome but had no idea how to. I was a newbie i was born with a nice cock but no knowledge of how to make it work. Well my girlfriend of the time helped me with that it was a tuesday i skipped out of class to meet her at a local pizza place where we dined and talked about music and i killed a spider next to her and joked about saving her life she shocked me when she said "well now i... Continue»
Posted by Realmeat 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 924  |  
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my lucky day and hers

i just sat there with my dick in my hand an my mouth open, there was my my bosses doughter on a sex cam site,telling every body how wet her pussy was .i didnt have my can on so she could not see me but i was scared to death,what if she some how found out i saw her ,well after watching her play with her tits wich are big an firm she lifted her skirt to show her pussy wich was trimend short an neat i was glad to see sum fur she slid a finger in the slit an it looked like she was looking me dead in the eyes an said i would love to find me a local man that could fuck my tight pussy an make his cu... Continue»
Posted by CUMSLINGER45 5 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3567  |  
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ivy league

IVY League Ch 1 I found this story on line

Rebecca Palmer was concerned about a couple of boys her son, Danny, has been hanging around with. Being on the PTA (Parent Teacher Association) board at his high school she knows a lot about the reputations of the students, so it concerned her when he hung out with the well-known trouble-makers. Danny is such a nice boy and didn't need those kinds of influences in his life, but it was so hard for her to prevent it.

Mike Brantley and Ben Thompson were the two boys Mrs. Palmer was concerned with. They were both eighteen year-old seniors at Parkvi... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 977  |  
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ivy league ch 2

"Umm... well," he hesitated only for a moment because he had his side of the story already figured out. He realized it would come to this, so he had a plan in mind. "Your son insisted that he come to the concert with us, even though we warned him to follow your rules. On the way to the concert he got pulled over for speeding. The cop searched your car and found his d**gs."

"My son doesn't do d**gs! He said those were yours!" she exclaimed.

"Sorry, but he's just trying to lay the blame on someone else," he replied smugly.

"How dare you accuse my son of being a liar," she said angrily.
... Continue»
Posted by bobbyblue53 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 391  |  
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PartyPlanning Chp1. Pt1.

Sarah...


"This feels great. The sun is not to hot on my skin but it's a bright clear day, the ladies are running like clockwork and so am I. Ten, I think ten moms have strolled by, just like yesterday. I'm so glad I decided to workout in my garage. Chicks love to see a man workout, especially a single guy like me. Last minute of my work out and this new workout DVD "Get Slim 4 Fem" Has me in top shape. And the host, Princess!, her highness. What a bitch but if I could fuck her I'd never stop. Last minute gotta focus...

10 m... Continue»
Posted by cohonjames380 5 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Shemales, Taboo  |  Views: 2460  |  
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Shaving

First time I tried it I almost bled to death, a Bic razor is useless, cuts down the base of my shaft and 7 or 8 on my sack, can you imagine trying to put band-aid on a scrotum
So Veet, jees that stuff burns, I looked like it had been napalmed lol, bright red sores and the pain well that's something else,
I really should have read the reviews first haha
this one had me in tears

Veet -- the Men Hair Removal Gel Creme (from hell) . . .
By John W. Osborne Jr. - 30 July 2012
After having been told my danglies (American: "dingle-berries") looked like an elderly rastafarian
... Continue»
Posted by adventure-seeker 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 933  |  
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My first sexual encounter with my cousin Rebecca

my cousin Rebecca and I are 9 years apart, she is 22 and I am 31, for as long as I could remember my cousin Rebecca would always fallowing my every foot step as we would play together in our grandparents back yard like a b*****r and s****r would, I always knew Rebecca loved me with a passion as I love that girl to and I would do anything for her as she would do the same, we have always been close to even this day where we share very intimate discussions of our life situations, she understands me and I understand her.

Rebecca and I have always been around each other till I hit the age of 13... Continue»
Posted by blackmomba213 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 6297  |  
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Hot Sexy Amanda

It was almost time to clock out when Amanda approached my cubicle “hey there”, now this girl only says hi or waves or simply ignores me… but today she is at my desk saying hello… “Hi” I replied, “wanna get a drink after work today?” WWHHOOOOAAAAA!!! Did she just ask me out for a drink?? She is THEE FINEST chic in the office, almost 5’8, bubble butt and a nice pair of tits, she could give a lot of models a run for their money, and did I say even the front of her pants looks pretty PHAT!! “Uh... yea... sure” I replied now horny as fuck “ok great… you’re driving Mr.” she said walking away, that a... Continue»
Posted by dlbiblkm 5 months ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 4707  |  
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BEST Job Interview

I got to the job interview early; I used the time to go over everything I think they would ask. The secretary called me in and showed me to the head HR lady’s office. She looked to be in mid to late 50s and didn’t even stand up to shake my hand… “Mr. Sam” she said pulling her glasses down slightly over the bridge of her nose “I regret to inform you that the position you applied for has been filled, we… tried contacting you by phone and via email, but none of them seemed to work … cause here you are” “I…”, “I’ll tell you what” she moved the papers that were in the middle of the desk to the left... Continue»
Posted by dlbiblkm 5 months ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 6299  |  
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Black Breeding Jocelyn


Jocelyn's hands shook as she wiggled her hips pulling
the tight dress up past her narrow waist. She gave one
last wiggle until she was able to lift the material of
her new green dress up and over her shoulders.

She pulled and tucked at the thin material making minor
adjustments here and there until the dress settled
perfectly on her gorgeous figure. She stepped over in
front of the mirror checking herself out. She gasped
when she saw her reflection as she starred studying the
way her new dress revealed her lovely breasts.

"Tom's not going to like this once he sees how m... Continue»
Posted by kinghut 5 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 949  |  
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Moisture

I think about meeting a dark, wild woman at a bar or a club. There is an immediate visceral attraction between us. We don't immediately succumb to it, however. We're both smart willful people and the control we have to exert makes the anticipation of what we both know is inevitable that much sweeter. We engage in that kind of masked erotic fencing people do in that kind of situation; looking at each other over the rims of our glasses, both getting somewhat buzzed, slowly losing the few inhibitions we started out with.

Finally we move to the dance floor, and the whole time she's looking at m... Continue»
Posted by blaster13101972 5 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1709  |  
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Who is she #1

Here we go.
I met a girl long ago she was engaged to another man, i had an intimate moments with her on a school trip I was a senior, we didnt go to the same school.
She called told me she was pregnant and I basically told her it wasnt mines and good luck. She was dismissed. Call me a jerk but she was engaged ( why was she calling me) her privates wasnt even tight for her to claim she was pure.
Years passed I tried calling to check on her, she married and moved. Good for her.

NY holiday season its busy, the lights are bright, ppl are shopping, ppl are working, the smell of tar, roasted... Continue»
Posted by 6775young 5 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 700  |  
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Mary's Furtive Flatulent Fetish Part 3


Mary and Angie continued to have weekly farting contests. Their weekly contests and gas inducing foods made them perpetually gassy. It seemed like neither Amy nor Mary could go 20 minutes without letting out some farts. Amy felt very comfortable around Mary, and passed gas freely around the dorm bedroom. Mary was still shy, and tried to let them out as silently as possible. Despite her best efforts, Mary usually couldn't let them out silently. She would shift her round plump ass, trying to let them out quietly, but usually failed to Angies great amusement. Angie would usually respond by lean... Continue»
Posted by ifm 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 438  |  
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Mary's Furtive Fetish

Mary was feeling a little worried. She was due to go to college in a couple weeks, which meant she had to move into the dorms.

"Can't I still commute from home?" Mary asked her parents.

"Oh no!" They said, "You wouldn't be getting the full college experience." They explained.

"Well," Mary tried, "Can I at least have a single dorm? How will I have any privacy if I share room with someone?"

"That's more expensive," They said, "And unnecessary, you'll make more friends and socialize more if you share a room with someone."

Mary valued her privacy and alone time. She was a straigh... Continue»
Posted by ifm 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 330  |  
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my travel

My Experience in London
What impressed me a lot were the buildings in London like the buildings along Regent Street & Oxford Street which are of typical British style.Even the common residential houses were so nice.But houses looked similar,it wasn't easy for me to find the right way every time.

When people are talking about U.K.,talking about London,they have to refer to Buckingham Palace,Tower of London National Gallery and the British Museum.Luckily,I visited all of these great sights.Now they are not only big names to me,but also a part of my experience,a part of my memory.

Buckingh... Continue»
Posted by GlamorBaby 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 673  |  
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My Virginity

I gave Gina another night of unbridled sex just to keep her quiet, during the lull while she tried to regain her breath and composure, she asked me about my virginity and how I lost it, she didn’t think it was with Maria and I had to agree, I told her about Mrs Harris, our neighbour when I lived at home with my parents, she was a friend to my mother and father, she was in her early thirties, my mother was quite a bit older but they got on well, she had three c***dren, two girls and a boy, she was quite a big woman in every way and as I found out later, very rarely wore any underwear so her vo... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 5 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3239  |  
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So there we were cyprus



So there we were, in the 1960`s 20 years old British soldiers, seconded to the UN in Cyprus for 6 months. The island was an island of two halves Greek and Turkish with a United Nations neutral zone known as the green line Twix the two sides, Both Greek and Turks had a fair size military presence, and the UN had contingents from Sweden, Norway, Ireland, Canada and the UK. Austrians supplied the hospital and the Finnish policed the job the British contingent supplied transport and logistics in UN colours and in addition the British had a garrison complete with hospital a port and an air... Continue»
Posted by alibodge 5 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1437  |  
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My D***k Mom

There was a knock on the front door. I was pretty sure who it was.

So let me set this up for you. If you’ve read my stories, you know that my wife, Janice and I, share our home and bed with my s****r Ginger. We’ve been living between Texas and Florida for the past few years, but Florida, where I grew up, was going to be our home from now on. And to put it plain, Florida is hot. It is hot in the winter, hot in the spring and fall. And it is really hot in the summer. Having grown up in the heat of Florida, clothes in our home are an option. Always have been, always will be. It’s so m... Continue»
Posted by abigfan 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 11816  |  
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A crossdrssserof Samurai

This is a story of a crossdresser of SAMURAI.
As you know,SAMURAI is a,as it wre, aknite in Japan of the feudal age.
And as you know,A corossdresser is not only a boy but agirl.
Kikyou Akizuki is a second princess of the Akizuki Castle.
But the prince of the inheritor has never born yet.
Then princess Kikyou, she was brought up as a prince
She is ,oh no, he is good at fighting of combat with sword, bow and arrow, spear, horseback.

One day he went for a trip for ascetic practices to become a stronger knight than now.
While a trip,he met a tipping gambler who is bullied by a group of ... Continue»
Posted by ladyassboy 5 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 72  |  
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Fucking The Boss

The following story starts a little slow but read to the end.
Tom Johnson squealed the tires on his BMW 7 series as he sped into his spot in the parking garage. Today was going to be a great day. First there was big deal that was finally going to close. That deal was going to make his year with over $500 thousand in commission. Of course there was Jim Rudolf to be taken care of and Tom was looking forward to that!

Tom strolled from his car into the high rise office and proceeded to his office. As he walked by the receptionist he noted that the new girl was kind if hot. He thought I may hav... Continue»
Posted by mooremike 5 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2689  |  
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