Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 67

Small dick laughed at by 2 nurses

A friend of mine is a doctor and as part of her training she did a stint in the sexual health wing of the hospital she was working in. She is a very game girl constantly regaling us with tales of funny medical incidents. She told me about games she and her colleagues played to keep themselves amused and spirits high while working in quite a gritty environment.

She said they had a hilarious time asking really intimate questions because people would answer 100% honestly (very eye opening she said).. other guys would treat it like counselling and the moment the door shut on the examination r... Continue»
Posted by peteash 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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a fairy tale

Buntylocks and the 3 blings


by hands christmaspud handyman



here is the story of Buntylocks and the three blings



once upon a time there were 3 young boys (alright Bunty, dont fucking piss yourself it's only a fairy tale and i am permitted a degree of licence) all named bling



first there was lil' bling, he was all small and adorable and i am sure tasted absolutely divine

next there was med' bling, he only came out when Buntylocks was around and although larger than lil' bling he was still nothing to write home about

finally there was xxl' bling, he was massive i... Continue»
Posted by bling5217664 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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One Hot Showertime. (True story)

One day,back in the late 1980's ,Lita not her real name,was running some errands,she finally done, and was heading her way to the bathroom to take her shower.Hanging her towel off the peg.She then remove her dress and undies wet and smelled from the sweat from the morning's work.
Turning the shower on,she got busy with her hair, untying the rubber band been clinging on.She wet her hair first and applied ample amount of shampoo,massaging her hair with the shampoo,she then rinsed it with the running shower beneath her.She bent her body onward to reach for the bath soap,she now applying the soa... Continue»
Posted by constantienab73 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Future Fuckin' - Fiction

January 5, 2113
Today was better than yesterday, at least. I was only f***ed to ejaculate seven times, compared with the 12 times I had to endure yesterday. I'm not sure what they think they're doing to me, but I know that if they keep it up, my balls will run permanently dry. They already feel like a couple of dust bunnies and I'm only halway through the week!

January 6, 2113
I was talking to a new "recruit" today about what's been going on outside these walls since I got here a year ago. Apparently, not much has changed. The Worldwide Overpopulation Mitigation And Neutralization program... Continue»
Posted by femalesonly 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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the boy was now a man. pt 1

A fictional story of a boys fantasy

As a youg lad growing up in a major female house,2 s****rs Candy 20 and sophie 18, I was always curious about the female body and often researched this on the net (watching porn really) I learnt that by looking at women clothed it wasnt much fun but by seing them partly clothed or naked, thats where the fun begins, I did some home study on this observing my s****rs undress, fuck and materbate some call it perving I wold rather like to think it was observation, also I had observed, that older women where hornier and more you observe the harder your cock ge... Continue»
Posted by rodma 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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The New Sexual Awakening: Part 2

Trevor opened his eyes as the first rays of the Morning sun streamed through the open blinds.

"Did that really happen?" he asked himself. A quick glance at the bed next to him revealed Brad's lady friend Mandy, nude lying facedown in the bed. Trevor placed his hand on the small of her back and as he felt the warmth of her soft skin the events of the previous night came flooding back.

He noted that she couldn't have been less interested in him, and that it wasn't until he removed his glasses and looked at her with his naked eyes that she became sexually aroused. Perhaps the Crystallized... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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First Fuck Flop (Non-fiction)

Every word of the following first-hand account is true, as best I can remember:

It was the summer of '91, and I had recently moved to Lancaster, CA from Northern California. I was 16 years old, and horny as hell pretty much all the time. If you've read my other true story about my first orgasm, then you know that this story begins about two years after that.

I ran with some "interesting" people when I was younger...pretty much anyone I might meet at a party, at a dealer's house, perhaps at school when I wasn't ditching, etc...and even though I wasn't a bad looking guy, and ... Continue»
Posted by femalesonly 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Tow the Line: Part 2 "Party Where Your Heart

As I Stepped inside the J Dorm I could tell all eyes were on me. As I dodged awkward glances and pointed jabs I happened to catch a glimpse of Audrey leaning against a back wall.

"Hey Trash Can Guy!" she shouted waving me over.

"Sorry I never asked your name." she added as I crossed over.

"It's Nicholas Frost, most people call me Nick." I said lying...well not exactly, more like half truthing. Nicholas is my Middle Name, my first name is Calvin after President Coolidge (Don't ask me why).

"Nick I wanna properly introduce you to some friends. You met Damon already." she said poi... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Porno Party?????

I very rarely go to parties.

Most of the time I think of going to parties as some sort of a chore that I have to do for the person that I like that’s throwing the party, or the person that wants me to come with them. It’s just so hard for me to find interesting people to talk to, and I’m terrible about forcing a fake conversation. I just can’t do it anymore.

The only time parties are really fun for me besides the rare time when I get to talk to someone interesting, is when something fucked up happens.

So when I got a call from one of the guys I do jiu jitsu with, asking me if I wanted... Continue»
Posted by a_chord90 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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The New Sexual Awakening

Most guys lose their Virginity in High School, Trevor Smalls wasn't most guys.

A meek and reserved young man, Trevor had a tendency to fade into the background wherever he was, the one exception being the Chemistry Lab that was where he burned hotter than his Bunsen Burner.

Being from a modest background made socializing at Pinkerton University especially difficult, as many of the affluent students didn't take to kindly to mere Scholarship students attending their school.

But Trevor saw an in, a way of making his financial and socially difficulties vanish, the Janice Prize.

The ... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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subprize !!!!!!!!

A BIG SUBPRIZE FOR US

here is a store for you and you all, all ways have a great day...

mmmmmm OH Honey, you make my dick so hard just thing of kissing your beautiful lips with our tongues which are touching and mangling together like to lovers all wrapped together with our hands, arms, legs holding and rubbing each others naked bodies. We are as one person, a body of warm heated love mass. When all in a split secant my dog jumps up on to our bed. He pushes his noise in between our bodes, touch our breast and nipples, rubbing your hard nipples between my fing... Continue»
Posted by diggersam 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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A story for the holidays

Christmas is a time of joy and happiness, OR boredom and loneliness.

Let me back up a bit, Christmas time, three years ago, sometime during the night, my cock was running in and out of Anna's pussy. It was all wet down there, well lubricated and it was fun. I was kissing her shoulder, fiddling her titties and ramming her pussy with my cock. Back, forth, back, forth, ... Anna turns over, she kisses me on the lips and starts sucking them. I am fingering her around her butt hole and spreading her butt cheeks while pushing her lower body to rub her pussy on my body. We didn't do it anally excep... Continue»
Posted by happytaquito 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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In the Alps

As we step through the door, all heads turn towards us. Entering the restaurant, we are able to see down the Austrian Alps peak to a large lake. The view from the cable car ride was spectacular but the one from the summit is unrivaled as it is a panoramic view of the region. The headwaiter greets us and with a smile asks if we have a reservation. I reply with my last name. He locates it on his guest list and leads us to our table.

My tailored silk suit is dark gray with trousers breaking atop well-shined black leather shoes. A silk Jerry Garcia tie compliments the colors of the suit. I a... Continue»
Posted by tigerx1 3 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Pink Christmas

Delivering gifts was always a joyous event for Santa, but 2012 was a very trying year. His wife of almost 700 years had died in July and add to that the population boom he was giving out more gifts than ever before. On this particular Christmas Eve he had just cleared Asia and was crossing the Pacific ocean with his Reindeer set on California. As the came in low over Los Angels he landed on the roof of a beautiful mansion.

"Sara Jennings, age Six a "Barbie Dream House".

With a wink and a nod he fizzled into a cloud of red dust and flew down the chimney.

He materialised in a large l... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Breakup sex with my girlfriends s****r

The day was not starting out very well for me. As I walked out to my car I found a note on the windshield from my girlfriend Sheila. In her note she said she was breaking up with me. She didn't give a reason, just that we were through and she was moving on. This upset me quite a bit and I couldn't imagine what could have possibly brought this on. In hopes of getting an answer and maybe setting things right again I jumped in my car and headed for her house. As I drove I tried to think it through, Sheila and I had been together for nearly a year, and we always did things together going out to ea... Continue»
Posted by querico44 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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My friend Jerry returns

Jerry and I had been friends since we were nine or 10 years old, we played together, and learned about girls together over the next couple years as we started puberty. Whenever we were alone together we would talk about girls and get so horny and masturbate together. I don't remember exactly when, but at some point we both became curious and began to wonder what it was like to touch another guys cock and so it began as we explored each other. We both found it very exciting to touch and play with each other and before long we were giving each other blow jobs. I really liked taking Jerry's soft ... Continue»
Posted by querico44 3 years ago  |  Categories: Gay Male, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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mmm

Wow, that was pretty exciting," Sue said when he had disappeared. "I didn't realise what a randy sod you are, Steph. You wouldn't think that you only started frigging around today."

"Maybe, but I've been feeling like it for weeks. You know, I could easily let some bloke have a proper eyeful of my fanny, without any knickers in the way, I mean. They may as well be off, because they're saturated in any case. I'm really juicing up."

"Me too, but I don't know that I could just flash my fanny in cold bl**d as it were. Once we pull some bloke though, no problem."

"Tell you what, let me take... Continue»
Posted by foreignera 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Playing Along

In my defense… all this was only supposed to be just a harmless little prank and I really didn’t intend on things going as far as they did but… look, first let me explain what happened and you tell me if I was wrong.

I’m Ethan, a few years ago when I was 19 I was invited by my friend Kamario also 19 at the time, to spend the holiday weekend with him and his f****y at their home, it nothing fancy or over the top it was just a three day weekend in a small town in North East California with my friend and his f****y. Kamario and I arrived at his f****y house early Friday afternoon; his mother g... Continue»
Posted by Rust1 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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A Trip To The Mall Proves Messy

I really hate going shopping around the holidays. My wife has shopping lists the length of her arm and sometimes if I don’t go with her she’ll spend money like there’s no tomorrow. But I can only take so much walking around in those damn malls. I can’t keep my damn eyes focused on where I am supposed to be going and wind up walking into other people because of all the damn eye candy in the damn place. I have never seen so much damn young pussy walking around in one place in my life. The ratio must be 15 females to each guy. And when I say girls I mean the average female must only be 18 or 19 y... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  
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Shower Her With Something

Recently I made an unexpected big splash in our new neighborhood. We just moved to a new home the end of this past week. The home was a former model home and it was the largest of the three model homes in a model center that was sold off and the previous office. So, naturally the home has all the bells and whistles. Well, that is except one thing... they disarmed the alarm system when we closed on the house. I noticed this when we were opening and closing the door constantly moving furniture in the front door. I wasn’t hearing the high pitched “beep” I used to hear when we first viewed the hou... Continue»
Posted by bigsoftee 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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