Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 81

The Italian job

The Italian job.

For many years I have worked abroad installing plant and equipment around the world, one such job was situated in a small village in Italy, I will not give the name to protect the innocent etc.
My lunch was normally a sandwich and a beer prepared by one of the factory ladies which I normally ate beside the machines that I was installing, there were a couple of people in the factory who could speak a few words of English but the company had got a young girl the daughter of one of the women in the factory who spoke good English to interpret for me, when working abroad I try ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1020  |  
93%
  |  4

The Italian job

The Italian job.

For many years I have worked abroad installing plant and equipment around the world, one such job was situated in a small village in Italy, I will not give the name to protect the innocent etc.
My lunch was normally a sandwich and a beer prepared by one of the factory ladies which I normally ate beside the machines that I was installing, there were a couple of people in the factory who could speak a few words of English but the company had got a young girl the daughter of one of the women in the factory who spoke good English to interpret for me, when working abroad I try ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 281  |  
100%
  |  2

Theatrical....2

Theatrical … 2

You remember at the end of “Theatrical” how I told you that I had not seen the guy from the theatre since he fucked me in the disabled toilets and how much he meant to me, how I had been looking out for him, well!! I’ve seen him again,…… yes!!, in the city with his wife, I was walking through one of the arcades and I spotted him in front, he is really easy to notice because he is so tall, well my heart stopped when I realised it was him but then I thought “how can I make him see me, maybe he has been looking for me, I have got to make him see me, make eye contact” so I turned... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 222  |  
100%
  |  2

A Day in the park or How NOT to take sexy self pot

A couple days ago I was feeling kind of bad because I had dumped on a guy I had been chatting with. I started thinking, what could I do to make it up to him. Suddenly I knew, I'll take some pictures just for him! It was a nice day outside so I thought - an outdoor shoot would give both of us a thrill! He knows I tend to be an exhibitionist so I ran upstars and picked out my outfit. I choose a short blue jean skirt and T-shirt with no panties, partly to get me in the mood and partly because I knew he would like the view.
I planned on doing it in my backyard but as I went to the back doo... Continue»
Posted by uwqgqfrm 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 461  |  
92%
  |  11

Sex secrets sure to drive him wild!

When it comes to sex and for*play, men think differently and so do women. What may work for the goose, may not necessarily work for the gander as well, and so to have sex that is thrilling, memorable and completely au naturale for both, men let women onto their secret fantasies!

Action: Pretend to not want to make-out. Keep your lips closed and clench your legs together.

Effect: Once he notices that you are not kissing him back, he will realise you are up to something. His kiss will become passionate as he will try to pry your mouth open. Fighting for it brings on an exhilarating primal ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 326  |  
70%

How to maintain a healthy sex drive

Obesity, diabetes, high bl**d pressure, thyroid dysfunction, adrenal exhaustion, poor nutrition, prescription medications, hormonal birth control, too much stress and too little sl**p. Many factors determine a healthy sex drive and today we're looking at what determines a healthy sex drive and how to maintain it.

Factors that determine a healthy sex drive
Sex hormones – For women both estrogen and testosterone at healthy levels are very vital in maintaining libido as well as fertility. In men too, testosterone is vital. Men with clinically defined low libido are often diagnosed with low ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 258  |  
80%

10 strange facts about kissing

Think you know a thing or two about kissing? You probably do. But the facts below are so off the beaten path, we’ll bet you don’t know them all—and they could come in handy. Not only could they provide some steamy “Did you know…?” chit chat, but they’ll help you see all the benefits a satisfying lip lock can bring into your life. Happy smooching!

1. Two out of every three couples turn their heads to the right when they kiss.

2. A simple peck uses two muscles; a passionate kiss, on the other hand, uses all 34 muscles in your face. Now that’s a rigorous workout!

3. Like fingerprints or ... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 430  |  
87%

Sex-facts' you never knew

1. Globally, lovers are having sex 139 times a year. The French are the lovemaking pacesetters, according to the Durex Global Sex Survey 2002, coming in at 167 times each 365 days.

2. Condoms are biodegradable — some of them. Lambskin and latex condoms are biodegradable, but polyurethane condoms aren't.

3. Sex-enhancing CDs are being sold for setting the mood. Try some classical options to rock your world: Shacking Up to Chopin, Making Out to Mozart and Bedroom Bliss with Beethoven are available.

4. Don't douche — it's not recommended anymore. Douching washes away the healthy bacte... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 394  |  
50%

STREET STORIES: Malina and her Dogs

MALINA
By Webb


After finishing my time in the service I came back to Tampa this was mid ’97. My b*****r introduced me to his circle of friends and I hit off with all of them pretty well. They all smoked a ton of weed and back then they were heavy into video games. I’m no gamer but it was good company at the time. We would all congregate at a guy named Jeff’s house. People would fall through the spot, rollup and listen to good hip-hop.




There were a few girls that would come through the spot as well and one of them was Malina. Malina was white about 26 years old with shoulder le... Continue»
Posted by webborelly 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1091  |  
86%
  |  4

My girlfriends mother Part 6

My girlfriends mother Part 6

It seems like you are enjoying my adventures with my girlfriend’s f****y so I will give you one more then that’s the finish.

I have already told you how horny and raunchy my girlfriend Gillian can get especially when we are out and how I took Ruth to a club in Leeds and how Pam can get so possessive and how it has been bothering me.

Again it was Wednesday afternoon and I was sitting on the couch on the lounge with Ruth watching TV, she was sitting on my left with my left arm around her shoulders and her left leg d****d over the arm of the couch so her legs... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1106  |  
99%
  |  2

My girlfriends mother Part 5

My girlfriend’s mother part 5

This story is the very strangest of all and it involves the promise I made to my girlfriends mother Ruth to e****t her s****r Sarah to Edinburgh to a conference, last episode I left you having just completed a night out on the town where Ruth got fucked and so did I but not by either Ruth or my girlfriend Gillian.

The f****y had been a bit vague about the arrangements for the trip as I said last time but I just put it down to women’s organising something and thought “ if it goes pear shaped I’ll pick it up as I go along” Sarah was supposed to be arriving at ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 7565  |  
97%
  |  9

Lets Meet

WE TALKED ON THE PHONE AND YOU SOUNDED NERVOUS....TALKING MUCH SHIT TO A GIRL.....TELLING ME WHAT ALL YOU WOULD DO TO THE PUSSY..IM LIKE YEAH RIGHT ANOTHER MAN TELLING ME THAT THEY ARE GOING TO HIT IT LIKE IT NEED TO BE HITTED....

SO I SAT THERE LISTENING TO YOU BLOW ALL THIS STEAM OUT OF YOUR MOUTH...THEN FINALLY I ASK YOU WAS YOU THROUGH USING UP YOUR ENERGY TALKING...YOU SAID HUH...I SAID ARE YOU THROUGH USING UP ALL OF YOUR ENERGY TALKING....

YOU ASK ME WHY..I SAY TO YOU PUT UP OR SHUT UP...PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE YOUR MOUTH IS....YOU GOT QUIET....I SAY DONT GET QUIET NOW...YOU WAS TALK... Continue»
Posted by ladytrucka42 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 605  |  
96%
  |  7

Buffalo and Shanti and Erin! Oh My!

PRINCE GEORGE, BRITISH COLUMBIA - My name is Erin. I'm an 18 years old girl living in Montana. Right now i'm on the home stretch of a road trip through British Columbia, the Yukon and Alaska. It was just me and my cat Tiger when i started the trip. Now Shanti, my new pregnant girlfriend (8 months), is with me on the way back home. Shanti just ditched her boyfriend. His name is Buffalo.

*********

I first met Buffalo and Shanti in the town of Whitehorse in the Yukon. Buffalo is 25 years old and Shanti is 21 years old. They made a striking couple in the laundromat where we met. Both of them... Continue»
Posted by teengirerin 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1423  |  
97%
  |  47

My girlfriends mother part 4

My girlfriend’s mother, Part 4

Those of you who have been following my adventures with my girlfriend’s f****y will by now know all the characters so I will not go over them again if not then I would suggest that you go to the original and start there.

My next story has quite a few different facets that I hope you will enjoy.

It starts with one of my visits to service my girlfriends mother one rainy Wednesday afternoon, we were relaxing after the first frenzied session and were sitting up on the bed, we were both naked and she was sitting on my cock rocking gently, I was laying half ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1883  |  
100%
  |  2

My girlfriends mother part 3

My girlfriend’s mother….. Part 3.

If you have been keeping track of this story which I hope you have and have given it good marks then you will by now know the characters involved but just to recap, Gillian is my girlfriend, Ruth is her mother, Pam is her aunt/cousin and Grace is her other aunt and the eldest s****r to Ruth.

During part two I mentioned that Pam had broached the subject of Anal sex, I skirted around it a bit because it would have made that part far too long and you might have been asl**p before half way but I will now go into more detail and tell you what happened.
As I ... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1670  |  
98%
  |  1

My girlfriends mother

My girlfriend’s mother

You have all read stories about girlfriend’s mothers and mothers in law etc. well here is another that tells the tale of a lady who later became my mother in law for the selfish reason that I enjoyed the close relationship with both her and her s****rs as well as the girlfriend who later became my wife.

I had been going out with Gillian for about 2 months when her father ran off with his girlfriend and set up home on the south coast of England, wife and daughter were devastated, I couldn’t understand it because Ruth, Gillian’s mother was a fabulous looking woman, g... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 3836  |  
97%
  |  11

My girfriends mother part2

My girlfriend’s mother ……part 2

You remember that in the first part I was going out with a girl called Gillian and that I had fucked both her mother and her aunt in a session of debauchery that lasted all afternoon, if you have not read it I suggest you read it first because this second part is not as long but has a lot of strong connections to the first apart from the link of Gillian and her mother.

I made regular visits to the house to service the two ladies, Gillian’s mum had to be on a Wednesday afternoon because of her working in the shop and Wednesday was the only day she got off a... Continue»
Posted by the_priest 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 1335  |  
93%
  |  3

His Thumb Sized Dick...His HUGE Load!

I met a guy in HS and we became friends instantly. Over the years we tried to date on and off, but it never really got anywhere.

We started seeing eachother regularly one year and one night our hormones got the best of us. We kissed every once in a while, but whenever I would reach for his dick he would pull away and say he had to leave...not this time! He kept telling me how bad he wanted to fuck me and I was so curious as to why he kept his dick all to himself for so many years?

He asked me how wet I was as we sat in the car trying to figure out where we were going to go for the even... Continue»
Posted by PeircedPlumpPleasure 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1817  |  
96%
  |  21

The surrogate


Milly inseminated

"Ah Mr and Mrs Jameson. I'm Drss. Dragonmage, but my friends call me Misty."
"Hi I'm Don and this is my good wife Melinda."
The handshakes were firm and purposeful.
"Please take a seat, while I explain the procedure to you."

She waved towards two chairs across her desk. "Would you like a coffee before we start?" "I'm too excited for coffee I'm afraid." Melinda giggled.
Drss.Dragonmage smiled. "That's perfectly natural, after all it is your first time. Now as you already know we aim to ensure that the host is as perfect a match as possible. Which is why w
... Continue»
Posted by MzTania 3 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 518  |  
92%
  |  3

That particular morning

Everyday I'd wake up around 7 am and take my morning dump, usually I'd read the newspaper sometimes I'd only have time for a quick one so it was a hastily achieved f***ed one, kind of dump that just shoots straight out which isn't fun when it's not solid as it covers the bowl like that time at my mother-in-laws when I forgot to flush after eating some bad fish.

Any who.

After my dump my wife (Gazzel) would have breakfast waiting for me at about 07:45-08:00, she'd always cook me something good like fried food with a side bowl of healthy cereal which I had the choice to eat but never did ... Continue»
Posted by TheShalong 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 338  |  
30%
  |  1