Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 63

B7 Chapter 15 Epilog - Washington

Chapter 15: Epilog - Washington

The cigarette smoking man smiled as he drove to work at the Pentagon on Monday morning. All in all, it had been a very good week for him. Although he couldn't be there to see the shit hit the fan in person, he had a very good idea of what had happened recently on the Island in the Bahamas. The intelligence satellites and the information systems at the Pentagon could keep track of just about anything on the globe, after all. Not many people on the planet had known about the starship that was recently in orbit about the earth, but his agency was one of the... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
149
  |  
100%

Renaissance Man - No Sex But How To Be A Guy Women

If you are a nice guy then you are a Renaissance Man.

Never put yourself down as average or guy next door.
Nothing wrong with being a nice guy.
You can role play, but inside women will sense a player vs a man.

Women who do play or desire sex here are not sluts despite what they may post.
That is just a label...they are still women inside.
Just as not all who are on here are perverts, but mostly real men and women who either find it an escape or way to hook up and satisfy their needs.
If a woman is f***ed into a sex role by her man then be aware it might not be the fantasy it a... Continue»
Posted by asianflyer 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
234
  |  
100%
  |  5

B6 Chapter 17 Conflict

Chapter 17: Conflict

Dee Dee and Ebony strolled through the corridors of the Island on their way back to Dee
Dee's lab. "I figure since the company has a web-server, we can order the new door and the parts we need now, and we'll get those in a few days," said Dee Dee. She stopped at the door to the lab and keyed in the entry code. The door stayed locked. "What the heck? I know I haven't changed the codes recently. So much stuff has been happening, I've forgotten to do it
lately."
Dee Dee carefully punched in the five-digit code again, taking her time not to mistype a
key. T... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
76
  |  
50%

B6 Chapter 18 Run For Your Life

Chapter 18: Run For Your Life

Barocca ran from Dee Dee's lab with all of the speed she could muster. She didn't know if she should try to make it to where her girls were staying on the other side of the Island in one sprint. Or if she should try short dashes, and lessen the time she was exposed in the hallways to the other girls.
Then Barocca decided upon a course of action for the short term. "I'll duck into the first
set of quarters that I can find. Then I'll call the other girls on the cellular phone, and tell them to be ready for me. I can use a short rest, and it'll make it... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
83
  |  
60%

B6 Chapter 16 Rebellion

Chapter 16: Rebellion

After leaving the temporary quarters with Rhiannon, Barocca had met Jeanne in the hallways, as they both headed towards Dee Dee's lab. They were just about to turn the corner to Dee Dee's lab, when they heard a door opening.
"Hold it, Jeanne. Someone's coming." The two girls stayed out of view, until the door had closed again. Barocca stuck her head out, and cautiously peered down the corridor. She watched Dee Dee disappear in the opposite direction.
"It's Dee Dee. Looks like no one's getting much sl**p tonight. I don't know where she's
going, but now ... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
113
  |  
60%

B6 Chapter 3 Accusations

Chapter 3: Accusations

Jordan and Jeanne had just finished their session in the Milking devices. Because of the extra help that Dee Dee had given Jordan's balls, Jordan was the clear winner in this event. Both Barocca and Jeanne had finished viciously insulting and accusing Dee Dee and Tiffany of cheating of some sort.
At this point, Rhiannon and the Vectran girls entered the auditorium from the side. Rhiannon decided to make a bold entrance, and called out, "Well, well! Is this a private party, or can anyone join in?"
Everyone in the auditorium turned to face the new arrivals. ... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
69
  |  
60%

B5 Chapter 24 The Vectrans Arrive - Part 2

Chapter 24: The Vectrans Arrive - Part 2 (Or: Now You See It, Now You Don't )

The next day, the landing party beamed down to the Bahamas successfully, and they managed to mingle with the population without incident for the most part. To the rest of the townspeople, they appeared to be six other women who were on vacation, and they paid them no undue attention. Unfortunately, along with not being noticed by the locals, the six Vectrans had spent several days on the Islands, with very little success to report so far. The girls gathered together at a fast food restaurant for lunch one afte... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
117
  |  
100%

B5 Chapter 21 The Vectrans Arrive

Chapter 21: The Vectrans Arrive (I Knew We Should've Taken That Left Turn at Albuquerque)

The starship Delphi 4 pulled into orbit around the earth. Long before the starship had come within range of any detection devices on earth, the Vectrans had activated a cloaking device for the ship.
"Cloaking device activated, Commander," said Rayleena. "We're now in orbit about the planet. They'll never know that we're up here, unless something should happen to hit us, and our sensors are too sophisticated for that to happen."
"Very good, Rayleena," Rhiannon replied. "All right. Rayleena, ... Continue»
Posted by gregster 3 years ago  |  Categories: Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor, Shemales  |  
112
  |  
100%

Great threesome with two hotties...

The three of us stumbled through the front door of the house. It was myself, Sarah and Mika. We all arrived at Mika's house after long night of partying... Mika gave me the offer to spend the night, she had a futon couch that was she said was surprisingly comfortable to sl**p on despite being several years old.(Yeah right...No futon for me) Although I had a little to drink, I wasn't in too bad shape that I couldn't drive... I only lived about 15 minutes away... However I was tired as hell, and combine that with some alcohol, you might as well double your B.A.C. level, I may have to consider he... Continue»
Posted by elquicko 3 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
2795
  |  
81%

100 Reason Why its Great to be a Woman


1. We can get laid anytime we want
2. We never have to buy our own drinks at the bar
3. We piss sitting down so its easier to pass out on the toilet when you're d***k
4. We get out of speeding tickets by crying
5. We get out of speeding tickets by showing a little cleavage or leg
6. We can sl**p our way to the top of the class
7. We get to shop at Victoria's Secret
8. We can marry rich and then not have to work
9. We never have to pay when we go out on dates
10. Men take us on all expense paid trips - all we have to do is sl**p with them
11. Men light our cigarettes for us
12. Men... Continue»
Posted by blidavoz 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
1405
  |  
73%
  |  19

My very first Story

(This is the first erotic story I ever attempted)

I woke up untangled myself from our embrace and went to quietly have a shower and get all cleaned up while you slumbered on lost into the land of dreams.



I quietly sneak back into bed stretching luxuriously loving the feeling of being all fresh and clean. It must have been some dream you were having as I noticed a tent in the sheet as quietly as I could I wriggled down to the end of the bed and gently pushed you onto your back, waited a few moments for you to settle back into deep sl**p, I gently made room between your legs my hair ... Continue»
Posted by ssbbwcuddlyslut 3 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
632
  |  
99%
  |  15

Headteacher's Punishment


As I lay on the cold hard pale blue tiled floor of the school's store-room, tied up helplessly by Kaylee and her mean little gang, with the humiliating 'Fart in My Face' sign she left by my head, I was visited and farted on by lots of the school teachers. Lucky for me, they were only the female teachers. I smelt lots of flavourful womanly farts that day, and it was finally coming towards the end of the school day.

The end of my embarrassing torture, or so I thought...

The very last visitor came into the store-room.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!" The old cow yelled. It was my headte... Continue»
Posted by azid619 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
1239
  |  
94%
  |  5

Found how kinky my girlfriend is.

Alright so last night I found out how really kinky my girlfriend is and I'll telling you why at the end. So last night I had gotten out of the shower and was in our bedroom and my girlfriend starts talking to me about average day things, then randomly she says to me "Hey babe, when's the last time you cummed in my heels?" Well, I was honest with her and told it's been awhile since I have because we've been busy and I asked her why and she says "Just wondering." So I'm still covered with a towel because I'm trying to find clothes to wear and I hear her in our closet and at that time I didn't th... Continue»
Posted by shoeluvr 3 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
1358
  |  
81%
  |  8

The Torture

You are home alone. You find yourself looking around to determine what next to do. Wow, it’s been so long since you had the house to yourself. You sit on the couch thinking, “Hmmm what to do?” You end up falling asl**p on the couch. Sweet dreams begin.
In your dreams you smell lavender and you get this feeling that someone is with you, but who? This dream is peaceful and you find yourself relaxing. This person with you has soft hands, you think to yourself, “don’t let this dream stop it’s been too long since someone has made me comfortable”. Your entire body has been gently massag... Continue»
Posted by Feistybabe63 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
456
  |  
88%
  |  5

THE TRUTH ABOUTEATING PUSSY LADIES

I had to write this because men get a bad rap that we dont eat enough pussy so i had to break it down so that it was forever and correctly BROKE. Men love eating pussy ive seen men in strip clubs eating stripper pussy (nasty). First lets talk about the pussy. It is nasty as hell and you should that the heavens men even want to put their mouth down there. Yall pee thru it fuck with it men cum (big loads) inside of it, Babies come out of it, discharges, yeast infections, bladder infections, yall bleed stinky bl**d for a week an get mad at who wont eat it? Then some of yall dont know how to ke... Continue»
Posted by swat_tx 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
669
  |  
74%
  |  3

First Time Chubby Chaser

This is a true story, my first time writing as well. Happened in the winter of 2011. Makes me laugh whenever I think about it, haven't told friends so I would like to share with someone lol.

It was a Saturday on a very cold, typical Alberta winter night. Roommate and I had just finished a long hitch of OT. Decided to unwind have some drinks at the house and head to a club. Usual time looking for women and hitting the drinks hard lol

Met a few nice ladies, added a few new contacts in the cell, but no action.
Left the club decided to walk away from the crowd in hopes of flagging a cab.
... Continue»
Posted by m-i-k-e 3 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
2502
  |  
86%
  |  5

School Girl Bullies pt. 2


I awoke to the annoying loud sound of my alarm going off.

I turned it off and laid in my bed for a few moments contemplating the day ahead. It suddenly dawned on me that I'm very likely to run into those cruel girls from yesterday again, and a big grin crept across my face.

I jumped out of bed, bounced around getting dressed putting on my silly uniform, ran down the hall to the bathroom, brushed my teeth and combed my messy bedhead hair.

"Have a nice day!" I cheerily told my reflection in the mirror, and hopped off down the stairs and rushed out the door. I was so excited, for the f... Continue»
Posted by azid619 3 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
748
  |  
76%
  |  1

The New Sexual Awakening Part 4

Trevor found himself lying half naked in a bush, his shirt was off and his pants were around his ankles.

"How did I get here!" he asked himself.

He looked around at his surroundings and as he picked up his clothes which were strewn across the yard his memory came flooding back.

Several hours earlier...

Trevor had made a huge mess of things. His Spring Break visit was supposed to be a time to reconnect with his f****y but instead he brought a boozed up Bar Fly home for a romp in his Superman sheets.

After a weekend of apologising he had finally set things right with his mother ... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 3 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
739
  |  
87%
  |  2

Motel Room Sex

When I was done with my Air f***e boot camp, right out of high school, I was sent to a tech school in Texas. I was in my motel room one night, laying naked on the bed, and heard a couple come in. Just remember that I was down there for 18 weeks with out having any sex. So any ways I heard a couple come in and I was half asl**p and I heard the woman in the room next to me moaning and I got so hard I listened to them and then she said to her hubby you are so d***k. Then I heard the door open and then I got up to see if it was her or him and it was her so I put on my shorts and went out in th... Continue»
Posted by kbking70 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
4061
  |  
93%
  |  4

Morning Wood

Stretching with a groan, my hands reach for the warm body I can feel under the covers beside me. The early morning light pours in from the window just above the bed, and as my hands run over your chest -tangling in the thick hair that covers it- I can feel you reaching up to close the blinds. A smile erupts on my suddenly warm face, there can only be one reason for closing the blinds at this time of the morning. I reach above us to the windowsill to grab my glasses, making sure to lean as far over you as possible, my breasts raking over your chest causing my sensitive nipples to harden suddenl... Continue»
Posted by experiencedvirgin 3 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
487
  |  
95%
  |  3