Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 8

Hell Hath No Fury Like a Husband Scorned.....

A husband comes to grips with infidelity and seeks revenge.

Bill Trebelov stood frozen and helpless, watching his beloved wife snuggle warmly into the arms of their next door neighbor, Roger. Emily smiled so brightly, she seemed to illuminate from within. She wore a flimsy yellow sundress that left little to the imagination. Her shapely body fit perfectly in Roger's embrace, as if they were two pieces of a puzzle.

They were laughing, surrounded by friends and neighbors with familiar, yet strangely indistinguishable, faces. Roger whispered something into Emily's ear, and it ... Continue»
Posted by magas911 6 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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What a wake up call

I've been up all night studying for an exam I have coming up in psychology and I've fallen asl**p at the desk it's been a long night and I'm so tired I can resist anymore so I just lay back and fell asl**p in the chair.
I'm having an amazing dream you have came back home and have stripped naked and are slowly rubbing my cock in my boxers. The dream feels so real it's so goddamn good. I open my eyes and see your head in my lap bobbing up and down as you suck on my cock it feels so good you notice I've woken up and look me in the eye and you continue to suck my cock I reach down and start to r... Continue»
Posted by scottishlegend 6 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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How we met - She got the magic juice (Part 1)

Memories of a girlfriend from the 80's - How we met

We met at a disco. She was together with a friend having some fun in town. We started talking and after a short time we went to the dance floor - She danced very close and I gave up trying to hide that I had a hard on and started to push my leg between hers when dancing around - She gave me a knowing smile and we had another few dances.
It was hot and the music was very loud inside the disco and we decided to get some fresh air - She went to her friend and whispered something and we went outside in the nice summer night.

Outside we ... Continue»
Posted by drbimmer1965 6 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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I think I might be the dirtiest girl on x-Hamster

You acquire habits from watching porn if you watch it enough. Like, I’ve been into wearing socks during sex. I must have seen it in a porn video recently. Any socks will do but coloured ones are best, and not short ones—socks that go up the calf a little. Thick ones. Knee socks, of course, especially mid thigh ones, wow, they make my pussy wet. Makes me feel younger, like a little girl starting all over.

I like most porn categories. I like lesbians. I like strippers. I like socks. I like babysitters. I like The Milton Twins. I like lap dances. I like swingers. I like room mates. I like b***... Continue»
Posted by Fridagirl 6 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Just twenty four hours

I'm hoping that writing this will help get it out of my mind. Not so much a story as a fantasy, with no real end, but I'd love to hear ideas to help continue my thoughts
OK, last year I was in Lanzarote and mainly went to one bar. It wasn't a gay bar as such but the guys I met were. The main 2 were about 50. Maybe mid 50s. Just normal guys. One quite tall and the other pretty chubby. I'm thinking the tall guy is quite well hung, but nothing too huge, and the chubby guy a bit smaller.
So, anyway, its set there. Or with those 2 guys anyway.

I admit my darkest fantasy and we agree to carry ... Continue»
Posted by flashman1807 7 months ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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You have to love it. You’re about to leave work on a Friday evening. You’ve tidied up your desk a bit so things are in order on Monday. Check your phone for messages to finalize your plans for that night. You’re all amped up for whatever the weekend may bring and then wham! Your boss drops a stack of legal documents an inch high that needs to be proof-red right away. Would love to grab him by the belt and throw his ass out of the god-damned window…. Wave bye-bye as he screams for 18 stories. But I have bills to pay, so it looks like his feet will stay on solid ground.

So that was my... Continue»
Posted by cookiemonster50 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Friends with benefits Part TWO (Edith)

this is the second part of my fantasy....

It took me about 3 minutes to decide what matching set I was going to wear for the night out with my friend. I found a very sexy Simone Pêrele satin demi bra with its matching thong, that was my choice, I turned around to my friend which was in her "born suit" and "I CHOOSE THIS ONE... you sexy bitch!"

She gave me the ok look, "lets get dress first and then I am going to put you make up, I have couple of ideas, do you mine if I take pictures.....hahahahah whom I am k**ding, I am going to take tons of pictures, my sexy friend.

I ... Continue»
Posted by ilialenyc 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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'Twas the Night Before New Years'

‘Twas the night before New Years,
The lights were turned dim,
Every person was stirring,
Especially Kim.
Her stockings were black
And clung to her thigh.
She sat on her bed
And let out a sigh.
Her thoughts were all filled
With what was to cum.
She knew it’d be her
And for sure more than one.
She picked out her panties
Matching bra trimmed in lace.
Turning to the mirror
With a smile on her face.
She liked what she saw
Indeed it was HOT!
She could not resist
But to reach for her spot.
The hairs on her neck
Beginning to stand.
She imagined herself
On a beach of white sand.... Continue»
Posted by h2olover 7 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Friends with benefits, part ONE (Edith)

This is a fictional story.

My cell rang with a familiar melody, I picked it up and looked at the screen. It was my friend Edith. I answer it and her voice on the other end said, "do yo want pizza and a fuck?"

I just giggle, "damn woman...." Then she interrupted me... "what don't you like pizza???" She cracked up...

"Hey I am in the neighborhood, mind if I stop by?" Edith said.

"No worries, bring some beer, real beer, no Coronas."

"Ok, will be there in a few."

This woman has been my friend ... Continue»
Posted by ilialenyc 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
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Office Environment and Fast Anal Sex

Call me a modern girl, I like sex, teasing, drinking, sex, men, more sex, and of course those facials, the dirty kind I blogged about earlier.

In the office the other day, I was greeted with a glass of champagne instead of my Espresso.

Dave, the copier guy snucked a bottle in, and as we stood in the small coffee room and poured me a second glass, he admitted he thought about me, behind his wife's back.

That should have sent my feminine alarm bells ringing, but strangely it made my morning pussy twitch, something most husbands know that females are partial to a morning shagging, 'I hop... Continue»
Posted by Fridagirl 7 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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A Shortie for Susan - Part 2

Andy was in the shower stroking his cock, remembering the amazing fuck with his Math Tutor Bendy Bindi yesterday afternoon. In his imagination he could still feel her hot thighs pressing into his arse and her hands pinning back his ankles as she took him in the Amazon position. Just when he couldn’t imagine it getting any hotter, Susan his step-mum appeared in the shower, standing behind him, pressing her tits into his back and gripping his slippery cock.

“What are we going to do with you, you naughty boy? I bet you’re thinking about fucking that Indian slut Bindi again. Well ... Continue»
Posted by dasx2 7 months ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  

That's What He Said

I saw a brown man sitting on the back step of a lorry in the drizzle of an English music festival. It was Thursday morning, the 27th of August 2015.

''Would you like some rum?” were the first words he said to me. A lot more words followed over the course of a very d***ken weekend.

“I have a girlfriend. She's called Scarlett... I love her, I think. I mean, she's really hot. She's an 18-year-old online stripper you see... bit of a nightmare though, she's really c***dish.”

“What do you expect from an 18-year-old?” I laughed. “How old are you?”

“32. I was born on Christmas Day 1982. I ... Continue»
Posted by GeorgiaSalim 7 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  

All These Years!

We finally talked 15 years after the divorce.

Much of what is here is fiction. It is set in an alternate universe where the laws are slightly different. If any of you is a lawyer and would like to correct on legal facts, please go ahead. Just remember, this story is not about reality. This story is for the enjoyment to those who have been duped and plundered by cheating bitches and honorable courts.

She got down from her car and walked towards the house. She is not as beautiful as she was once. She is not as young as she was once either. She, however, is still the same bitch who p... Continue»
Posted by magas911 7 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  

Thanks to a First Aid Course and the Twins

My thanks to a First Aid Course and the Twins (full story)

For those who don’t like long stories, I’m sorry but I hope you all enjoy.

Chapter 1

We’ve just finished an excellent meal at our favourite restaurant. My wife is sliding out of her chair as I pay the bill. Sam has a great body, even at 45. Tonight her dress is a striking little red number. The length is respectable but the cleavage displayed is outrageous. Her exposed bosom guaranteed us excellent service. I complement her once more for her stunning outfit. I can’t wait to get her home and her out of it – that’s another sto... Continue»
Posted by CanoePirate 7 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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just something everyone should know

'Revenge porn' i*****l under new UK law
13 October 2014
From the section Technology
Revenge porn concept imageImage copyrightPA
Image caption
The distribution of images and videos can be reported directly to the police
People who post so-called "revenge porn" pictures and videos on the internet could face two years in jail under a new law.
The new Criminal Justice and Courts Bill will have an amendment dealing specifically with the practice.
"We want those who fall victim to this type of disgusting behaviour to know that we are on their side," said Justice Secretary Chris Grayling.
P... Continue»
Posted by jenni_serves 7 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  

"A Dream I Had"

"A Dream I Had"

"Just had a dream last night that felt like the most wonderful feeling I have ever felt. Have you ever dreamed & wished that you would never want to wake up? I did. I didn't want to wake up at all. The dream was about myself of course & a person, which I will not name at this point. But the dream s... Continue»
Posted by dateman303 7 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  

A Shortie for Susan

Susan arrived home late from a hard day at the office – well her boss had been hard most of the morning, staring down the top of her dress.

Susan expected Andy – her 16-year old step-son to be studying hard for his maths exam next week.

Susan didn’t expect to see Andy with his hand down the front of the pale blue jeans of a very attractive 20-something Indian beauty. She was his maths tutor – she had short-cropped black hair, sensuous brown skin and a wicked smile. Her tight white jumper, pulled up over her small breasts exposed a swathe of flat brown abdomen leading the eyes down to a d... Continue»
Posted by dasx2 7 months ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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A Girl alone in Rome, with 4 large cocks.

A little message to you the readers.

I am a girl, a female, I have tits and a pussy, and I love porn. OK we have that tiny piece of gender out of the way. I like to try to please, and to those men I shall never meet, I want to seduce you with my words and dirty thoughts, just to show you we girls like a bit of fun too.

Admittedly we are the receivers, we let you put your cocks inside us and thrill to feel your seed try to impregnate us, it's a big gamble but it's a big part of the dominance theme, to allow a man to 'Bareback' you, and walk home feeling his semen run out of ... Continue»
Posted by Fridagirl 7 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Seduced by My Ex-Girlfriend's Mom

My name is John. I have always been a fairly well-balanced, healthy, and All-American boy. Six-two, 185 pounds, athletic body, blond hair, blue eyes. Good f****y, normal relationships, all that jazz. When I was 27 years old I met and became involved with a girl named Jen. She was 22 at the time. The relationship started off with a bang and was balls to walls all the way. She was a piece of work. After about a year the ride got a little too wild and I jumped off. I broke up with her. But things got even wilder after that.

Jen was very attractive. Maybe 5-6, thin frame, sexy long legs, good r... Continue»
Posted by Itheswag 7 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Sex in the Car and Getting Caught!

This actually happened and is 100% real! The location is Ontario Airport in Ontario CA.

I had just come home from a business trip and after a week was hornier than hell. This was in 2000, I was 42 at that time so was my wife. I had to travel maybe 4-6 times a year and really did not like it.
We had a little phone sex while I was gone and she always knew each time I traveled that I wanted her to "dress up" in some new sexy lingerie to meet me at the airport. I was always excited to see what new "uniform" or outfit she would be wearing, plus it added to our already large sexy lingerie coll... Continue»
Posted by coolboomer 7 months ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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